Ep. 73 - Quick Trip Start, Perfectly Unbalanced

Ok, so… Today I am going on a quick trip. I have found a couple of universes that may or may not have interesting knowledge and abilities, so I will visit them and appraise them.

I created a portal and entered it after stopping time in this universe. Since I am so much more powerful, I stopped time for my friends as well. I am such a great God, aren't I?

Anyway, I found myself in space. I used my Omniscience and found exactly where I am: Age 779, Dragon Ball Universe 7, somewhere in the 'North' side of the universe. I also took all information on Ki, techniques, and transformations.

Techniques are pretty much useless to me except to train my control, though I don't actually need to train thanks to my 'Empyros' Skill, which includes a Skill that was something like 'Instant Adaptation' or something like that. Well, it's basically 'Instant Mastery'.

Since I am here mainly for the powers, I started my usual thing and pushed some Good Ki, Evil Ki, Godly Ki, Evil Godly Ki, God of Destruction Ki, God of Creation Ki, which I just created to oppose the Destruction one, Stealth Ki, which is the one used by the Trio of Danger, and a couple more that are pretty much the same thing. I made sure to balance each of the 'good' Ki's with the same amount of 'evil' Ki's.

My heart started pumping out all of that Ki at an incredible rate, as always. Since that was steadily increasing my Battle Power, which should already be unmeasurable, I decided to test a little hypothesis.

I created a sample of S-cells and modified them a little with all of my knowledge, to perfect them and adapt them. I made it so that they automatically reproduce and act as a source of energy, which means I can use my heart to cheat. I also took away all of the things that would have affected my personality or habits, like gorging on food or being a warmonger. Oh, I also eliminated any physical change like pointy hair, overly-muscular bodies, and so on. Then, once I was done, I decided to assimilate the sample.

Thanks to my little modifications, my heart also started producing S-cells at an astonishing rate. I could also tell that they were replicating on their own. This is perfect, but how do I go Super Saiyan? Actually, I'll call it Super Empyrean (SE for short) since the S-cells are absolutely different from the original and I am an Empyrean… Yeah, anyway, how do I use them?

I mean, I can feel these cells all over my body, not only in my back. Fuck it, I'll fill my body with all the energies I have. If that doesn't work, then fuck Super Empyrean.

I started pumping out energy and boom! Super Empyrean. I mean, there was no explosion, but my hair color changed. More energy, and I went SE 2, SE 3, all the way up to whatever I wanted. I didn't theoretically have a limit on the number of SE strengthenings, but they were pretty useless to me.

I tried going SE God, the red one, you know? Well, I have no idea how to do it, so I thought of transforming into SE God and my energy responded. How good is it to be an Omnipotent God? Very good.

SE Blue was pretty nice. I started to feel the impact these transformations had. Like, what was this, 3000-5000 times more powerful than usual? Yeah, around that much. I tried going SE Rosé, and I did it. It was a solid 4000-4500 times better than usual.

SE Blue Evolved was also very nice. This was probably the most natural that I had tried until now, probably since it boosts a mortal's power to the power of a Godly being. But… It's not enough. More power, now. I pumped out continuously more power and switched forms every time I found a new one. My hair color was pretty much a rave party and changed from yellow, pink, violet, blue, red, white, to green, and so on.

I stopped at a state I felt was more than enough, yet I could still go much further beyond. Since my hair was mainly white, I called it SE 'White Slate'. It will be something I can fully explore as I wish, therefore a 'white slate'. I also tried Ultra Instinct. And it complemented my White Slate form perfectly. Well, it wasn't much of an actual 'ultra instinct', just a subconscious, autonomous use of Omniscience, though a much more unrefined and degraded one. I created a new technique based on Ultra Instinct that makes use of my own 'real' Omniscience. I also added a few other techniques from other universes that could make it better. I called it 'Ultra Instinct Perfected'.

