Chapter 35 - Long Ring Long Land Pt 2 2/2

She tried to stay emotionless for a bit, she really did, but ultimately, my words were the breaking point; she bowed her head, not willing to look at any of us, and I swear I saw something sparkling from her face drip into the tub below her. "… No," she breathed at last, hugging herself miserably. "But what else would you have me do? This crew… this is the first place that I've actually felt secure since… since…" She bit down on her lip before she could say anything further.

"Seriously, Robin? Even after all this, after all we've gone through, you can't bring yourself to tell them?" I asked, unable to keep the hurt out of my voice.

Slowly, she looked up, tears actually shimmering in her eyes. "No, I can't… Because I can't deny what Aokiji said. We… you're all strong, incredibly so… but not strong enough to fight the world." She looked away miserably. "Nobody is…"

"At the risk of Sanji kicking me, that's a steaming load of bull," Mikey announced hotly.

The cook took a deep draw from his cigarette before snorting it out. "I never thought I'd agree with anyone insulting a woman in any form, but I agree with the dugong," he stated. "You're the only one here who believes that, Robin dear."

"…How can you say that, Sanji?" she shook her head miserably. "What just happened with Aokiji—"

"Is only going to help us," Zoro cut in sharply. "We lost, and none of us are happy about that, but we survived. We've seen what we're up against, now we just need to get to the point that when we meet him again, we won't lose."

"And unless shit somehow goes sideways in a manner most spectacular sometime soon, we won't have to face anyone we can't beat with no way out except their mercy again, Robin," I said carefully, looking at Luffy the whole time… though his head was still bowed, preventing anyone from reading his expressions.

"You can't—" Robin began.

"Do you really think that I'm lying?" I interrupted.

"I—no, but you don't know—" she stammered.

"Do you really think that our captain, Monkey D. Luffy, will ever let any of us down?" I pressed, quietly but intensely.

There was a minor spark of recognition in Robin's eyes and she perked up ever so slightly, looking at me, and then at Luffy. He looked up slightly, revealing one of his eyes, and Ace couldn't have had more of a fire burning in his than Luffy's had at that moment. Robin looked at him for what felt like an eternity before slowly looking away, shame on her face.

"…I want to say that I believe…" she whispered, clutching tightly at her arms. "But after all these years—"

"Cross."

Robin cut herself off, and we both looked back at Luffy. He looked like he had a bad taste in his mouth, but his eyes still burned. "I'm… changing my orders," he grit out uncomfortably. "From now on, you have my permission to say anything you know—" He shuddered heavily at the words before forging onwards. "But only if it can help us get stronger, that's it!"

I gaped, and most of the rest of the crew seemed equally stunned, but Luffy just looked at Robin, a wry grin slowly growing on his face. "After all, if we're going to take on the whole world, then we're going to need to be a lot stronger, right?"

I glanced at Robin for a second before looking back at Luffy. "Yeah, that'd be for the best. I mean, so long as we fight like hell we'll get through what's coming up next…" I trailed off for a second before nodding firmly. "But yeah, I'd be a lot more comfortable if we took what little time we have here on Long Ring Long to hone our skills."

"Training whenever you can DOES HURT!" Soundbite piped up. "HURTS THEM, ANYWAYS!"

"Well, I'm all for it. If I know what to shoot for, I should be able to reach it faster," Zoro grinned widely.

"My students and I train on a regular basis anyways, so we'll just have to train twice as hard, right boys?" Boss said confidently, pounding his 'fist' into his 'palm'.

"BOSS, YES, BOSS!" the dugongs barked as they snapped to attention.

"I don't plan on letting another lady get injured in my sight. I'll be glad to train," Sanji said firmly.

"Count me in, too," Chopper nodded in agreement.

"I could definitely use a chance to get used to wielding my arsenal now that I have the chance," Conis mused to herself.

Everyone else responded in the same vein, some speaking, others only nodding, but absolutely none opposed to the idea. I turned back to Robin and promptly felt a pang of sympathy at the sheer degree of shock she displayed. For anyone to be so taken aback at the idea that anyone would be willing to risk their lives for them… it was moments like this that I was really grateful for the transceiver hanging at my side.

Still, my sorrow and rage were promptly washed away by what Robin did next: she smiled. An honest, true smile. It was weak and frail, but that wasn't important to me. No, what was truly important was that the spark of life that I'd seen extinguished earlier was back in her eyes; not as strong as before, unfortunately, but there nonetheless.

Bolstered by her reaction, I nodded and clapped my hands. "Right! Everyone who isn't still recovering from hyper-hypothermia, meet me on the deck in ten minutes. I'm going to need that long to make sure I don't forget anything. Oh, and!" I hastily stuck my finger up, causing everyone to pause before shooting apologetic looks at Robin, Conis and the dugongs. "For the record, I do apologize for my cryptic nigh-savant-like bullshittery. But! I promise that once everything is said and done on the next island we arrive on, I will let you all in on the secrets I hold. Agreed?"

Conis and Su exchanged glances for a moment before the angel nodded firmly. "You saved my home with whatever knowledge you have, Cross. I'm perfectly willing to wait as long as I need to learn it."

"Speak for yourself!" Su sniffed. "You'd better talk soon and fast, bub, or else I'll snatch slimeball and make him tell me!"

"JUST TRY IT, puff-BALL!" Soundbite shot back.

Boss puffed out a cloud of smoke as he held up his flippers in a placating gesture. "Hey, doesn't matter to me either way. In the end, I am and always have been a soldier, and you are my superior." He jabbed his cigar at me. "Until you do something suicidally stupid, my boys and I will listen to you no matter what."

The TDWS nodded in agreement, though Mikey was noticeably reluctant.

"Sooo… we don't get a vote in asking for spoilers early, then?" SMACK! "OW! I was just asking, geeze!"

"Well, if we've got ten minutes, I'll go ahead and double-check the upgrades I've finished up," Usopp muttered, seeming somewhat subdued. I frowned as he left, suddenly remembering that while Merry had been one catalyst that drove him to leave the crew, she hadn't been the only one; there had been two, and his rock-bottom self-esteem from meeting Aokiji was the other. I needed to nip that in the bud once I got the chance, or else we might be looking at a shitton of trouble anyways.

Vivi and Carue left the room next, and everyone else followed soon after, Chopper lingering the longest to make sure the water was still well-suited for Robin. Soon, only Luffy and I were left.

"Robin…" I glanced at Luffy for a moment before giving her a compassionate look. "I'm ready to back you up on… that whenever you are."

