Chapter 36 - Water 7 Pt 1 1/2

It had been a couple of days since we set off from the last island, and thoughts of our defeat at Aokiji's hands were still on everyone's minds. Let it not be said, however, that the Straw Hats were a crew known to mope or brood. Rather than letting things stew, everyone had gotten over it out of necessity to be strong for Robin in the face of the trauma Aokiji had unearthed, and then pressed on by submerging themselves in training with my advice. With the extra knowledge and clear goals in mind for how to reach the next level of strength, it wasn't hard for everyone to move past the past and focus on both the present and future.

'Of course,' I thought murderously, curling my torso as I hung from the Merry's mast by my boots, with a well-sized weight hanging from my armored wrists and murdering my shoulders. 'The issue here is that the greater the gain you desire, the more and more pain that is required.'

Unfortunately (for me at any rate), due to the flesh of my limbs still being in the process of re-solidifying into a form I wasn't guaranteed to ruin just by flexing my biceps, Zoro's focus on my training had been diverted to my core muscles. And by his reasoning, if I couldn't strain all of my muscles, I'd have to compensate with the ones that I could strain, hence my current predicament. Only the fact that it was this hell that had kept me conscious against Eneru and Aokiji kept me from hurling every invective I could think up at the swordsman. And even then, it was a close thing.

So, instead, I turned my thoughts to more pressing matters. Namely, the fact that every second we sailed was a second closer to Water 7, and with the approach of the sinking island also approached a lot of trouble. Sure, I was almost positive that I had braced Usopp for the possibility of losing the Merry, but Robin…

I suppressed a grimace as I surreptitiously glanced at where she was relaxing in her folding chair and reading one of her books. I wanted to trust Robin, I really did, but unfortunately, we'd rounded a creek and traveled into a whole new territory of mistrust. Rather than having to worry about her betraying the crew, now I had to worry about her betraying herself for our sake! And somehow? Somehow, watching out for Robin making a self-destructive move was even more nerve-wracking than watching for her trying to betray us wholesale.

And the worst part was that if my mistrust turned out to be well-founded, Robin's skills all but guaranteed that we wouldn't find out until it was too late and she'd already attempted to martyr herself, at which point the only way out would be the hard way.

I grimaced as images of a pit in the ocean and a fleet of stupidly massive ships flashed behind my eyes.

The very, very, very hard way.

In the end, there really wasn't much I could do except make sure Chopper and Sanji stuck to her like glue and warn everyone of two things: first, to not fight the Franky Family in case of the remote (hopefully very remote, at that) chance that they hadn't become fans of the SBS, and second, to steer clear of the four undercover agents, though that'd be kept amongst my confidants on account of how they were the only ones who I knew were capable of reliably maintaining poker faces. Except Sanji, but with Kalifa as a factor, I wasn't taking any chances there.

Of course, right now, I had little choice but to postpone those particular conversations until after we met Kokoro. After all, aside from Robin's quiet reading and Luffy's casual relaxation on the Merry's figurehead, everyone onboard was training.

Usopp had finally managed to finish Nami's Perfect Clima-Tact, but she had only done a cursory confirmation of the staff's capabilities before she went to Donny to get used to the new shape. There didn't seem to be much change from what I had seen coming, since the Eisen Dial and its mechanisms fit into an extra interchangeable bulb on the butt of the weapon. In any case, if the way she was going against Donny was any indication, it seemed like the new form was even better for bojutsu than a traditional staff.

Conis was taking full advantage of the extra storage space that the clothes she borrowed from my wardrobe provided. Bazookas were her weapons of choice, but she had spared no effort fitting as much firepower as she could handle on her body. Pistols, Dials, shotguns, burn blades, even a full-sized rifle slung across her back. And Mikey was right alongside her, quickly becoming proficient with a pair of pistols. The way he was spinning them around, quite expertly I might add, I was just waiting for him to ask Robin to borrow one of her cowboy hats to complete the look. And beside both of them was Lassoo, who was test-firing the new Blaze mechanism Conis had installed in his gut. It was still a bit testy, and his pillar wasn't as big as what Conis was sporting, but the superheated blasts he was belting out were still quite impressive.

Vivi and Carue were taking turns sparring with Raphey, the Dugong's size and skill proving an even match against Vivi's reach and Carue's speed; the two were improving fast, though like a lot of the crew, being confined to the Merry was limiting how much they could get done. Still, they were leaps and bounds ahead of what they'd been when we left Alabasta. At a guess, I'd say that they were of a level of strength appropriate for the Mr. 3 or Mr. 4 team.

Sanji, spurred on by his rivalry with Zoro, had managed to work out the Tempest Kick technique, though he was having trouble preserving the 'blade's' stability for more than a foot or so, after which the air harmlessly dissolved. He wasn't even content enough to name it. Hence, he was on the edge of the Merry, teeth gritted in concentration as he fired shot after shot. It was slow going, but I could see that every second he worked on it, the fissures in the surface of the ocean grew deeper and longer.

Zoro, meanwhile, said that he had worked on his Asura technique enough to be confident using it and had diverted his energy to other pursuits instead. Namely, the Iron Body technique. Leo was drafted to help him practice, which seemed to consist of the amphibian slamming his fists into Zoro's torso over and over again. Naturally, Zoro was barely flinching at the impacts, and if the fact that Leo was starting to flex his aching flippers was any indication, he was fast figuring out the secrets of the technique. He'd probably have figured it out sooner if Leo were using the flats of his swords, but the dugong had begged off on account of how he was afraid that the endeavor would damage his blades. Still it was training Leo's strength as well. Or at least, that was what Boss said, going off of his experience strengthening his own flippers over the years.

Speaking of Boss, he was the only one not suffering from reduced space, having decided to try out his new Thermal Dart—which aside from a slightly sleeker hook looked the same as before—against the local marine life. Luffy, in particular, had been happy with Boss tossing skewered fish after scorched fish onto the deck, along with allowing the occasional pummeled and insensate adolescent Sea King to float to the surface. In all honesty, Boss was tough enough already, but if the Heat Dial improved him that much… well, the Monster Quartet may be a thing after all.

Chopper, thankfully enough, had buried himself in the storage room and was working on expanding his chemical arsenal as well as studying how he could potentially tune down his Monster Point into something less likely to make Thriller Bark look more inviting than wherever he was turned loose. Unfortunately and unsurprisingly, he wasn't having much luck on the latter, which meant we would have to hope that his new arsenal was enough that we wouldn't be dealing with a 36-foot-tall stupidly tough and powerful mad scientist if worse came to worst.

And last but most surprisingly, Usopp was practicing the Shave technique as he moved back and forth across the ship, dodging everyone's training sessions as he did so. However, the training was just a side benefit; the sniper was more concerned with attempting to locate the source of some kind of sound that he swore hadn't been present before. He had tried asking Soundbite, but the snail had blown him off in favor of remaining ensconced in his shell to focus more than ever on thinking about Awakened Devil Fruits. After weighing several pros and cons, Usopp had left him alone. Sadly, while his speed was exhibiting a marked improvement, his feverish movements and muttering, which were only getting worse as his leg pain intensified, were quickly eroding the patience of some of the crew.

"Where is it, where is it, where is it…" he muttered as Carue and Raphey hastily changed direction to avoid skewering him. "Dammit! It keeps coming and going!"

I cocked an eyebrow as I decided to speak up, if only for his sake. "Hey, Usopp! Just a suggestion, but I recommend that you work on your situational awareness next."

"Huh?" The sniper came to a dead stop as he looked up at me. "How come?"

I let my expression fall flat. "Because you're currently standing on Mikey's head."

