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Dip_Stick_760811mthCommentedCh 164 Chapter 8.19 - The Scent of Fury- Dip_Stick_760811mthCommented
new chapter / book qhen
They immediately had to pull up, as a large tentacle came from the water to swat at them. The sea itself seemed to come alive as all manner of monsters from the surrounding waters took to shore, called by the sweet scent of Fury. - Dip_Stick_76081yrCommented
please return it to Eligor
This book has been deleted. - Dip_Stick_76081yrCommented
please change it to eligor
This book has been deleted. - Dip_Stick_76081yrCommented
schools of fish
Gradually, more and more fish appeared in flocks instead of two or three and swam together toward the stern. Looking far ahead, Ashes was shocked at this phenomenon—as more and more fish joined this flock, there was a dark red, thick line appearing in the sea. Apparently, the sailing ship marched on by following this red line, and she could hear the sound of striking from time to time as those fish swam through the bottom of the ship. - Dip_Stick_76081yrCommentedCh 21 Chapter 21 : At Year 12 I Will Kill Him
- Dip_Stick_76081yrCommented
better translater or grammar cmon now use Grammarly
Waldo's hand stopped trembling, and suddenly he was not fear anymore. Seeing Arthur's eyes made him felt what Arthur said would be true. The persistence when he swung his sword, by that persistence, Waldo knew Arthur could be strong, much stronger than he could imagine. - Dip_Stick_76081yrCommented
My name is Mr. Griffith....
"Are you sure?" Ferlin found it quite funny when Irene talked about those scripts so seriously and asked, "Do you think it's even better than Mr. Kajen Fels' widely recognized works, 'For Rose' and 'A Prince Searching for Love'? They don't only hit in the king's city, but also attract troupes from the other kingdoms to watch and learn. I could hear Mr. Griffith's name all the time even in the stronghold." - Dip_Stick_76081yrCommented
"Roughly the size of three football fields."
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intimidate is the wrong word
This paragraph has been deleted. - Dip_Stick_76081yrCommented
Switching between points of veiw rather than having a fixed with, isn't isn't problem but transition should be worked on
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Paragraph summarize and organization needs to be worked on
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Major grammar flaws bu it's stylized nicely I expect to see better in the coming chapters
The boy is confused and full of joy at the same time. He did not clearly understand what his mother said, but he was happy to hear that from her. - Dip_Stick_76081yrReplied to ondrej147
that's an amazing aruguement I'm glad you can hold to your claims
[PRE: 31] - Dip_Stick_76081yrCommented
can you like use spellchecker bro
This paragraph has been deleted. - Dip_Stick_76081yrCommentedCh 9 Chapter 9: Counting the Rewards
- Dip_Stick_76081yrCommented
a long knife is around 7 to 9 inches but we don't need a accurate accessmwnt of how deep the knife went
One after another, the knife was plunged three inches deep into the bear's body. - Dip_Stick_76081yrCommented
ummm 99.99 percent is to high the game would be to hard and I doubt a scrub would enjoy the game like she is
As the only super-game in the real world whose realism approached 99.99%, the number of players in the game was naturally brimming. The game had just launched, but there were already a large number of players flooding in. - Dip_Stick_76081yrCommented
shotty start no back ground and the fact that he instantly knew what happened was a gross way about it
When he woke up, he realized that he had transmigrated. - Dip_Stick_76081yrCommented
has never succeeded
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