2. Despair.

Severus was sitting nearby the lake, wishing that this day goes by sooner than it should.

He hated Christmas. Every Christmas has been the same for as long as he remembers.

Every year his mother would scold his father for not bringing something to celebrate, all while his father would go on ranting that she spoiled his life.

He loved his mother dearly yet a part of him blamed her for not leaving his father.

As he closed his eyes to remember the last his mother smiled, he heard someone crying out to him, not just someone random, no, it was like his mother was calling for him.

He looked around, seeing much time has passed since he came here, he got up to leave.

He made his way back to his house.

Severus didn't know what was waiting for him at his house.

--

*Severus's POV*

I got up from the lakeside and walked towards my house.

On my way back home, I saw all the houses in this dumpster of a street decorated for Christmas.

Children played with their parents in the snow with happiness slipping all over their house, as if they forgot their livelihood and all the harsh days they would spend in the coming year, and found joy in the smallest of presents.

As I continued to walk down the street illuminated by the decoration, I saw a group of friends making snowmen together and having a snowball fight.

Seeing them laugh without the care in the world, made my heart fill with sadness.

Ever since we broke our friendship, my mind always went back to Lily at any mention of friends.

I wasn't blind to her disdain towards some of my Slytherin roommates.

She had a legit reason to be disgusted by them though.

Avery and Mulciber were not extremely good when it came to their manners.

Then there is their prank or whatever they called on Mary McDonald, which didn't do any good for their image.

I knew what Mulcibler did was wrong but I just let it slide as I was angry at potter and his gang.

Neither she nor I have tried to talk to each other since our fight last year.

After the incident at the lake, I stood in front of the Gryffindor common room to apologize to her, yet she chooses to end our friendship.

Since she didn't want to be friends any longer, I wasn't going to beg her to reconsider.

Ever since then, we drifted apart, she grew closer to her housemates, while I opted the increase my standing in Slytherin.

Slytherin wasn't an easy place to survive, being a half-blood didn't make it any better.

Everyone in my house wore a mask to hide their true feeling and purpose, some wore masks to gain something while the others wore a mask to survive in a place where your valve depends on your blood and talent.

I had to hide the fact that my mother was disowned, only Lucius knew that I was a part of the Prince family.

I understood where Lily's argument came from, and I knew most of the death eaters were cruel people, but I was just tired of being an outsider, both inside and outside of my Hogwarts house.

In Slytherin, I was alienated at first due to my clothes and poor background.

Through effort and some support from Lucius, I was able to stop other purebloods in the Slytherin from attacking me.

I had to fight off students from the third to the fifth year of Slytherin in the starting year of Hogwarts.

I shook my head, deciding not to want to think about Lily.

People accused me of joining death eater yet they never appreciated my talents, so I wanted to join people who did.

# Snape Residence #

-3rd POV-

Severus reached his home, calling it home would be an exaggeration, the only thing he ever cared about in this house is his mother.

Even if she returned to the wizarding world, her situation won't become less complicated, unless his so-called grandparents welcome her back.

Severus knew how the pureblood family took their enmity out, if his grandparents found out she returned to the wizarding world, they would surely make her life even more problematic.

He didn't know his grandparents but from what his mother told him, they were blood purists and hated muggles.

They banished his mother from their family as soon as they knew she was married to a muggle.

Severus entered the house and made his way towards the kitchen room.

As he gripped the knob handle of the kitchen door, a sense of dread washed over him.

Feeling a sense of urgency, he yanked the door open.

what he witnessed, broke his heart into a million pieces.

His mother lay unconscious in a puddle of blood.

He felt paralyzed, unable to move. His worst possible nightmare came to life.

"Sev"

Eileen called out to her son in a low voice, finding the strength to stall the grim ripper just to see her son one last time.

Seeing her hand extending towards him, Severs ran and grabbed her hand.

"Mother, please don't speak, please. I will treat your wounds. You are going to be ok, I am here. Everything is going to be ok. "

Severus's heart rate quickened, for the first time in his life, he was scared, afraid of losing the most important person in his life.

Unable to concentrate on a spell to cast it perfectly due to the range of emotions he was suffering from, he forcefully occlumended, pushing all the emotions back of his mind.

He inspected his mother all over, finding a broken glass bottle lodged into her and a severe injury on her head.

Severus pulled my wand and start incanting a Healing spell over the injury on her forehead, stopping the bleeding.

Severus can feel his occlumency barrier slipping, but he forced himself to bottle up the emotions he was feeling since he still needed to stop the bleeding from her stomach

Forcing himself to concentrate, Severus slowly incanted a spell to stop the blood from flowing from the wound.