She clenched her eyes shut with a shudder and held the position for a moment before giving me a light smile. "… I'm still not certain… but I…" She nodded hesitantly, the action slowly picking up strength. "For the first time in I don't know how—" Robin choked off as she shook her head with a dry chuckle. "Lying again and you no doubt know it… for the first time in twenty years I have hope again…" She graced me with a tearful smile. "And it's all thanks to you. You have my thanks, Mis—" Robin flinched and smiled apologetically. "Cross."

I smiled back and clenched her shoulder reassuringly. "We'll get through this, Robin, don't worry. Now, here." I picked up a vial Chopper had left behind and handed it to her. "Take your medicine and get some rest. We'll wake you up around dinner time, alright?"

Robin chuckled as she took the vial and downed it. "Knowing Sanji, you didn't even…" she trailed off into a yawn. "Even need… to…" She blinked blearily at the vial. "Huh… it would… appear that Chopper… improved his formula… recently…" I caught the vial as she nodded off and sank a few inches into the water.

I watched her sleep soundly for a moment before hanging my head with a groan. "Damn it, Robin…" I ground out miserably.

"Eh? What's wrong?" Luffy asked in surprise. "Robin's happy again, isn't that a good thing?"

I shook my head miserably. "That's what she said, Luffy, and I want to believe her, I want to so bad it hurts…" I shrugged in defeat. "But the fact of the matter is that Robin is a world-class actor, and I honestly can't tell whether or not she was faking those emotions, because I know damn well that she is fully capable of it."

"You had better not be saying she doesn't think we're her friends, Cross," Luffy growled.

"No, Luffy, not at all," I shook my head solemnly. "In fact, that's the only thing I'm completely certain of at the moment."

"Then we should trust her! It's what friends do!" Luffy nodded as though that were that.

I, on the other hand, bowed my head. "Captain… that's the exact reason why we can't trust her."

"Eh!?"

I gestured between him and myself. "We're her friends, Luffy, her friends who she cares about more than life itself." I pointed at him sadly. "You should know better than anyone that people, even people as smart as her, tend to do stupid, stupid, stupid things, so long as it ends with saving their friends… or their family, as the case may be."

Luffy's expression darkened like a thundercloud, but in the end, he just didn't have an answer to that.

-o-

Several minutes of me racking my brains for everything that I could instruct the crew on at this point—which involved no small amount of grumbling (read: violent cursing) at Ace for the 'instructions' on Haki he gave—found me stepping out onto the deck. Everyone's attention turned to me immediately.

"Alright, guys, let's get started." I clapped my hands together and rubbed them eagerly. "To start things off, let me give you all a fair warning: while I've seen and heard of a lot of techniques, which I will be sharing with you, the thing is that I don't know how to do most of them. But if you guys could figure it out on your own, then I know that you can figure it out via description, even if it'll no doubt take longer without the on-hand experience."

I looked at Usopp first, noticing him standing beside… something, covered with a tablecloth. "Usopp, full status report on upgrades."

The sniper nodded. "I've almost finished Nami's Perfect Clima-Tact, but I'm still having trouble with making the Eisen Dial work down here. You're sure that there's a way to make it happen?"

"Positive. But if you're still having trouble making it flow… Nami, you're the expert on clouds, think you can see if you can figure out what he has to do?"

Nami nodded, and Usopp continued. "Well, alright, then… In other news, I've almost finished upgrading my slingshot and arsenal. Boss—" He looked at the Dugongs. "I've finished the Thermal Dart, but I haven't worked out a way for you to have a safe place to grab it yet. So, I'm either going to need an indeterminate amount of design time to fix that, or I'm going to need to make heat-retardant gauntlets for you."

Boss snorted and waved his flipper dismissively. "Please. A little bit of heat doesn't scare me, I can take it on the chin like a man."

"Uh… Boss?" Conis cut in hesitantly with a raised finger. "I'm sorry to tell you this, but Heat Dials are capable of reaching temperatures of up to and over 700 degrees Celsius. You could seriously injure your flippers if you used that weapon unprotected!"

Boss cocked an eyebrow at Conis before plucking his cigar from his mouth and grinding it down in his free palm without even a hint of either hesitation or a wince. "I have spent over three-quarters of my life smashing my flippers into the bedrock of the Sandora River and the skulls of every living creature in it. It is a miracle if I ever feel anything with them." He grinned confidently. "Trust me, if anyone can take the heat, it's me."

"…Right. Just make sure that whenever you're not using it, you keep it deactivated, otherwise you're going to be getting a lot more scar-tissue," Usopp finally concluded before nodding at me. "And Cross?" He took hold of the tablecloth covering the table he was near. "Your upgrades are complete." With a triumphant grin, he yanked back the cloth.

I grinned as I took in the sight. He had completely revamped my armor. The color was the same, but ridges covered the backs of them from elbow to finger and knee to toe, and the elbows and knees were thicker than the rest of it, guarding the joints perfectly. The armor as a whole was thicker, too, each piece easily double the size of my limb proper; I could see sleeves of what looked like fabric on the insides of the armor, with the metal part expanded outwards. And in the palms of the gauntlets were two distinctly round shapes, the palms displaying seven-pieced honeycomb-grilles.

"Specially designed from the Usopp Workshop, your new armor comes complete with heat and cold insulation, along with an extra layer of protection and durability composed of sea king leather and the special fibers I use in my ropes. The left one is the Flash Gauntlet, which I've hooked up with that strobe-mechanism you said you liked, and the right one is the Impact Gauntlet, which channels all impacts to the Dial no matter where you catch them, even if they're not on the palm itself. And don't worry, I've worked out all of the bugs this time with Luffy and the dugongs acting as test dummies; just make sure to discharge it outside of the feedback mechanism after every twenty or so blasts, otherwise there's a good chance the buildup of energy will blow your bones clean out your elbow. Also!" He pointed on Conis. "I'm working on a way to build a similar device for the Reject Dial. For now, though, the only one who can use it without breaking their arm—and most likely their body as a whole—is Luffy."

"And he hits about as hard as that thing anyway, so really it's a moot point," I chuckled before pointing at Zoro. "Alright, moving on. You, mister First Mate… I have absolutely no idea how you pulled it off, but you worked out some kind of technique you called Nine Swords Style: Asura. Basically—"

"No, no, I got it," Zoro cut me off with a casual wave of his hand. "I know what you're talking about. I've been meditating on it in my spare time, but now that I know that it's actually possible…" He trailed off into a feral grin that caused my blood to freeze over.

Soundbite shuddered in terror. "Unclean… Unclean…"

I swallowed heavily in agreement before forging on. "A-A-Anyway, while you're working on that, another technique to think on is one of a set known as the Six Powers." I turned slightly so that I was addressing the whole crew. "The Six Powers is a highly advanced martial-arts style that is used almost exclusively by the Marines' top brass, the purpose of which is to essentially turn the human body into a weapon. Thankfully, however, I think that the techniques are simple enough that you can figure them out yourselves.

