62. Andrew

I don't have anybody. You guys are all I have. You have to forgive me!

-Alex Karev

Getting out of her car, she slammed the door shut and got onto the land to see Derek pushing the wheelbarrow full of stones up the hill. Crossing her arms around herself to keep the heat from escaping, she narrowed her eyes and walked up to him, heeled boots squishing through the morning-dew-coated grass.

"You look nice," he said and she narrowed her eyes at him. "What's the occasion?"

"Why are you here?"

"I'm working on the house." Shaking her head, she shivered against the wind.

"Why are you here, and not at home with Meredith?" she asked because she had a perfectly good bed at home where it wasn't cold and it happened to have her attractive husband still sleeping. But the thought nagging at her, that Meredith could be fired, kept her awake so here she was.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Derek." Following after him to the deck, she spotted his car and climbed onto the front, letting her legs hang down as she watched him work. He dumped some cement or something onto the beginnings of the fireplace and set another stone on top. "Derek, she's my friend. In your mind, she's not your wife, she's my friend, and she's now my resident." The neurosurgeon paused and turned to her, setting the stone down.

Derek's lips pressed together as if recalling a moment, the moment his life changed. "She messed with the Alzheimer's trial."

.

"So, I went to Derek's land last week," Emily announced with a huff as she got into the on-call room. Mark looked up from his magazine as she collapsed onto his bed and snuggled up against him. "And he did tell me what happened before he kicked me off his land."

"Meredith messed up with his trial. I know. Hunt's with him too."

"So there's something going on with Cristina, too," she deduced against him and he chuckled, running a hand through her hair. "Everett wouldn't go to sleep and I had a surgery with Webber. Are the biopsy results back yet?"

"Nope." He popped the 'p', putting down the magazine and gazing down at her fondly. "Don't you have that breakfast thing? Chief Resident and stuff."

"Oh, yeah." She raised her head tiredly, hazel eyes flickering up to meet his. "Right. Crap."

"Come on, let's go." She got up with a groan and he sat beside her, pecking her temple before getting up and grabbing his coat. "Em,"

"Coming," she said, getting up and holding his hand as they headed to the cafeteria. A new group of interns, led by Lexie, passed them and the brunette mouthed frantic words at them. Emily snorted, laughing as Mark smirked. Running over her speech in her head, she said hello to Cristina. The Asian simply ignored her and Emily sighed.

"You the only one with a stable household at the moment? Saw Karev sleeping in a patient's room a few days back," Mark muttered in her ear and she glanced at him. She knew he was saying it as a teasing remark but she couldn't take it that way.

"Yeah. I think so," she commented softly before heading into the cafe. Fifth-year residents were lining up for breakfast foods and Mark headed straight for the muffins. Sitting down, she leaned her head against her hand and closed her eyes.

"Coffee?" Opening her eyes, she saw April offering her a steaming cup and smiled, sitting up.

"Thanks."

"You looked like you need it. You've been working your tail off since this whole thing started," the redhead chirped and Emily took a deep sip before sighing in relief. Just what she needed. "Are you going to make a speech?"

"I had one prepared but I don't think I need to. The residents can do whatever they want. They're already here, chatting with an attending and eating. Surgeons don't want to be welcomed by their new 'boss'." She bent two fingers with her free hand as quotation marks as April chuckled. "Have you found a mentor yet?"

"Uhm, no."

"Well, go. Don't bother sucking up to me," she joked and April gave a nervous laugh. "You don't know what you want to focus in?" Mark and Jackson passed, her husband holding an apple as Jackson gave her a wide-eyed pleading look. Help.

"Trauma." Callie was approaching the table with an omelette.

"Then go ask Hunt or Jacks." She shrugged, "I'm one-hundred percent sure that Jacks isn't taken and he'll gladly mentor anyone." April was red as they both glanced at the blond trauma surgeon who was talking to some other resident. The door opened and in came Owen Hunt. "And Hunt's good. They both have experience. It's really up to you. Go get 'em, tiger."