Since I was done with that, for the moment, I decided to address the next objective in this universe. Dragon Balls? Do I look like I need some low-level being to get something? Heh, I came here for a maid! You see, there is a certain Angel that currently serves a fat cat. I am interested in the girl, so I will have her.

I quickly used Omniscience and found that the Tournament would be held in 5 weeks, give or take. I sped up time and used my powers to arrive at the correct time. To be honest, I am surprised that no one came to check out who caused those power surges aka who transformed like crazy. Well, I guess they immediately understood that I am a higher being compared to them and gave up.

At any rate, the time for the tournament arrived. I obviously wasn't invited, but do I care? Absolutely fucking not! I teleported to their location, more precisely behind Vados. Goddamn she's hot. I sneaked behind her and poked her cheek. These Gods of Destruction suck, they didn't even notice me. creeping, like, right next to them.

"Hello, little Vados! Interested in becoming my maid?" I said, not bothering to acknowledge the other people.

I saw everyone on the couch thing jump and get ready to fight. Vados looked at me confused, while Champa was about to spout some bullshit that would no-doubt infuriate me.

"You stay silent, kitty-cat. Do not piss me off and you might just stay alive."

Vados seemed to snap out of whatever she was thinking and said: "I don't seem to have invited you to this private tournament. Who would you be?"

"Oh, that is very easy, Vados dear. I am an Empyrean. Consider your dear Zeno. I am a few steps above him. Actually, make that a few flights of stairs. You can call me Tula." I said, then Merlin materialized next to me. "And she is Merlin, my Spirit and wife." I finished while sitting on my throne. "Continue, mortals. Entertain me before I take Vados with me."

Then Champa exploded: "You bast-" then he exploded for real. Over and over I made him explode and reconstruct.

"I remember saying 'you stay silent'. Did I not speak in your language? Tell me Vados, I am speaking your language, am I?"

"Y-yes, sir!"

"Good! Oh, seems like your brothers are finally realizing that something is wrong. Vados, as your first duty as my maid, explain the situation to those two. I will make Champa here explode a few more times, then we could resume this tournament." I said and started cuddling with Merlin.

Vados acted as instructed and went to explain the situation. I could see that Beerus was scared as hell. Someone that can make a God of Destruction explode and revive on command is definitely on Zeno's level if not superior.

I had Champa explode a few more times, then stopped the process. He was scared, shivering, panting, confused. I made a clone of myself to slap him.

"Concentrate, Champa. Do not interrupt me and follow instructions. Maybe I won't have you explode again." He nodded repeatedly. "Good kitty. I am going to take Vados with me after this tournament. From now on, she is my maid. You and your brother will continue the Tournament as if nothing was happening. Oh, but before that..."

I looked at the Frieza rip-off and had him dissolve into nothingness. I then made a synthetic Saiyan that could maintain SS Blue Evolved constantly for an indefinite amount of time, use 'Ultra Instinct Perfected', and particularly high regeneration. Oh, and completely loyal to me. Basically, a super-powered version of Goku.

"Here, take this 'replacement'. I guarantee that he is much better than the previous one. You can name him, I have no interest in his fate."

At any rate, the Tournament was pretty uninteresting. I could feel Vados' rising tension, which was quite amusing, really. I will explain a few things to her, but that can wait. I was actually watching some fights. These guys really know their stuff when it comes to fighting. I was developing a few more techniques based on what I was seeing. I also read the mind of all the warriors here, so that I could get the most out of this universe. It was actually really fun for me who rules over knowledge. Since I was in the mood, I compiled a grimoire with the useful information on me and the gang for Vados. And, no, I am not worried of her betraying me or anything. First, she and anyone else in this universe were unable to travel to new ones. Second, they are ridiculously weak for a fighting-centered place. I mean, Zeno is barely around Creation or Ancestor God Realm! Sure, that is still a sizable rat, but nothing worrying. Any of my maids could easily kill him like the vermin he is.