"Eh?" Usopp glanced down in surprise. "Huh. So I am."

Several people paused in their training long enough to facepalm.

"Dude…" Mikey growled as he started to finger the new flintlocks at his side. "I respect you, but if you don't get off me soon, I'm gonna throw you off! And I mean the Merry!"

Usopp hastily complied, scrambling off of Mikey and zipping to the other end of the ship.

"But seriously, Usopp, what are you muttering about?" Sanji asked in irritation, turning away from the ocean and looking at him.

"Wha—? Oh, right, I only told Cross." Usopp promptly slapped a hand to his forehead. "See, I can hear some kind of weird sound coming from somewhere on the ship. I don't know what it is, but it's distracting me from finishing my upgrades!"

"And Soundbite isn't helping you with that because?" Nami asked.

"Because he's focusing on training even more than Zoro is," I grit out as I curled upwards. My gut hurt like hell, but it sure beat letting the blood flow to my head!

"Why not just put in earplugs or something?" Conis asked curiously.

"I tried that, but it's not going away! Just listen!"

Several sighs rang out around the deck, but ultimately, everyone paused their training and listened. For a second, there was nothing. Then the sound came, clear as a bell: wood scraping against wood, like two planks rubbing together. It was… very irritating.

"Alright, now that you draw attention to it…" I trailed off with a grimace.

"Great, now it's going to be stuck in my head all day!" Nami griped as she dug a finger through her ear.

"See? So, maybe I could get some help finding—" Usopp began.

"Hey, guys, look! A frog doing the front crawl!"

All attention was promptly diverted from Usopp to Luffy and then to where Luffy was staring and pointing. And sure enough, there was a tan and white frog, heavily scarred with black hair in a sumo hairstyle, performing the front crawl in the water not far from us. There was no mistaking it: we'd just caught sight of Yokozuna.

And there was no chance in hell that I was going to pass up this glorious of an opportunity.

"Huh, that is a frog doing the front crawl," I noted casually.

"I'm impressed that a frog can do the front crawl," Donny commented with a slight tilt to his head.

"Anyone else curious about where the frog doing the front crawl is going?" Vivi asked.

"I'm more curious about why the frog is doing the front crawl," Lassoo shrugged.

"Maybe the frog is—!"

"Okay, this gag's lived long enough," Su deadpanned.

"What gag, COTTONTAIL?" Soundbite said as he finally decided to rejoin the living.

"The one where everyone's repeating 'the frog do—' OH, NO, YOU DON'T!" she snapped.

"SO CLOSE!"

I chuckled. "Good try, Soundbite," I commented, before raising my voice. "Alright, everyone, joking aside, that frog is the sign that our training time has expired! We've got one short stop coming up, and then we'll be landing at the next island later today! Start getting your shopping lists together, prepare the gold for landing… oh, yeah, and someone cut me down from here!"

"On it!" Leo volunteered as he drew a sword and started to tense his tail—!

"NonononoWAIT!" I yelped, waving my hands in protest, but too late. He leaped above me, swung his sword…

CLUNK! "OW!"

And I promptly found myself nursing what I was certain was a concussion.

"…I should know better than this by now," I grumbled matter-of-factly as I lay on my back. "I've tempted you-know-who enough times with how I word things that I should know better than to give it an opening like that. So, why, why do I keep doing it?"

"Because you're an idiot?" Zoro blandly asked as he looked down at me.

I was silent as I mulled that statement over before shrugging indifferently. "Eh, can't argue with that. Now, then!" I promptly ignored my screaming muscles as I sprang to my feet and snapped a finger forward. "Sorry, Nami, but I need to temporarily shanghai one of your duties because right now we need to follow that frog!"

"YEAH!" Luffy cheered emphatically.

"Sorry, Captain, he's got a tragic backstory, no grilling tonight."

"Awww…"

"Besides, frogs are terrible eating. Too many little bones," Zoro commented as he walked towards our armory/oar room, most likely to fish out the Dugongs' harnesses so they could tow the Merry.

"You're not supposed to eat them whole, moss-for-brains!" Sanji called after him.

While the Squad got themselves strapped up and prepared to dive into the waves, Usopp took the time to tap me on the shoulder. "Hey, Cross, while I'm sure from what you said that asking too much about that frog would fall under the 'spoilers' category—!"

"Indubitably," I nodded solemnly.

The sniper rolled his eyes at my dramatic tone before continuing. "—can you at least say how the—?"

"Watch it."

Usopp shivered as a vicious growl wafted over from Conis' general direction. "How he can do the front crawl?"

I mulled over my response for a moment before coming to my conclusion and shrugging. "In layman's terms, a long while back, someone showed him the technique, and he practiced until he could do it."

"HA! You just defined how everyone's learned everything ever!" Boss barked jubilantly before turning his attention to his squad. "Now, then, enough lollygaggin'! C'mon, boys! Let's get to towin'!" And with that, he dove over the edge and into the water.

"BOSS, YES, BOSS!" the four other Dugongs chorused before following their teacher.

A moment later, the Merry jolted forward and started following Yokozuna at a respectable clip, though there was a distinct cost, in the form of an unmistakable groaning sound coming from the deck below our feet. I nervously glanced down before hastily jogging up to Merry's figurehead and rubbing her neck.

"Just a little further, Merry, just a little more…" I muttered reassuringly. "As soon as we reach the next island, you'll be in the hands of the world's best shipwrights, I promise that it won't be long now." I leaned my forehead against the whitewashed wood, eyes closed and a grim smile on my face. "I swear… I'm going to do everything that I can to keep my word."

"…!"

"Wha—?" I jerked my head back in shock. For some reason, rather than the calm that a placated Merry would have produced, I felt a rush of sheer emotion shoot through me like Eneru's lightning. The feelings were many, but not a single one of them was good: fear, sadness, depression, misery, anger… Guilt. Regret.

"W-What the hell—!?" I breathed incredulously.

"Hey, Cross!"

I was snapped out of my confusion by the Merry jerking to a halt—with yet another pained groan at that—and Boss leaping onto the railing near me.

I spared Merry a final glance before focusing on the dugong. "Ah… y-yeah? What is it, Boss?"

The martial-artist jabbed his thumb over his shoulder at the water. "There's a line of buoys floating in the water and something really weird floating beyond that, something the frog's getting on! Should we follow it?"

Before I could answer, Soundbite paled in terror on my shoulder as he craned his eyestalks to stare into the water before us. Specifically, at the silhouette floating below the surface. "You have GOT to be kidding ME…" he breathed numbly.

I processed the development for a moment before allowing myself a smug smirk. "Well, seeing how you've figured out what's going on, shall we harmonize our response?"

The snail hastily recovered with a smirk of his own. "LET'S!"

I slid into a flawless jazzhands as Soundbite and I grinned eagerly. "Nooooo~!" we sang, holding it out for a few seconds before I brought my fingers together in a cut-off sign.

Boss was unamused. "Very nice, you two. Now, why don't you—"

"WHOA!"

"HOLY SHIT!"

"WHAT THE HECK IS THAT!?"

"Eh?" Boss and I started to look towards what the rest of the crew was talking about—

WOOOT WOOOOOOOT!

—and then it was just there.

The Puffing Tom was… it was… wow, it was seriously something. I mean, I'd ridden my fair share of trains in my life, I was thoroughly familiar with the subways of New York and Paris and the TGVs of France, but this… this was a whole different beast.

And by God, there was no other word to describe the Puffing Tom than 'beast.' The size, the speed, the sheer aura of power that the mechanical marvel exuded… it was like looking at the primal epitome of industry and technology!

This… This was no mere train. This was a man-made Wonder of the World!

