Chapter 13: The Price of Failure

▯Eri | Gobue | Day 8 | Kuuderun Great Forest, Southernmost Area, Orc Territory

A battle against the Orcs.

I was honestly a bit frightened at first glance. 

They were undoubtedly much bigger than us, which also meant that we were probably outmatched in terms of raw strength and perhaps even speed.

What were we supposed to do against those things......?

My gaze unconsciously drifted toward Ezra-nii. I recalled the sight of the army of dark, shadowy creatures that he had summoned a few minutes prior and felt a little relieved.

We wouldn't be fighting on our own.

It was still terrifying to think about, nonetheless. I didn't want to die. I didn't want to be crushed by the large bodies of the Orcs. Truly, I couldn't be as courageous as some of the other girls.

—I flinched upon feeling something touch my shoulder.

".....You can do this, right?"

It was Rin. She looked at me with concerned eyes.

"Yes…..? I…I mean, o-of course...…"

I didn't understand why she'd ask me this. We were already here, there was no turning back now. Even then, I admired how serious and strong she always seemed. Her sharp gaze held not a trace of fear.

"Are you certain…..?"

However, her voice became cold as she continued.

"Because it seems to me like you don't need to be here."

"Huh...…?"

"Your ears aren't just for show, are they? You heard what I said. This isn't a place where you can just doze off and sleep peacefully. If that's what you want, you can go back to the cave and stay there with the other weak goblins."

I had never heard her speak like this before. I couldn't even form a proper response. 

"..."

"What's there to be surprised about? The current you is useless to us. We need a comrade who'll fight alongside us, not one who's too scared to fight."

"Ah, no, I—"

"All this time, we've come out of every battle victorious. The result today won't be any different. You've seen up close what we have on our side, and yet you still show cowardice. Your trust in Sir is lacking."

Her grip tightened around my shoulder—The same way her words tightened the insides of my chest. The pain was vivid. 

I wasn't the only one nervous. I was just the only one careless enough to actually show it.

"...I understand."

"Words are flimsy. Anything can come out of your mouth, but does that make it valid? Eri, don't deceive me with words. Whether you've truly understood, I'd like to see it with action."

"....."

She sighed, smiling helplessly at my downcast expression.

"We're here to protect each other, Eri. Don't ever forget that. A battle is only worth winning when all of us make out alive. I will not abandon you."

"....."

"But if I am to speak truthfully, I cannot protect you in your current state. Your mind is elsewhere. You will not allow me to protect you."

Her hand that gripped my shoulder finally loosened. She then patted my head consolingly.

Ah…..I see.

She wasn't trying to berate me. Rin honestly cared for my safety. She didn't want me to be here if I was likely going to die. Especially if I were to be the cause of my own death.

It was my fault. The way she spoke was eerily similar to Ezra-nii, but due to that, I could internalize her words properly.

I nodded without saying anything. 

Rin nodded back and silently went back over to Ezra-nii's side, who was in the middle of explaining something to Mei-chan.

That Rin....she was really becoming more and more reliable. Like an older sister, kind of.

Compared to her, I....

I was hardly worth mentioning.

I clenched my fists, watching as Ezra-nii gave a signal to Kanami-chan.

She was holding what he'd called a 'Hunting Compound Bow', aiming it at the lone Orc who stood right outside the clearing.

With her arrow nocked, she pulled back the string for a moment before firing it off.

There were no unnecessary movements. It soared straight and true. In an instant, it pierced through the Orc's eye, killing it on the spot as the arrow tip appeared at the back of its head.

No more excuses. With this fight, I could only give the best performance imaginable.

I'll do better...… Better than anyone else.

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—Was what I had said, but...….

What…what's happening....

Blood dyed the previously vibrant green grass in crimson, whilst corpses littered the ground.

Within my line of sight, I could see Ezra-nii leaping through the air, targeting yet another Orc. It had no time to react. He sliced cleanly with both axes, swinging them across the front of his chest as he immediately decapitated it.

A spray of viscous red splattered against him, staining his already reddened skin. He paid it no mind and continued his rampage. One after another, he left bloody remains in his wake.

More often than not, only a pile of lacerated Orc flesh could be seen.

Even his shadow soldiers—as he liked to call them—were overwhelming the other party to the point of unfairness. Groups of them mobbed a single enemy at a time, ensuring a quick death.

But this was far from the worst of it. If they ever happened to receive critical damage, they would merely regenerate or return to their original forms after being dispersed.

