Capítulo 5

He hugged me and then kissed my forehead, I felt tickled all over my body just at that moment when he separated his lips from that area of my body, I found it quite tender, surely I would treasure that moment as a very valuable memory for me. I think I had never gone through this before in my life, as my previous relationship was a bit complicated, not to mention the fact that I preferred to keep in touch with people online rather than having to deal with them.

~ From the moment I told you about my experience before I met you I knew I couldn't be completely honest with you, I don't know, it was an impulse, maybe... maybe I just didn't want to burden you or give you more insecurities than you already had, I wanted with all my strength to be your safe place, that you would trust me like you never did before, during the whole relationship I always wanted to be the woman who would be with you in your good times, in the bad times, and in the worst.

Poor deluded, again. I should have understood that you didn't love me, that you never got to love me the way I loved you, I was able to put my beliefs aside for you William, why not you, why were you never able to accept your mistakes and work on them? Because yes, you must accept that you made them over and over again, that's why we are like this now, separated. You happy with someone else and me... me trying to get you out of my head ~.

I love you too much. - I mentioned while I also leaned down to kiss her forehead.

You are too beautiful to be with someone like me. - I don't know why he was saying those things, but I wouldn't keep the doubts, I would just have to know.

Why did you say that? - I asked curious, maybe he wouldn't tell me, but I had to try, it's not like now that we officially started a relationship we had to be honest with each other, but he has already left me intrigued with what he said.

_ I promise that when I'm ready I'll tell you all my secrets, but now, beautiful, I need you to come with me, I have a surprise for you. - he commented smiling while looking directly into my eyes.

1 month later

Today William would come to the house, which made me really nervous, he practically wanted to ask my parents for permission so we could be boyfriend and girlfriend, according to him, our relationship wouldn't be official until we told them, but we would be almost a month, that still counted, didn't it? Because for me, for me every time at his side counted.

I had not wanted to say anything to my parents about William's visit, I was a little afraid that they would reject his arrival or that they would reproach me for not telling them earlier, I thought it would be better if he arrived by surprise. For my part, I was so nervous that I just followed my father wherever he went, but I was with him, my mother on her side was watering the flowers, she was a fan of them and liked to keep the yard of the house decorated with them.

I saw the car in the distance, passing by outside my house, I think he had forgotten where it was, but it didn't matter, I quickly left him a message to remind him that it was further back, I recognized him as soon as I saw him, suddenly my nerves took over my body and a huge knot took over my stomach, I knew that this could go well or, on the contrary, it could end quite badly.

William parked the vehicle and when he got out of the car I stayed watching him for a few seconds and then escaped to the kitchen, I smiled sideways while I put water to boil to prepare what would be the first coffee of the day, suddenly I heard my mother calling me half annoyed to tell me to prepare everything to give breakfast to my boyfriend, clearly she didn't say it that way, but well... I wasn't going to deny anything now that I was already dating Will, when I saw him enter my heart beat strongly again, like when he has kissed me for the first time, a unique experience.

~ During the journey of this book you may realize many things that we lived, let me tell you that one of the things I loved the most was when you came to see me, at least before I got pregnant, many times I waited for your message; "Love, I'm coming". God knows how many times I was anxiously waiting for your car to show up in front of the gate, I would excitedly leave my house looking for you just to be wrapped in your arms, in those arms that many nights gave me warmth ~.

Hello - I mentioned smiling at him as I approached him, I wanted to kiss him and settle in his arms, but I was afraid of mom's reaction, after all they didn't know anything, so we'd better wait for their permission to show our love to everyone here and to everyone we know, at least that's what I thought.

_ Hi. - he answered approaching me and depositing a kiss on my forehead, I felt a shiver run through my body, I tried to hide my reaction, but I think it was very noticeable, I wanted more, I wanted his lips, ever since I had had a taste of them I had not wanted to stop having them over and over again with me, tasting them.

My mom left the kitchen to talk to my dad, I just hoped he wasn't mad at me for keeping William's visit from him, but they had to understand that this was the way, right? If I had done the opposite, they would have surely told me another day or would have harassed me with uncomfortable questions that I would have to answer alone, now, at least, he was there to help me and give me support...

_ I'm nervous. - I mentioned smiling when he took my hand and intertwined our fingers, what was I doing, they could see us and this whole coldly calculated plan would be thrown away! Note the sarcasm used in my thoughts. - I want this all to work out, love. - I added, smiling shyly.

I am too, love. - commented William smiling on the side. - More than you told me how strict your parents were, I don't want to have problems with them, remember that you are still seventeen and I am already twenty four. - he mentioned and I felt how my eyes started to sting, yes, I was afraid he would decide to leave and leave me all alone, I wasn't sure I could bear to be without him right now.

Suddenly I felt his smile and I looked up to observe him, he was indeed smiling and, looking me fixedly in the eyes, he put one of his hands on my cheek, to caress it with his fingertips causing me thousands of sensations that filled my soul completely.

I wouldn't want to have to separate us because of my parents' lack of approval, Will. - I commented smiling sideways as I hid my face in a corner of her neck, I felt her body shudder, god I think this was a point of her body quite different from the rest.

_ Everything will be fine, love, and if they don't want us to be together we will do it on the sly, because I won't give up on you, I love you, and don't you ever forget it. - he added smiling and I believed him, I believed him because I had hopes that he was sincere, that this time everything would be all right for me, for both of us? I wanted to believe him, in each of his words.

~ I believed him... I believed you William, I believed that you would always be with me, that you wouldn't give up on our love. Unfortunately it wasn't like that. Now we are on separate paths that no matter how much we want to move away from each other, will always end up coming together for a specific and beautiful reason, the only reason that is a witness of the love we once professed to each other, because yes, I felt it, you loved me like maybe you never loved anyone, but you stopped doing it, you let people get in the way of our relationship, instead I... I turned a deaf ear to the comments that reached me about you, sometimes I wonder if I should have listened to them, if I should not have given myself so much, but what's the use anymore? The damage is done, William. And neither you nor I can change it.

There is only one thing left, to take care of our offspring, the one we didn't expect, but that has filled me with happiness all this time, that has made our separation more bearable, because even though I deny it in front of everyone, a part of me, that part that dreams of a united family full of love... that part still loves you like a crazy woman... a crazy woman capable of believing in your false words of love again ~.

And I love you too. - I whispered while my cheeks reddened like the color of a tomato. - As I told you a few days ago, I gave you my heart, only you know if you want to take care of it or destroy it. - I added as I stared into his eyes.

I'd rather hurt myself a thousand times than have you suffer for someone like me. - he mentioned taking my cheeks in his hands and caressing them slowly and painfully. - I will always take care of you my darling, have no doubt about that. - he added, this time kissing my forehead.

I got up from my chair and settled between his legs, I wanted to do this, but I didn't know exactly how I should do it. I needed to feel his lips with mine again, they were so addictive that I felt I would die if one more second passed without kissing him.

_ I love you. - I whispered between his lips as our tender and passionate kiss came to an end.

~ I had never kissed anyone in my own home, you took the credits for that, William. I felt special, I felt unique, I felt like it was just going to be you and me, just like it said in a movie, I felt like my world would begin and end with you and it was a hard blow to realize that things will never be the same again ~.