"Mother, please stay still, I will remove this bottle now. I promise it won't hurt. Please keep your eyes open! Please be conscious! It will be over in two seconds, Please!"

Severus begged her in a panicked voice on seeing her start losing her consciousness.

Severus incanted another set of Healing spells simultaneously, one spell numbing her to pain, while the second spell healed her wound.

The bleed stopped but her condition wasn't getting better.

The vibrance in her ebony eyes started to dim, her lips started to darken, and her face continued to pale further.

A sad smile graced Eileen's lips on seeing her son's desperate expression, she knew it was her time. 'Till the end, I just caused you pain. My foolishness just caused yo suffering. If only I was stronger...'

"Sev, I am sorry"

She whispered in her barely conscious state as Severus cleaned the wound.

Severus decided it was better to take her to a nearby hospital.

"Please stop talking, mother. I will take you to the nearby hospital. Everything will all be right. Please…Please."

Severus thought about apparating but in his state of mind and her decreasing pulse, it would cause more problems and will be deadly for his mother.

Severus picked her up in his arms, and start to move towards the hall.

Eileen cupped her son's cheek with her hand and started caressing it.

"My little prince, you…...came. I'm sorry, Severus. …. *Cough* I can feel my time coming to an end. *cough * I'm sorry for not being the mother I should have been, Sev. You deserved better, a better mother,....a..better father...a better ..fam---"

She coughed blood as she spoke.

"Please… Stop talking, you can tell me everything when you are treated You are the best mother I could have asked for. Please stop talking. You are everything I deserve, everything I need, a mother, a father, a family.., you are all of it. Please...please."

Tears formed in Severus's eyes as Eileen continued talking in a sweet tone.

'Mother, I want to be like Merlin, the greatest wizard. I promise.... just like the stories you tell me.' A memory of four-year-old Severus flashed in front of Eileen's dimmed eyes.

'So vibrant, you were so happy, cheerful. Your little heart held a very big ambition. You had such vibrant black eyes, unique from everyone, they were so magical. Those black eyes laid your emotion bare for the world to witness. They grew dimmer whenever you were sad or upset, and they would shine brightly whenever you were happy, so magical. You shone brightly from other kids your age.' Eileen looked into Severus's eyes and thought ' For the past six years, your eyes never shined the way they did before. This world, no...I robbed you of your vibrant happiness. There is so much I wish I could say but I can feel my life slipping away. At least in this final time, I will remind you of your goal. A goal that filled you with happiness before this world bared its fangs into you."

Forcing herself to speak, Eileen whispered weakly "Sev, listen to…*cough*Me. Neither the muggle nor purebloods deserve you, you shone brightly from a young age, I always knew *cough * you would become a great wizard. Don't waste your talents on them, neither light nor dark deserve you. Use your talent for yourself. Follow your.....heart."

"OK, I will become the greatest wizard, I promise you but please stay awake. We will be at the hospital in no time."

Eileen started moving back and forth between being conscious and unconscious.

"I…. *cough*... never planned on staying with your father. I was…. just waiting for you to complete Hogwarts. We would have left him. I... was afraid that my parents would never accept you, that they *cough *would make your life hard. I just want you to be...happy."

Eileen kept talking while she caressed his face with a sad smile.

"Please stop talking. I know mother, I know. I will be happy once you are better."

Severus begged her to stop her from continuing to talk. Severus's vision starts to blur due to tears.

Severus reached the front door, he noticed that Eileen losing consciousness.

"Please don't leave, please don't. I beg you, please"

"I'm sorry son, I love you, son. I'm proud of …."

Eileen drew her last breath before she could tell her son that he was her pride, her reason for continuing to live till now. Her hand that so lovingly caressed Severus's cheek fell.

Severus looked down at the lifeless body of the woman, who gave birth to him, the person who loved him the most was now gone.

He fell to his knees unable to process why this happened to him, why his mother, and what was his sin.

"AHHHHHH!!!!!!"

He hugged her body close to him, desperately hoping for her to gain consciousness.

"Why did you go? What am I going to do? Just Why?!! WHY?!! What was my sin? The God, who everyone says grants miracles, grant me one. For the first time in my life, I am asking.....begging you, please give my mother back to me. I have no one else to live for. Everything I ever loved is leaving me. Please.."

He desperately held her body close to him, hoping for a miracle.

"Please come back, please awake up, mother. Please"

"Why are you shouting brat?!"

Severus heard the voice of the man who took his mother away from him.

Uncontrollable rage took over him, He carefully placed his mother on the floor and made his way towards the kitchen, where the scum was.

