Loyalscum
This story is exceptionally well-written. Each scene is properly established, characters are unique and well-developed and descriptions are vivid. Reading this was like reading a published novel. I also love the steampunk-like fictional world the author has created, complete with its own unique history and backstory. This is a wholly original piece of fiction from the mind of an author with a great imagination and stellar technical writing abilities. The protagonist has been well-established in the opening few chapters and I am intrigued by the mystery regarding the ship of corpses that crashed in the opening chapter - apparently all slaughtered by an enemy species that has been causing this society grief for some time, but I wonder if something more sinister is at play. Love the author's writing style. His descriptions are vivid and original and his dialogue is always colorful and reads like actual speech as opposed to the more stilted and robotic variety that plagues many works of fiction. And easy five stars for a high quality read. I have added to my library and will keenly follow future installments.
[img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=coins][img=fp][img=fp][img=fp][img=fp][img=update][img=update][img=coins][img=fp][img=fp][img=fp][img=fp][img=fp][img=update]
Narration is cut above the rest and it is superb. The only problem I see was to cut the paragraphs into smaller ones. Making it lighter to read for the eyes to see. Also, the grammar has depth in it so it is okay for me. Passable and outstanding! The story has great potential and has quality. Kudos! Good luck in the future!
A very good story overall. Very well written. Characters seem interesting enough. The description is phenomenal. The one thing I would say, is that I think this story needs a bit more tension. Perhaps that's just my thoughts. Someone else may feel this story is just their pace. But I felt, the story could use a bit more of some umph in it to make it feel more intense. I look forward to seeing what you do next.
Honestly one of the most well detailed stories on his site/app. I can't describe the level of creativity and work that that went into this novel. It is just pure goodness. Seriously go check it out. One last note for the author. I would highly recommend dulling down the sizes of some of your paragraphs. They seem a bit large which might put off some readers since they aren't used to reading big blocks of text. Other than that, absolutely wonderful. Keep up the hard work!