The cry of a broken heart never ends...

James POV:

"I never said I was good, you only assumed I was. I never said I was understanding, you only assumed I was. I never said I loved you, you only assumed I did. If I had loved you from the beginning it wouldn't take me months to finally call you Babe"..... Those words kept resounding in my ear as I bit my nails, tears threatening to fall off my eyes,

" Did Katie really meant those words she said to me or was she just pulling my legs? I'm trying my fucking best to make her feel comfortable and she's blurting trash to my hearing ".... I kept soliloquizing with my heart torn from my chest, I thought she loved me just as much as I did but I guess I was wrong.

***Few hours ago****

Katie laid on the bed with her earpiece plugged in while she sang along to her favorite song by Smith - Too Good at Goodbyes- with her eyes closed, her back laying flat on the bed, she sang with so much pain and tears triggered down her eyes, her heart heavy with hurts, she hated herself, she hated the fact she was in a relationship with someone who barely knows her, someone who doesn't understand how she feels, someone who's so greedy and self-centered, someone who wants to be the only one that matters, James thought he was making her feel comfortable rather she felt choked and pitied, you can't pity someone and call it love, all you do is out of pity but you claim it's out of love... She was hurting a lot but James couldn't see this....

" What are you doing?"...James asked as he walked to Katie while she was still singing with her eyes closed, Katie didn't notice his presence she kept singing and sobbing. James unplugged her earpiece and stared at her.

"What are you doing?"... James asked again with anger in his voice.

Katie sniffed as she wiped the tears off her face, sat upright on the bed...

" Nothing"... She replied.

"It's a Saturday, aren't you supposed to do the laundry instead of being overly dramatic?"... James asked sharply

Stunned by his words, Katie looked at him surprised, she smirked and replied.

" I never knew I became a laundromat, what happened to the guy who always did your laundry?"... Katie asked and she crossed her arms over her chest, James stared at her for a while...

"He traveled, he won't be back until next week"... He replied

" Can you please help me out?"... He asked

"No I can't"... Katie replied as she laid back on the bed with an attempt to go back to her previous position. James pulled her close as he stared death in her eyes, his breathe hitting her skin making it red, his grip on her tightened...

" You're hurting me"... She said as she struggled to free his grip, James heaved a sigh and let loose his hold on her.

"You know I love you Katie, I hate it when you lock yourself in the room, singing and crying for no specific reason, you're the reason I'm struggling so much, I don't want to see you hurting anymore, I missed seeing you smile a lot and the thoughts of you hurting over your past makes me feel I'm not trying my best"... James said as he sat close to her on the bed.

" Love? Did you just say you love me?"... Katie asked and scuffed.

"You call pitying love? Ever since you knew about my condition of always reminiscing about my past, you became too bulky to understand, sometimes I need an alone time, sometimes I need to just play the music on my playlist and feel good but no, when I'm alone you suddenly jump out of nowhere and force me to play games with you, when I want to play songs you prefer to play vibrant songs and tell me to dance, that lifestyle doesn't suit me, why can't you just pretend you know nothing about my condition and let me live the way I've been living?".... Katie asked with tears flowing down her cheek, James left speechless calmly replied...

" I know you love me that's why you do all these things even when you don't want to, I know you understand me that's why you never complain about a thing, I know you're good with me knowing about your condition and you told me about it anyways, you trusted me that's why you told me"... James said as he held her hands in his, Katie pulled her hands off his and shifted from her postion...

"I never said I was good, you only assumed I was. I never said I was understanding, you only assumed I was. I never said I loved you, you only assumed I did. If I had loved you from the beginning it wouldn't take me months to finally call you Babe".... Katie said as she stood from the bed and walked out of the room with a bang behind her, leaving James more confused about what was going on again, he followed her but couldn't find her outside, she was gone, she went into hiding again, she always does that when she doesn't want to talk to him. He's still yet to find her hideout, he called and called with no answer.

He walked to the garden, sat on the ground biting his nails lost in thoughts.

He never done anything to hurt her, he only cared for her, everything he did was to make her happy, every action he took was to make sure she doesn't have time to over think things, he made time out of his busy schedules just to make sure he gave her much attention, he really did his best, how did it all come to this?

Katie sat on the ground under the oak tree in the garden, the cool breeze blowing her hair back and forth, her eyes closed, knees to her chest, her head buried in her knees as tears keeps flowing from her eyes. She doesn't know how to control all the emotions going in her head, she's lost control of herself, she sees the world in a different angle, her perspective of what love is was different from the world's.

She believed love was not just a feeling of emotional attachment but freedom, happiness, care, emotional support, shoulder to cry on, somebody to trust, somebody who believes in you, somebody who wouldn't judge you when others are judging you, someone who will love you genuinely without pitying you. James did loved her but it was just too much of his attention and care that was breaking her up, she wants to be treated the exact same way he's been treating her.

"It seemed like joke in the first place, only for me to realize it isn't.

What a fucked up world we live in.

My heart cries for freedom, the beats of my heart sounds like the drum beat of war.

What am I doing?

What am I going to do?

How am I going to do it?

Where will I start from?

Whom should I run to?

Who should I cry to?

These are the questions I always ask myself...

Well there seems to be no answers.

Maybe my answer lies in silence, maybe it lies in the dark, maybe it lies within me.

Maybe I won't get an answer, maybe I probably have an answer but can't figure it out, maybe I am the answer, maybe I'm not

What the fuck is going on?

Maybe just maybe I'm to live this way, maybe I'm to find my peace and happiness before the light will come.

Maybe I should just be me and me alone. The cry of a broken heart, never ends"... Katie said as she stood from her position and walked back to the house.

James saw her coming out from the back of the oak tree, he quickly rushed to her and hugged her...

" I'm sorry for everything, for caring too much, for loving too much, for not giving you the space that you needed, for not allowing you do whatever you wanted to do... I'm going to make it up to you Katie just tell me what you said earlier was false, tell me you actually loved me, tell me you actually understand me, tell me you actually cared, tell me you were good with me knowing about everything, just tell me and everything will go back to the way it was".... James said still hugging her, Katie gently pulled out of his arms, looked him in the eyes with a smile, James on the other hand felt relieved seeing her smile, he knew everything was going to be be fine...

"I'm sorry James, it's all me, I'm the problem, I just want to be alone... I've hurt out enough and can't continue hurting you, you're too good for me and I want the best for you, you should find someone else to bear your burdens with you, I'm not good enough"... Katie said as she walked past James.

James felt so heavy hearted he thought they were good but she wants to end it all?

" Wait Katie, you want a break?"...he scoffed as he held her hand.

"Do you think anyone will love you the way you are? Do you think anyone will accept you being delusional? Hahaha you must be joking".... He said sarcastically as he laughed uncontrollably, which made Katie wonder if this was actually James.

" I should be the one ending the relationship, who do you think you are? Wait do you really think I loved you? Hahaha Daniel told me you were really good in bed and I thought to try it out and well I'll give it to you, you're really good, oooooh damn good and you think you could walk away from the relationship like it's nothing... Well let's say I never knew I'd like you so much but I do now and you want to walk away like that? No Katie you can't do that".... James said not caring about how she might have felt.

Katie though broken she hid her emotions from him, acting all strong.

"Are you done talking?".... She asked calmly.

" What do you mean?".. James asked surprised.

"Goodbye James".. She said and walked away....