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Daoist558845

Daoist558845

Lv3
2020-01-04 JoinedGlobal
26.3h

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  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588452h
    Commented

    Very empty, give too much power to a protagonist and you generate hatred, plus the fact that he does not need a power up for now with everything he has, if he trains him he could defeat thragg and the novel would end shortly after, I know the author said it is nfws with a plot but it develops it too well for me to drop it because we asked for more nfws

    Ch 11 11: Existentialism
    altalt
    Almost Invincible (Invincible SI)
    Anime & Comics · EmmaCruzader
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588451d
    Commented

    Pretty good but I think it was too short and you could have given Debbie more prominence in this chapter as a point of view when her husband confesses everything or some cameo hero as black samson

    Ch 12 12: The Truth of Viltrum
    altalt
    Almost Invincible (Invincible SI)
    Anime & Comics · EmmaCruzader
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588451d
    Replied to daniel_rahn

    Personally, I think it's better to give it to Amber or get it herself because the suit gave an ordinary human the strength equal to Mark's, imagine giving that to a vultrumite with speed strength, too rotobromoe the plot, although it would be great if he could mess with that story, I seriously don't like the protagonist, he reminds me of Peter from the guardians of the galaxy, hateful, crybaby and very immature (even cross it out, Starlord was better than him, for God's sake)

    Ch 11 11: Existentialism
    altalt
    Almost Invincible (Invincible SI)
    Anime & Comics · EmmaCruzader
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588459d
    Commented

    You could use the villains that I know are shown in the comics, not all of them are great villains but there is mention of some that you can use from time to time to fill in, there are also the spin off comics of invincible that can help further expand the universe of this same , or use drama, the rex and eve thing can be used to complete a mini arc and make it a good arc

    Ch 11 11: Existentialism
    altalt
    Almost Invincible (Invincible SI)
    Anime & Comics · EmmaCruzader
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588459d
    Replied to daniel_rahn

    I agree with this guy aside, the protagonist becomes an idiot with his girlfriend because he cheats on her with a woman when he cheats on her once every adventure

    Ch 11 11: Existentialism
    altalt
    Almost Invincible (Invincible SI)
    Anime & Comics · EmmaCruzader
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588451mth
    Commented

    It is obvious that Orochinaru took the most dangerous jutsus while with a genjutsu he deceived the village, it could also be Danzo trying to destroy forbidden power or take it away or Itachi trying to create a more peaceful Konoha

    Ch 76 Chapter no.76 Mystery of the Forbidden Scroll of Seals
    altalt
    Naruto : The System Files
    Anime & Comics · Adamo_Amet
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588451mth
    Commented

    Thanks for listening to my comment, I suggest you start with the comics of the current saga since the Archie ones follow the television series and the games.

    Ch 475 Chapter no.463 Zubatman?!
    altalt
    Pokémon : An Unexpected Journey
    Anime & Comics · Adamo_Amet
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588451mth
    Commented

    Author, do you know Sonic? Have you not thought about making a story that follows the plot of the comics? I feel like if it were you it would be interesting to see what you would do with it.

    Ch 475 Chapter no.463 Zubatman?!
    altalt
    Pokémon : An Unexpected Journey
    Anime & Comics · Adamo_Amet
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588451mth
    Commented

    I have a doubt, Padme and Annie got married but what happened to the protagonist in all this wedding? Will you leave it like that? Because apparently Annie loves the protagonist and Padme will have his son.

    Ch 79 Under the Radar
    altalt
    A Perverted Galaxy Far Far Away (Star Wars AU)
    Movies · CambrianBeckett
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588452mth
    Commented

    Tengo una idea y si usas esas historias en tu otro fic el del gordo aun se podría ya que si usan aun magia y fantasía no lo dejaste tan desarrollado para no poner cosas de la vida real, ey curioso usas lo viejo para dar algo nuevo como con McDonald y sus comida

    Ch 398 Capítulo 372: Alma gemela
    altalt
    No Otaku con Harem System (Versión Español)
    Anime & Comics · Bukaro
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588452mth
    Commented

    Esta historia vive no por la frecuencia sino por la calidad

    Puedo entender si en algún momento ustedes pierden interés por mi falta de constancia y constantes problemas que me impiden escribir. La verdad es que mi vida y yo mismo somos un desastre, así que mis historias son un mayor desastre.
    altalt
    No Otaku con Harem System (Versión Español)
    Anime & Comics · Bukaro
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588452mth
    Commented

    Doble diversion yay es hora de joder a Luis solo traigan al hermano de navi

    "Esa perra está haciendo bullying a mi Senpai… Mi rol de adorable y fastidiosa kohai está siendo usurpado…" – Desde las escaleras pude ver una penetrante mirada carmesí que desprendía un intenso intento asesino…
    altalt
    No Otaku con Harem System (Versión Español)
    Anime & Comics · Bukaro
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588452mth
    Commented

    Rayos otra bandera prepárense para la violacion inversa

    "¡Hey Listen! ¡El perro es tan buena ama de casa que un día vendrá un delincuente rubio para chantajearla ajajajaja! ¡Típica esposa japonesa!" – Navi… voy a vomitar….
    altalt
    No Otaku con Harem System (Versión Español)
    Anime & Comics · Bukaro
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588452mth
    Commented

    El mejor recurso ¡GALLETAS!

    Me encogí de hombros. – "Si nos ayudas puedo darte una galleta" 
    altalt
    No Otaku con Harem System (Versión Español)
    Anime & Comics · Bukaro
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588452mth
    Commented

    Traps just that word you already put a little cloth better use it

    Ch 29 Chapter 29*
    altalt
    Perversion Doulou Dalu
    Others · just_a_potato_soul
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588453mth
    Commented

    Poison ivy x harley para el haren

    Ch 30 Fighting , Eating, *******
    altalt
    Life Can Change || DC x Invincible Fic
    Anime & Comics · TheManUnderTheBed
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588453mth
    Commented

    Put Lyn from Tech Jacket in the harem, we already have the blue beetle in DC, we don't use the fake Iron Man Peter Quill, please, if you don't like this trick on Lyn, please give it a like

    Ch 29 All Hell Breaks Loose
    altalt
    Life Can Change || DC x Invincible Fic
    Anime & Comics · TheManUnderTheBed
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588453mth
    Commented

    Ya quiere traerla a casa

    Esto se volvió interesante…. Muy interesante...
    altalt
    No Otaku con Harem System (Versión Español)
    Anime & Comics · Bukaro
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588453mth
    Commented

    Nom Nom Nom Más Nom Nom nom

    "¡Hey Listen! ¡Perras, dejen de ignorarme!...!" – Navi empezó a gritar estupideces, así que agarré un ala de pollo frito y la metí en su boca. – "Nom nom nom nom perra nom nom"
    altalt
    No Otaku con Harem System (Versión Español)
    Anime & Comics · Bukaro
    detail
  • Daoist558845
    Daoist5588453mth
    Commented

    O dios encontraste a tu waifu

    "...…." – Hilda y yo miramos a Navi con desprecio, luego decidimos simultáneamente fingir que no escuchamos nada.
    altalt
    No Otaku con Harem System (Versión Español)
    Anime & Comics · Bukaro
    detail