"The one I'm thinking of at the moment is known as Iron Body. The basics of it, as I understand them, is to clench your body's muscles hard, and I mean really hard, so that your very flesh—" I rapped my knuckles on my abdomen. "Becomes as solid as iron itself, so that not even blades or bullets can hurt you. Well…" I nodded my head to the side. "Unless it's a bullshit-strong attack, but… well, you get my point." I looked back at Zoro. "I figured that you have the most experience out of all of us at blocking near-lethal attacks with your torso, so I figure that you'd have the most luck puzzling it out."

"Makes sense," Zoro nodded in agreement.

"Hey, I've taken twice as many blows as the Marimo!" Sanji protested.

I gave the cook a flat look. "Sanji, you've taken a lot of bad hits, I'll admit, but you sure as hell didn't take Mihawk's ship-cutting slash or Mr. 1's shredding drill head on."

Sanji faltered at that for a moment before grumbling and looking away as he chewed on his cigarette.

"And besides, you'll be focusing on the second, third and fourth of the Six Powers, and I'm honestly going to be surprised if you don't have at least one of them by the time the day is out. And Zoro will never let you hear the end of it besides that, since he's already mastered one of them as far as his fighting style is concerned."

Both Zoro and Sanji looked at me, the former with wicked eagerness and the latter looking about ready to burst into flames of pure determination. I smiled innocently, somehow managing to move all of my cold sweat to the back of my head. I would not show weakness, I would not show weakness!

"Talk fast," Sanji growled viciously.

I most certainly did not swallow heavily. "Well, see, Zoro's able to produce flying slashes with his Phoenix attacks, and the technique known as the Tempest Kick lets you produce them with your legs. All you have to do is kick with enough force and somehow concentrate all the resultant wind from the attack into an amalgamation of pure wind strong and sharp enough to match any blade."

Sanji's determination faded into a contemplative frown. "Hrm… you mean like what the old geezer did with his peg leg back when that huge shield-wearing psycho tried to ignite the Baratie?"

I blinked. "…Huh, I forgot about that. Figures that old coot would have figured that technique out, God only knows how far into the Line he got before turning back. But… yeah, pretty much, just concentrate all of that wind into a singular blade of air and you should acquire a nice ranged attack in your arsenal."

Sanji smirked at Zoro, but grudgingly looked back at me when I snapped my fingers for attention. "Alright, as much as I'd love to start on that one right away, you said there were two more?"

"Yeah. The third technique, you've actually done already, back when Ohm scarred Conis. With the Moonwalk technique, you kick so hard that you can jump on the air itself. Besides using Devil Fruit powers, it's the closest thing you can ever get to actual flight. I don't expect you to get the hang of that one in a hurry, but if you're able to do it while you're berserk…" I shrugged. "If you have to, try channeling that anger so you can figure out how to do it.

"Now, the fourth one," I said, looking around at the whole crew again. "Seems to be the easiest of all the Six Powers with how common it is. A certain ex-pirate in the East Blue by the name of Captain Kuro even developed a half-bastardized, half-improved version of it: the Shave technique. This is the only one that I know the instructions for: by kicking the ground ten times in a second, you can generate enough force to move fast enough that you seem to practically teleport, disappearing. How the hell you manage it, I don't know, but like I said, it seems to be the easiest of them. Heck," I chuckled, looking back at the sniper and navigator. "With how good you are at running, I wouldn't be surprised if you could manage it, Usopp. Or you, Nami."

The two of them looked contemplative, and I turned my attention back to Luffy. "The fifth technique is called Finger Pistol. Essentially, with enough strength and by applying Iron Body to one's finger, just doing this—" I stuck my arm out, index finger pointing outwards. "Oughta be enough to put a hole in a person as well as any gunshot. A bit more visceral than what you're used to, I know, but I just thought it might be a good idea for your pipe. Good way of piercing through particularly strong defenses and all."

Luffy hummed thoughtfully as he tilted his head to the side.

"Now, the last one is another one that you've pulled off, Luffy, during your fight against Eneru. Though…" I waved my hand side-to-side. "The official technique is admittedly more effective than that airhead thing you pulled off. Letting your body go limp and letting your reflexes do all the work dodging is the basis of the Paper Art technique, but the real deal lets you keep your head in the game, so that you can attack or move appropriately."

"Oooh, now that sounds like fun!" Luffy grinned eagerly.

"Alright, now, let's see…" I slowly started ticking down on my fingers as I muttered to myself. "Zoro needs Haki, Nami and Usopp are fine on their own, Sanji…" I glanced at the cook as he swung out a few kicks. "Hey, Sanji, does the phrase 'if God made food, then the Devil made spice' mean anything to you?"

Sanji froze mid-swing, shooting a shocked look at me. "That move actually works!? I came up with it back on the Baratie while I was drunk off my ass and I've never used it because I didn't think it'd actually work!"

I shrugged helplessly. "Yeah, well, somehow it actually does, and to great effect, I might add. Something about your heart burning even hotter than the kick or something?"

Sanji's expression rapidly shifted from surprise to realization and then to thoughtful contemplation.

I shrugged and left him to it in favor of moving on. "Alright then, next up, Chopper!" I pointed at the doctor in question. "Seeing as we're currently in the middle of a verdant wasteland, is there any chance that you'd be willing to try training in order to gain control of 'that'?"

The reindeer stared at me in confusion for a moment before paling visibly, even beneath his fur, fidgeting uncomfortably. "I, ah, don't think that that might be such a good idea, Cross…"

"What? Why not?" I blinked in confusion. "I mean, I suppose the whole hyper-exhaustion thing is a danger, but we've got enough muscle here to easily match you, and all we have to do to break the form is knock you in the ocean."

"Weeeell…" Chopper clicked his hooves together sheepishly… the same way he'd done when he was explaining how he'd developed his little Hyde-issue.

"This is gonna suck, isn't it?" I stated blandly.

"Well, see, the thing is, Cross," he said, rubbing the back of his skull. "'That' was a berserker when I stumbled onto it because it was primarily controlled by my unconscious mind. Back then, my unconscious was totally empty, so it was essentially my baser animal instincts given form, if admittedly more savage than I'd expect. But now…" He tapped his hoof against his temple. "That part of my brain isn't quite so unconscious anymore, remember?"

I stood stock still as the implications sunk in. And said implications were that if things proceeded anywhere even relatively close to canon, there was a non-zero chance of the Tower of Justice becoming a butcher's shop. Or some other unimaginable abomination of SCIENCE!

… On the other hand, maybe Spandam deserved that—NO, no, it wasn't worth it. It very nearly was, so very, very nearly was, but! I had collateral to think of, so much collateral.