In simpler terms, they were an undying army.

H-how…..why....

I couldn't wrap my head around it. This wasn't a battle from the start. It was a slaughter.

"Oi, Eri! What are you just standing there for!? Fight!"

Rin yelled from close by.

Ah...

I had gotten distracted. Distracted enough to let an enemy slip by unnoticed.

All eight of us were in a formation. It was supposed to be fluid, yet I had nearly failed them.

"Hah!"

*SPLACH!*

It was only due to Rin's rapid response that no one had ended up injured or worse. 

As usual, it was my fault. I lost focus for a moment and almost cost a trusted friend their life.

That scornful gaze of hers, I deserved it. Just as much as I deserved the heated feeling of shame building up in my heart.

"If you can't come to your senses, then leave the battlefield!"

She yelled before hurrying off to assist the others.

Even at times like this, she was still worried about me. Despite my feelings, I tried to move past it and motivate myself, but the thought of messing up persisted.

My performance reflected exactly that.

A downward spiral. There was nothing else I could do except allow my comrades to pick up my slack. My attacks weakened in ferocity, my defenses became unstable, and my chest throbbed with shame and humiliation.

No amount of encouragement would lift my spirits. At that point, I was truly dead weight. A useless body that others had to occasionally protect.

The few shadow soldiers that were originally helping out the entire squad were now focusing solely on parrying attacks away from me. 

Damnit....!

Frustration was just a single part of it. 

We had progressed all the way up to the Orcs cave with Ezra-nii leading the charge alongside his army. I nearly thought my eyes were deceiving me at some point when I saw the shadows of previously dead orcs joining in.

That power. I had no hopes of reaching that level. Though I knew that, it did nothing to alleviate my negative emotions. 

After only a few minutes, Ezra-nii had slain the Orc Chief and carried its head around like a trophy.

We succeeded. Or rather, they succeeded. As Ezra-nii had declared, the Orcs had been officially exterminated.

But...I knew that wasn't the end of it.

Everyone watched him throw the severed head to the side and turn towards me. I lowered my head so as not to meet his gaze.

"....."

"....."

He remained silent, and the others didn't dare to make a sound either. Then, he began walking, arriving in front of me a moment later.

"...!"

I felt a hand grasp my throat.

"....You failed."

Was the only thing he said before walking away with me in his hand.

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▯Ezra | Ra | Day 8 | Kuuderun Great Forest, Southernmost Area, Former Orc Territory

I hate ignorant sluts.

If a list were to be made of all the things I hate, that would be second on the list. Behind; 'bitches who don't submit', of course.

If you're weak, then listen obediently. 

Isn't it a simple concept?

It truly is a wonder how people go through life without knowing these things.

Follow the orders of a bastard who's stronger than you before he forces you to your knees and fucks your throat.

I wish everyone understood this. It's no different from basic math. This isn't the theory of evolution or atomic particles.

You either listen...or you don't.

Some empty-headed people still find it within themselves to do the latter, even while knowing that it will end in complete anal destruction.

At that point, you're just asking for it. No, you're begging for it. Open those crab lips of yours and ask politely;

'Please rail me to kingdom come'.

I'll immediately understand. This is the end result you were expecting. 

In my infinite mind of minds, I would know that this was what you wanted.

—And I would do my best to give it to you.

"Isn't that right, Eri?"

I tossed her to the ground. She rolled like a little worm before coming to a stop.

Don't lower your head. Look me in the eyes so that I can understand.

It's only natural that consequences arrive at those who don't follow instructions.

Especially when you had one goddamn job.

"Do you know why I didn't punish Kanami and Fuuka too harshly?"

I looked down at her quiet figure.

"Because I found it cute. I allowed them to take advantage of me, and in the end, they got ahead of themselves."

She remained silent.

"But this....I warned you. I told you not to let your guard down. Yet you foolishly put your comrades in a dangerous situation. Is this not your fault? Tell me. What should I do?"

Finally, she looked up at me with moist, shameful eyes.

"I….I-I don't...."

"You don't know...? I ought to kill you, that's what."

Her face paled in an instant.

Hey, now. Don't make funny expressions, I might laugh.

"...…As I thought. I can't kill you, Eri. You're too precious to me."

The difference between terror and relief is wonderful.

I slowly walked up to her. 

"Ezra-nii..."

"That's why....I'll have to sully you instead."

*Riiip…..!*

I.....tore the fabric covering her chest.