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FOREARM WARRIOR

A fantasy parody heavily inspired by Dungeon and Dragons. Does this novel take itself seriously? Fuck no. Is it good? Probably not. A young hero with massive forearms goes on an adventure, after being kicked out of the house at 2 and a half years old.

GodOfGrammor · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
12 Chs

The Birth of the Forearm Warrior Ch 3

1 Year Has Passed.

MLML is laying on his bed staring at his thatch roof. He is deep in his feels when his father knocks on his door.

"MLML, get your lazy bitch ass out of bed and get working on your forearm exercises."

Igneal doesn't seem to understand MLML's feelings. Now 2 and a half years old he is trying to cope with the untimely death of his only friend. He doesn't even do his beloved forearm exercises on some days. He just lazes around the house like a 30-year-old unemployed bum.

Igneal slams the door after seemingly not getting through to his son. His footsteps can be heard thumping across the wooden floors.

MLML thinks about his friend's last words, was there something more to this seemingly random attack on Greenflower?

He thinks about the day of the event, right after the passing of his friend MLML could not control his anger. He may be young and under 2 feet tall but his forearms aided him in his martial prowess. He turned to the remaining 14 dragons then placed his hands on the ground and threw himself in the air with a forearm jump. Leaping over 10 feet in the air he landed aback a dragon. He raised his arms in the air and clapped his forearms against the dragon's ears. The ensuing smack splattered flesh, brain matter, and blood in every direction in a sphere of 10 feet.

MLML in the eyes of the farmers looked straight out of their worst nightmare. Covered in blood and flesh he began to glide to the ground as the dragon's motor function had failed.

The farmers did not recognize the local boy because of his unsightly appearance and were not sure whether to prioritize the stick dragons or MLML.

Before the farmers could come together and attack one opponent or the other. MLML leaped to the next dragon. He brought his forearms together above his head then slammed them down on a dragon's spine. The dragon folded as several of its vertebrae were obliterated by brute force. It crumpled like lizard origami as it was vanquished from existence. Within another 30 seconds, the second great dinosaur extinction occurred. What remained were dragons littered across the battlefield with horrific fractures with no remaining life force.

A single man, who witnessed this miracle looked at the small man who just single-handedly did what an entire squadron of nights would struggle to accomplish.

In response to this, he screamed, "The gods have sent us the forearm warrior!".

Everybody else in the area cheered for the anonymous blood-soaked hero who stood at a mighty 2 feet tall.