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SomeoneConcerned

SomeoneConcerned

Lv13

a concerning, concerned reader, who likes ruining everyone's fun by point out cliches and therefore spoiling future chapters fufufu.

2019-02-28 JoinedAustralia
587.2h

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  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Replied to Entrail_JI

    author, I really wanna be on your side. A ton of other readers are being complete a**holes to you and your writing, but the mc has screwed the timeline in many ways; - showing the black market the demon's plans to blow up a dungeon with a baron and behind it, a major step in a third apocalypse. - initiating Kevin's black market contact early - doing stock trading to the point where the main contender in the potion market was after him - the demon's initiating an attack against female protag - said female protag is interacting with him and outside influence - he is making a business deal with another female protag - he leaked important future research, not once, but twice and this is only the stuff he knows about (I.e. he doesn't know about Jin and boss lady demon). The fact that anything is following the main plot is insanely lucky. Also, again trying for constructive criticism, if you want the readers to sympathize you should explore the points you are making. Instead of repeating "I should not make too many timeline changes", which he has already done and stated is unavoidable, he should, as the author, mention that something important happens in his original work stalling the butterfly effect; - Does Kevin go through serious character development this arc? - Is a major villain destroyed or a protag killed with ramifications down the line? - Does anyone go through a major power up or find out about a major plot point/device? - Does this massacre help bring in a major law/ strategy/ person into power? The mc should be bringing this up, helping make the moral quandary of "should I sacrifice 10s-100s of kids for an already changed timeline?" make much sense with context (e.g. "...or should I let the protag not find out about the demon king's main weakness?")

    Excessive meddling on my part could cause future anomalies in the plotline which could create unwanted scenarios like back in the afterparty.
    altalt
    The Author's POV
    Fantasy · Entrail_JI
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Replied to Entrail_JI

    3. upsets me quite a bit, I mean the author has now come up and said that delaying the third cataclysm, forewarning the black market of the demon's plans with their many dungeons; stealing the wnmc's black market contact; stealing both wnmc's and jin's cheat item, the limiting seed and fruit; and stopping a main demoness for a year doesn't affect the main plotline. Does the amc have to write in the wnmc's death before the timeline changes? honestly, knowing what he knows, even when he ends up changing major plot points, is op. Being able to rewrite and view 10 minutes into the future is op. I don't think this whole "the timeline has changed severely due to my presence, but not really" is helping the plot or AMC's character development.

    Mission reward : Rank upgrade [E+ ▶ D-]
    altalt
    The Author's POV
    Fantasy · Entrail_JI
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Commented

    the fact that this is probably the best bit of progression and actual storytelling this far, and there are actually people bagging on this... I'm really feeling for when the author blamed his audience

    'I am such a pussy'
    altalt
    The Author's POV
    Fantasy · Entrail_JI
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Replied to JStyles

    Well the author basically admitted that the first 40 chapters are a half-hearted, Novel's Extra clone with a very beta mc, and that after that chapter mark it "gets good". Many commenters agree and I hope they are right.

    "Dungeon overload..."
    altalt
    The Author's POV
    Fantasy · Entrail_JI
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Commented

    except you said he was at rank ~300 and was about as strong at the rank 75

    Well, that was at least for anything above 300. For ranks between one and three hundred, the strength gap between each rank was quite significant.
    altalt
    The Author's POV
    Fantasy · Entrail_JI
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Replied to shashank_panthri

    D rank talent, currently at G+, which is somehow strong enough to be around rank 300 of the first years and strong enough he had to fake being overwhelmed.

    Ch 15 Virtual reality [3]
    altalt
    The Author's POV
    Fantasy · Entrail_JI
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Commented

    is he... like actually gonna fall for a trap that obvious, by a character is his own book? srsly?

    "Count yourself lucky, I needed an extra helper to complete this task, and since I couldn't find anybody else apart from you, I will generously share the reward with you"
    altalt
    The Author's POV
    Fantasy · Entrail_JI
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Commented

    guys you won't believe this, but I think, quite possibly, the devil possessed villain sent here to convert students to the dark side, might, perhaps, have been sent here to convert students to the dark side and, in doing so, be the bad guy convincing students to join the dark side.

    In doing so he could easily lure students into making a pact with a demon, turning them into villains.
    altalt
    The Author's POV
    Fantasy · Entrail_JI
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Commented

    my problem seems to be the opposite of others here: -Enemy is rank 75 -The mc has a general rank of G+ -The faked being overwhelmed this means that a general level of G is in the top 100 of the first years... the power scaling is wack.

    After confirming his strength, I kneeled down as he intended and let out a fake groan.
    altalt
    The Author's POV
    Fantasy · Entrail_JI
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Replied to BLANK_Z

    for an author, he sure does not understand the tropes he writes into his own books.

    'The luminescent swordsman'
    altalt
    The Author's POV
    Fantasy · Entrail_JI
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Commented

    mhm, I definately love when "smart" mc, with foreknowledge and knowledge on tropes, makes fun of stereotypes and cliches then proceeds to do said things. I mean we already had a young master that the mc went "oh but then he gets better, see not a trope", then we get introduced to a high young sect member with a bloodline superiority complex. Now after the whole "the protag finds a boring but sus seed that turns out to be op, but doesn't use it for forever", he finds a 'boring sus book' that he won't use forever. I don't understand power fantasy books where we are supposed to self-insert to a character like this.

