Grand Excalibur

Beta: Old man of the mountain/Darklord331

_________

"Yes, you're dead. But that's alright now. Your soul shouldn't disperse anymore." I said cheerfully to try and cover the morbid topic.

That seemed to have backfired as Olga suffered a mental breakdown. She collapsed to her knees, her hands covering the sides of her face as she muttered, "Impossible… it can't be… I couldn't have just… died…"

"Director…" Mash moved to comfort the woman by placing a hand on her shoulder.

Olga flinched at Mash's touch. As though realizing something, Olga clapped her cheeks and stood up.

"Alright. I can have a breakdown later. There's still a source of this singularity to investigate."

I could tell the woman was hanging by a thread. She'll break at the slightest touch. Olga marched forward, "Now, given that we are in a replica of the Fuyuki Grail Wars in 2004, the only thing that is remotely powerful enough to establish a singularity is the Holy Grail."

"Holy Grail?" Ritsuka Fujimaru blurted it, probably unintentionally, given how he appeared to want to crawl into a hole with the glare Olga sent his way.

"Yes. The Holy Grail. The Cup of Heaven is a vessel that contains the foundation of all forms of magic. In 2004, seven mages fought among each other for the Grail and the Master of Caster won."

I sensed the presence of another servant. It was faint, obscured by magecraft. That was probably why I couldn't properly detect it before.

Olga continued as she cupped her chin in contemplation, "But it seems something has gone awry…"

Wordlessly, I conjured up a single blob of plasma and fired it right next to the obscured presence, destroying a chunk of the streets.

"Whoa now, whoa now! Beggin' your pardon, Goddess! I ain't your foe, I swear!" A blue-haired man wielding a wooden staff while wearing a coat that reminded me of a wizard said as he revealed himself, "Ah, sure, I was only tryin' to make a memorable introduction, ya see!"

He had a very heavy Irish accent.

Oh wait, it's just Cu Caster… Wait, Cu Caster is in Singularity F? I mean, yeah you do fight against him in one of the battles but— Huh. I really don't remember a lot about the Singularities.

As Olga started talking with Cas Cu, I started thinking of what I knew about the Singularities. If I remember correctly, wasn't the next Singularity Orleans? It had something about Jeanne Alter that the fandom absolutely loves for some reason. The next one is… what's the next one again?

I know that there's a London Singularity, an ocean one, a Camelot one, a Babylonia, and a final one but what about the others? What are the other three?

"Goddess Kukulkan."

I was lost in thought, but hearing Olga call out my name brought me out of the depths of my mind.

Turning to face her, I said, "Yeah? We figured out the issue?"

"Y—Yes we have. After speaking with Caster, we've determined the most likelihood of causing this anomaly to indeed be the Holy Grail that Saber is guarding. Beyond that, this isn't the Holy Grail War in that my father participated in."

"I've gotta be sayin'..." Cu said, his mouth curving upward in a smile, "Watchin' ya take down Archer and Berserker like it was nothin' was a pure delight, I must say. But I'm a bit miffed that ya didn't let Archer go. We had a score to settle, ya know?"

The smile didn't reach Cu's eyes. He wasn't pleased it seems that I got the final kill on Archer. Cas Cu glanced at the summoned Archer before turning to look at me.

"Sorry."

What else could I say?

Cu shrugged his shoulders, "Aye, what's done is done. I've taken care of Assassin, so now all that's left is to face Lancer and Saber, a very special individual who—" the Caster turned to Olga and the others, "—wields the most famous holy sword in history. Excalibur."

"Excalibur?" Mash exclaimed, making me notice the tiny fluff of white fur that peeked out of her shoulder.

"We have to fight King Arthur?"

I think the fandom called the male protagonist Gudao.

"Ah, King Arthur's a lady, mind ya. A wee little girl, if ya will."

Cu faced me fully. He had a bit of an anticipating smile.

"Now, I know ya dispatched those two servants like it was no trouble, but mark my words, King Arthur is unlike anythin' you've ever witnessed. She's taken down everyone but me, turned 'em into corrupted versions of themselves. I reckon you should let me lend a hand in fightin' her."

"..." Man, Cu really wants to fight Saber huh? "Alright. I guess I can use some help in fighting against Saber."

I don't need any help fighting against Saber.

Unless my memory of watching clips of Fate/Stay Night Excalibur scenes proves faulty, nowhere does Saber's output even come close to anything Ion did. I mean, the Fandom did say that Excalibur chased away the White Titan, so maybe a fully unsealed Excalibur could cause some harm to me.

