It's really good but my only problem is that the romance is rushed a lot. We should've seen more scenes of them hanging out and slowly falling in love. Not only that I feel like Ruby and Aqua accepted him too quickly, especially Ruby. Good story just rushed. 7/10

This chapter seemed a bit all over the place. Don't know if it's just me but I could barely tell what was happening.

Another thing I forgot to mention is how the author when use 5 or so paragraphs to explain one thing when you can just use one. That needs to be condensed because I always find myself skipping a bunch of paragraph because it's just a long ass explanation of one topic.

I like it but I do wish there were more good characters. Scarlet sucks so far and is really annoying, I really hope that when eventually she warms up to the MC she actually apologizes for her behavior and I hope the MC doesn't forgive her without a sincere apology cuz that's just simp behavior.

I'm so confused about what's happening bro

no

The grammar is really bad. It's also hard to tell who's talking a lot of the times, there needs do be less of those long paragraphs because it makes the dialogue difficult to read. But besides all that I am enjoying it so far and I hope the author continues and improves.

Yes but you should have made it sound like that, the way you did it was so abrupt. for example: "It would be cool if I could guide peter and make him a better Spider-Man.". That sounds better is making it more seamless but the way you did left me like 'why did he just randomly think that?'

I really like it. The only problem I have is just how little use the system gets so much that it's almost like it's not even there for most of the story. I think it should be used more and use it on practical things like giving the MC a skill or talent like eidetic memory or something (Of course he would have to work for it). It was also a bit too slow paced during the visiting the family arc, but I think it's better now.

I like the concepts but the characters are so boring, their like cardboard cutouts. Besides the dad no one gets any development or have their personality explored. Also there is way too much internal dialogue for the MC. Most of it is just unnecessary and makes it difficult to get invested in anything. There's also the fact that nothing intersting ever happens. It's literally just MC write a book, book does good, MC film a movie, movie does good without any amount of substance. 5/10 Could be much better.

I am kind of disappointed that's he's so serious all the time. I know why and I know he's trying to focus on getting stronger but I would still like to see him acting goofy with his friends from time to time. I think moments like that are necessary to break tension

It started off good but quickly got too convoluted with the story. The MC doesn't even really have a goal as to why he's doing the stuff that he's doing. Getting stronger to 'protect his family' is a weak excuse authors use to give a goal to an MC but it doesn't have any substance. He also applies for university but never goes there and yes he probably won't learn anything there at this point, why make it a system quest and waste our time with that whole plot line in the first place?

All characters suck the only one it seems effort is actually put in is Bryce and it's still very minimal the good thing is that he actually has a backstory kind of, with his grandpa in the hospital

bro how does he 'love' this girl? We don't know anything about her yet they are already in love how does that make any sense? Your supposed to get us to care about a character so important but if Isabella died the next chapter I wouldn't care WHICH IS BAD.

Yup definitely has a fast pacing. Isabella should have been explored more as a character and we should've seen more interactions between her and the MC before we even think of going out on a date. So far all the characters including the MC are extremely bland.

Pacing is a bit fast, I think you should have established the MC' s personality and his circumstances a bit more. Right now we literally know nothing about the MC besides his name which makes him pretty bland.

I read a few chapters of the last one but quickly got bored of it. This one seems much better so far and I love that we get perspectives of the heroes. Looking forward to more.

please let kaguya stay with miyuki. I love their relationship soo much

can you please tell me which chapter he tells Ibara that he cheated cuz I really feel like dropping this now. I don't care about spoilers so please just tell me

I wonder when peter is going to meet harry cuz I thought they would've met by now. Also I hope peter still becomes spider-man and still fights some villians on his own without Tut helping him. Thanks for the chapter.