    I thought as I threw the book into the useless pile.
    altalt
    The Author's POV
    Fantasy · Entrail_JI
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Replied to MrKarma

    agreed, would have been less contrived if it went along the lines of: [status] ... {effects} - soul desync "Soul desync? what is that?" he reached for his status for clarification, but his arm didn't immediately obey, as if his arm was lagging a second behind his thoughts. "I guess it's this then..." not perfect I know, but I think this would help with the whole "soul" reasoning while also giving more use to his status than just showing G's.

    I don't know what it was, but maybe it was because my soul still didn't get used to this new body?
    altalt
    The Author's POV
    Fantasy · Entrail_JI
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Commented

    I thought they had TNT not dynamite

    His goal was to destroy the granary of the city; as such, he began to approach the grain stockpile with a stick of dynamite in hand and a match. As soon as he was within range of the warehouse, which contained much of the city's food surplus, he lit the match and used it to ignite the fuse of the dynamite which he threw into the building; before the blast went off, he had already disappeared into the night.
    altalt
    Tyranny of Steel
    History · Zentmeister
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Commented

    ayyy, I take it back. While sappers in the main army would be good as well they didn't forget that small mention of TNT.

    With the use of TNT, you will have a much greater chance of destroying enemy fortifications. The purpose of these actions is to provoke the enemy Lords into marching upon Kufstein, or Innsbruck where Berengar will have seized soon enough. I want them so infuriated that they will feel that they have no choice to end their misery unless they personally take action against our Liege! Thus allowing Berengar to trap them with his armies."
    altalt
    Tyranny of Steel
    History · Zentmeister
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Replied to SomeoneConcerned

    Also by going straight to TNT he skipped nitroglycerin and it's instability till the invention of dynamite... you know the thing so important Nobel prizes exist?

    As winter raged across the Austrian alps, more than one army was on the march, the war for Austria had already begun, and time was of the essence; luckily for Berengar and his forces, he possessed the power of gunpowder and could easily render the once-mighty walls of Castles to ruin in a matter of days. His 12 lb cannons gave him an enormous advantage when it came to siege warfare—something which he would demonstrate to the world shortly.
    altalt
    Tyranny of Steel
    History · Zentmeister
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Commented

    You have TNT used in the mines. The explosive that all modern day explosives are measured against (the kiloton/ne). The best before the invention of the nuke. Who cares for 12lb cannon and gunpowder against stone battlements when you have that?

    As winter raged across the Austrian alps, more than one army was on the march, the war for Austria had already begun, and time was of the essence; luckily for Berengar and his forces, he possessed the power of gunpowder and could easily render the once-mighty walls of Castles to ruin in a matter of days. His 12 lb cannons gave him an enormous advantage when it came to siege warfare—something which he would demonstrate to the world shortly.
    altalt
    Tyranny of Steel
    History · Zentmeister
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Commented

    bit of a divk move here man... do you know how hard it is to wash out non-water soluable pomade?

    "The product I invented to style my hair this way only works on clean hair, though I promise you even if you work up a sweat, with this solution, your hair will stay intact like mine. Though, you do need to clean it off again at night."
    altalt
    Tyranny of Steel
    History · Zentmeister
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Replied to ShadyDemoness

    my problem with this is either a) she believes he is a reincarnator/killed the baby at birth(like one twin eating the other in the womb; not their fault), then proceeded to kill a class of kids and their teacher for no reason. or b) she believes he is an outsider that killed a classroom of kids and their teacher to kill and take her brother's life. in both scenarios he is also the major reason for both their parents' death. She also has the experience of another "psychic parasite" wanting to kill and remove her ego and many others due to it being a "hassle to deal with emotions". Simply pretending to be the og ego doesn't resolve these issues.

    The moment she saw the number, Heima broke out in tears, her expression filled with relief and gratitude. She silently cried, feeling happy.
    altalt
    Psychic Parasite
    Sci-fi · Overlord_Venus
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Commented

    I know this is a nonsense cult world, but why is it on the school that these kids don't have strong wills or pain tolerance. The military puts them in these specific rings/sectors, the military stops people from informing or training these kids for this ceremony. It's just very silly to me, I would understand it if it's a terribly hard procedure that the nurses screw up and kill them, making it the academy's fault, but its stated that it's mostly determined by the student.

    "The results of this month are even worse as compared to October. If we don't redeem ourselves in December, the academy would lose its position and fall lower. My benefits would also decrease and the students joining will also decrease in quality, creating a vicious cycle. Not everyone will be lucky to get a student like Ravis Macht." The principal muttered, summoning the teacher in charge of the November batch, their Induction Ceremony scheduled on December 1st.
    altalt
    Psychic Parasite
    Sci-fi · Overlord_Venus
    detail
  • SomeoneConcerned
    SomeoneConcerned2yr
    Replied to Erik1991

    he was an environmentalist hoping his invention would inspire later generations. Now he is willing to mutate and kill a teacher, kill 27 students, heavily injure two more, put a nurse at risk then kill and take the place of a child. I reckon he has gone a bit insane.

    'Finally!' The blue soul thought, feeling euphoria. Being hidden, striving to hide itself without alerting others, feeling a sense of danger when its memories leaked out to Jyorta, and having to patiently wait in darkness spanning more than a decade, it had all come to an end.
    altalt
    Psychic Parasite
    Sci-fi · Overlord_Venus
    detail