Nineteen

Hours past and it wasn't until shortly after my own medication and injections were taken that the doctors finally came up to me and Patricia about mum, "Hello trouble, your mum is ready for people to see her, it looks like she may have a circulatory problem which is brought on by stress, however, I am also going to get her to start seeing a therapist which apologises I should have recommended years ago when your father passed" Doctor Wheeler explained and apologised as I shook my head and we got up and started walking towards the room that Dr Wheeler had assigned to my mum, "don't be silly Doc, you know that my family causes all sorts of troubles, the list of things you can remember is beyond a normal person" I defended and Patricia also nodded, "You've been our doctor for years and you have so many other patients, nothing is your fault" Patricia added as we got to the door of the room. "I will leave you guys to have a talk with her" Wheeler walked off and we entered the room.

We slowly walked into the room and it was silent, no TV, just the sound of all the monitors that were beside my mum's bedside, we walked closer to her and sat down beside her, "Hi Mum it's me and Patricia" I spoke softly as she slowly stirred and opened up her eyes, "hello Hun, have you had your medication?" Good old mum being a mum, caring for everyone else before herself, "yes mum, but the more important thing is are you doing well, Wheeler told us about what the diagnosis and I think it's definitely time that we focused on you, I am older enough to understand what to do" I said with concern lacing my words, Patricia nodded and placed her hand on my mum, my mum looked over at her and smiled, "it's time to look after yourself, everyone has had you are their carer but now it's time for you look to after yourself, go on holiday? take a road trip or just do nothing at home, I think you deserve it" she smiled warmly at my mum and well my mum just had to take it all in, she had no reason to disagree and every reason to agree because I am pretty sure she would rather be on a beach than in a hospital bed running off of IV's and eating sandwiches.

After we had been in there for a couple of hours Patricia decided that I need to get some air and something to eat as it probably won't help me in the long run.

Me - Hi Vinnie, I haven't heard from you all day today and I am a little worried, my mum is in hospital so I won't be at home for a while as she is being monitored at all times for a few weeks. Hope to hear from you soon

I placed my phone down and picked up my burger bringing it to my face and taking a bite, "you alright Hun? you seem to be pre-occupied?" Patricia asked as I shrugged and nodded with a weak smile on my face, "Vinnie hasn't spoken to me since the party and we left on bad terms because I was mad at him and well he hasn't messaged me at all and I am worried" I said as she sighed and ate a chip, "oh darling, I am sure that he will message you in due time especially he is a teenager and has been to a party" she said as I nodded and ate a few chips.

Being on bad terms with people especially when you are ill with something that can kill you really makes everything that bit harder, I have to understand that I am not here for that much longer so I tend to not stay friends with people for long, or make them aware that I am dying.

Libby: Hello stranger! are we still alive and causing trouble?

I quickly turned my phone around with a smile and then as if I wasn't happy that Libby messaged my smile faded, "was that him?" Patricia asked with light in her eyes as I shook my head and unlocked my phone "Libby"

Me - Hi Lib, I am still very much alive and causing trouble but this time I am visiting my mum in hospital, she was rushed in this morning so just been able to eat something

Libby - Oh hum I am so sorry to hear it, are you by yourself do you need me to come?

Me - No Patricia is here, I haven't heard from Vinnie though, I've messaged but nothing has been said back to me

Libby - he will, he might just be still sleeping you know parties tire people out, I mean look at me after a night out haha

Me - deffo! haha

Libby was the worst when she had a good night out, she would wake up at like 3-5 pm and start her day as if she hadn't missed most of the day, she would also have 3 missed calls from me and maybe a few texts as well it was hilarious but also frustrating at that moment of time, I wish we were able to do that type of thing with Helena it would have been hilarious to come home late and wake up and have to walk over to Libby's and chuck water over her to wake her up Helena would have loved that.

"Hey! think it's probably best we get you back home and have a rest you've had a long and eventful day" Patricia broke me away from my phone and I looked up at her and nodded, "that's a good idea I am shattered," I said as she cleared the table and I met her at the door while I picked up my belongings.

The drive home was quiet, we did talk about much at all, we still don't talk about Helena as I think Patricia has been in contact with Vinnie's dad and they've been working with Vinnie's mum and how he should still be supporting Patricia and giving her the support that he should have been giving Helena when she needed it. what a woman. Other than that, we talk about everything except for the fact I am dying.