"Vados, take this. It will clear most of the doubts you have regarding your new job. It will also give you a new outlook on your strength… Or, should I say weakness?" I said. "Don't worry, strength is something I can easily give-" and I gave her the 'Ultra Instinct Perfected' and had her produce my new S-cells. "-and something I can easily take." and I took all of her strength. I let her understand what happened before giving her power back, along with the new techniques I came up with, 'Ultra Instinct Perfected', and the S-cells.

She took my grimoire, which shined and allowed her to understand many things. This calmed her down and made her think that being my maid might actually not be a bad idea: better working conditions, better boss, interesting adventures, easy power-ups, better prospectives if she catches anyone's attention. Well, I might actually give her a promotion because she is hot. And also because I checked her mind and she is actually a really sweet person. Shitty world that forces people into shitty positions.

Well, the Tournament ended and that idiot Zeno arrived. Vados was about to go meet him as her training orders, then she remembered about her new job, so she looked at me.

"You don't have to go. Actually, why don't we change your clothes?" I said and changed her clothes to the maid uniform the other girls are using. "There, much better!"

"Hm… Now she looks the part, though Amethyst will still have to educate her…" said Merlin, appraising the new addition to the group.

Champa was sweating bullets, but I couldn't care less. Though…

"Vados, would you feel sad if Universe 6 got destroyed?"

She thought a little, then said: "No, not really, Master. I am just supposed to assist the God of Destruction, but have no real attachment to the universe."

"Good, then I don't really have to do anything. And… 'Master', huh? You sure adapted fast. Luminous still took Amethyst's education program before calling me that. Milim is still reluctant to do so, even now."

While we were talking, Zeno noticed Vados' actions and questioned Champa. When he heard the story, he tried eliminating me. Obviously he couldn't do it. I on the other hand made him disintegrate and reappear over and over again. This will continue for ten million years, then he will be free.

"You insolent child. You have tried killing me, yet look at you now. Fuck. You. You football-head! Suffer for ten million years!" I shouted, so that everyone could hear me. "Vados, we are leaving now. Otherwise I might just destroy everything in this shithole. Anything you want to take with you?"

"No, Master, I am ready when you are."

Since she said that, I created a portal towards a new universe. Fucking football-head ruined my mood. Wait, this is strange: I have never lost my cool this much. I might have miscalculated the effect Ki has.

After stepping out of the portal we found ourselves in front of a flying carrier. You can bet your sweet cheeks that we were in the Marvel universe. I used my Omniscience to check and we were in the MCU. I got all the knowledge available, including the Infinity Stones and all those sweet realms from which people can draw out power. I assimilated a copy of the Infinity Stones, which did improve my control over their respective attributes, but they weren't anything major that would cause an evolution. I also copied those realms into my Inner World, but that didn't really do much. I did start producing some more energies, that is for sure. Dammit! It was kinda fun evolving and reaching new heights…

"Vados, Merlin. I think I will mess around with these mortals a little since I am pissed because of that football-headed child."

"I will come with you. I want to see how we can fuck with them." said Merlin

"I will also follow you, Master. I am your maid after all." said Vados.

We flew to the helicarrier and were met with a group of soldiers. I ignored them and strode forward… Not before I changed half of them to females and had them go into heat. Fuck you, I need some entertainment. I strode into the command room-thing and found the Avengers assembled there.

"Hm… These will make some good stress-relievers…" I muttered. I immediately changed Tony Stark into Tonia Stark. Well, I should never give another name, ever. Changed Banner into the Hulk, then made him do some ballet, got the Black Widow to serve me some alcohol while I sat on my throne, had Captain America start doing push-ups as fast as he could, and finally, I had Thor give some 'shocking' experiences to his brother Loki, who I had just summoned. I enjoyed this show for a while, before a fucking cyclops pirate shot me.