"Let's put a pin in that for now, alright?" I squeaked uncomfortably.

Chopper nodded with just as much trepidation. "Probably for the best, yes."

"Moving right along!" I hastily swung around to my next target, and then paused as an idea came to me, prompting me to swing back to Chopper. "Actually, there's still something that you can do. You know about Luffy's Gears, right?"

"Uh…" Chopper blinked in surprise. "You mean that technique that he used to turn huge and punch out the seawall, right? And the one he used to save Conis from Eneru? What about them?"

"The latter is Gear 1.5 and the prior is 2.5, prototype versions of Gears Second and Third," I explained. "Both extremely powerful tools, to be sure, but, well…" I scratched the back of my neck sheepishly. "Well, you remember how the recoil from 2.5 snapped Luffy into a midget?"

Chopper grimaced as he caught on. "I'm guessing that 1.5 has some kind of side-effect as well?" He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Well, I don't know if I can help with anything like the shrinkage, but—"

"Yeeeaaah, see…" My sheepishness redoubled. "That's the thing. Gear Second's side effects are a lot more, shall we say… visceral than Gear Third. How to best put this… Ah, Luffy!" I pointed at our captain. "How do you start 1.5 and how do you usually feel after using it?"

Luffy grinned eagerly as he held his leg up and pointed to it. "Oh, it's easy! I just pump my legs to get my blood flowing faster, and then that makes me go faster too!" He then looked upwards thoughtfully, totally missing the horrified look that had started spreading over Chopper's face. "The bad news is that so far I've only been able to keep it going for a few seconds and after it runs out, I usually feel kinda tired and my muscles ache all over." And then his eager grin was right back in place. "But I've been getting better at using it in my spare time! Some more practice and I'll be able to keep it running for as long as I want! Here." He placed his fist on the deck. "Check it ou—!"

THWACK!

"GRK!" Luffy choked, slapping a hand to the side of his neck. However, before he could do anything further, the syringe that had just stabbed him finished emptying its contents into his bloodstream, causing the rubber-man to keel over and start snoring.

We all stared at Luffy's prone form in shock for a moment before turning our gazes to Chopper, whose hoof was still extended in a throwing follow-through and whose face was a rictus of pure rage. "Unbelievable, inconsiderate, suicidal…!" The human-reindeer's words trailed off into unintelligible grumbling as he marched up to Luffy and grabbed the back of his collar. He then shot a dour glare around the deck. "If you'll excuse me, I'm going retire to the kitchen for a bit so as to guarantee that this ignoramus!" He emphasized the word with a thoroughly ineffective smack to Luffy's temple. "Doesn't keel over at age 50 due to artificial MUSCLE ATROPHY!"

Nobody dared halt the doctor as he marched up the stairs, flung Luffy into the kitchen and slammed the door shut behind him.

Soundbite blinked in surprise before giving me a hesitant glance. "Should we SAVE HIM?"

I shook my head with an exasperated sigh. "No, no, best we leave them be. Luffy might suffer in the short-term, but Chopper is essentially working to save him from, well, himself." I clapped my hands as I decided that it'd be better for my sanity to not dwell on whatever unholy procedures Chopper was performing. "Right then, next up is…" I frowned as I realized who I had turned to. "Vivi. I meant to ask you after we were through with Eneru, but things got kinda hectic so I forgot until now with Aokiji, so I'll ask before I forget: that necklace you're wearing, what—?"

"OH, MY, LOOK AT THE TIME!" Vivi yelped desperately before I could get another word out, sweat cascading down her face as she plastered a very rictus grin on. She then vaulted onto Carue's back and clutched his reins in a white-knuckled grip. "In all the excitement, I almost forgot that I'd been meaning to run some laps with Carue, for practice! Well, no time like the present! Come on, Carue, let's go, once around the island, chop chop!"

"Hey, now, wait a—!"

WHOOSH!

"Minute…" I trailed off slowly as I turned my head to stare after the dust cloud that was fast approaching the horizon. "…Wow."

"DAT DUCK CAN MOVE!" Soundbite whistled in awe.

"Tell me about it…" I grumbled darkly before giving Soundbite a searching glance. "By the way, is there any chance that she—?"

"Sorry, nada." Soundbite shook his head in denial. "Most I've GOTTEN IS THE word 'SIROCCO'… ALTHOUGH…"

I glanced at him curiously. "What?"

"EH…" He nodded his head side to side. "I think that I heard a voice coming from IT? DON'T THINK IT WAS alive, though, so…"

"Huh…" I mulled that over for a second before shaking my head. "Well, either way, if she doesn't want to share, I suppose that's just her prerogative. I'll drop it… for now, anyway." I moved on to Conis. "Alright, now for you, our resident angel of firepower. Given how you've been toting that Burn Bazooka around all day without so much as breaking a sweat, I'm guessing it's safe to assume that you don't find it's weight to be in any way daunting?"

Conis shifted her bazooka around on her back for a moment before nodding confidently. "Yes, that sounds about right. Thanks to all the strength from the extra oxygen, it barely feels like I'm carrying anything."

"Then I say it's high time we change that," I said, smacking my fist into my palm. "Seeing as you can carry that behemoth around no problem, you can easily carry around a bunch of its cousins at the same time. Your goal is to find out just how firepower you can comfortably strap to yourself at once; trust me, if you think talking softly and carrying a big gun equals being a badass, that's easily trumped by being a walking arsenal."

"Can do!" the angel saluted eagerly.

"Su, make sure she doesn't somehow overload and become ineffective."

"I will try, but I make no promises!" Su swiped her tail up to her forehead in a salute.

"Hey!"

"Remember the macaroni incident?"

"YOU SWORE TO NEVER MENTION THAT AGAIN! Though I suppose I do see your point. So much cheese…"

I shuddered slightly as I watched the usually serene woman devolve into a fit of horrified twitching before electing to move along. "And Boss!" I pointed at the martial artist confidently for a moment before slowly lowering my finger. "I… am afraid that I have nothing for you or your students…"

"Eh," Boss shrugged indifferently. "You've given us more than enough to work on already." He pumped his fist with a grin. "We'll just have to do the rest ourselves! Right, boys?"

"AYE, BOSS!" his students concurred.

"Well, then, in that case…" I clapped my hands and nodded. "That's it! Everyone go right ahead and get to it!"

"Hang on a second, Cross," Nami interjected. "Aren't you forgetting someone?"

"Eh?" I blinked at her in confusion. "No, I was just leaving that up to you. I don't have anything to suggest until Usopp's got the Clima-Tact ready, so—"

Nami cut me off by rapping her knuckles on my forehead with a flat look. "I meant you, dumb-dumb. You've told everyone else what they should do to get stronger, but what are you going to do in the meantime?"

