thank you for the review and the advice i will make sure to go back and work on it.

I want to preface this by saying I am a male and normaly do not read romaces nor have much inset to how they normally are written so this mostly opion I did not mind the story, It was intresting enough to hold my intrest and there were parts that with some more detail could bring more insight to charters and the commpond was intresting and would be good to know more about as well as the extant to her abiltys and how the vampires race is dying, are vampires a normal thing that is accpeted in this world or is there something else. But with that aside I will make sure to contue reading to see what happens next

the chapter was good and may be these are explained later but I suggest that in the part that talks about Chirs and his wife and the trouble they had and why she does not want to be around him, You could expanded on that here and give a bit of insight to why he is acting this way. Also the part about her friends talking to her about how his behivar is chaning is good but should maybe also be expaned on like maybe they metchin that he is 30 and has a interest in a underaged girl with would make him a P { I do not fell comfedal writting the word. A person who enjoys being with unaged girls}

your welcome

This is a intersting story from what has been written so far. I am intrested in what will happen next. What I say is my opion and suguestion to help your book become better so please don't take it the wrong way Firstly for me, It was not scary. When I read Horror/Thiller books with are nomarly Steven King. I want to be right there with the MC expericing the horror and the diolage that is written now if given more details to the world and the backround to make me feel like i am there can work. The chapters that you repeated the same dilolage twice is a clever use of diloage and can be used if it is altered in such a way that it is from the other persons perpesive. In genreal this is a good book and has the potional to be a great horror book " If you want to be a writer, you must do two things above all others: read a lot and write a lot" Stephen King

Of the chapters that I read the story is interesting backround and world building. the pace of the story is going at a good pace as for the Charcter Desions I think that if there was more despine to what they looked like and a more indepth look into there personaly would be intresting I will make sure the contue to read this to see what happens next

might want to word that a bit diffrently because of Copyright

Of the chapters that i have read so far I love this book, It has a unique blend of Lovecraftien creatures and fantasy in it, the writting is very good and is descipive enough to were you are fully imarised in the story and the pace of the book goes at a very good pace. the desion of the charters is very descipitve and I have enjoyed the book so far and will contue to read it to see what happens next

thank you for clearing up the issues with my comments you have a deep understand of the Avater the last Airbender show

Of the chapters that i have read the book is interesting and has unique character desions and the world is descired very well. the book is written very well and goes at a good pace I will be sure to contue reading this book to see what happans next

Of the chapters that I read the story was very intresting and well written, the develpont of the story is going at a good pace and the world is descired in a unqiue way. the charters are well descriebed and I will make sure to contue reading to see what happens next

What about Saka when they attacked the fire nation on the day of black sun

this line does not make sense in universe because does not Azula work with her two friends to capture Annag and the others, Jet and his allies also work in a team as well. as for the betrayal that can depend more on trust and other factors then just being in a team

This is a very good opening chapter, the charters are good and written well. I am not sure but did not Zuko get his scar by this point in his life?

Just a little suggustin, maybe to avoid copyright infrighment you do not copy Avater Last Airbender's intro word for word

Thank you Ak02-san for the advice and I have been using Grammarly on current and previse chapters if you would like to contue reading my book

From what I read this story is very intresting and the plot is progressing at a good pace. The world building is very good and unique.There moments were you can see the world that is being descird and what these pepole are doing. I will make sure to contue to see what happens next

This is brandon gould I am sorry that it took me so long to get to review this book of the chapters that I read I enjoyed the book the story is going at a good pace and the world is desioned in a interesting and unqiue way. The story is written well I will make sure to contue to read to see where the story goes from here

This story is very interesting and also has a lot of detail in the world and the first chapter makes you intersted on where the story is going to go and the desion of the chartors and the overall indeep detail given to explain the MC motive is very good I will be sure to conture to read to see where this story goes from here

This is brandon gould I am sorry that it took me a while to respond to this review swap but here is my review Of the chapters that I have read I think that this is a interesting book with a unique concept. The world is detailed enough to where I can get a genreal sense of what it looks like. besides a few minor puncion errors the story is still writtin well enough to where you can understand what is going on and the story is well paced I will be sure to read more to see what happens next