Review Detail of 7SLOTH in Erotic RPG: I am in the Game world, But My Heroines are Villainesses
Review detail
biggest problem to start off is the writing. it is so bad and needs major work. I was about to drop many times. So if you don't like to have to correct the writing in your head, don't read. Mc doesn't feel human at times. The author loves portraying the Mc as someone who can control their emotions. Which doesn't really come out well. Since the Mc just feels dead at times. A plus is that if you like transgression game stories. I think you will like this one. Since i love in game transgressions a bit too much. So i am a bit biased. At least for me, it is a plus. Another negative is mc and romance. It doesn't have much build up. plus, the girls seem to like him first always. Which then just has him saying yes. I really don't like how easy it is for him personally. Regardless, I liked the story even with its inconsistencies. Just the writing and grammar need to be fixed big time. Review is from finishing chapter 199.
Erotic RPG: I am in the Game world, But My Heroines are Villainesses
Darkness_Enjoyer
Liked it!
LIKEReplies2
oh alright author that is good to know. Just if you do try making it big. Which I believe your story can. I think your writing/grammar is the biggest flaw. Once that is fixed, I think you can be up there.
Darkness_Enjoyer:To be honest, I don't prioritize writing novels as a profession. It's just a hobby for me, so I don't spend much time on each chapter or bother with proofreading. However, I do make sure to maintain proper grammar, at least to the point where things are at least readable, though English is not my mother tongue, so there are a lot of mistakes. Regarding the main character, I don't believe I depicted them as overly mechanical or lacking in humanity. However, if that is your perspective, I am unable to alter your perception. ----------------Spolier-------------------- When it comes to female protagonists, I believe their attraction to him wasn't too hasty. The only heroine currently in a confirmed relationship with him took at least two months of traveling, conversing, and facing challenges together before developing feelings for him. I consider this ample time for one to develop an affection for another. Thus, I disagree with you on this part. ------------------------------------------- It is important to note that Callius has no intention of pursuing another heroine. He is content with being on his own and would only consider a relationship if someone were to express interest in him. Pursuing someone would go against his established character and values, which I think I had shown thoroughly. Anyway, I appreciate the review and will try to look at the story from your perspective as well.image
To be honest, I don't prioritize writing novels as a profession. It's just a hobby for me, so I don't spend much time on each chapter or bother with proofreading. However, I do make sure to maintain proper grammar, at least to the point where things are at least readable, though English is not my mother tongue, so there are a lot of mistakes. Regarding the main character, I don't believe I depicted them as overly mechanical or lacking in humanity. However, if that is your perspective, I am unable to alter your perception. ----------------Spolier-------------------- When it comes to female protagonists, I believe their attraction to him wasn't too hasty. The only heroine currently in a confirmed relationship with him took at least two months of traveling, conversing, and facing challenges together before developing feelings for him. I consider this ample time for one to develop an affection for another. Thus, I disagree with you on this part. ------------------------------------------- It is important to note that Callius has no intention of pursuing another heroine. He is content with being on his own and would only consider a relationship if someone were to express interest in him. Pursuing someone would go against his established character and values, which I think I had shown thoroughly. Anyway, I appreciate the review and will try to look at the story from your perspective as well.