Nothing's for certain, so it's best to be cautious.

"Should we deal with Lancer first?" I asked.

"Sure, Saber should've felt Berserker and Archer passin'. She'd likely be callin' back Lancer to serve as her new guard dog. Heh, Lancer turned into a guard dog. How ironic for fate to choose her and not me."

Cu chuckled a bit at the last part.

With our new target acquired, we started traveling towards Ryuudou Temple: the site where the Greater Grail was and the place that Saber was guarding.

I also started walking since it didn't feel right to fly when others in my group couldn't.

Embarrassingly, after the first few steps I almost fell to the ground when my foot unexpectedly caught on a depression in the road. In fact, I would've had I not instinctively activated flight to stop all my body's movement.

No one else said anything about my walking since nothing appeared out of the ordinary. The total distance of my fall could be measured by millimeters and thus, could easily be excused as a side effect of my walking.

"..."

All of us continued in silence. Cas Cu went in and out of spirit form. Olga, Ritsuka, and Mash walked while the latter hauled her massive shield around. Archer was silent this whole time, intent on observing me.

The silence was only broken for a while when Olga sent a message to Romani before returning.

I'll admit, I became a bit bored since there really wasn't much to do. Oh sure, I could look at the destroyed cityscape around me but it's become boring after looking at it for too long. Everything is the same; the ruins.

I guess being able to fly really fast has spoiled me on the journey it takes to reach that destination. More than that, I wasn't used to walking for so long.

It was a worry of mine— being more and more detached from humanity that is. While during 'When Day Breaks', such things as not eating, drinking, or sleeping had their uses, but after the disaster had passed, I found myself unable to relate to people when they talked about their favorite food or the fact that Bright couldn't wait to return to his bed and sleep off the stress that comes from working. Angela talked about her desire to play with the other childrens after a long day of studying, but I just can't relate to her no matter how hard I tried.

'Play'... what is play?

I started to see the whole 'forest', and I found myself beginning to lose touch with the trees of that 'forest'.

It was… strange at first, but now I simply accepted it. The worry has grown less and less pronounced yet nonetheless I couldn't help but wonder if I should take up eating once more, if only to be closer to those I try to save.

I tried once, but food's a waste of time. I could spend the 20 minutes eating moving halfway across the world to give other settlements supplies. Or maybe I could've built another shelter. Or move heavy construction materials. Or plenty of other things.

"Hey Goddess Kukulkan," It was Ritsuka who spoke first, "Are you… I know you introduced yourself as a 'Goddess' but are you a Servant?"

Olga glared hard at the 'commoner', screaming at him with her eyes to shut up.

"I am… something like that. I believe I would be classified as a Foreigner."

"A Foreigner?" Olga muttered as her eyes became lost in thought, "An Extra Class…"

"What's that?"

"I am not of this world. Yet at the same time, I am a product of its collective consciousness. I took the name 'Kukulkan' because that collective consciousness named me such."

Ritsuka clearly didn't get that, so instead he decided to go for another angle, "So do you have any interesting stories to tell?"

"Interesting stories?" I almost laughed at Ritsuka's question. Stories? I've got dozens of memorable stories and hundreds of less memorable ones. "Which one do you want to hear?"

"Hmm, tell me your most interesting one."

"My most interesting one?" I trailed off as hundreds of stories were eliminated right off the bat.

My most interesting story…

That reminds me, I should release Zvezdnyy soon, preferably when I reach Chaldea.

"My most interesting story is a long one."

"Well, we have time."

I looked ahead and saw the long walk to Ryuudou Temple. Yes, we do have time.

"Alright." I moved my neck from side to side and received zero satisfying cracks, "You can see me as a defense mechanism. An antibody safety net. I travel the multiverse unrestricted to new worlds that need my help. In a particular world, its sun had turned hostile and converted all, plants or animals, who bathed under its light into molten masses of meat with textures of melted wax. They had the consistency of melted wax too. Almost liquid, yet not quite."

Ritsuka and Mash grimaced at my description. I don't blame them for being disgusted.

I gave the two a sanitized version of my journey. I told them of how I saved a group of survivors and kept them underground in the New York subways before I made contact with an international security organization for the safety and prolongation of humanity. I then told them of my adventure into one of that organization's facilities that's been overrun and discovered a dangerous anomaly there capable of warping reality. The sun was trying to break in and acquire that anomaly.

Having Communication Talent made my story-telling ability almost prodigious since I caught even Cas Cu and Archer's attention.