I felt a cold sweat begin to drip down my forehead as I suddenly realized I hadn't thought of something for me to do, and that meant someone was going to 'volunteer' me to work with them. And in all honesty, that was likely to end with me in a motherload of pain.

"I-I, uh…" I stammered intelligently.

"Mikey, Donny," Boss thankfully interrupted. "Go help Cross out. Sobek knows he needs it."

"BOSS, YES, BOSS!" both dugongs barked, saluting.

I swallowed nervously at their enthusiasm and promptly shot a pleading look at Usopp. "Please tell me that you managed to finish whatever upgrades you planned to make to my baton."

"Ah…" Usopp hesitated for a moment before nodding nervously. "Maybe yes? Fair warning, I'm not entirely confident about its build, so—!"

"I'm about to fight two Kung-Fu Dugongs, see how much I care!" I growled desperately.

Usopp glanced at the two amphibians, who were tapping their weapons in their palms before shuddering in terror. "Point taken." The sniper-tinkerer drew a metal cylinder out of his bag and tossed it to me. "Just be careful, it's still kind of—!"

I caught the cylinder in mid-air—

ZAP!

And promptly found myself flat on my back, coughing up a hefty cloud of smoke. "Ow…"

"NOT fun!" Soundbite whined.

"…sensitive," Usopp winced sympathetically as he stood over me, scratching the back of his head. "Sorry, those Thunder Dials are really tricky. Guess there are still a few bugs to work out, huh?"

"The appropriate phrase here…" I wheezed out as I shakily extended my arm skyward, my baton held delicately between my fingertips. "Would be 'no doi'."

Usopp took the collapsed weapon back with a pair of insulated pliers he'd pulled from his bag. "I'll just, ah, try and work them out, then, huh?"

"Yeah," I winced as I coughed up another lungful of smoke. "You do that…"

"Nice dance, Cross," Su snickered. "Real fancy footwork!"

"Go get your tail charred off, puff-ball…" I snarled as I slowly crawled to my feet, shaking my head in order to dislodge the stars swirling in it. "So, uh, how are we doing this exactly?"

Donny jabbed a flipper over his shoulder, pointing towards the shore. "This way."

I gave him a shaky thumbs-up. "You got it. Just gimme a bit to get my armor on, I'm going to need all the protection I can get."

"Yeah, sure thing, we'll be waiting," Donny waved his flipper flippantly as he and Mikey leapt over the edge of the ship.

I waited for a moment before shooting a glare at Nami. "You realize that they are going to absolutely tenderize me, right?"

Nami hummed to herself, tapping a finger on her lips. "I suppose I could tell you that this is for your own good. That I care about you, and that I want to see you get stronger so that I don't have to worry about you so much. I could also tell you that I think you can teach those dugongs as much as they teach you, or even that this is a matter of solidarity, with all of us getting steadily stronger and that I don't want you left behind."

I saw this punch line coming a mile away. "Aaaand in reality?"

She patted my shoulder comfortingly as she sported a winning smile. "Try and grow a spine and some thicker skin, you weak-ass piece of putty."

"…Alright, while most of that is par for the course… thicker skin? Don't you think that if there were a way to do that, I'd jump on it?" I asked dryly, holding an arm up at eye-level.

The blood drained from Nami's face as she gaped at my limb before she swallowed heavily. "… Okay, I suppose I could have worded… that…" She trailed off before giving me a flat look. "Considering how you always tell Lassoo that dog insults were fine before he joined the crew, I'm going to take a shot in the dark and say you're screwing with me?"

"Atta girl," I chuckled, slapping her back as I moved past her to where my armor was laid out.

As I pulled on the pieces, I thought about how different it felt. The sleeves fit like… well, like a glove, and the metal on the outside moved just as the sleeves did. It was a bit more comfortable than the last set I had, but I could feel that it was a lot tougher this time, too; the sheer extra weight of the things attested to that. In addition, the Kevlar-grade material on the inside coupled with Usopp's whatever-the-hell metal on the outside made sure that I wouldn't have to worry about any pain getting through the bandages. To cap it all off, the armor was sealed on just as tightly as my previous iteration, with the elbow and knee guards doing an expert job of hiding the unlatching mechanisms.

I rolled my arms and took a few practice steps to re-acclimate myself to the weight of the armor, although it soon became clear that I wasn't so much re-acclimating as I was flat-out acclimating. After all, the difference in size combined with the fact that it was around twice as heavy as the old armor was making this seem less like an upgrade and more like what it actually was: a completely new set of armor that I'd have to grow used to all over again. And it wasn't going to be as easy as I'd hoped, either.

I threw out a few practice punches and swung my leg up so that I could lash out a Spartan Kick.

I grinned in satisfaction.

"Perfect," I announced before glancing over at Usopp, one of my gauntlets held up so that the palm was facing him. "So, how do I…?"

"Hey, don't point it at me, that's the Flash one!" the sniper said, hastily covering his eyes. "But just flexing your palm should be enough. Whole hand, to prevent misfires."

I eyed my left hand—my Flash Gauntlet— for a moment before flipping its palm down and firmly flexing the bottoms of my knuckles. I was extremely happy to see light strobing on the ground. "Ooooh, yeah, this is gonna be useful…" I then glanced over at Lassoo as he chose that moment to get up and shake himself off. "Well, I'm almost completely loaded down anyway. Whaddaya say, Lassoo, wanna help me give them our best?"

The dog-gun yawned jaw-crackingly wide before giving me an apologetic shrug. "Sorry, Cross, no can do." He jerked his head over at Conis. "I've got an appointment with our resident iron-jock-strapped angel here for an upgrade." He leered eagerly, tongues of flame licking out from between his fangs. "I want me a piece of that firepower she was tossing around earlier!"

In spite of the fact that I was going to be left without my heaviest artillery at my back, I couldn't help but chuckle. "Alright, go on, then."

Tail wagging excitedly, he bounded over to Conis, and I exchanged glances with an eager-looking Soundbite before jogging over to the railing and jumping down to the shore. I was very pleased when I found that it didn't hurt in the least.

A few scant feet before me, Donny and Mikey stood on opposite ends of the Merry, the former twirling his staff with quiet but ill-disguised eagerness, and the latter practically bursting with belligerent excitement.

"Alright, then," I nodded as I started walking forward, stretching my arms back and forth as I went. "So, are there any rules here? Any limitations, any holds barred, is there a starting sig—" I cut myself off mid-sentence, leaping forwards and swinging my leg at Mikey.

Said leg was promptly caught by the chains of the nunchuck the dugong snapped taut and held at bay without even a hint of worry from him.