"Not cool, man. Not cool at all. I am watching a show, can't you see?" I said, continuing to observe how Tonia was facing an existential crisis, Hulk was prancing around, smashing stuff, Black Widow that was gritting her teeth, probably trying to move her body, Cap was sweating like crazy and was trying to talk about how this wasn't nice and we could find a solution. Oh, Loki was about to die a couple of times, so I healed him and had his brother continue the electro-shock therapy.

"Fury, you are facing a real God, not an alien like those two idiots. I am someone that can create and destroy universes by sneezing. Actually, I don't even need to sneeze to do that. I am a real God: Omnipotent, Omniscient, Omnipresent. Do you think a gun could ever hurt me?" I asked towards the pirate.

Oh, all of the SHIELD agents were frozen in time. Wouldn't want anyone else intruding on my fun. I left Fury so that he could see how powerless he is.

"A God, huh? Bullshit. You motherfucker are just some alien with a complex. Now stop messing around and answer my questions." He said, then pointed his gun at me again.

"This guy is a lost cause. Can I kill him, Master?" said Vados. She didn't like Fury at all.

"You can break a few of his bones, but leave him alive." I said and immediately heard several cracks. I muted him since I didn't want to hear the guy screaming like a little bitch.

Hm… This is getting boring. I turned all the members of the Avengers back to normal.

"I will allow you one request each, think of it as a payment for the good show. But… Do not overstep your bounds, mortals." I said.

"Who the hell are you?!" said Loki, more like shouted.

"Shut it, mortal!" said Merlin and started twisting his body and turning him to mush. "Whoever disrespects my Master will face a similar fate."

"You said you are a God, right? Then how about you give me some interesting tech from another universe?" said Tony.

"Sure." I said and materialized a USB Drive. "Inside here is knowledge of an entire universe, filled with alien races with advanced tech. You know, Tony… I like you, no homo. I am the God of Knowledge, so you are an interesting mortal to me. Take my blessings as well."

The blessings will allow him to wield the Infinity Stones, live longer, learn faster, have more ideas, and a couple more. It will also help stabilize his soul and prevent panic attacks.

"Then… can you make Penny young again?" asked Cap.

"Sure thing." I said and snapped my fingers, showing him Penny's hospital room where a young and healthy Penny was looking around, confused.

"Get rid of the Hulk, please." said Banner.

"Hulk is a second personality of sorts. It controls your power. I can fuse you two if you want to be strong and have control over yourself, or I can eliminate your power entirely if you prefer."

He thought for a second, then said: "Fuse us."

I snapped my fingers and went into his 'Dr. Hulk' form.

Natasha asked me to bring Burton back, so I did and even got rid of his mind-control.

"Now then, what do you want, lightning bug?" asked Merlin. She didn't like that such a weak being called himself a God.

"Bring back my brother..." he said.

"Your brother isn't a good person. He will never be, at least not fully. Do you still want him?" I asked. I want to see his response.

"I know that my brother is definitely not a good person, but I believe he is not completely evil. Maybe, just maybe, he can change."

"Done." I said and brought Loki back from the dead. "However… His freedom will be limited. You and your father will be able to know his position and thoughts at any moment. You better keep his leash short."

Thor nodded and started hugging his traumatized brother.

"Eliminate all threats to humanity." said Fury.

"Who said that I would give you anything, cyclops pirate? Also, humanity's greatest threat is humanity itself, I would have to kill everyone and recreate a new humanity that won't advance towards destruction." I said and created another portal to a new universe. "We are going now. Prepare yourselves for an alien invasion and search for something called the Infinity Stones."

When we reached the new universe, we were above a beautiful sea. And I got bombarded.

"Fuck you! Who the fuck was that?!" Who the fuck shoots people with naval guns?! Oh, yeah. Shipgirls.

I looked over in the direction the shots came from and who do I find? The fucking Americans! Only they would shoot first and ask questions later. Actually, I guess that is a little biased, but true in this case!