It also didn't hurt my opinion that I was a particularly avid fan of steampunk.

The moment of awe lasted for just that, a moment, and then time started up again as the engine roared past us and down the tracks, swiftly approaching the giga-toad positioned on the rails, palm extended and teeth grit in preparation.

I sent an inquiring glance at Soundbite. "So, I'm guessing Kermit or—?"

"STOP, PUFFING TOM!"

My questions were cut off in a sharp gasp as the frog roared a very familiar line in a relatively familiar voice. Before I could do anything else, however…

THWACK!

"GAH! DAMN IT!"

We observed the suddenly very un-funny sight of the giant toad getting swatted aside; the Puffing Tom didn't even slow down, disappearing over the horizon and leaving only a pillar of steam within seconds.

It was about then that I finished processing what I'd just seen and heard, and I slowly glanced back at Soundbite. "…Schwarzenegger?"

"I may be a cheeky BASTARD, BUT I CAN'T SPEND THIS MUCH TIME WITH THIS CREW and mock conviction LIKE WHAT I JUST heard," Soundbite replied, shaking his head solemnly. He then allowed himself a tentative grin. "'Sides… Going by those SCARS? He'll be back."

That got a slight grin from me as I remembered the few flashbacks we'd gotten to this particular stretch of the sea. "Not if we have anything to say about it, he won't."

Boss finally got his jaw working again, gnawing on his cigar, and he gave me a searching look. "So… tragic backstory, huh? Care to share?"

"As soon as it becomes relevant, don't worry," I said dismissively, waving him off.

"Ah, 'scuse me, question?" Lassoo spoke up, raising a paw. "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT THING!?"

I chuckled at the reaction. "Oh, ye of little experience. What you just saw was a steam-powered locomotive, more commonly referred to as a train, or in this case, a sea-train. It's the magnum opus and symbol of the island we're heading to next, Water 7, the greatest hub of shipwrights in the Grand Line. That train, the Puffing Tom, was the brainchild of the greatest of them all, a shipwright known as Tom. A frame of reference for how good he was: he built the Oro Jackson."

Robin, Nami, Vivi, and Sanji promptly gaped at me in shock, while everyone else just stared blankly at me.

"Roger's ship," I clarified with a sigh.

There were the dropped jaws.

"SO COOL!" the Kiddy Trio and the TDWS exclaimed together, looking after the train—actually, no, not quite. Usopp wasn't staring in awe; he had collapsed to his knees, sighing in sheer relief.

"Thank goodness," he said. "Now I see what you meant by this being the best chance we had for Merry, if we're heading to a place with shipwrights like that."

Aaaand just like that the atmosphere whiplashed right back around to solemn. And it brought the feeling I had before back to the forefront of my mind. Shaking my head, I looked down at the figurehead again. "There, Merry, you hear that? Is that enough to convince you that I'll be able to—?"

"…!"

"GAH!" I yelped, enough emotional force slamming into me that I actually jumped back—

THUNK!

"WhoawhoawhoawhoaSHIT!"

THWACK!

—bumped into the railing of the forecastle and unfortunately overbalanced, promptly falling ass over teakettle and onto the far far far too solid deck below.

I lay groaning upside down for a moment with my ass hanging over my head before glancing up(?) at my crewmates with a slightly confused look. "I'm… not the only one who felt that, right?"

"No, Cross, you're not," Zoro said quietly, and the distinctly bothered expressions on my crewmates' faces and the fact that Lassoo, Su, Carue, and the TDWS were curled up on themselves were enough to show that that blast of sheer emotion had affected everyone.

"I'm certain that I don't want to know the answer to this…" Robin started in an uncharacteristically shaky voice. "But what in the world was that?"

"That was unpleasant, was what it was!" called an older woman's voice from nearby. All attention turned towards the nearby building rising above the water that we'd somehow missed.

Its owner was a tubby woman with long, frizzy, light green hair, a large purple cap, a pink jacket, and a purple suit with khakis. A bottle of something alcoholic was in one hand, and contrary to my expectations, she was not smiling; the grim look on her face gave every implication that 'unpleasant' was an understatement.

Which was made particularly clear by the green-haired girl and blue rabbit lying beside her, white-eyed and foaming from the mouth.

"You felt that too, Granny?" I asked quizzically, to which I received a slap upside the head from Vivi.

"Seriously, Cross, I'd expect that kind of bluntness from Luffy, not you!" she said in astonishment.

"Eh, don't worry about it," Kokoro shrugged and waved her hand with a chuckle. "Lots of people call me Granny, I don't mind. I like it, even! Makes me feel respected."

"Whereas you continue to be far too impulsive without considering all the facts of the matter," I replied to the princess.

"I—but—you—that—!" Vivi started to sputter before settling on thwapping me with another dopeslap and marching back to Carue.

"So, how many times does that make, Soundbite?" Zoro asked.

"Crocodile, Octavio, RATCHET—!"

"HOW THE HELL WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT THAT BASTARD WAS OUT OF HIS MIND!?"

"Aaaaand RANDOLPH."

Vivi opened her mouth… and shut it with a click and a blush. "I… have no viable excuses…"

"SO this makes FIVE!"

"Well, at least this time didn't result in us all nearly getting killed," Nami muttered.

"Ahem?"

The cough brought our attention back to Kokoro, who lowered her fist from where it was in front of her mouth. "I suppose I should introduce myself better: my name is Kokoro." She nodded her head back at her insensate pet and relative. "And this is my granddaughter Chimney and our cat Gonbe. We're the caretakers of this switch station. The reason why they're both unconscious is that yes, we felt that. It wasn't enough to have that snail of yours bring up some bad memories by giving Yokozuna a voice—" I winced. "—but then… well, I've been in this business for a long time, young man," she said, staring at us with an expression of stone-cold sobriety. "I haven't felt a ship scream in agony for years."

And there went the humor again. Seriously, I knew that this arc was meant to be one of the more depressing ones, possibly the most besides everything between Sabaody and the time skip, but did that have to start now?

"Before you potentially chastise us about pushing her past her limits, believe us, we know that she's hurting," I hastily replied as we docked Merry beside the station. "We're headed straight for Water 7 to patch her up, no detours and no other objectives."

'Not if I can help it, anyway…' I mentally added.

She stared at me curiously for a moment, and then… then her expression contorted in grim realization. "You don't know yet."

The far too gentle tone of voice all but froze the blood in my veins. Apparently, yes, it did have to start now.

"…What do you mean, we don't know yet?" Usopp asked quietly.

Kokoro sighed tiredly, and then—

Re-re-note to self: age equals badass. I should have been able to reason that considering her stalwart performance at Enies. But if that wasn't enough, the fact that she jumped from the station onto the deck of the Merry with no sign of fatigue or pain whatsoever was a fresh reminder. Unfortunately, she still had that uncharacteristically serious look on her face, which prevented my surprise from lasting more than a second.

"I'm sorry to tell you this," she said grimly. "But the only time a ship could be in that much agony is if it were damaged beyond repair."

There was no warning, no preamble, just… it just hit us like cannonfire. Half of the crew bowed their heads, while the rest had looks of devastation on their faces. And me, personally? I felt as if the ground fell out from under me. A thoroughly apt comparison going by how I collapsed to my knees.

Usopp was the first to get his wits back about him, shaking his head in denial. "N-No, no! T-That, that can't be right!" Usopp denied. "W-We talked to her! W-We talked to Merry herself! Her Klabautermann! S-She said that she was hurt, yeah, but that—"

"But that she'd be able to tough it through for all your sakes?" Kokoro asked,

We looked at her in shock, and she sighed. "I told you, I've been in this business for a long time. While I can't say I've ever seen a Klabautermann myself, I've heard enough tales and seen enough ships that had them; it's a foregone conclusion that any ship that could give off that much emotion would be able to manifest him- or herself."