Mikey stared blandly at the sole of my greave for a moment before cocking an eyebrow at me. "Did you honestly expect that to work?"

I shrugged in an innocent manner. "Not really, but I had to try."

"Well, I guess the first lesson is in situational awareness," the dugong replied.

I frowned. "Situational awareness? What—"

"BEHIND!" Soundbite suddenly yelped.

I didn't even need to look to guess what Soundbite was referring to, and most likely any other person would have ducked down to avoid what was coming, but seeing as I wasn't one for conventional solutions, I instead chose to leap forwards, using the chain of Mikey's weapon to vault over him. I'd have gone for a boot to the head in the process, but he rolled under me before I got the chance, leaving me to land in a roll and turn to face my opponents.

"Hmm, not bad," Donny hummed, twirling his bo staff as he landed, Mikey popping up beside him. "You and Soundbite really do form a good team. Okay, we'll do this the normal way."

Both dugongs snapped their weapons up into ready stances, a palpable aura of menace rising around them.

"Defend yourself."

"GASTRO-FLASH!" I immediately shouted, pointing the Flash Gauntlet in front of me, Soundbite chiming in with an ear-piercing shriek. Mikey stumbled and fell to the ground with a cry of pain while Donny kept going. Apparently one of them had the foresight to plug their shells with wax.

I threw up an arm to block the bo staff as it descended, then hastily moved my other arm up when the dugong seamlessly moved into another strike. And then another strike came and was blocked. And another. I backpedalled furiously, barely blocking the strikes from the bo staff—but the fact of the matter was that I was actually blocking them. And every other block built up a little more energy…

I caught another overhead strike, and instead of blocking the follow-up I tried to meet it with my palm. The Impact Dial rang out, rattling the air in front of me, and Donny only barely managed to pull back his staff before it shattered. We each paused, me panting slightly and Donny not winded in the slightest. And just to make matters even more fun, the staff-wielder was swiftly joined by Mikey jumping to his side, eyes narrowed and bloodshot but still full of raw energy.

We maintained our deadlock for a few moments, until the dugongs acted on an unspoken signal and suddenly moved.

Mikey immediately shot towards me, while Donny veered off to the left. He was going to go behind me again, I just knew it, but with Mikey up in my face I wasn't able to do much about it. Where Donny was almost like a dancer, flowing from attack to attack with almost water-like fluidity, Mikey was straightforward, brutal smashing. Or, to put it another way, Donny actually had grace and strategy, while Mikey had adapted hack-and-slash to his nunchucks.

Once again I found myself on the defensive, and I kept a count in my head as the blows rained on my right arm. Not to let off the Impact Dial again. I doubted they'd let me do that. No, it was for something else…

"BEHIND!"

I was ducking even before Soundbite barked out a warning. Unfortunately, that didn't do much good as Donny had gone low with his attack this time. Fortunately, as I was squatting down, I was only lightly knocked onto my side rather than sent tumbling. I grinned as an idea came to me, and I planted my right palm on the ground.

"Impact."

With a loud bang, the Impact Dial discharged, spraying dirt and grass everywhere.

"Ackpft!"

Including into my face. Not my brightest idea, but it did get the dugongs to back off and snap their guards up, and that was precisely what I'd been going for. I quickly sprang to my feet and charged at the first dugong I saw, who turned out to be Mikey. After all, I couldn't stay on the defensive forever and the best way to flip the script would be to take out their primary enforcer first.

I did not count on Mikey wrapping up my punch in the chains of his nunchucks and flipping me off my feet.

I don't know if it was design or by accident—probably a bit of both—but as I sailed through the air, I managed to position my foot just right so that it clocked Mikey upside the head. Of course, he had that big turtle shell protecting him, but a nice and heavy armored boot connecting with his skull still dazed him a bit. Of course, I also got the wind knocked out of me upon hitting the ground, so I think we came off even in that exchange.

As I caught my breath, I felt Soundbite desperately chomp on my shoulder. I glanced up and hastily threw up my armored palm to catch Donny's staff, something I felt even through the layers of protection. My foot came up to try and meet his soft underbelly, but he put his muscular tail in the way—and in doing so, forgot about my second trick of the fight.

"GASTRO-FLASH!"

Wax or not, non-sight combat senses or not, getting a spotlight to the face hurts. More than that, the instinct to cover your eyes is both universal and very difficult to overcome, as amply demonstrated by Dragon Ball Z. With the pressure on my arms gone, I raised my other foot and managed to nail Donny clean in his face, throwing him off of me and leaving him reeling. I breathed a sigh of relief and began to stand up—

"INCOMING!"

This time the warning wasn't in time. Mikey's nunchucks hit me right between the shoulder blades. I let the blow knock me forward onto my hands, and shot my foot back in a mule-kick. It didn't hit anything, but it did force him to dodge back a bit before leaping at me again, giving me long enough to spin around—

"IMPACT!"

And slam my right gauntlet into his gut as I activated its mechanism.

"GAGH!" he cried out, flailing slightly as he tumbled on the ground. I immediately took the opportunity, diving onto the downed dugong. It wasn't any kind of formal move, closer to just kneeling on him, but I was over double his weight and size, so it worked. I punched the ground, to get as much charge as I could into the Impact Dial, and moved the gauntlet into position—

Aaaaand promptly froze when I felt a weight land on my back and wood knock against the back of my skull.

All four of us stayed frozen for a few seconds until I slowly raised my Flash gauntlet up where Donny could see it, pointedly keeping the palm facing away from him. "Truce?"

Donny was silent for a moment before removing his staff from my neck and hopping off. "I can live with that."

"Ooooowww," Mikey whined as he wiggled on the ground, clutching his belly miserably. "Damn it dude, that huuuurt…"

"Oh, you have no right to talk, Chuck-boy!" I winced as I twisted my torso back and forth, causing the spot where he'd managed to slam me to flare up painfully. "Freaking hell, those things hurt like heck!"

"You kicked me in the head and hit me with the pure force of Donny's staff!" the orange-bandanna-wearer moaned. "That does not compare to one nunchuk-blow!"

"Guys, guys," Donny cut in, coming between us with his flippers raised placatingly. "You're both babies, can we move on now?"

"HEY! I'm a baby, TOO!"

We all spared Soundbite a flat look, which he responded to with a wide grin.

"… Fine, moving on," I ultimately conceded. "So, any advice you two can give me?"

"Well, for starters… you're an instinctive fighter, Cross," Donny explained.

"Basically, that means you can lash out like a freaking maniac without thinking and not automatically get your ass handed to you," Mikey provided.

