Hand in hand.
Team listens to Win filling him in about the 1st year and Dean, he feels guilty thinking that if he hadn't baited the kid he wouldn't have taken it the way he did. He also felt guilty about the fact that he was not wrong, he and Win were basically mixing club and personal relationships. He wondered if anyone else in the club felt this way. It made him uncomfortable, he didn't want people to think that he received special treatment because of who he was seeing. He remembers the night that he had almost drowned and realized that he had in-fact gotten special treatment because of Win, he would have been expelled and lost his scholarship if Win didn't step in to save him. Shit.
Win notices the look on Teams face when he enters the room, "What's wrong?"
"The kid was right Hia, I have been benefiting from the relationship I have with you. I don't want to be that guy. The day I almost drowned, my swimming career at the university should have ended but you..." Teams sighs dropping his head in his hands.
"This is not the same thing Team, you didn't violate another person. You need to remember that what he did was a criminal offense, in front of the whole swim club. He did this to the president of all people. If it were you who did that, even now as we are in a relationship and as much as I love you, if you did that to anyone, even someone who is not on the team, I would report you myself." He walks over to his boyfriend and sits behind him, putting his arms around him and gently rubbing his arms up and down. Win knows too well that once Team starts thinking, its hard to bring him out of it. "What you did hurt you, nobody else got hurt. Yes everyone deserves a second chance for being an idiot but since this boy has gotten here all he does is cause trouble. I understand where you are coming from and I know that you and I are probably hypocrites for dating and being in the same club but there is no rule against this in the club."
"Do you think there should be one? I just don't want people to think of me in that way. I work hard to get the perfect times. I practice so much, even when I don't have to so I can prove that I am the best. But when something like this comes out in the open, everything I have achieved will be over shadowed by this. The reputation you worked hard for Hia will also be thrown aside. People will forget all the sweat you put into the club, they will forget the dedication and love you have for the club. I don't want that." Team finishes his sentence and grabs Win hands and wraps it around himself tightly, burying himself deeper into Wins chest.
Team was so busy in his thoughts he didn't realize Win frozen in place. His mind is racing and he can feel is breath catch in his chest, almost painful. Win holds Team close and asks the question plaguing his mind. "Do you want us to break up?" Team lifts himself up in a second, unintentionally hitting Wins chin with his head causing his mouth to slam shut, biting down on his lip so hard in the process, Win tastes blood. "Ouch, careful. What's wrong with you?" Win rubs his chin, damn his head is hard.
Team turns to face his boyfriend, crossing his legs. "What's wrong with me? What's wrong with you?!" Team is almost shouting. "You think you can leave me? Think again Hia, I wont let you." What is he even talking about? When did he say that? He deserves to be pinched hard.
Win looks at his boyfriend who looks mad, "Well, did you not just say there should be a rule that dating in the club should be banned and that you don't want this to affect your hard work? Why are you angry? You are so confusing!" Win is usually the smartest person in any room that he walks into to but when it comes to his man he can never understand him. Dating Team is like being in a car accident every second. He swears he has whip lash from all the different directions this boys mind takes.
"I'm just thinking, why does your mind always go the worst scenario first? You think the club is more important then you? I would rather leave the university and continue my swimming somewhere else then to leave you. Besides no matter where I am, you will be my coach so I will definitely be the top swimmer." He climbs off the best and heads to his backpack taking out a pack of tissue. He shoves it in the direction of his boyfriend. He narrows his eyes and pouts, making sure Win knows he is irritated.
Win listens intently at the words coming from Team, his heart calms down. Thank heavens. He lets Teams words wash over him, he looks at his boyfriend intensely, studying his face to make sure he doesn't say anything stupid again. To be honest what he said was totally unrealistic and he would be mad too if Team said that to him but he cant help but feel insecure for some reason. Why is this so hard? He has never been the person to just say anything, Win usually thinks before he says anything, knowing that words spoken can affect the outcome of every situation. He takes the tissue from him, "Team, come here. I'm sorry. I was just thinking too and my mind was running away from me I guess."
"No thanks, I'm going for a walk. I just want to calm down a little bit, I will be right back." And with that he turns and leaves. He needs to clear his mind. For the first time in a long time he felt scared, genuine fear that Win would leave him. He knows what he said would make any normal person think the way Hia did and he doesn't blame him but this is just so intense for him. He has never been in love and never let anyone in. He had to calm his nerves or he would strangle Win. "Asshole, stupid, idiot." he keeps talking to himself until he notices that people are starting to look at him. He smiles sheepishly feeling embarrassed, he finds a place to sit near the water. Now that he thinks about it, it wasn't even that serious but simply hearing the words breakup coming from Win was enough to cause him pain. So this what love is he thinks to himself, it makes you irrational and dumb. His heart is still racing, he puts his hand over his chest and closes his eyes. "Calm down Team, you can do it, Breathe in, out." He is trying to get his beating heart to stop racing. He got so worked up over nothing.