"…This probably isn't the time, but I thought all ships were female," Donny pointed out.

Kokoro shrugged. "It depends on the builder, the crew and the ship itself, though honestly unless the ship does come alive, it's just aesthetic." She shook her head firmly. "We're getting off-topic here. Listen, I know that I might not look it, but I know what I'm talking about here; your ship must have loved you a lot to continue on this far, but every story I've heard went the same way: ships only fix themselves and show themselves when they're already doomed."

"But that's not possible! Look around! She's still in one piece, she's still sailing!" Chopper protested. Kokoro looked at him.

"You're the doctor, right? Let me make an analogy for you: the keel of the ship is its spine. Any other part of the boat can be repaired or replaced, but if the keel cracks, that's a death sentence; it's only a matter of time from there before the ship splits in two."

"B-But how can you know that her keel is injured!?" Conis pleaded. "S-She said that it was hurt, yes, but—!"

"I know because I can hear the same thing that you all have been hearing for awhile now…" Kokoro sighed grimly. "That creaking sound… it's not just any two planks or some random issue. That's a constant cry of pain that proves that your ship, no matter how much you love her, is already dead in the water. That's the sound of two halves of a keel grinding together."

It felt like time froze for us as we stared at the station-master in stunned silence, the only noises present being the sound of waves lapping against the station and our beloved ship… and the tortured echo of wood rubbing ringing in our ears.

"You can't be serious! There's no way that her keel isn't still in one piece!" Raphey objected at last.

"Yeah! We've dived under this ship more times than we can count, and we've never seen any damage to her keel! Just solid wood and metal plating from repair work!" Mikey said assertively.

Kokoro sighed and glanced at the dugongs. "And… have you ever looked under the plating?"

The implications of that statement sunk in with all the speed and impact of Chopper's syringes: if that plating had covered up her cracks, then that meant that they happened back when…

"Merry… n-no, you-you're wrong! You have to be wrong! Merry—!" I shook my head desperately as I stared at Kokoro. "M-Merry, s-she said that she was fine, t-that she'd hold on! Y-You can't…" I fought to keep the tears out of my eyes. "No… damn it… No! Merry…"

I looked away from Kokoro, struggling to my feet and staring up at the figurehead. "Merry, please, tell her she's wrong, tell her, tell us you're as strong as ever! I-I know it's not fair to ask but… just for a second, just for a second. Tell us she's wrong. Please tell us she's wrong."

For a few moments, there was nothing but absolute silence, stillness…

And then she was just there, standing before us, a translucent spectre that radiated sadness, her head bowed so that the raincoat's hood hid her whole face from us.

Kokoro's bottle fell out of her hand and spilled onto the deck, and everyone else stiffened in shock.

And then… Merry spoke just two words.

"…I'm sorry."

Cross-Brain AN: Yep! We're just gonna leave it at that for now! Sorry that the chapter was so short, but hey, time constraints and all that, plus losing one's job over bullshit can be a bitch. Still, look at it this way: you just have that much more to look forward to in the next chapter!

Chapter 36 Part 2

Cross-Brain AN: Oh, come on, did any of you actually think that we were going to leave it at that? For shame, for shame. The cliffhanger is par for the course, sure, but the word count? Please, our standards are so much higher than that!

The Klabautermann disappeared as quickly as she had come. And that was the moment where the more sensitive among our crew lost the ability to hold their emotions back.

Consequently, ten minutes after meeting Kokoro found everyone on the crew except Zoro, Sanji, and Boss stewing in misery, one way or another. Robin kept some semblance of composure, but even she couldn't hold back from crying. Soundbite had gone into silent sulking, tears trickling down his eyestalks. Everyone else was either sobbing miserably or still stuck deep in shock.

Except for me, given the fact that after a couple of minutes of crying, I'd flipped my emotions to the opposite end of the spectrum and slammed myself straight into rage. Rage at Merry for lying to us, rage at the world for how stupidly, stupidly unfair this was… and rage at myself for failing. Sure, I was still clinging to some stupid hope that Franky would be able to find something in the black market that could help us with how much gold we had to spend: a Devil Fruit, a miracle fix-all, something, anything!

But in the end, the revelation that I hadn't been able to keep her keel from cracking… that my efforts to change something, to make things better, were all for nothing?

Magma and hell and evil and war war WAR!

"Damn it damn it damn it damn it!" I cursed viciously as I clutched at my skull.

"G-Granny, come on!"

I glanced over at Usopp as he pulled himself out of his despair and started pleading with the impassive station mistress as she chugged her bottle.

"Isn't there anything we can do to help?!" the sniper begged, tears streaming from his eyes. "A-A Devil Fruit, an ANYTHING—?!"

"There isn't," she replied, though she was noticeably less firm than she had been before; Merry's appearance had definitively shaken her, and going by the way she was swishing the last dregs of her bottle in front of her, she was definitely of the opinion that she needed a fresh one. "Do you think you're the first crew to ask? The first to love their ship so much that they'd do anything to keep sailing with them? Trust me; I know what I'm talking about: There are no Devil Fruit powers either nearby or even in the general waters that can fix it, no methods to permanently mend a keel, no techniques to replace it, nothing. There aren't many afflictions that the world's finest shipwrights can't fix, but a cracked keel is one of them. I'm sorry, I truly am, but your ship, strong and brave as she is… is done for."

Aaand that was officially my fucking breaking point.

SLAM!

The rest of the crew jumped and looked over at me as I ground my knuckles into Merry's neck-brace. "For fucks' sakes, you stupid, stupid, stupid goat…" I spat. "What the fucking hell were you thinking!?"

"She was thinking that she loved you." I shot a halfhearted glare over my shoulder at Kokoro, who was watching me evenly, and with more than a little pity. "She was thinking that she loved you all and that if you knew when it happened, you would compromise yourselves trying to help her. And the ultimate mission of any ship is to keep their crew safe. She wouldn't want you to sacrifice yourselves for a lost cause."

My arm quaked as I pressed my fist harder and harder into the metal plate. "I…I promised her…" I hissed tearfully.

Kokoro shrugged as she knocked back what little of her drink she had left. "Sorry, but I can't help you there. Personally, it sounds like a discussion to be had between you and your god. Or, well…" She waved her hand casually. "Your lack thereof, anyways."

I stiffened in response to that, frowning as a thought occurred to me—

CHOMP!

"OW?!" I yelped as I snapped my hand to my neck.

"ARE YOU really willing to risk it?" Soundbite snarled around the chunk of flesh he was gnawing.

I frowned as I considered the situation, and what could possibly go wrong, but the images of Merry burning in the snowfall and her apology that I had just seen stayed in the forefront of my mind.

"Only as a last resort, but considering the alternative?" I shook my head sadly. "I honestly can't rule it out yet."

Soundbite grimaced, but released my neck; there was no doubt which of the two evils was lesser, though I knew it was about as likely that B.R.O.B. would ignore me as it would help me. I then directed my attention back to the deck, where Zoro seemed to be running interference for Kokoro's curiosity.

"So… there's really no choice but to get a new ship?" he asked seriously.

Kokoro shook her head somberly, and with considerable reluctance, I turned towards the crew, moving away from the figurehead and down to the main deck. "Either we let her die with dignity, or we run her into the ocean. And I think we all know which one she wants… demands we pick."

"Are you saying we should abandon a member of our crew, Cross?" Luffy growled dangerously.

