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Review Detail of The_WindChaser in Masako's Life In An Abandoned World

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The_WindChaser
The_WindChaserLv11yrThe_WindChaser

Writing Quality is good. The author gives out details nicely, but by doing it a tad too much, it got a little boring. Maybe add a breather after describing one scene, like how the character felt. For example, in my opinion, how would you feel when you see yourself being hit by a truck? Now how would your character feel it even though he/she was in third POV. Lastly, edit, edit ,edit. You have a good grasp of grammar, you need to watch out for doubled, misplaced words, commas and stuff though. Overall, good job! The story development is nice, albeit as I said, a tad too fast because of the information overload that I was getting. The sequence of the story is well-done though. You really just need to remove, or revise some words here and there. Character Design is decent. I felt that you could put more emotions into them, if that makes sense. The World Background is good! I perceived it as somewhat of an apocalyptic world where experiments on humans (hybrids?) were done and the mc got back from his dream of the past. Overall, good job! I know it's difficult to write but you can do it! Good luck!

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Masako's Life In An Abandoned World

Masaiya_Ako

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Masaiya_Ako
Masaiya_AkoAuthorMasaiya_Ako

Thanks for your insight! I'll update the chapters soon based from your advice and try to make my story more engaging.