Arrowinmyknee
I took an Arrow in my knee, so I started writing.
Writing
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110
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Oh come on, not the random powerful character that suddenly appears in the FF, that hasn't even any sign of existence, not even when the whole country was invaded by another in Canon.
Nah you aren't dumb. Knowledge is power. Even just listening would give him a lot information about the world he is living in.
*post death
that's not True. The Naruto universe has Planetary level threads Kaguya, Madara, Obito, Natuto, Sasuke and so on theoretical there could be even cosmic level threads with Hagoromo ppost earth and Shiba Otsuki, while the highest in one piece is Multi Continental Continental with Whitebeard.
doesn't feel cliche at all. It would have been a cliche if the MC was Jon Snow or something. But you wrote a compelling Dragon MC, and choose a pairing you thought fit. Though I am a bit disappointed that it isn't another dragon. In the end it's your story and you should write what you feel is right.
Damn this became boring and stretched out. And I write that around chapter 600 there are still over 800 to go from the Original. The Villains have the Plot Armor and get buffed beyond reason. Nagato has for example unlocked Limbo on the same level as Madara fucking Uchiha in the original after he became the Jinchuuriki of the Juubi, and no Nagato is not a Jinchuuriki he just got the Plot device Hashirama Cells boosting him beyond reason.
isn't this right after the Kyubi attack, that means Asuma is like 15-16 and didn't even leave yet for the Guardian Ninjas. That happens 7 years before the series, so in around 5 years.
World: MHA, Wish: Nanomachines, Quirk he was born with: Telekinesis. Suddenly he pulls qi cultivation, Mental Energy, Telepathy, Pyrokinesis, Blablakinesis, and so on out if his ass. This makes no fucking sense and makes the story just a senseless mess of powers without a real explanation. Martial Arts is basically Cultivation is not an explanation. I predict this story won't go far be it popularity or the Author himself, he will have trouble to keep track of what his MC can do since it doesn't make any sense. Writing Quality: 3/5 Readable with Mistakes Story Development: 1/5 Have all Powers now Canon starts isn't a Story. Character Design: 1/5 The MC is plain hasn't much depth, keeps distance from others, Powers are the only thing he has. We don't really know what he even wants. Update Stability: 3/5 Fresh story but doesn't give confidence of going anywhere. World Background: 1/5 For it being a MHA fiction not much to do with Quirks or Heros besides the MC randomly proclaiming he wants to be a Hero without a reason, or suddenly also needing a Villain Identity. More a cultivation Story with random powers.
Story makes no sense. There is no Aburame without bugs, they receive the nests at birth, it's not really their choice, before they even could make decisions they don't know anything else. Even if the Setting was possible, why would you write an Story with an Aburame as MC if you don't want them to have their insects...
80 chapter long filler/training arc. Interesting idea but slow and boring to read. You can skip easily 5 chapters without having missed anything. Timeline of the story makes no sense it's off by around 10 years (281 was Roberts Rebellion in Canon and Robb and Jon birth, here they are 7-8 years old.) I believe so no idea how far away from the story beginning we are at least 4 years which took already 80 chapters training/filler. Not really a good read, no idea why there only are 5 star review.
Setting was good, that's the only good thing about the story. Turned quite quickly to shit. Grammar is okay. There is the typical Fanfic stereotypes of talentless Authors to turn the Main cast of the Original into Assholes. Ace has no Affinity whatsoever even after more than 70 chapters for some shit plot idea of the Author. Plot Armor in Form of some unheard superpowerful Academy suddely appearing taking Ace in. Just a bad and frustrating story.
Neither fits the World Background...
If that was true why do people only receive their Hogwarts Letter for each year during the Summer Holidays and not on their birthday? How do they know which books needs to be on the letter if the defense teacher changes every year and chooses their own book and is only decided on during the Summer Holidays. (see Lockhart who put all his books on the list or Umbridge who chooses useless ones without magic). You know that you have a thing called brain, try using it. It's simple Logic.
witch... a magician does card tricks.