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Pocketp10mthCommentedCh 10 CHAPTER 10- Pocketp10mthCommentedCh 9 CHAPTER 9
- Pocketp1yrReplied to DwaaljamCh 4 Approach
- Pocketp1yrReplied to UthredofBebbanburg
understandable, but he was not made to understand the na'vi culture, he was made to be the perfect being in survival on earth and in pandora. I know that Dr. Grace taught him the Na'vi culture to the point of mastering it, at least theoretically, but for him it is nothing more than information about a culture.
He demanded from me the reasons why he came to his tribe, pointing his bow at me. I honestly answered him that he came to learn how to be an omaticaya and because he was bored. - Pocketp1yrReplied to UthredofBebbanburg
Understandable, but despite the fact that it would have been a real problem if an artery or a vein was severely damaged or any other part necessary for the body in a survival environment, that is precisely what this series of tests of himself was used to be able to see his abilities or limits that his body really had and if for some reason it was damaged it would regenerate (call it the plot buff). The scientists taught him some survival and more dr.grace on the planet of pandora and from what he has seen nothing is truly a problem for his integrity, but in reality he did not know anything about his abilities other than that he was stronger, faster , smarter, more resistant but he didn't know until he limited and that intrigued him.
On my fourth day I observed more capacities of my bones that were basically perfect to keep me in this atmosphere with a durability superior to that of any living being on this planet or that's what I think, for the moment I haven't broken any of them, despite that I try by throwing myself from great heights. - Pocketp1yrReplied to UthredofBebbanburg
Understandable, the character is stupid for you, any suggestions to improve it, just clarify I'm new to writing and I don't have the slightest idea how to write a story, that's why I'm doing it. What I can see you dislike is why he killed something in front of a Na'vi, it's understandable that you think that because the Na'vi have a highly spiritualistic culture regarding nature and their distaste for unnecessary hunting by at least in the culture of the ometecaya. But what I tried at least was to demonstrate his abilities and that if he attacked him he would at least defend himself, apart from Dr. Grace he knows his culture but he doesn't care because before him they are nothing more than strangers with a spiritual culture.
Which at the first moment I felt his jump to attack me, I took out the bow and arrow and so fast he jumped so fast an arrow entered his head and he fell dead. You may feel the surprise from the na'vi but ignore it, continue walking through the forest in the direction of the tribe as if nothing had happened. - Pocketp1yrReplied to UthredofBebbanburg
understandable, the character is stupid, any suggestions to improve it, just clarify I'm new to this writing and well I have no idea how to write a story that's why I'm doing it. What I can see that you don't like is the reason why they tried to break the bones in a survival situation, but the idea that I tried to capture was that I was trying to understand his body to see how resistant it was and anyway one of his many abilities are super regeneration and he knew it (I think that ability did not explain it much)
On my fourth day I observed more capacities of my bones that were basically perfect to keep me in this atmosphere with a durability superior to that of any living being on this planet or that's what I think, for the moment I haven't broken any of them, despite that I try by throwing myself from great heights. - Pocketp1yrPosted
Es una historia con una calidad de escritura muy incoherente y mucho más porque usa el Google traductor, casi no actualiza, su desarrollo de la historia deja mucho a que desear, su personaje principal lo hizo muy dominado rápidamente por lo que casi no hay desarrollo de personaje y en cuanto al contexto general por lo menos sabe algo del lore de avatar
- Pocketp1yrCommentedBasically it was a being designed for the perfect hunt, best of all it consumed almost no energy, it was like being normal alone with the intense need for a lot of wild instincts.
- Pocketp1yrCommented
This is basically what I think of the trumpet and flute
Therefore I began with the creation of air instruments such as flutes and a trumpet this time thinking about the properties offered by these types of wood and the most appropriate way I mastered both to surprising degrees in four days, curious fact a certain type of sound attracts some animals around me. - Pocketp1yrCommented
This is basically what I think of guitar
Therefore, I started voice classes for the basics, which was basically cheating with my body, being able to imitate all the sounds I wanted. Then I proceeded to improvise some string instruments based on wood and thin vines that I found around, stretching them enough to reach the tone that in my opinion was the most appropriate until I could create what in general culture was called a guitar, I got bored three days after mastering it. - Pocketp1yrCommented
The design of the house
After 15 long hours I was able to fully capture what I was looking for in a refuge, where the windows were basically a mixture of fabrics that according to dr. Grace are highly manipulable, transparent and once dry with the firmness of glass. For the glue different mosses with plants for a mixture with a strong adhesion, and the rest is the result of wood and a currently very worn knife. - Pocketp1yrCommented
aqui decia cria y depues lo que muchos llamaria bebe
The scientists in charge of my project realized that my brain would not be capable of everything so they created a section in my brain where they inserted an AI whose function is to provide me with information of my state and the different stimuli that may be happening around me along with a monotone voice, some scientists said it was just a parallel thought. All this while I was just a baby, what many would call a baby. - Pocketp1yrCommented
This would be his na'vi version among his many abilities from different species he obtained the one to change form between the human and the na'vi the one on the cover would be the human this is the version mature, use your imagination for a smaller one and childish
Ch 1 The beginning - Pocketp1yrPosted
Pues yo lo leo con google traductor asi que no sabria decir que tan bueno es la calidada de la escritura pero a lo que va la historia es buena con un comienzo bueno no le queria dar una oportunidad por que pense que hiba a ser un ff generico de teenwolf pero no tambien contiene series que conozco y que se me hacen entretenidas pór el momento para mi es una buena historia
- Pocketp1yrPosted
10/10 con una calidad de escritura y trama excelente y un desarrollo de personaje aún más. Lo único que si me sorprendió fue el cambio de trama a fantasiosa con ángeles demonios y demás a una más normal (aunque sigue habiendo temas fantasiosos) pero fuera de eso esta interesante ya que es como si fuera una novela cualquiera pero con personajes que todos conocemos y de otros animes o mangas
- Pocketp1yrCommented
if i remember correctly kayden said 3 of the 10 best in the world
Kayden: "I am quite injured guard after destroying that organization with some people from the top 100. This was my first fight against the top 100. I know from now on that you should not lower the fight at any time, you never know what the opponent's plan is."