April nodded, jaw set and determined as Callie took her place. "Wow, you're really doing the whole encouraging Chief Resident thing." The two women watched as April approached Hunt. They started talking and found a table as Emily sent Callie a smile.

"When you become a mom, your patience is stretched to its limit," Callie laughed, digging into her breakfast. "Everett would not go to sleep so I am running on…" She held up the coffee— "this, and the fact that I might get my hands into some juicy trauma cases."

"Wait, so you're not even going to ask me to be your mentor?" Emily grinned at her friend, rolling her eyes.

"Do I even have to ask?"

.

"I got fired." Emily stopped from where she was about to put on her second rubber glove and turned around. Meredith was standing there, staring at Alex icily. The sirens were coming closer but she blocked it out as the words echoed in her ears. "The Chief fired me."

"You son of a bitch." Cristina turned to Alex, slugging him on the arm. "I mean, are you happy now?" Pushing him, she continued, "'Cause this is all because of you." Alex tried to escape the barrage but ended up pinned against the ambulance.

"Guys!" she yelled, hoping it'd be enough.

"You and your big, fat, stupid mouth! All your fault."

"Get off me!" Exhaling sharply, she walked over and shoved Cristina away.

"Hey! This isn't the time or place. Duke it out after." Her voice was low and Cristina met her eyes darkly. "Cristina." Levelling Alex with a glare as well, she watched as he went with the paramedics to the scene. She didn't want to see him anyways. As the rigs pulled up, she watched Meredith follow Bailey and Cristina as she went up with Lexie to the second patient.

She needed to take a deep breath. She could do this.

Meredith had no place in her head for now.

.

Working in the OR with Taylor was like something out of a dream. It was perfectly relaxing, going at a good pace and the patient was stable. Bailey swung in by and Emily looked up from where she was working on debriding the guy's arm.

"I need a resident with me today. And I am not babysitting a first-year." The woman was already in scrubs and ready to operate. Emily thought fast. Cristina was with Teddy, Alex was doing whatever it was. She didn't care - as long as he wasn't in the way. And Meredith…

She didn't work here anymore.

"Little Grey," she finally said. "She's free. Either her or April." The surgeon nodded and left with a swift and sarcastic 'thank you'. Sighing, she rolled back her shoulders and picked up the forceps when the intercom buzzed.

"Hey, Em." That voice. Looking up, she saw Meredith near the speaker, pressing the button. "I need you to reassign my cases so just sign 'em off when you have time." Taylor looked up when Emily's hands stalled. The brunette let her hands drop, resting against the table as she stared at the suction. She couldn't believe this.

"Mer, you can't give up like this," Emily pleaded, looking up at her friend. "Do you want me to put in a good word? You're a surgeon."

"No, it's okay. I have time. I'll wait."

"Make sure a nurse gets it to me then or something."

"Thanks, Em." Returning to her task, she nodded. The next time she looked up, Meredith was gone and Taylor was gazing at her.

"Chief Resident ain't being all it's cracked up to be," he said a matter-of-factly. "You look like you haven't slept in ages."

"And you look like you haven't slept on a good bed in years," she shot back. There were a few too many times she had caught him in an on-call room several nights in a row. "You and Lex still having fights?"

"No," he lied quickly and she snorted. "Family crap. Kids or not. Same old." The blond relented, "I love the hell out of her."

"Me, too. Which is why I don't want you forcing her into anything. I love the both of you." Her voice was soft as the two surgeons began to finish up.

"3-0 vicryl. So what do I do?" he asked as if she were the wise one. Really, she wasn't. "Since you now have a kid, are Chief Resident, and happily married."

"Really?" She rolled her eyes. The O.R. phone blared and a nurse picked it up.

"Dr. Bailey is paging you to the E.R., Dr. Moore. It's urgent," the nurse reported and Emily groaned. She didn't want to go down to the pit today.

"I'm on my way," she said anyways and headed to the scrub room. Taylor chuckled as the brunette shoved her O.R. gown into the bin with annoyance.