"Luffy…" Nami softly interjected before I could say anything. "The choice… either we leave her behind and let her go to sleep peacefully, or all of us die along with her. And any other day I'd be alright with that, but…" She trailed off helplessly.

"This… This is a choice that a captain has to make, Luffy," Vivi said, sadly but firmly. "I understand better than anyone not wanting to let any of the ones you care about die. But…" She glanced at me meaningfully. "The world… it just doesn't work like that. The only thing we can do is—" Her voice broke, and she bit her knuckle in a blatant attempt to keep from breaking down in tears.

"…In the aftermath of Blackbeard's attack…" Chopper spoke up solemnly. "There were just so many wounded. So many injured, so many dying…" The Zoan slowed his breathing in a visible effort to keep calm. "Doctorine used it to teach me the hardest and most vital lesson a doctor can ever learn."

Chopper looked up with a hard glint in his eyes. Only it wasn't madness. Just cold, clinical finality. "Triage. The practice of sorting patients by severity. Of choosing who you try and save. Of… Of recognizing a lost cause, for the sake of others." He shook his head as he remembered the day. "I've never forgotten what I learned: that no matter how good you are, no matter how skilled or how many resources you have at your disposal, you can never manage to save everyone. Sometimes, the kindest thing you can do is just… make their death as painless and dignified as possible."

Luffy bit his lip, trembling with repressed rage and sadness as he mulled the words over. Slowly but surely, he looked around the deck. His eyes fell on Sanji, whose hair shadowed his eye while he attempted to light a cigarette, the lighter flickering as his hands shook. He looked at Boss, who mimicked the motion with a cigar. He looked at Conis, who snapped her head away, her face pained as she thought of all the souls who'd made the mistake of landing on Angel Beach.

Finally, he looked at Usopp. The sniper's expression was somewhere in the middle of anger and anguish, but he seemed unable to speak. After a minute, he finally opened his mouth, but suddenly paled. He looked as if he'd just seen a—

Luffy and I snapped our heads around to follow his line of sight, but there was nothing. Nothing but the ship and the horizon. We looked back at Usopp, and slowly, some semblance of acceptance came over his face. Sighing, Luffy looked back at Kokoro.

"…Alright. We'll get a new ship," he said, his tone colorless and empty.

The second the words left his mouth, a wave of sheer relief brushed across us all. And I felt it like a titanic punch in the gut.

Sanji shuddered heavily as he fumbled for his cigarettes and shakily lit a new one. He took a shaky, calming draw before eyeing the present veteran. "Granny Kokoro… what do you recommend we do?"

The old woman kept an eyebrow up as she watched us before sighing and shaking her head. "In my opinion, if you want to do good by her, the best thing to do is take her to Water 7. Let her see you on to your next ship and watch you set sail. After that… I promise you, I will personally make sure that she's put to rest with all of the honor that she deserves."

"…We'd appreciate that, Granny Kokoro," Usopp said quietly.

"It's no less than she's earned; I've witnessed a lot of bonds of love between ships and crews in the past, but yours is easily the strongest I've ever seen," Kokoro nodded firmly. "But, in the meantime… you're going to need a new ship before you leave the island. There are plenty of good models to go off of, and I'm guessing that you have all of the gold that you need. I can give you a good reference, help you get the best ship money can—"

"Granny," I cut in sharply. I had to fight tooth and nail to keep my voice steady; what I was saying felt like I was accepting defeat, but… if all was said and done, if there really was nothing we could do, then I had to take advantage of this while I could. "We don't need the best. We're sailing this ocean for one purpose above all else: to reach Raftel so that our captain can become King of the Pirates. If… If we need to get a new ship—"

"You do," Kokoro confirmed solemnly.

My hand snapped into a fist, but I forced myself to nod. "Our new ship… it can't be anything run-of-the-mill. 'The best' is a plateau shared by a lot of ships worldwide and it's a valid one, a fine one, sure, but for us… 'the best' just isn't good enough. We need…" I forced myself to suck in a deep, calming breath as I tried to get my thoughts straight. "We need something else entirely. Something unprecedented, something…" I shrugged helplessly. "Something on par with the Oro Jackson herself. The pinnacle of shipbuilding, something that rewrites the entire book. Right here, right now, we need to go beyond the best. We need… we need the awe-inspiring, the unique… we need the ultimate."

Kokoro stared at me. Then she turned to stare at Luffy. Tears still flooded the rubber man's eyes, but his usual grit was back. Finally, she heaved a sigh as she tilted the brim of her hat down. "This damn company is either blessed or cursed, and I can't tell which…" she muttered to herself before giving us all a serious look. "Wait here." With that, she promptly jumped back to the station and headed inside.

As soon as the door closed, I looked back at the crew, to see several questioning looks. I rolled my eyes before figuring out how to respond. "When Tom was still alive, he was the head of a company known as Tom's Workers. It was a small company, with only three people in it besides him: his two apprentices, and his secretary. Take a wild guess as to who said secretary was and is."

Even Luffy gained a look of understanding.

"At a guess, she'll be directing us to his apprentices to make us a new ship?" Robin divined.

"Bingo," I nodded in solemn agreement. "If anyone can make a ship worthy of succeeding Merry, then it's Franky and Iceburg. Of course…" I allowed myself a weak but still cheeky smile. "The real challenge will be getting them to cooperate, considering that they're… well, not as bad as Zoro and Sanji, but not too far off."

Everyone's faces immediately fell at that.

"We're doomed," Usopp sighed morosely.

"Hey, hey, I said they're not as bad as those two dipshits! After all…" I grinned slightly. "At the end of the day, beneath all the bullshit, they consider each other best friends."

"So, basically, not anything like us at all," Sanji deadpanned.

"Not even remotely," Zoro confirmed in an equally flat tone.

"Geeze, Cross, are you an idiot or something?" Luffy asked curiously.

"Now, now, remember, guys: you haven't seen everything I've seen," I said, before allowing my smile to grow dangerously smug as the word 'yaoi' flashed through my mind. "In fact, I've seen a lot of evidence that—MMPH?!"

"I'm sorry, Cross, but considering that you had that look on your face when you were about to insult Whitebeard, I have no doubt that this is for your own good," Robin said sweetly.

"SPOILSPORT!" Soundbite raged as I tried to wrench the flowery limb away from my mouth.

"Nagagagaga! Just like the Straw Hats, bouncing back from tragedy as easily as rubber."

All eyes turned back to the station, where Kokoro had readopted her typical wide smile. She leaped back onto the Merry, and held out her hands. One held not one, but two envelopes and the other had a few blank pieces of paper.

"These letters are addressed to Iceburg, mayor of Water 7, and Franky, head of Water 7's underworld. The two of them are the best shipwrights you'll ever find, and I go way back with both of them. Give them these messages, and they'll build you a ship worthy of the Pirate King. And bring some money with you when you go to see them too, at least to show that you're good for it! My word will get you in the door, but shipbuilding's still an expensive business, no matter who's in your corner!" She grinned at Luffy. "Between you and me, I met Roger way back when. And you're a lot like him; I wouldn't write up letters like this for just anyone."

That, above all else, managed to alleviate the depression among the crew, as Luffy smiled like the sun. "Shishishi! Thanks a lot, Granny!"

"Nagagagaga, don't mention it," Kokoro said, waving us off before snapping up a finger. "But! Know that my help doesn't come free! I want something in return." She paused for effect, then held out the blank papers with her iconic grin. "Autographs from the world's first radio stars, one copy for Chimney, one for Gonbe, and one for me."

I eyed the rest of the papers she was holding. "And the extras?"

Kokoro's grin widened impishly. "Rainy day fund! I bet that the future Pirate King's autograph is gonna be worth something one day!"