I then told them how that anomaly was the key to fixing the sun, and so I carried that anomaly up to the sun. There, Sol told me how she loved her childrens, and how because of realizing how when people died, they were sent to a place of unchanging eternity, she sought to give them euphoria instead.

Nonetheless, I had to stop her, for while endless euphoria in my view was preferable compared to an unchanging eternity as an afterlife, the cost was too great. So I damned all of humanity to an unchanging eternity compared to a blissful euphoria.

"... And so, I plunged the anomaly in the shape of a spear into the heart of Sol. She cried out but was quickly silenced, leaving me alone with only the sound of the boiling stellar plasma around me."

We reached the base of the mountain that Ryuudou Temple was on by the time I concluded my story.

"Now, I travel to find a solution to that Afterlife. And here we are."

It was captivating enough to almost bring Mash to tears.

That was creepy. A simple story wasn't supposed to bring you to tears, songs should do that, movies should do that, and books should do that, not a simple story!

"I'm… I'm sorry Goddess Kukulkan. I was… jealous of you having such powers but… Please!" Mash bowed, "Accept my apology!"

While Mash gave me a heartfelt apology, I was over here wondering what she was talking about. Jealous? Perhaps one could be jealous of my power I guess, if they didn't know the price.

"Um. I accept. Just protect your Master well from now on, alright? We're here."

The mountain was blanketed by greenery untouched by the flames… and something else veiled from sight. I could sense magical energy from it like a human might sense heat.

Just then, metal chains manifested into reality. Those chains came from tree to tree like spider webs as individual connected links saturated the space between each wooden trunk. It was so numerous that I don't think a normal human could get through it all without touching at least one of those chains. Not even one of those super spies from a movie.

Lancer stood atop the largest concentration of these chains akin to a spider waiting for her prey. She was garbed in an outfit that reminded me of a Grim Reaper. Add to the fact that she wielded a scythe that seemed to radiate death and Lancer really does look like the Grim Reaper incarnate.

"So, you're the one who got Saber all uppity, eh?" Medusa spoke in a heavy Greek accent, "Youse don't seem like much to me, ya know?"

"Mind yourself now, Goddess. Medusa wields Harpe, the weapon Perseus used to slay immortals and cause wounds that won't heal." Cas Cu then started preparing several runes while at the same time, Archer disappeared from view, presumably to set up a sniping position far away, "Now—"

I raised a hand and a stream of coherent plasma that looked like a beam came forth and sliced through the air with incredible speed. Medusa had no time to react other than to bring her Harpe up to try and at least somewhat dull the damage.

It was unsuccessful. The pencil-wide beam of plasma cut right through Harpe and burned a hole in Medusa's chest, causing Lancer to evaporate away in particles of purple light.

I made sure to control my output since I didn't want the people around me to be harmed.

"Ah, Goddess, ya know? You're a proper killjoy, aren't ya now? Ye couldn't have given me a chance to have a go at a fight, could ya?"

Cu tsked as his lips thinned until I couldn't see the redness anymore. There was an apologetic look on my face. Antagonizing my allies probably isn't the wisest choice.

"Sorry. You'll get to fight Saber, I promise."

"Ye betcha!"

We continued traveling with Archer appearing ahead of us at the entrance to a cave. It was a natural cave entrance that man had modified.

Archer really is a man of few words as I don't think I've ever heard him speak.

"Here. The Grail is inside." And then Archer spoke.

"Alright, so what's our battle plan against King Arthur?" Ritsuka asked.

If this was me alone, I would've just gone in loud and guns blazing. In short, I see myself rising in the air until the city of Fuyuki is nothing more than a single indistinguishable bright spot amongst many in Japan at night. There, I would speed down and crash into Ryuudou Temple like a meteorite with the force of a small nuclear warhead, destroying it entirely.

Or if there are threats of innocents getting caught in the blast, I'll just melt the whole mountain with plasma.

"Alright, here's what's in me noggin'. Shielder girl!" Cu called out, causing Mash to stand up straight, "Yer responsible for keepin' those squishy humans safe. Archer, you'll be hangin' back, takin' shots. I'll be up front, unleashin' me Noble Phantasm. Goddess?"

"Yes?"

"Wait to attack until after I've unleashed me Noble Phantasm, yeah?"

I nodded.

So we entered into the narrow tunnel. Very soon, the exit of the tunnel led to a large chamber that contained the source of this Singularity.

The chamber was massive. Easily hundreds of meters across with a large volcano-like structure in the middle that emitted a purple glow while being choked full of magical energy.

That must be the Greater Grail.

