Review Detail of ctleans in Divine Path System
Review detail
(Has spoilers but breaks formatting, so marked with warning below) It's been a while since my last review, and a lot has changed. The story has developed much further but I still have multiple problems with the story. The writing quality has seen visible improvement. It is not perfect, idiomatic phrases are a bit awkward, but it is definitely getting there. Update stability is not a problem. Story development is okay. In my opinion, it bounces around a lot. I would not say it is boring, The characters, however, are what I find the most unappealing. Varian, flat, static, generic, adventurous and sharp-tongued hero. He's not a genius in my book but whatever. Not a problem, but then comes the other characters. They do not receive enough development or as much "screen time" and usually only have one or two trait that define them. Want some examples? (Spoilers now) - Sarah: Clingy lover - Sia: Recluse lover - System: Jerkass assistant - Boo: Jerkass-ish child - Enigma: Jerkass-ish mother (of Sia) - Julius: Jerkass If you have not noticed, most of these are female. The story is oversaturated with female characters. It is almost like he is building some harem (I hate using that word)— except there is already a distinct romantic subplot of this story, alongside an archetypal girlfriend conflict that does not really work. Sia is not well developed enough to even qualify as a girlfriend. Sarah appears more like a friend and the romance between them feels extremely forced. It would have been cooler if Julius was just doing his big evil plans out of responsibility and necessity, but nah. He is the big bad evil. Kyle and whatever that other girl's name is are barely important to the story. In fact, I speculate that they could be easily removed and nothing about the story will change. Besides that, this tier system has shown its flaws, especially during conflicts when, "they're magically forced to separate, ignoring the fact that a level 9 could just go fight the group of level 8's instead and win." Or or or or or, https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/PlotTailoredToTheParty. Having 10 levels is already a lot, but then there is a need to split them into sub levels, and between level 6 and level 7 there's another 6 stages to cross. Makes no sense.
Divine Path System
_Transcendent
Liked it!
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Another thing I want to add: The story is built around "1 power good. 2 power bad. 3 power doesn't exist." As such, most people have just 1 power, and Varian, even if he wanted to, can't use all of his powers. The powers are built around some elemental system. Fire, water, space, lightning, plant? Problem is, there's nothing elemental about this. They all function the same. You can sense stuff with fire, kill stuff with fire, have more defense with fire. There's virtually nothing distinctive or rock-paper-scissor based fights between them. This makes fights a game of which person has the higher level, and usually they're going to be the same... at peak level. I understand that the story can not longer be rewritten, but I think the different powers should have been more different, or at least, something like Pokemon.
While I can't completely agree that the characters are one dimensional, I do think they have one strong trait associated with them. Won't be denying that the story should've given more development, screen time and depth to characters. Its a work in progress. About the power system, it should've been given more depth and explored more. Well, I'll see what I can do after part 1 ends. The paths will all be new. Ig your feedback will be a gòod heads up. Lastly, Thanks for the criticism. A lot of readers shy away from it, but whether I agree with them or not, I really appreciate any feedback backed by a proper explaination. :)
_Transcendent:While I can't completely agree that the characters are one dimensional, I do think they have one strong trait associated with them. Won't be denying that the story should've given more development, screen time and depth to characters. Its a work in progress. About the power system, it should've been given more depth and explored more. Well, I'll see what I can do after part 1 ends. The paths will all be new. Ig your feedback will be a gòod heads up. Lastly, Thanks for the criticism. A lot of readers shy away from it, but whether I agree with them or not, I really appreciate any feedback backed by a proper explaination. :)
author can you answer me a question? I'm at cap 61 I'm still far away but I wanted to know if you plan on making the MC use a heavy weapon because there's so much path he'll use morph, body and plant taking into account how much health a plant has like that other body path that can override a stat so using high life stat in force would give the MC strength levels insane so using a light longsword is useless and will not make use of the MC's strength and along with the gravity path it can further increase the power of the attacks and well as much force as he and as much strength as he already has, the word weight doesn't exist so there's no way a weapon gets lighter than that and I'm not talking about the weapon not cutting, it can very well cut and have weight we attack and as I already said all this with gravity even a weapon without a strong would still rip the opponent's body
_Transcendent:While I can't completely agree that the characters are one dimensional, I do think they have one strong trait associated with them. Won't be denying that the story should've given more development, screen time and depth to characters. Its a work in progress. About the power system, it should've been given more depth and explored more. Well, I'll see what I can do after part 1 ends. The paths will all be new. Ig your feedback will be a gòod heads up. Lastly, Thanks for the criticism. A lot of readers shy away from it, but whether I agree with them or not, I really appreciate any feedback backed by a proper explaination. :)