Donny glared at his fellow student and opened his mouth before trailing off and cocking his head to the side. "Alright, so he's not entirely wrong. The gist of it is that what you do is brawling with some sense to it, which Zoro told Boss and Boss told us was apparently what you're going for, and you're damn good at it, too. As for training options, well…" He shrugged helplessly. "There aren't really any formal ones. The best way to train what you do is to just let you go ahead and fight. Trial and error, and all that, let you work out all the kinks in your strategies for yourself."

I nodded thoughtfully as I processed that explanation. "Works for me…" I trailed off before looking at the snail on my shoulder. "Ah, by the way, Soundbite? You need to be a bit—"

"Say faster. I DARE YOU."

"No, no, your speed was fine!" I waved him down placatingly. "I was going to say specific. Just saying behind doesn't mean jack when an attack can come from high or low as well."

Soundbite frowned, but nodded. "I'll keep that in mind."

"Well, if we're done here, I'm going to get back to trying out more of our new arsenal," Mikey grinned eagerly, heading back towards the Merry.

"And if Nami's done with Usopp, I should probably see how far her bojutsu has progressed," Donny added, following his fellow student.

I was about to go find Lassoo when I remembered that I had something to deal with on the ship as well. Sighing, I began trudging back towards it.

"What's wrong? WE DIDN'T DO THAT badly," Soundbite said curiously.

"It's not that, Soundbite. It's about something far more serious." I shook my head grimly as I climbed back aboard the Merry. "Do me a favor, will you? Any snide remarks you feel like sharing during the coming conversation? Try and keep them to yourself unless they're constructive. This… is going to be delicate."

Soundbite seemed to shrink in on himself in apprehension; I guess he'd seen me this kind of serious enough now that he was worried about what was coming next. Probably like how I was. I climbed to the top of the Merry where Usopp had established his makeshift factory, where I saw him tinkering with the Eisen Dial's control apparatus alongside a blue rod that was splayed open and was starting to take on a very familiar form. He glanced up as he heard my approach and promptly rolled his eyes. "Look, Cross, I'm sorry about the baton, but with your armor finished, Nami won't be happy if I don't make her upgrade priority one, so—"

"This isn't about that, Usopp," I interrupted. "I could give a damn about getting shocked. I'm here about the stability of the crew."

Usopp choked off in shock and turned to fully face me.

I glanced at Soundbite and spun my finger in the air, waiting for the telltale buzz before continuing. "Usopp, this is very serious: how are you feeling after that meeting with Aokiji?"

The sniper's expression instantly darkened with doubt, and it took a few second for him to work up his nerve to reply. "…I… I remember what you said after Drum Island, Cross," he muttered morosely. "That I'd always be the weakest on the crew. At first, I was alright with things because of how you said that I was the weakest out of the world's strongest crew. And it really worked, too…" He ground his teeth. "Until now, anyway. It's just… if the Monster Trio and Boss were beaten in one shot like that, what good am I going to do against opponents like—"

"Usopp," I cut in sharply and with more than a little desperation, causing him to snap out of his thoughts. "All of us on the crew are meant to do what we can. Nothing more, and nothing less. I'm the crew's tactician, so my training in brawling is so that I can handle mooks, not full-blown officers or captains. You're a sniper, not a frontline fighter; if anything, you're supposed to be as far from the fight as possible, so that you have a better chance attacking opponents nobody else possibly can."

Usopp's expression barely lightened, and he sighed. "Cross… I know I'm stronger than I normally ever would have been at this point without you. And obviously, all the extra upgrades and weapon designs I've been doing have made it clear that I play a key role in helping the crew's weaker members. But still…" He scratched the back of his head uncomfortably. "If we're going to be up against monsters like Aokiji… I just want to make sure I live up to the crew, you know?"

I sighed in undisguised relief. I could work with this. "So… what you're saying is that you're just disappointed because you don't feel like you're living up to the name of the crew?"

Usopp started to nod his head before pausing and slowly shooting a suspicious glance my way. "Yeah… but why do you ask?"

I froze as I realized that I'd just overplayed my hand. "I… it's nothing, Usopp, just getting some ducks in—"

"What is it, Cross?" he pressed, serious as the grave.

I grimaced as I thought things over before mustering my nerve and giving Usopp an equally serious look. "Usopp… do you trust me?"

My question caught the long-nose off-guard. "Huh? What are you—?"

"Answer the question," I repeated.

"Yes, yes, I trust you, geeze! What's this got to do with—!"

"Usopp," I interrupted again. "I realize that I might have played this card to death and back when I joined the crew, but I am playing it now in full confidence: you are better off not knowing."

"What!?" Usopp squawked indignantly. "Cross, this obviously concerns me, I have a right—!"

"You have the right to know, but that does not mean that it is in your best interests," I flatly interrupted. "If you have any measure of trust in me, then you will listen to my words and heed them: that possible path in life is dead and buried in the ground, where, if I have any say in the matter, it will remain until the end of time, forever unseen and unheard. You. Are better off. Not knowing it." I softened my expression, putting as much pleading desperation into it as I could manage. "So, please… don't ask again?"

Usopp hesitated for a second before sighing and hanging his head. "Alright, Cross. If you say so."

I let out a whoosh of relief as I clapped Usopp on the shoulder. "Great, thanks! Well, seeing as that's… everything…" I paused in my exit before slowly turning back to Usopp. "Actually… one more thing. Just… want some advice to help with your confidence?"

"Uh…" Usopp thought it over before nodding tentatively. "Yeah, why not. Couldn't hurt, I guess."

"Great! Now then, first things first. Tell me this, Usopp: do you think you're a good liar?"

"Wha—? I know that I'm a good liar!"

"Then how about this: if all else fails in inspiring your confidence, why not try lying to yourself? Now, now!" I held a hand up when Usopp started to protest. "Hear me out! Look, when you get scared or feel like running, why not just try… I dunno, convincing yourself that you actually have the willpower you need to fight and win? Practice that enough and eventually you'll believe it so much that it's actually true! Genius, no?"

Usopp blinked several times as he processed that, cupping his chin in thought. "…You know, that's crazy enough that it just might—"

"LOOK out!" Soundbite suddenly hollered.

Moments later, we heard the sound of a door slamming open, followed shortly by Chopper, still clearly in the throes of the Madness Place.

"ALRIGHT, I'M DONE WITH THIS IDIOT! DO WHAT YOU WANT WITH HIM!"

The two of us quickly rushed to the edge of the Merry's top, just in time to see Luffy arc off the Merry, wafting gracefully through the air before slamming to the ground in a shower of dirt and grass. Amazingly, he stayed asleep through the whole ordeal.

Well, at least, until a small syringe-dart… well, darted off the ship and hit Luffy in the seat of his pants. Two seconds of stillness. Just two. And then—

"WOOHOO!"