And in front of the Greater Grail stood the blackened form of Artoria Pendragon with her dark armor broken by lines of crimson, her eyes closed as her ashen blonde hair swayed slightly from the air currents seeping in through the tunnel.

She was radiating magical energy. The air around her immediate vicinity was so saturated with the stuff that I think it's easily comparable to the air inside the Age of Gods.

Saber opened her mouth to utter a word—

Archer fired an arrow that had a vapor cone forming around it.

The projectile closed the hundred-meter gap between him and Saber in milliseconds. Artoria had no problem bringing her sword up and deflecting the sword arrow up and over her head into the purple volcano-like structure behind her.

"Worthless cur!" Artoria's face twisted in anger and spoke in a British accent, "A sneak attack? Absolutely despicable! I'm well aware of how you swiftly dealt with Archer and Berserker, so I shall—"

"My magecraft is a Cage of Flames. A flaming yet verdant giant. Retribution—"

Saber must've realized what Cu was doing as an aura suddenly appeared around the knight. That aura grew in intensity like the music before a crescendo. "<Excalibur—"< p>

"—A shrine that purifies the evil of human affairs. The one who destroys. <Wicker Man>!"

"—Morgan>!"

A giant humanoid made out of wood and surrounded by fire rose up on one side of the chamber while on the other a gargantuan discharge of raw magical energy flowed out from Saber in the shape of a veritable current of black flame.

The flame burned down the wooden humanoid with ease. It burned away the normal-looking fire underneath the wood giant.

Just as the torrent of black fire neared the group, I stepped in front of Mash, Olga, and Ritsuka. There, I flared up my shield and took the full brunt of Excalibur's blast.

"…"

The flames stopped right at the edge of my greenish shield comprising of magical energy. It tried to scorch the shield and break it down to no avail, and so like water it went the path of least resistance, and thus, a single torrent of black flame lost its coherency and went off to the sides.

It was… disappointing.

Oh sure, it was much more powerful than anything I've ever encountered since entering this world, but it was nothing compared to what I experienced before.

As Excalibur Morgan's flames stopped, I could see how Artoria was absolutely shocked at how I was untouched by her Noble Phantasm. She couldn't believe the sheer breadth of power between the two of us.

"Impossible!"

I wasted no time and took off.

Closing the distance between the two of us in the span of milliseconds, I threw a punch with my right hand. No doubt thanks to her Instincts honed from her long years fighting on the battlefield, Artoria brought her sword up just barely in time by the slimmest of margins to halt my punch.

The air went wild as the blade of Excalibur sang and rattled. Even though my fist was punching the sharp edge of Excalibur, the blade wasn't cutting my flesh.

Her feet dug into the earth as she tried to withstand just one punch.

I pushed forward with that punch, not even bothering to use my other hand. Excalibur slowly inched closer and closer to Artoria's face as she desperately tried to stop the sword.

But my force was just too much. Excalibur was a double-edged sword, with one side pointing at me and the other pointing right at Saber, very soon it'll cut right into her face.

Realizing she could not meet my strength, Saber suddenly shifted to the side in the span of less than a second and allowed the force to hit nothing but air as she gave up on that defense.

Fortunately, I could fly, so I couldn't be knocked off balance as Saber expected me to.

There, I swiped my other hand and sent Artoria careening right into the sides of the cavern chamber. A huge explosion of dust formed as the whole place shook.

"Hey! Be careful not to collapse the cavern! Not all of us are as durable as you!" Olga yelled, causing a sheepish expression to appear on my face.

"Ugh…" A sound of groaning came from the cloud of dust and debris. Artoria used her sword as a crutch and limped out, bleeding from several spots, "I… impressive… the Grand Order… is in… good hands…"

"Grand Order?" Olga asked with no answer since Saber had begun to evaporate away into a cloud of particles.

"Wait, Saber, what's that mean? You know somethin' we all don't, do ya?"

Artoria didn't answer Cu's question. At the same time, Cas Cu also began to evaporate after the Holy Grail War ended.

Looking down at his already disappeared hands, he said, "Ah, damn. Seems I didn't do much, did I?"

All that remained in this chamber after Cu's disappearance was me, Olga, Ritsuka, Mash, and Archer, who appeared next to his master. I strode towards the grail piece that fell from Saber's evaporated-away corpse, intent on collecting it.

Just then, a voice riddled with derision and contempt called out, "Wow! I did not expect a thing like you to intervene on behalf of humanity, Goddess! How disgusting!"

_______

AN: I'm having a lot of fun with the accents.