******
Win rubs the bridge between his nose trying to release some of the tension. He falls onto his back and stares at the ceiling. Teams face runs through his mind, he saw fear in the boys eyes. "Shit." He knows he needs to go find him but he needs to calm down first, its not a good option to leave Team to his thoughts, he gets himself all tied up in knots. But Team was not the only one that experienced fear in that moment. From the moment Team asked him if he thinks there should be a no dating rule he became scared. He would never be able to give him up. He also wants Team to reach the highest peak he can and hearing him ready to give up the university he loves, his friends, all because he would rather keep Win doesn't sit well with him. He would never allow him to make sacrifices like that for him. He knew dating within the club would be challenging but he has managed to keep it professional so far, a few transgressions here and there but nothing that would affect or hurt anyone. This kid is really testing the strength of his and Teams relationship.
******
Team just sits and looks at the sea, he doesn't even know how long his been sitting here. "Are you okay Son?" He turns and sees an elderly couple standing behind him and looking at him with concern. He smiles at them warmly thinking they are so cute. "Yes Sir, I am okay. Thank you."
"May we join you?"
The woman looks so kind, "Sure." He watches the man take the lady's hand and make sure she is comfortable before taking a seat beside her. Team smiles hoping that he and Win will be them in the future, old and grey but still so loving to each other. He scans the lines around the woman's smile, she has laughed a lot in her life he thinks to himself. The look the woman gives the older man as she squeezes his hand is one of pure love and content.
"We are here to celebrate being together for 50 years. We got married on this very beach." The man tells Team.
Team is amazed, 50 years together and they still look like they are on their honeymoon. "Congratulations. I wish I can achieve what you have." The woman holds out her hand to Team and he hesitates, he watches her nod and he takes her hand.
"I saw you looking lost and insisted we come over and talk to you. I saw you and your boyfriend earlier at the restaurant." The woman states quietly.
Team doesn't deny that Win is his boyfriend but he becomes embarrassed and pulls his hand away gently before turning back to the view. "Thank you. I needed the company." He throws a smile in her direction. Feeling a bit uncomfortable in this situation. He is afraid of being judged by these people because he has a boyfriend, knowing this is unlikely because the don't give off the vibe of being rude or judgmental. He knows he is being silly. "I'm sorry. We are just having a time out to calm down." Without even realizing Team finds himself opening up about their conversation and telling them the story of how they got to this point. Expecting an answer he hears only waves crashes against the rocks and turns to look at the couple who are eyeing him warmly. He notices Win standing being the couple.
The lady gestures for him to come sit next to them. "We made it this far because we respected each other. Every opinion, thought, action is respected between the two of us. When he crosses the line I say so. When I do something he doesn't like, he says so. This way we grew to understand each other better. I didn't change for him and he didn't change for me, we grew together, adjusting for each other. There is no 50-50 in a relationship because on some days you will give 70% and he will give 30% , the same goes for him, he may give 90% on one day and you will give 10% but you must remember that at the end of each day what you both have is still 100%. One day you will wake and realize that 20 years has passed in the blink of an eye, you will look back at your life and remember all the things that brought you two together, its up to you whether you make that reflection one of joy or sorrow."
"There was many times when we hurt each other, we never had a perfect relationship because they don't exist. You boys will have to face twice as much as we did because you are going against the normal box society trues to fit us in, but I promise you if you can rely on each other and fight for one another, there is nothing that you cannot achieve together." He wakes up and puts his hand out to his lady, "I think our job here is done honey, how about some ice-cream?" She smiles up at him and takes his hand.
Win and Team watch the couple walk hand in hand away from them, their eyes meet, without speaking, so much is being communicated through just a look.
Team holds out his hand and Win takes it. He sits silently next to his boyfriend looking at the waves emanating his inner heart, replaying the words spoken by the couple. Both boys sit in silence hand in hand deep in thought, Team puts his head on Wins shoulder not ready to speak, knowing Win is feeling the same.
Win turns and plants a kiss on Teams head, squeezing his hand. Nothing has ever seemed so beautiful to him before. He savors this feeling, knowing moments like this are hard to come by. They don't need words to communicate their feelings, all they need is each other hand in hand.