Nami promptly adopted an aghast expression and slapped a hand to her forehead. "Why didn't I think of that?!"

That particular statement drew a load of unbidden chuckles from us, and that alleviated a lot of the remaining tension.

A few flourishes with ink later—which involved Carue demonstrating that even royal ducks knew calligraphy, Soundbite deciding to make his bite marks his signature, the Dugongs sketching their weapons, and Lassoo and Su leaving pawprints—Kokoro had her stack of sheets.

"Nagagaga! Well, it looks like I'm all set for this Christmas!" Kokoro chuckled as she looked over the papers before shooting us a salute. "Thanks a lot, you all! Happy travels and the best of luck! I'll see you again in a couple of days!" And with that, she prepared to jump off.

"Hey, hold on a sec, Granny," I said hastily as a thought occurred to me. "Let me get you a little something extra for all of this. Conis, do you have any of those pictures left?"

A grin instantly stretched over the angel's face as she started rummaging through her pockets. "Yes, I do," she said, drawing out a familiar piece of paper and flicking it to the stationmaster. "Here, Granny Kokoro. This is a picture of the tyrant Eneru when he fought Luffy."

Kokoro took one look at the picture of Luffy kicking Eneru in the gut and fell onto her back, laughing her head off. We all stole a glance at the picture as well, and the resulting laughter helped to lighten the mood even more.

After that, we set out from the switch station, following the sea-train tracks towards the metropolis waiting for us relatively close by. With the mood somewhat more upbeat, I was content to let myself stare off into the distance without a care in the world. But of course, that couldn't last long.

"So, Cross…" Su said as she leaped up onto the railing, giving me a curious glance. "Anything you want to tell us about what's coming up next, or would you rather we all be taken by surprise?"

"You mean besides the run-of-the-mill madness and craziness?" I said, smirking wryly before shrugging and turning around to look at my friends. "But, ah, seriously, if the Captain's alright with it…?"

Luffy started to say something, only for Nami and Zoro to grab his cheeks and yank. "Ah… How much do you think you need to tell us, Cross?" he asked through his stretched mouth.

"Not much, Luffy, just a warning about one group that could be the difference between us making them our friends or our enemies," I reassured him.

Luffy blinked thoughtfully for a second before shrugging. "Alright, that's fine, then." And with that, our first and second mates let his mouth snap back into place.

"Good boy," Nami deadpanned.

"Great!' I clapped my hands together and rubbed them eagerly. "So! To start, like Kokoro said, Franky is the head of Water 7's underworld, pretty much the quirkiest and most likable mafia boss you'll ever meet if you can even call them a proper mafia. Odds are that he and his followers, a group of semi-organized—!" I hesitated slightly as I considered things. "Ah, make that quarter-organized—!" I thought a little harder on the matter. "Ah… anyway, hopefully he and the band of thugs called the Franky Family have a high opinion of us from the SBS. But on the off chance that they don't… well, just try to avoid anyone wearing black with pink stars and odd goggles. The Franky Family makes their living off of hunting bounties and dismantling ships, so if they don't like us? They'll only see beri signs."

"You think we can't handle a bunch of thugs, Cross?" Boss said, sounding offended by the implication.

"Nonono, 'handling them' is the exact problem here!" I waved my hands in a panic. "They may be pushovers compared to us, but Franky isn't, and he's easily as protective of his own as we are. If we harm his family, he's going to want revenge, and considering how we need his help if we want Merry's successor to have even half a chance at surviving the true maritime hell that's coming, having him as our enemy is the last thing we need."

"Alright, pink stars and weird goggles, got it," Sanji nodded in understanding. "And what about Iceburg, anything to worry about on his end?"

"Oh, Horus, no, he's known and beloved by everyone on the island. He can be a bit odd at times, sure, but he's a perfect saint," Vivi said.

I looked at her in surprise. "You met him?"

"We stopped by Water 7 on the way to and from the Reverie, and Iceburg always greeted us," Vivi explained with a casual shrug. "It wasn't for long, mind you, just a confirmation that our needs were met, but the impression I got from him and literally anyone on the island that we asked was that it was impossible to dislike the man." She then frowned as a thought struck her. "Unless you know otherwise?"

"Oh, no, no," I denied hastily. "That's pretty much him in a nutshell: one of the best people you'll ever meet, and honestly, I can't be sure if that oddness he shows is real or just obfuscating stupidity."

"Obfuscating? Interesting choice of words, Cross," Robin remarked.

"I didn't come up with the term, Robin. But, yeah, it'll be easy to find him, and odds are that Kokoro's recommendation, however sloppily written, will be all that we'll need," I reassured him, before turning around and heading towards Merry's storage room. "Anyways, that's the only warning the general crew's got to worry about for now. Zoro, Nami, Vivi, I've got a bit more to tell you guys."

"So you mean you're not even trying to be subtle about the fact that you're hiding stuff from us now!?" Usopp sputtered.

"Eeyup!" Soundbite and I chorused as I courteously opened the door for Vivi, who curtsied exaggeratedly in thanks.

"Boss, you and your students try to ease Merry along as much as you can; make sure we stay by the tracks," Nami offhandedly ordered before she and Zoro entered as well.

"I do not agree with this arrangement!" Usopp shouted desperately.

"AGREED!" the TDWS chorused.

"Your concerns are duly noted," I said to them with a cheeky grin before pulling the door shut.

Soundbite needed no prompting to deploy the Gastro-Scramble as the door closed. I was silent for a moment before rapping my fist against my forehead with an angry sigh. "You know, all snark aside, the only reason I'm not telling them this is that I can't trust anyone but you guys to act natural under this sort of pressure."

"That bad, huh?" Zoro asked.

"Worse. Tell me, Vivi… have you ever heard of the Cipher Pols?"

The princess stiffened. "They're… meant to be the World Government's primary intelligence-gathering organizations, highly covert and highly deadly." Her face paled as she connected the dots. "T-They're on Water 7?! That's not good, not good at all! Which one is it? Six? Three? One?"

I bowed my head grimly. "If only… it's number Nine."

The blood promptly drained from my female friends' faces, while Zoro merely stiffened.

"The assassins that kill anyone that the World Government deems a threat? That organization actually exists?" Nami demanded.

"You have to be mistaken, please tell me you're mistaken!" Vivi whimpered miserably.

I shook my head in denial. "Sorry to confirm your worst nightmares, but the boogeymen known as CP9 are all too real. Their base of operations is the Government's judicial island, Enies Lobby, and they're the original masters of the Six Powers. These guys aren't just assassins; they're full-blown living weapons. Four of the agents are undercover in the city and have been for the last five years. And our arrival? It's going to be the trigger for them to break cover and finish their mission."

"And what mission would that be, Cross?" Zoro asked sternly.

I winced. This was not going to go over well. "Water 7 has been the global center of shipwrighting for centuries. Even stretching all the way back to the Blank Century. Since then, it has been home to a very, very specific heirloom that has been passed down from master to apprentice for generations. An heirloom which, in the wrong hands, could change the face of the world. This selfsame heirloom is what the agents have been subtly scouring the island to find for almost half a decade."

Soundbite swallowed heavily as he eyed me nervously. "W-What is IT?"

I reached up and tipped the brim of my hat down so that it shadowed my eyes. "The blueprints for the most powerful battleship ever conceived, which has devastated innumerable lives over the years without ever seeing the light of day: Pluton."

Soundbite, Nami, and even Zoro paled, as I thought they might, but Vivi…

Vivi's expression practically warped, morphing into a twisted combination of both horrified, bloodless apprehension and complete and utter outrage. "That fucking weapon…" she hissed.