.

"Hey, gunther," she teased, coming up to Jackson who rolled his eyes. "Aren't you amazing?"

"Shut up," he complained, only half-joking. He was heading into the nurse's station near the lobby. "Sloan went all pedo-dad on me in there."

"I heard. April told me." She glanced into the office where April was doing her charts. Hunt had stacked on cases for the redhead to deal with pressure under a strict deadline. The woman was working furiously and Jackson smiled at his friend. "Sorry about it. At least he likes you now, right?" He scoffed.

"Have you talked to Karev?"

"No. I want to but I need to go talk to Mark." He gave her a nod before going inside the office. She continued on her way and went to the nursery where Mark was holding Everett while sitting on a beanbag. Crashing down beside him on a red beanbag, she nudged her chair closer to his and leaned against him, crossing one leg over the other.

Everett cooed upon seeing his mom. Letting go of Mark's finger, he batted his hands in her direction. Mark smirked, kissing his son's nose. In response, Everett stuck out his tongue, eyes squinting close and Emily took out her phone, snapping pictures of her son. Her photo album was already full of him but she just needed more.

"Hey, Em," Mark mumbled after a while, kissing her temple and she sighed, enjoying the time she had with her family. It seemed there were very few times recently where Mark wasn't burdened with the weight of his dad. Mark felt Everett getting restless and changed his position so he stopped cradling him and held him so Everett's head rested on his shoulder. He cradled his bum and held his back as Emily tickled the baby's cheek.

"Dr. Moore, Dr. Sloan?" a new voice interrupted them after almost twenty minutes of alone time. It was an intern with a sheet of paper.

"Dr. Bailey wanted me to give you this. She said I shouldn't page you. That it's extremely important." The two surgeons looked at each other before standing up. Everett was placed back in his crib, already nearly asleep and Emily leaned over to kiss her son goodbye.

"I'll see you in a bit, sweetheart." She had to tear herself away as Mark grabbed the paper. They exited the nursery when he paused.

"I'm scared." Blue met hazel and she cupped his face, turning him to look at her. Determination against fear.

"I know. But no matter what, you have us."

They stood there for a moment, neither moving. Then there was a squeeze of the hand and he let go, gripping the paper so hard it crinkled. He read the words before coming completely limp.

"He has a malignant sarcoma in his heart that's metastasized to the lungs and kidney. Carcinoma. Em… it's bad. His white blood cell count—" His voice turned bitter and angry— "he should've gotten help sooner."

"Do you want to see him?" she asked and hugged him. Running her hands along the inside of his lab coat and settling on his back, she listened to his heart beating in his chest. "To yell at him? Do you want to operate? Sex? Our son?" Pulling her head back, she searched his eyes. "Tell me what I can do."

He kissed her softly on the lips, gently before pressing their foreheads together.

"We can go see Meredith and Derek," he said and she raised her eyebrows.

"What happened?" He sighed, looking away.

"It's something to do with the adoption." Nodding, the Sloans headed for the Shepherds. It seemed families were crumbling all around them. Including the hospital itself.

.

"Hey, Alex." She perched on the edge of the bed as the surgeon avoided looking into her eyes. "You gonna talk to me?"

"Shouldn't you be mad? Furious?" he asked shortly and she sighed.

"I am mad. I am so fucking mad that this has happened. You cost Meredith her job, and now they might lose a baby but you're on my team. Chief Resident and all that. Besides—" A slight smile— "you were my drinking buddy. You are my drinking buddy. I know you didn't mean for all of this to happen." Alex finally regarded her, nervous. Shaking her head, she unwrapped her stethoscope. "Sit up." When he didn't move, she glowered at him. "Now." He finally pushed himself up and she took his vitals. "You're fine."

"I knew that." He flopped back down and he sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. "I just want to take it all back." Crossing her arms, she stared at him. "If they lose Zola, it's gonna be on me."

