MayDreamer
I am not much of a brainy but I do write sometimes so please support me. Discord: MayDreamer#0755 Instagram: MayDreamer_ Novels • Irene The Lady Who Turned Down Fate • Fall For You Again
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MayDreamer1yrCommentedCh 1 Prologue- MayDreamer1yrPosted
Firstly...Sorry but I don't really know what level up and etc etc anime are plus nor do I know on which anime this fanfic is based on. But I must say despite all that I really really enjoyed this novel, for me this was a little stress relief and lighthearted novel (I have only read the first few chapters idk if it gets intense in the later parts) I really enjoyed the comical parts a lot, plus the convo between the MC and his teacher about the third partner ( I don't remember the names) "Can he fight?" "No but he can run" this lines were just the best. The overall flow and emotion of the novel was well balanced and the world description, situation are all well described. Last but not the least , Happy Writing Author~~
- MayDreamer1yrReplied to LuciferVermillion
I think so too...I will just change it~
"Too late... Bin Ge!!" Ling who was already in his arms said while giggling. - MayDreamer1yrReplied to LuciferVermillion
I know Chinese words have other meaning too but haven't I already written in author note that here the 'Ge' means brother. So, why would there be confusion?
"Too late... Bin Ge!!" Ling who was already in his arms said while giggling. - MayDreamer1yrReplied to LuciferVermillion
Yeah although idk how bin is written in chinese
"Too late... Bin Ge!!" Ling who was already in his arms said while giggling. - MayDreamer1yrCommented
Okay this para really made me laugh 😆
"He can run." - MayDreamer1yrCommented
And man why didn't you help him?
The young security guard sneered. He said, "Who doesn't know Kevin's gang beats you up once every few days for ridiculous reasons? Why don't you fight back?" - MayDreamer1yrCommented
Haha congrats you got Iskeai!!
"Okay. This kid looks better than me… but I don't look like this!" - MayDreamer1yrCommented
So handsome~
A teen's pale face with gray eyes and shoulder-length silver hair stared back at him. He wore a gray t-shirt with a black hoodie. His ear piercings and a red ruby necklace were the only uncommon things on him. - MayDreamer1yrReplied to AstroU_1
- MayDreamer1yrPosted
Honestly after reading this novel, I feel like I am not capable enough to review it, everything about it is perfect, except for the long para that you can break into smaller para. The story setting, the foreshadowing, the character design, the world building and the suspense is on a whole another level. Seriously till now this is the best Sc-fi novel I have ever read! I am extremely excited to know further about who the real villain is Julia or Thomas ( I just have my doubts on him😉) Also there are some scenes that I found a bit confusing and I have already mentioned them in the comments. Last but not the least, Good Work Author!! Your work really made my day today!
- MayDreamer1yrCommented
Heath, Julia and Thomas are brothers...but I have my doubts on Thomas rather than on Julia
``Can I ask, how do you know Heath?`` Eden asked. ``His my younger brother.`` the man replied as he continued kicking the rock. ``So who is your older brother?`` Eden asked. ``Oh him, his name his Julia....`` but before he could finish, a large circular portal emerged out of nowhere. Then suddenly Eden felt a strong gravitational pulling him towards the portal. He wanted to resist but the force was to strong. ``Before I go,, tell me who did this!?`` Eden asked with a loud voice. ``It is Julia...`` - MayDreamer1yrCommented
Here Eden is looking for his parents and friend, so using "Where are you" would be better as using "Look at Me" makes it sound like they can't see Eden...which I believe is not the real scenario.
This paragraph has been deleted. - MayDreamer1yrCommented
"Someone she tell him about heath" This line confuses me...
``That new kid... he is something else.`` Elliot said with a soft voice. ``Someone she tell him about Heath.`` he added. Elliot`s words hit Regina hard. ``What is wrong with him`` Regina asked. ``He is an air of the Harrison Family and our class rep. Does that not say something!?`` Elliot replied. ``Just keep quiet if you have nothing to say!! Regina said as she rolled her eyes. BEEEEEEPPPP... ``Attention sorry for this interruption, Eden Davies please come to the office with your school back.`` the intercom said as it grabbed everyone`s attention. ``What did you do. Did you get in trouble`` one of the learners jokingly asked. ``I do not know!`` he replied with a confused look on his face. - MayDreamer1yrCommentedCh 1 Chapter 1: Step in the right direction? Current year:2050
- MayDreamer1yrCommented
A strong start👏
This paragraph has been deleted. - MayDreamer1yrReplied to Imsuperberbs20
Haha I understand 😌 very Welll
This paragraph has been deleted. - MayDreamer1yrReplied to Vigilant_Dreamer
- MayDreamer1yrReplied to Vigilant_Dreamer