Luffy shot up and started rocketing around the plain like a rubbery bat out of Impel Down, the syringe falling out immediately. And what followed was proof that giving Luffy too much caffeine or sugar was only to be done if we were going to use him as a weapon.

"I THINK he may have mastered SHAVING," Soundbite groaned dizzily, his eyestalks spinning uncontrollably. And honestly, considering the numerous footfalls and dust trails that were crisscrossing the plain and the air above it, along with dialogue that sounded almost Alvin, Simon, and Theodore-grade levels of fast and squeaky, I couldn't blame him. It also almost made me ask Chopper to make more of whatever the hell that had been for combat use.

Almost.

After a few seconds, I turned my head to look at Usopp. "You want some practice hitting a moving target?" I deadpanned.

"I acknowledge that I am good at my field, Cross," Usopp deadpanned right back. "But I am nowhere near that good."

"Fair 'nuff."

Shouts arose from the island as Luffy tore through everyone's training sessions in his stimulant-induced rampage, none more angry than Zoro and Sanji. The second I heard those particularly irate voices, I immediately hid behind the scant protection of the Merry's railing as I realized what was coming.

"Uh, Cross, what are you—?" Usopp began, before being interrupted by two-thirds of the Monster Trio.

"LUFFY!"

"Nice place you got here," Usopp commented as he huddled alongside me.

"Make yourself right at home," I invited right back.

After a few seconds of no explosion, we both poked our heads out from behind the railing. We almost immediately regretted it; I could see faces and arms flickering in and out on Zoro's sides, and Sanji's right foot was dragging along the ground, wafting up smoke. Luffy had stopped bounding around like a chipmunk on crack, and seemed to be almost appraising the threat.

And then they moved. The resulting clash promptly threw up a massive cloud of dust, streaked with fire and practically spitting razor-sharp winds. The din echoing out was devoid of grunts of pain… then, after a solid minute, we saw Luffy soar above it, his mouth bit down on his hand and his body already bulging.

"GUM-GUM!" Luffy shouted, audible even over the roar of the clash below. I gaped in awe, completely forgetting to take cover. This is what I had signed up for.

"GIANT PISTOL!"

Luffy's fist impacted the shore under the dust cloud with an almighty crash, and the hard-packed soil and the rock below simply disintegrated. And rather than add to the existing dust cloud, it blew it away entirely. I caught a glimpse of red on Sanji's foot and nine swords rather than three, before the last of the dust cleared and I got a glimpse of where Luffy had hit, distracting me from all else.

It was as if a giant had stomped on the spot—which was basically what happened. A fist-shaped chunk of coast was simply gone, as if it had never been there. And right next to it, shrunken to a foot tall, was Luffy. The contrast was so ridiculous that it triggered… something within me.

"Pff—"

"WILL YOU JUST HURRY UP AND LAUGH ALREADY!?" Nami screamed at me.

Well, who was I to deny a lady her wishes?

"PFFHAHAHAHAHAHA! I FUCKING LOVE THIS CREW SO MUCH! PFFHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Ahhh, it was good to be back.

-o-

A few hours later, we decided that we'd gotten as much as we could out of staying moored to Long Ring Long. Soon enough, we'd packed up what little of our supplies we'd unpacked, gotten everyone aboard and weighed anchor, following the course the Log set for us to reach the next stop on our journey.

As we set off on this new voyage, Nami, Zoro and I stood side-by-side on the railing, staring at the sunset.

"So," Zoro started solemnly. "We've suffered our first complete defeat as a crew, and it pushed us far enough that Luffy decided to revoke any limits on spoilers as long as it could make us stronger. And you said that this is the start of the hardest leg we're going through?"

"Aokiji was a hopeless fight, and we won't be finding another one of those anytime soon," I confirmed solemnly before allowing myself a slight grimace. "But the fights that we will find are going to push us farther than Alabasta. This extra training will help, I'm sure, but…" I hung my head with a sigh. "Well, suffice to say… buckle up."

Nami glanced between us for a moment before groaning in frustration and turning around to stride back towards the cabin, but as she walked, I didn't miss the last words she muttered beneath her breath.

"God, I need a vacation."

Cross-Brain AN: Here's something unheard of for This Bites!: a preview of the next chapter!

"Wow, it is a map, of an island! Weird name though, anyone recognize it?"

"Not me."

"Nope."

"Never heard of it."

"What about the letter that came with it?"

"Here, let me, I'll read it. Alright, let's see. Here's what is says:

"If you are a pirate among pirates…"

A Resort with a Twisted Secret…

"I DON'T KNOW HOW TO PUT IT, BUT… I DUNNO, something just sounds… off. GOOD OR BAD, I don't… this place is weird."

"Among pirates…"

A Vile Demon Hidden in Plain Sight…

"A… smiling flower, at that. Swear to God, Grand Line gets weirder every day…"

"Among pirates…"

A Pitiful Man With a Terrible Past…

"Every single one of those arrows symbolizes a day of loneliness I endured after that storm. They are the number of the regrets I have suffered at suddenly losing every one of my beloved crewmates. Have you had a glimpse of what I've endured?"

"Then gather your steadfast crew of companions…"

Doubt Turns to Conflict, Conflict Turns to Hate, Hate Turns to Madness…

"HEY! GET BACK HERE, BITCH! THAT'S MY AUDIENCE! GIVE ME BACK MY AUDIENCE!"

"And set sail for our island."

And All the World Made to Bear Witness

"LUUUUUUUFFYYYYYYY!"

"The name of the island is…"

The Island that Nobody Leaves…

"How… how could this happen? WHAT HAPPENED TO MY FRIENDS?!"

OMATSURI ISLAND.

"Wow, this place sounds like fun!"

"Yeah, it does… any opinions on it, Cross?"

"Hmm… I'll be honest, I think I might have? But I can't quite… ah, no, wait a second! Yeah, now I remember! I saw a poster for—ah… for, for… for an event! Yeah, an event about the place! Never actually saw it so I've got no clue what to expect, buuut the poster itself looked pretty cheery! Flowers everywhere, bright and colorful; probably nothing on the island itself to worry about. In my opinion?"

"Tell me this is just a NIGHTMARE. SOMEONE WAKE ME UP!"

"I'd say that this could turn out to be the most relaxing vacation of our lives."

Cross-Brain AN: All of a sudden, that ending turned into a devastating cliffhanger. And for those of you who don't get how, well… clearly, you've never seen the darkest tale ever to bear the name of One Piece: Baron Omatsuri and the Secret Island.

Patient AN: It's high time that we got to include a bit of horror in this story, and so we shall… at the stroke of midnight next Sunday. Don't hold it against us… you don't know what we've been through…

Hornet AN: Are you ready?

Xomniac AN: Sleep tight, readers… don't let the flowers bite.