"It is on you. And it's on Meredith. And it's on Webber," she said, relenting at last. "You can't take all the blame because of what you saw." Retreating to the door, she turned to throw some last words over her shoulder. "Get some sleep. Cristina told me she's gonna run an EKG."

"Em-"

"Dr. Yang will be here in an hour or so." Exiting the room, she went to find Mark and pick up their son.

.

Her damn phone was ringing. Where was it? Emily reached blindly for the phone on her night stand. "What is that?" Mark groaned against her neck and she grunted as she finally found the damn thing. Blinking, she made a face at the bright screen.

"What?" she complained, closing her eyes and flopping back down as Mark mumbled something and hugged her closer.

"Sorry, were you sleeping?"

"Ugh, Noah, I love you but you're super inconvenient. I just got Chief Resident and I have a baby. I'm tired."

"I wish this could wait but something just happened." His voice was serious and she sat up. She was wearing her most comfy pajamas, and Mark wanted to hug her like a teddy bear. His arm tightened around her waist and Emily smiled when his face buried into her waist. "We need to talk."

"Mark, I'll be in the living room," she told her husband. After detaching herself from her husband, who made a sound of acknowledgement before rolling into her space and taking up the whole bed, she slipped on a robe to keep herself warm. Walking into the living room, she switched on the lights before sitting on the red love chair near the fireplace. Tucking her knees into her chest to maintain heat, she leaned against the back cushion, eyes still droopy. "Okay, I'm-"

A baby's cry pierced the air and Emily groaned.

"Go get him." Noah sounded impatient so Emily walked as fast as she could as quietly as she could into the spare bedroom that had been transformed into a nursery. Ever since they've been searching a for a new house, the nursery has been bland with only a crib and a changing table.

Everett was wailing and Emily picked him up. He burrowed his saliva covered and tear infested face into her shoulder and she thanked God she was wearing a thick shirt. "I'm here, I'm here." Returning to her seat with her son, she picked up the phone once more. "Noah?"

Someone was speaking in the background and her stomach dropped when she realized she could understand every single word from the voice.

"Noah, con chi stai parlando?" She knew that voice. She had woken up to that voice before. She had dreamt of hearing that voice for so long...

"Noah?" she hissed and he finally returned to the speaker after a quiet remark in the same language. "Why does that sound like-"

"It's Mom." She hadn't heard Italian in so long… not since Dad left Mom. Dad was French, Mom was Italian. Being fluent in two languages had always given her an upperhand. But now… now she felt confused. She felt bitter. She felt… she felt alone. "She's been admitted." Holding her son closer, she closed her eyes.

"What?"

"I don't know how or why. I just saw her and… I don't know." He sounded so lost and Emily wanted to stand and punch a wall. Her mother… the one who left her. Who was supposed to be strong for them. Who just left. She hasn't seen her mother in… nearly fifteen years.

"What are we going to do?"

"She has a new family. Do we even have to care?"

"She what?" Her voice cracked like a whip. Offended and disgusted, she stood and paced back and forth as Everett dozed off. "So she up and leaves and then starts a new family. I never knew what happened. If they divorced… or…"

"I know. I just thought I needed to tell you. No one knows yet except us. Do you want to-"

"What's wrong with her?"

"I don't know. I… I know you can't leave but we can transfer her to Seattle. If you want."

"Noah… Mark's dad is here. I can't. There'll be too much conflict," she argued and he was silent on the other end. "Noah, if it's really Mom - I can't. She has another family. She doesn't need us anymore."

"Em-"

"She left me alone. I don't want to see her," she snapped loudly and Everett woke up. Without realizing it, her eyes began to burn. Everett began to cry louder than before and she frantically tried to calm him down.

"Dr. Moore, she's asking for you," a new voice came into hearing. It was younger and sounded nervous.

"I'll be there in a moment, Andrew."

"And who was that?" she asked hotly as Noah turned back.

"And that… was our half-brother."

Fuck.

A/N: Edited - December 1, 2018

Next: Emily revisits her old haunts and learns more of her mother's sudden reappearance.