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Cosmic Janitor

A man on a hospital bed was offered a job by a god. Said god introduced himself as a "god of amusement and entertainment." The man unhesitatingly accepted; what was the reason? He was bored. Having lived his life to the literal fullest—parachuting, skydiving, racing, boxing, and other adrenaline-pumping activities—left him exactly in his condition—a crippled, sick, BUT bored man in his middle thirties.  Join him in his wild adventures as he battles devils, zombies, and all sorts of crazy stuff you can dream up while lying in bed. Updates: It depends on my workload. Also, on my cat's mood. Suggestions: I've got some "worlds" planned, but feel free to suggest a game or anime world that needs some serious "cleaning." Disclaimer: The characters mentioned are not mine, except the OCs. Especially the Book Cover.

ChrisTian3421 · Anime & Comics
Not enough ratings
71 Chs

Euphoria

(Katsuo POV)

Feeling the itch for some action, I decided to take matters into my own hands. I approached Batman, who was in the middle of monitoring some surveillance feeds.

"Hey Bats, mind if I borrow a car? I need to unwind a bit," I said casually.

Batman looked at me for a moment, then nodded. "Sure, just bring it back in one piece."

He led me to the garage, where a myriad of cars were parked, each one more impressive than the last. My eyes landed on a sleek black LC 500. Intrigued by its design, I picked it.

With the keys in hand, I opened my interface and searched for an unpopulated beach far from the watchtower. After finding the perfect spot, I bought the truffle worm and a fishing rod for 1,000 points.

The next day, I drove to the chosen beach. The drive was exhilarating, the LC 500 purring smoothly beneath me as I navigated through the roads. Upon arriving at the beach, I stepped out, the salty sea breeze hitting my face.

"Alright, Duke Fishron," I muttered, "time to cure this boredom."

I prepared the fishing rod, attaching the truffle worm and casting it into the ocean. As I waited, the anticipation built up inside me, a grin spreading across my face. This was going to be interesting.

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As I stood on the beach, the sun setting behind me and casting long shadows across the sand, I felt a sudden tug on the line. The water began to churn, bubbles rising to the surface. I braced myself, tightening my grip on the fishing rod.

Then, lo and behold, the mighty Duke Fishron burst forth from the ocean in a spectacular display of power and fury. His massive form, a mix of shark and dragon, glistened in the dimming light. His eyes locked onto me, filled with primal rage.

"Pigface!" I shouted, unsheathing my Adamantine Tachi. "Let's dance."

With a roar, Duke Fishron charged at me, waves crashing around his enormous body. I dodged to the side, narrowly avoiding his initial strike. Summoning my lightning manipulation, I coated my blade with crackling energy, the sparks illuminating the growing darkness.

Fishron came at me again, this time with even more ferocity. I slashed through the air, my blade meeting his scales with a satisfying clash. The force of the impact sent a shockwave rippling through the water, but the beast barely flinched.

I switched to rapid slashes, each strike infused with lightning, aiming for his vulnerable spots. Duke Fishron retaliated with a barrage of water tornadoes, forcing me to use Shunpo to evade. The battle raged on, each of us giving our all.

At one point, Fishron dived back into the ocean, only to emerge seconds later, his speed doubled and his eyes glowing an eerie red. "Great, he's entered his second phase," I muttered, adjusting my stance.

I intensified my attacks, mixing in Judgment Cuts to keep him on his toes. Every strike I landed seemed to make him angrier, but also weaker. After a particularly vicious exchange, I managed to land a decisive blow, piercing through his side.

With a final, deafening roar, Duke Fishron fell back into the ocean, defeated. The water calmed, the waves returning to their gentle rhythm as his body dissolved into sparkling light.

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Just as I was catching my breath from the exhilarating battle with Duke Fishron, the sky took on an ominous red hue. The blood moon was rising. My pulse quickened with excitement, a mad grin spreading across my face. This night was far from over.

"Dreadnautilus," the name echoed in my mind, bringing with it a thrill of anticipation.

