Review Detail of Zhoa_Fei in My life revolves around you

So upon reading the overview and the first 10 chapters, I have this to say; •Solid Characters •Interesting Plot There are a few things holding back this story though. This is merely my opinion, but the story could be organized a bit better. Dialogue separated from the regular first POV text. some of the paragraphs could be broken up. I am assuming that this is your style, but the short chapters are more of a detriment than an asset. While your overall writing is good, the shortness of the chapter leaves more to be desire. As I continue reading and reviewing perhaps things will change.