Severus knew it was him the second he saw the bottle that was lodged in his mother's stomach.

Tobias was the reason Severus hated muggles, the man took his mother away from him.

Only one thought came to Severus's mind, to cause Tobias a thousand times the pain he was feeling right now.

With each step Severus took, His hate for his father increased.

Severus saw the pieces of the bottle that Tobias used to stab his mother.

Levitating all those broken pieces, Severus made them move them along with him.

On seeing Severus levitate the broken pieces, Tobias yelled in fear, "What are you doing? Why are you levitating those pieces? Won't you be arrested for using magic? don't come near me."

"I will make you pay for taking her away from me. I can deal with ministry afterward. I don't care if I have to go to Azkaban. "

Severus didn't care even if the ministry got wind of it.

Severus has used magic in this house before, but he wasn't arrested or expelled as my mother was a witch.

Severus launched all those pieces at Tobias.

On all sharp pieces piercing Tobias, blood started to flow from the wounds that were caused due to piercing.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!"

Tobias cried in pain as hundreds of small pieces pierce him.

Severus wasn't done yet, he left out the vital parts since he wanted to prolong Tobias's suffering.

Severus pulled all those pieces back from his body and launched at Tobias again.

"Ahhh!!!"

*Cough* *Cough*

Tobias coughs blood.

Severus transfigured all smaller pieces into a knife.

'He won't have the pleasure of dying to those small pieces. I will end you on my own two hands' Severus thought darkly.

"Stay...away, Stay away from me!!"

"Please... don't come near me, You devil!!!"

Tobias pleaded to Severus in fear, he saw Severus's eye glow in some strange blue in the dark, making Severus look even more menacing, causing Tobias to crawl away from him.

Severus didn't think of the consequences of what he was doing due to hate, rage, and anger burning in his heart.

Right now, His only thought was to make Tobias go through hell.

Severus cast a curse of his invention on Tobias.

"Sectumsempra"

"Ahhh!!!" Tobias cried out in pain, as his body was cut from all sides.

"Your cries are like a melody to my heart, you scum. Plead for help. Yell in desperation"

*cough* *cough*

Tobias coughs blood as crawled away from him.

"Vulnera Sanentur"

Severus cast the counter spell on Tobias to give him the hope to survive and take it away from him.

"Please …stay away!!! Please help !!!!!!!!! Someone, can anyone hear me!!!!"

Tobias tried to stand up but Severus stomp on her leg, breaking it.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!"

Tobias fell to the ground, crying due to the pain he never experienced in his life. Tears rolled his eyes were mixed with snot and blood, making the bloodied man look uglier.

"Please forgive me. I'm your father!!!! I am sorry. Please spare me."

Tobias caught Severus's legs and desperately begged.

Severus caught his hair and made him look at him.

"This is just the beginning. I make you wish that you were never born." Said Severus with a sinister smile.

"Please Severus, I am your father. I didn't know what I was doing. *cough* I was drunk. Please spare me!"

"You should have thought of that before drinking. Before ever raising your hand at her."

"Ahhh!!!" Severus cast another Sectumsempra on him.

After a period, he cast the counter spell after some time.

He repeated the process for some more turns.

"Please....kill...me. I can't take it anymore." Tobias begged.

"No, I am not done yet"

"Please…KILL….ME. I beg you, Severus!!!!"

Severus saw Tobias's will to live die.

Severus showed Tobias the knife that he transfigured from broken bottle pieces that he used to kill Eileen.

"With this bottle, you took her away from me, my mother. I never cared about you. She gave up so much for you but you only gave her a life of torment. YOU TOOK HER AWAY FROM ME!!!"

Severus stabbed him with the same knife which was transfigured using the pieces of the broken bottle, the same bottle, that this pathetic being used to kill his mother.

"Ahhh!!"

"WHY!!!"

"Ahh!!"

*Cough*

"WHY!!!"

"Ahh!!"

*Cough*

"WHY!!!"

"Ahh!!"

* Cough*"

"Ahh!!"

"Wh...."

Severus finally stopped when was no longer able to hear a cry from Tobias.

Severus threw the knife to another corner of the room and looked at his hands, hands that were covered in the blood of both of his parents, a mother who he wasn't able to save, and a father who e murdered.

Severus stumbled away from Tobias's body, hitting the wall.

After all the rage that was clouding his mind cleared, he witnessed the bloodied scene he caused.

He looked down at his hands that were covered in the blood of his parents, feeling emptiness.

His leg finally gave up, making him fall to the floor.

looking at the lifeless body of the ma he had just murdered, Severus whispered "What have I done?" in despair.