ZetzuSensei
I don't mean to sound rude but I have a couple problems with this novel so far. 1)I don't see how after 5 years a man that was 80+ will start calling someone father. 2) You have yoriichis personality wrong, yoriichi does not stutter or shout. You're making him like a little kid, but even as a kid he was extremely quiet. 3) He mostly has an emotionless face or a small smile at times. He rarely shows his emotions. 4) Yoriichi dislikes fighting he would not proudly declare that his father is the strongest. These are the problems I see hope I didn't come off rude.