I teleported in front of the shipgirls and rounded them up.

"Let's see… Baltimore, Colorado, Maryland, West Virginia, North Carolina, Washington, Yorktown, Enterprise, Hornet, Essex, Shangri-La, Bunker Hill, Seattle, Georgia." I said. "What the fuck? Are you all going somewhere or did you just decide to come out to shoot me?"

"Ugh, why can't we move?! Who are you?!" shouted Enterprise.

"Oh dear, you can't move? Oh, I'm sorry, let me free you… Like hell! Why did you randomly shoot a human?"

"This part of the sea is infested by those Sirens! The questions should be why a human is here, flying!" said Yorktown.

"And you aren't hospitalized yet. I guess I arrived earlier than expected. Good. I am a God. You all will be following me from now on." I said and used a little bit of compulsion to have them obey. I immediately stored them in my Inner World. I then used Omniscience to take the information from this universe.

"Why are you going around collecting shipgirls?" asked Merlin.

"Because I am planning on modifying our base. I will need people to make it more homey. Plus, they are all sexy as fuck. Did you see those thighs? They are as good as yours or Yang's before becoming Goddesses!"

"You fucking pervert. You have six wives and four maids already!"

"But I don't have any shipgirls! And we are also getting Gungirls after this. But those I can create myself, so we will only get the knowledge. I will finally give my original weapons an upgrade."

Like so, I collected the previously mentioned Eagle Union girls, some Royal Navy girls (Dido, Belfast, Sheffield, Hood, King George V, Prince of Wales, Duke of York, Formidable, Victorious, Illustrious, Glorious, Swiftsure, Hermione, Howe, Neptune, Monarch, Cheshire, Drake), some Iris Libre girls (Champagne, Saint Louis, Jeanne d'Arc, Richelieu), some Vichya Dominion girls (Gascogne, Algérie, Jean Bart, Le Malin, Dunkerque), all of the Northern Parliament girls, Littorio, some girls from the Sakura Empire (Azuma, Ibuki, Izumo, Kitakaze, Shinano, Akagi, Amagi, Atago, Takao, Choukai, Kaga, Maya, Mikasa, Kawakaze, Noshiro, Shoukaku, Zuikaku, Tosa, Chitose, Chiyoda, Nagato), some Iron Blood girls (Mainz, Odin, Bismarck, Graf Zeppelin, Prinz Eugen, Tirpitz, Admiral Graf Spee, Admiral Hipper, Deutschland), and the Siren girls.

I will probably leave them free to roam my lake, after some proper strengthening and improvements. I will have my fleets, one way or another.

After I was done with that, I opened a portal and entered it. We appeared in a snowy field, and again we were shot at, this time with rifle bullets.

'Aah, good old Girls' Frontline…'

I checked and they were Sangvis scum. I immediately killed them all, wiping their files from existence, so that they could never be recreated. I used Omniscience to take all of the designs and concepts for the different T-Dolls. I immediately created designs for my weapons, so that I could create my own Dolls when I want to. That sounds creepy.

"Master, are there many other universes that you want to visit?"

"One last universe. I will only take the knowledge, then we will come back with the rest of the gang. This was supposed to be a quick trip, yet I already visited four universes… Oh well, I am a God, I can do whatever I want. Yeah, let's think that way."

I opened a new portal and entered. I found myself in space, above a planet somewhat similar to Earth. I didn't want to interfere too much, since this will be a nice playground for Pyrrha. I used Omniscience and obtained all the knowledge from the Legendary Mechanic universe. There was some really good stuff, while other stuff was just a cultivation rip-off with less benefits and harder pre-requisites. Like, who would ever cultivate inside a star? You cultivate in a mountain, become a God, then wreck shit. Wait, that's what I did.

Anyway, I got all the knowledge I needed, so I opened a new portal and went back to the Tensura universe. My quick trip was completed, and I was perfectly unbalanced aka absolutely broken.