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Review Detail of Spelloyal in Reborn: My Two Systems at War

Review detail

Spelloyal
SpelloyalLv119mthSpelloyal

This is a review of the story until chapter 22. I'm really enjoying reading it, it's an interesting novel and it's totally worth reading, however it's not a masterpiece so don't read it hoping to find the next LOM or library of heaven's path, just a good and interesting novel. The reason I don't give it 5 stars is that Chapter 1 was very confusing and often the protagonist is in one scenario and suddenly jumps to another. This doesn't make the story confusing, but without even a transition paragraph between the scenarios, the immersion is broken and this harms the reading experience. If you want an example of what I'm talking about, read the end of chapter 21 and the beginning of 22. We don't even have the protagonist getting up and saying "I'm going" before changing scenes. All we have is someone saying "something is happening that might interest you", the chapter ends and in the next the protagonist is already on the street crossing the crowd. Another small problem is that in the beginning, during the escape the protagonist seems to be portrayed as a child by the other characters but shortly after she is being narrated as an slender woman, not even an slender young woman but an slender woman right after another bad transition, which makes everything worse. These are the only problems that I noticed and they are details, but they bothered me a lot and that's why I'm not giving it 5 stars.

Reborn: My Two Systems at War

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AnonymUser
AnonymUserAuthorAnonymUser

Nice, thanks. This review contains useful information for story improvement. Still, I will argue about the part about first chapter. It is supposed to be confusing, because it is confusing situation of MC remembering her past life, dying and awakening two systems.