Atimo
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Why would a teenager live alone in a different city/state far away from his family? A very strange story setting! And the setup is lacking
Doesn’t reflect years of experience as military personnel!
I thought that was the ring function?!
First, good work and keep going. The start seems promising and well written I guess. Second, since it is unclear how you will steer your story, I can only say I think Luna so far more troublesome than being useful asset to the MC for being impassive and childish. Generally I avoid "Harem" and "Comedy" because it is clichéd! Good luck! (^.^ `)