Lost In My Thoughts

I'm home walking into the apartment I'm met with Jenn storming towards me , pulling me towards the couch we sat down. Spill it , and don't leave out anything I want all the wonderful details of what it's like to date Jacob West. Did he kiss you , did you have sex " tell me, come on Nitika i need to know what his kiss is like what his lips feel like ,how big is he , and she smirks at me . What that's way to personal and nothing happened between us " and even if it did I wouldn't tell you or anyone else . With a shocked look on her face she says " nothing happened, nothing at all she asks. Nothing Jenn i say , we had dinner talked , walked on the beach then he brought me home . That's boring and that's not what rumors say about him , he sleeps with any woman once then never sees them again she says disappointed" because I had no juicy gossip for her. Jenn you work in the entertainment industry, you know 99.9 % of the shit that gets said is just that rumors . Well maybe half of them is bull shit she says but Jacob West is such a bad boy I can't imagine him not making a move on you . Well he didn't and now can I go to bed I'm exhausted and morning comes fast. Okay okay go to bed and Jenn adds your no fun Nitika " I know he had to have kissed you or something I mean he is a male with needs . I laugh at what Jenn said and walk to my bedroom leaving her behind sitting on the couch in a daze. I get into my room and started stripping my cloths off, I can still smell Brandon's sent on me" I wrap my arms around myself and think back to the beach , the kiss God was it good . I can still feel his lips on mine his tongue in my mouth , mine tangled with his. His lips was so soft and the kiss left me breathless, I wanted more I couldn't get any closer I pulled on his shirt wrapped my arm around his neck and pulled him as close to me as I could. The kiss lasted until we both needed air then we broke the kiss and panted trying to get air back in our lungs as we looked at each other and I wanted him take me right there on the beach. I can't stop thinking about Brandon " I shake my head to bring me out of my thoughts. What the heck am I doing , snap out of it Nitika I say to myself, he is way out of your league . And he is someone who can't be trusted with your heart. I can't let him kiss me again , I can't let him in or I can't let this affect my job. I'll just refuse to go out with Brandon from now on unless it's a business thing . I can't do this , to much temptation he can never be faithful to one girl. I know he said he isn't like what is said about him " but I don't know if I fully believe it. It's to easy for him to get what he wants and girls throw themselves at him. I can't be involved with anyone like him , I can't handle his fame and the girls who throw themselves at him. Like Jenn said he is a male and he has needs and I can't give myself to him like that. At least not right now , he needs to prove that I can trust him and he won't hurt me . If he's really serious about winning my heart it should be easy to do that , but will I make it easy for him" I laugh at my thoughts and head to the bathroom for a shower .