"Don't worry, don't worry," I raised my hands placatingly. "The blueprints will burn before we're done and only one key to that thing will be left in existence, and it'll be well out of anyone's reach. Barring any completely unforeseen circumstances, Pluton will never bother us again, alright?"

"And what's the other—?!" Vivi began, before falling silent as she noticed my thumb pointing over my shoulder at the door. "…ah. And you're sure—?"

"Ohara burned because of the damn Weapons. Trust me, she hates having that knowledge in her head as much as you do," I informed her. "But… that's not to say that nothing can make her use it. That's the biggest risk we're going to have on Water 7. CP9 was in charge of destroying Ohara with a Buster Call. And now, their chief has either been granted the authority to activate another one or he's stolen it for himself. In the end, it doesn't really matter: that call goes out, the island it went out on burns. And if Robin finds out about that…"

"She'll run for the hills because she thinks we're not strong enough to stop it…" Nami divined soberly, which got a grimace out of me in return.

"Worse than that: because she thinks we're not strong enough to stop it, she'll turn herself over to certain death in a misguided attempt to try and save the rest of us. And if that happens, there will only be one course of action we can take to save her. And epic though it would be, I think I speak for all of us when I say I'd rather avoid having to storm Enies Lobby." I allowed myself to relax a bit as a grin that was equal parts goofy and eager stretched across my face. "No matter how fun or cathartic it might be…"

Vivi allowed a slight line of drool to slide out of her mouth as she stared at nothing. "Yeah… seeing a whole Government island burn would be pretty awesome…" she mused before hastily shaking her head. "But, ah, no, I think we'd rather avoid that if possible. So, what are we supposed to do?"

"Chopper and Sanji will be assigned to watch Robin like hawks, and the five of us will need to avoid the four agents as much as possible: Kalifa, Iceburg's secretary; Blueno, a bartender with his hair done up in ox horns, close friend of a lot of people on the island; Kaku, a shipwright with a nose like Usopp's but square instead of round, very well-respected; and above all, Rob Lucci, a stern-faced shipwright who only speaks through ventriloquism with his pigeon, also well-respected." I sharpened my glare. "I cannot stress this enough: even if worse comes to worst, no matter what happens, no matter what… do not, do not challenge Rob Lucci unless you want to die."

"Is he really that bad, Cross?" Zoro asked with a hint of eagerness. I responded by leveling a chilling glare at him.

"Don't even think about it, Zoro. Luffy is the only one who has even the remotest of remote chances at beating him, and even then, it was a close thing; he was pushed to and far past his limits, to the point that after he dealt the finishing blow, he barely had enough energy left to speak, much less stand. Rob Lucci is the one person I know of that can be considered Luffy's equal, because he doesn't use weapons, trickery, or any sort of special abilities to warp the fight. All he has and all he needs is brute force, amplified by the Six Powers and the Cat-Cat Fruit, Model: Leopard."

Zoro grimaced ferociously, and I had the distinct impression that he was thinking something in the vein of 'I need more training.'

"'Sides, if things do go south, you'll be getting your fill through Kaku. He's a real swordsman; some Devil Fruit bullshittery, but apart from that, a worthy challenge. Satisfied?"

Zoro's feral grin was all that I needed to see.

"So, avoid those four as much as possible if we want to stay alive, easy enough. Anything else that we need to know?" Nami asked.

"Ah, let's see…" I started counting down on my fingers. "Well, Kaku and Kalifa don't have powers yet, their fruits are waiting at Enies Lobby, so that's a bullet dodged. But Blueno ate the Door-Door Fruit, which lets him turn anything he touches into a door. Extremely useful for assassinations. Besides that…"

I did a quick mental review, and then my eyes widened. "Actually, there is one more thing, though more annoying than dangerous. Iceburg's right-hand shipwright, a cigar-smoker with enough ropes up his sleeve to build a house out of them named Paulie, might try to take some of our money to pay off his loan sharks. Again, the SBS has probably removed that particular worry, but that much money can still make people a bit stupid, so just FYI."

"If he does try that, he'll wish he hadn't," Nami snarled fervently before marching to the door. "Alright, if that's all, I'd better get back to navigating."

"Right, right, go ahead," I said, waving my hand casually before reaching for my bag. "And as for me, I'm going to do my best to fend off depression and kill a few hours the only way I know how. Try tuning in, this is gonna be fun." I glanced at Soundbite. "Ring up Apoo. If ever there was a good time to start things off with him, this would be the one."

-o-

Boa Marigold hissed slightly as she rolled her shoulder, listening attentively as her joints popped in preparation. "Alright, sisters, what do you suggest we improve on today?"

"It better not be tail-lifts again," Sandersonia groused as she stretched her hamstrings. "I swear that we've done it for the past three sessions."

"What's wrong, Sonia?" Hancock chuckled as she bandaged her… assets. "Unable to stand the pain needed to afford the gain?"

The green-haired amazon hissed irritably as she shot her sister a stinkeye. "First, I'm taller than both of you; second, I don't have muscles like cables like Mari; and third, you don't have to deal with phantom pains coming from your nonexistent tail when you're human, so you have no right to criticize me! Got it!?"

Hancock and Marigold exchanged looks before smiling, causing the tallest of the three to break out in a cold sweat.

"Alright, then, that's fair," Marigold smirked, fangs flashing in her mouth as she slowly grew to tower above her. "Then, in that case, whatever shall we do instead?"

"Oh, a thought occurs…" Hancock purred as the air started to shimmer around her. "It has been ever so long… perhaps we shall work on our dear sister's resistance to Conqueror's Haki in the middle of live combat instead?"

"Like I was saying, you can never have enough practice with tail-lifts!" Sandersonia yelped as she snapped into her hybrid form and shot into the abandoned stands of Amazon Lily's arena, cowering in terror from the sadists she called sisters.

On a day like any other, between the Kuja Pirates' raids from island to island, the Gorgon Sisters were honing their skills away from the prying eyes of the rest of the tribe. It wasn't so much that they minded others watching—there was nothing Hancock loved more than an adoring audience—as it was that training was easier when they didn't have to pull their punches to avoid incurring any clothing damage. As such, whenever the Gorgons trained, the rest of the tribe granted them as much privacy as they did when they were bathing.

Or at least, that was the case, up until that very training session. As Sandersonia straightened from the stands, movement from one of the entrances caught her eyes. In a flash of green, the anaconda-woman dove across the stands, snapped her tail into the corridor—

"GAH!"

—and hissed irritably as she withdrew a struggling Kuja warrior from the shadows, wrapped up in her coils. "Looks like we've got a little rat sneaking around, sisters…" she bit out. Marigold and Hancock instantly snapped out of their amusement, and in short order, the squirming amazon found herself looking at the distinctly angry faces of the island's three strongest warriors.

"I do believe I recognize her…" Marigold hummed as she twisted around her sister both to get a better look at the interloper and increase the fear factor. "Marguerite, one of my higher-level students. Quite skilled in her Armament."

"Looks like you'll need to start looking for a new favorite," Sandersonia growled as she started flexing her coils.

"Ah, n-no, wait, please, I-I'm sorry!" Marguerite pleaded as she stared at the sister's leering fangs in terror.

"Hold it, Mari, Sonia," Hancock cut in with an impassive tone and expression. "She hasn't done anything wrong yet. Let her go so that she may explain herself."

The snake-hybrids shot shocked looks at their sister. "Who are you and what have you done with Hancock?" they chorused in unison.

The Pirate Empress scowled in annoyance. "Would you mind not acting quite so surprised!? I don't actually only listen to every other word Princess Nefertari says, you know!"

