Chapter Eight

When Breanna turned fifteen, she was already half way through a relationship that cost her a lot of self confidence. She had dyed hair in the front with the sides and back shaved. She had a few friends at this point and was doing alright in school. She was still self-harming, but only a few people knew. She was trying her best to be happy, but that didn't seem possible. During the summer of that year, her father asked her a question that made her heart drop. He wanted to move to South Carolina with Nemo. Breanna wanted to say no. She wanted to be selfish and keep her friends and keep working on herself, but she saw the hope in her father's eyes. She knew that he didn't want to feel alone. She knew that he was struggling and needed help and she didn't want to be the one to keep that from him. She wanted him to be happy and to get better. She didn't want what happened when she stopped her first anti-depressants without telling anyone to happen again.

Breanna said that they could move. She didn't want to because she really did love Washington, even though she had to take extra vitamin D on top of her anti-depressants. She didn't want to have to start over again and have to make more friends. She wanted to work things out where she was, but she loved her father and wanted him to be okay even if she wasn't. She spent as much time as she could with her friends before she moved away. She told herself that everything would be okay and that she would get better when they moved. Her mind told her that she was just creating false hope, but what else did she have? Her family was the most important part of her life. Even though she knew she was the black sheep and that she was invisible most of the time, her family meant the most to her. She wanted to make sure that they would all have a chance to get better.

Packing was hard because there were so many things in their home. Most of it was placed into storage and only a few things went with them. Nemo flew up so that she could drive down with them. The drive wasn't as nice as when they moved to Washington. Breanna was angry, but she wouldn't tell anyone that. She had spent the last few years not holding back what she said and felt and only stopped because she saw how it affected others. She learned to hold everything under a tight seal and to not let it out. She couldn't risk it. She spend the ride looking up at the sky, imagining her flying next to the car or riding a dire wolf. She would read or write as the trip went on, letting herself disappear into the background. That's all she felt she could do.