Without hesitation, using my fishing rod, I summoned the mini-boss. The ocean surface began to churn once more, and out of the depths emerged the Dreadnautilus, its grotesque form illuminated by the blood-red moon. Tentacles writhed and lashed, its massive shell gleaming menacingly.

"Alright, you ugly brute," I muttered, gripping my Adamantine Tachi tightly. "Let's make this night unforgettable."

The Dreadnautilus lunged at me, its tentacles whipping through the air. I dodged and weaved, using Shunpo to stay ahead of its attacks.

My blade sliced through the air, lightning-infused strikes sparking with each hit. The creature's eerie cries filled the night, but I was undeterred, my grin only widening with each successful strike.

As the battle raged on, I switched to the Threaded Cane, transforming it into its bladed form to keep the monster at bay. I executed rapid slashes, mixing in Judgment Cuts to disorient the beast. The Dreadnautilus retaliated with torrents of water and grasping tentacles, but I danced around its attacks, each movement precise and deadly.

The blood moon cast an eerie glow over the beach, turning the battle into a surreal, almost otherworldly experience. I could feel the thrill of the fight coursing through my veins, the adrenaline pushing me to new heights of combat prowess.

The Dreadnautilus's movements grew more frantic as I wore it down, its attacks becoming more desperate. Finally, with a well-timed series of strikes, I managed to land a critical blow, piercing its vulnerable core. The creature let out a final, gurgling screech before collapsing, its body dissolving into a mass of shimmering light.

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Just as I thought the battle with the Dreadnautilus was over, the waters began to churn violently again. Dozens upon dozens of monstrosities emerged from the depths, each more grotesque than the last. My heart raced with a mix of exhilaration and anticipation.

"Guess we're not done yet," I muttered, gripping my Adamantine Tachi tightly.

I plunged back into the fray, slicing through the hordes with precision and power. The night air was filled with the sounds of clashing steel and the roars of the beasts.

My blade danced in the moonlight, each strike infused with lightning, cutting through the abominations with ease. The Threaded Cane in my off-hand added versatility to my attacks, transforming and lashing out at the creatures trying to overwhelm me.

Then, amidst the chaos, a chilling message echoed in my head: "The air is getting colder around you..."

I barely had time to register the warning before Skeletron Prime descended from the sky, its menacing mechanical limbs whirring and clanking ominously. A euphoric feeling surged through me, pushing me to the edge of madness. This was the challenge I craved.

"Big guy," I shouted, my grin widening to a near-maniacal state. "Let's dance!"

Skeletron Prime's skeletal arms lashed out, each one equipped with deadly weapons. I darted and weaved, using Shunpo to evade its attacks while countering with rapid slashes and Judgment Cuts.

The air crackled with energy as my blade met metal, sparks flying in all directions.

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Back at the Watchtower, an alarm rang out, piercing through the corridors with urgency. The Justice League members immediately regrouped, their faces etched with concern.

"What's the situation?" Wonder Woman asked, her voice calm but urgent.

"A boss has spawned," Green Lantern reported, his ring glowing. "But there's one person missing."

"Where's Katsuo?" Superman inquired, his eyes narrowing.

Batman, ever the vigilant, felt a knot of worry tighten in his chest. "I'll find him," he said, his tone grim.

As Batman scoured the Watchtower's surveillance systems, he finally located my signal. His eyes widened in alarm as he saw me on the beach, surrounded by monstrosities and locked in a fierce battle with Skeletron Prime.

"We need to get to him, now," Batman ordered, his voice leaving no room for argument.

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Back at the beach, I fought with a ferocity that bordered on the insane, my attacks growing more relentless with each passing second. The blood moon cast an eerie glow over the battlefield, heightening the surreal, nightmarish atmosphere.

Despite the overwhelming odds, I held my ground, driven by the thrill of the fight and the euphoria of the challenge. Skeletron Prime's limbs whirred and clashed, but my blade was always there to meet them, each strike more powerful than the last.

As the Justice League raced to my location, Batman couldn't shake the growing concern for my safety and mental state. The young warrior they had taken in was powerful, but the line between control and chaos was becoming dangerously thin.