jjeffrey388
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jjeffrey3881yrCommentedCh 34 Looks Can Be Deceiving- jjeffrey3881yrCommentedCh 54 Probation 4
- jjeffrey3881yrCommentedCh 26 Ghost
- jjeffrey3881yrCommented
I guess one way you can alter how op without saying it outright could be implying or suggesting mc could do x thing but not outright reading how they function to a t.( like have sasuke or some jonin guess which genjutsu is mc using but keeps guessing wrong, and gets destroyed by genjutsu alone) plus the powers is introduced too much too fast. I guess let mc genjutsu matured a bit then introduce kenjutsu a bit later? It is too much bone for the broth to boil properly.
Some say he is too op at just being 5 years old so guys please the only people he has fought are Sasuke, Neji, and a genin. It's not like he defeated a jonin or something so chill. And the last thing is the topic of Fuinjutsu. I know it is too good but it has been used in fanfics so so many times that I have no interest in writing it. - jjeffrey3881yrCommented
The homeyness in home cooking like dishes can be attributed to a sense of heartiness, nostalgia. So if you know what you are doing, its pretty easy to replicate.
While the food Benienma cooked had never caused anyone's clothes to explode or disintegrate, each dish she prepared gave the feeling of home cooking prepared by someone who cared. She even stated that her food tasted as good as it did because she put her heart into it and seasoned it with love. It sounded a little cliche, but, as someone who had starved and frozen to death in her first life, Benienma had a slight obsession with ensuring others never suffered a similar fate. She took cooking and hospitality 'very' seriously, so Thomas made sure to pay close attention to everything she taught him... - jjeffrey3881yrCommented
return of the king👑
If you are enjoying the story don't forget to leave a review it really helps motivate me to keep it going - jjeffrey3881yrCommented
Flashback on itself is really interesting. But you forgot an important step, built up. A good flashback imo requries a moderate amount of setup as to no make the readers feel at lost. Too many time where you just dump us straight into flashback with next to no built up. It sort of isolate the flashback from the main story and it feels like reading 2 seperate stories.
Xyrus then sighed, he would like to reveal more of his past but it seems like the readers hate it.detailDimensional Group Chat as the Sorcerer Supreme (A Non-Harem Fan-Fic.)Anime & Comics · SlimeSage - jjeffrey3882yrCommented
tbh, I think the name has a charm to it, kind of like THE DESTROYER OF WORLD, THE KING OF KINGS, THE ALL-KNOWING, John. Type of vibe.
"No? So you chose that name yourself? Not gonna lie that's kinda lame, why would you even choose Doyle? There are so many other cooler names out there. For instance my name, Malice." she said with a bit of arrogance. - jjeffrey3882yrCommented
this one has more potential than the other 2, as it has more consitent timeline and event, imo its more fun to write.
-DXD UNIVERSE - jjeffrey3882yrCommentedCh 23 The Tech Tournament (2)