The two serpents, if anything, only looked more incredulous. They then looked panicked when it felt like the weight of the world slammed down on them, a vein on Hancock's forehead prominently displayed. "Proof enough?"

The snake-women promptly snapped back into their human forms and bowed their heads to the ground. "We apologize for our disrespect, dearest sister!"

Hancock sniffed imperiously as she stared down at the two of them. "I shall consider accepting your apologies at a later date. For now, however…" The Snake Princess strode up to the still-shell-shocked Kuja warrior, causing her to flinch back in terror—

And then she blushed, all but melting as the impossibly beautiful woman put a finger beneath her chin and slooowly tilted her head up. "I apologize for my sisters' actions… Marguerite, was it? Clearly, they require more experience with the finer points of leadership," Hancock said gently.

"T-That's alright, I-I understand…" Marguerite only just managed to whisper out.

The two other Gorgon sisters looked halfway between incredulous and outraged; if it wasn't enough that Hancock had the gall to insinuate that she was better with her subjects than them, it seemed like it was actually true in this case! What was the world coming to?!

"When did we become the bad guys?!" Marigold hissed out of the corner of her mouth.

"Now will you listen to me when I say we need to find the other Snake-Snake Fruit users and unionize!?" Sandersonia shot back.

"I'm certainly considering it now."

"Even so," Hancock continued, her smile fading slightly. "All my sisters and I ask is that you and your comrades stay out of the arena when we train for your own protection. After all…" She turned around and moved her hair to the side, causing Marguerite to shiver in terror as she gazed at the scant few strips of cloth that separated her from being turned to stone. "You know that to gaze upon the eyes is certain death. So, why did you disobey?"

Marguerite had tears in her eyes as she faced the disappointment in the Pirate Empress' eyes. It seemed likely that she would have bowed her head in shame were it not for Hancock's finger holding it up. "I… I w-wanted to talk… to the three of you in p-private. And th-this seemed like the best chance," she stammered.

All three of the sisters seemed curious upon hearing the answer. Slowly, Hancock withdrew from her, looking with an unsmiling but not unkind expression upon the Kuja.

"In the future, the best way to do that would be to put forth a request for a private audience. But as we're already here, what did you want to talk to us about?

"I… well…" Marguerite swallowed heavily as she got her thoughts in order. "E-Ever since the Straw Hat Pirates began broadcasting their adventures via the SBS, I have learned… so much about the world of men. The existence of Sky Islands, the extent of power of the World Government—" She allowed herself to quirk up a slight smile. "Their… shall we say, unique ways of thinking and acting…" Her expression hastily sobered up again. "But… one of the most important things I've learned is how they fight. Their… Their unique abilities." Marguerite bit her lip and looked away uncomfortably. "Their... Their unique abilities that allow them to break the laws of physics, that allow them to… to transform into animals…" She swallowed heavily, trying to steel her nerves. "These… These abilities… Cross explained that they came from… from Devil Fruits…"

Due to being distracted by her emotions, Marguerite was entirely unaware of the tension that had come over the sisters, or of the fact that the Snake-Zoans were slowly rising to tower behind her.

Marguerite bowed her head and kicked meekly at the ground. "H-Honorable sisters, know that I truly respect none more so than you and that I would never mean any disrespect, b-but…" She shook her head firmly. "I-I'm sorry, but considering what I know, I-I just can't deny what I suspect."

"And what do you suspect, warrior?" Hancock ordered more than asked. Gone was any trace of compassion or mercy, only a frigid coldness appropriate for an iceberg… or an executioner.

The blonde Kuja shivered as she stared into her Princess's eyes, but she forged on anyway. "H-Honorable sisters… do… do you… have… Devil Fruit powers?"

Hancock's expression promptly flashed into a mask of rage as she snapped her fingers.

WHOOSH! CRACK!

"YEARGH!"

The instant the sound rang out, both Sonia and Mari lashed out with their serpentine bodies, coiling around Marguerite and all but crushing her with their tails. As it was, the force of the assault was enough to snap over a dozen bones at once.

The panicked warrior coughed up a mouthful of blood as she tried desperately to draw air. "Y-Your highness, p-please, mer—GRK!"

"Quiet," Hancock snarled as she crushed Marguerite's throat beneath her fingers before relaxing her grip just enough to allow her a minimal flow of oxygen. "How many others know?"

"I… m-my comrade S-Sweet Pea guessed, a-and she started to explain her t-thoughts to my ally Aphelandra… B-BUT!" Marguerite yelped as she noticed Hancock shooting a deadly glance up at her sisters. "W-When I-I realized that she was p-probably right, I d-dissuaded them, convinced them they were wrong. I-I knew that y-you must have a reason that you w-wouldn't tell us, t-that's why I c-came alone! N-Not even my partner Kaa knows!"

The Gorgon Sisters exchanged looks. Hancock, in particular, looked marginally less upset and even contemplative. Ultimately, however, she pinned Marguerite with a pitiless stare. "You have my thanks, Marguerite."

The warrior blinked at her in confusion…

SNRK!

"GYAGH!" Marguerite screamed in agony as the serpent-women's coils tightened further, ignoring what little Haki she'd erected.

"Your discretion means that we won't have to harm anyone else to maintain our privacy."

"P-Princess…" Marguerite wheezed.

"Such an intelligent warrior…" Marigold growled as she circled her captive. "Such a shame that her foolishness led to her suffering such an ignoble death."

"Yesss," Sandersonia hissed in agreement as she followed her sister. "If only she hadn't slipped while feeding my dear Bacura. She might have even been a member of the crew one day." She unhinged her jaws and flashed her fangs in a vicious leer. "Oh, well!"

And with that, the sisters lashed down—

"Don don don don!"

—before freezing as the Transponder Snail the Boas had brought with them started ringing.

Sonia snapped her mouth shut and crossed her arms with an irritated hiss. "Why am I even surprised, his sense of timing is always like this," she grumbled.

"It would appear that you get to live a little longer, Marguerite," Marigold muttered, though she only loosened enough to grant the Kuja half a breath. "Considering the Straw Hats' typical integrity, I for one find it would be in… bad taste to do something so unsavory during the SBS, regardless of the necessity."

Hancock sniffed as she brought up the snail. "I suppose there's no harm in waiting a few minutes or hours; she's not going anywhere." With nary another thought to their captive, she picked up the snail's microphone, causing it to awaken with a very familiar shit-eating grin.

"Nine Seakings, ten seakings! Aaand that's all we're waiting for! Hello, ladies and gentlemen of this fine and fucked up world we live in, my name is Jeremiah Cross and with me is my co-host—!"

"The unmistakable AND UNFORGETTABLE SOUNDBITE!"

"Indeed, and it is my honor to tell you all that—!"

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!

Cross's proclamation was cut off by a rapping noise coming from his end.

"Eh? The heck?" There came the creaky noise of a door opening. "Leo? What do you want?"

"Oh, nothing in particular, I just wanted to tell you that it's time to start the SBS."

"Oh, well, that's just fine, then, thanks for telling me!" And with that, the door shut. "Now, where was I… oh, right, it's time to start the—HEY, WAIT A SECOND! DAMN IT, LEO, WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU BEING ONE OF THE SERIOUS ONES!?"

"TRAITOR!" Soundbite roared in agreement.

"How is it that despite knowing that it's coming every time, that joke never stops being funny?" Sonia snickered.

"Some things are just sacred like that…" Marigold sighed wistfully.

"… grrggh! BAH! Screw it! The universe might be against me, but I'm not going to stop trying! I'm going to manage to start this thing again if it's the last thing I do!"

"AND I'M going to stop you again IF IT'S THE LAST THING THAT I DO!"