34. Chapter 34

CARINA’S POV

Bianca's loud cry made me grunt and turn over in bed, I looked at the clock and it was only midnight, so I sat up in bed and rubbed my eyes, hating even more the 24-hour shifts Maya had to take.

-What's wrong, piccolina? - I asked after a loud yawn. - Are you hungry?

The baby cried aloud, tears streamed down her face, and she tossed and turned in her crib - a recent achievement - from side to side, crawling. I picked the baby up and kissed her cheek a few times before pulling the top of her diaper to see if it was dirty, but it wasn't so I sat down in the rocking chair and pulled my breast out before putting it in Bianca’s mouth.

The baby sucked a few times before biting the tip of my breast hard.

-Bianca! - I growled holding my chest not knowing whether or not to pull the nipple out of her mouth. For a toothless mouth, she had unimaginable strength. - Let go of my boob, piccolina!

The baby resumed sucking a few times, swallowing a few gulps of milk before returning to bite my breast.

-Dio mio! What's happening, my love? What’s wrong? - I asked trying to open her mouth with my index finger and the baby soon forgot about my breast to grab my finger and bite it.

When I took my finger out of her mouth, the baby started crying again.

-Oh! - I said arching my eyebrows. - Are your gums itchy and sore? My poor baby...

I put my finger back in her mouth and let the baby bite freely, it seemed to calm Bianca down, but she didn't go back to sleep and every time I tried to give her anything else, Bia cried.

I paced the room, humming a lullaby in an attempt to calm her down, but it wasn't working and within a few minutes she started to refuse even my finger.

I sighed heavily knowing the night would be quite long.

-Do you want da-da? - I asked taking the teddy bear from the middle of her toys and giving it to the baby, but Bianca just continued to scream, cry and kick herself in my lap. - I'm sorry, my love! Maybe some Tylenol will help you?

I tried to put Bianca in her crib but the scream I got in response made me realize that the baby was extra clingy because of her discomfort so I had to handle the syringe and medicine with just one hand. Bianca was screaming so I had no problem pouring the liquid into her mouth, the baby swallowed quickly and started crying again.

I took the pacifier and tried to get it back into Bia's mouth, but she continued to spit it out.

-You don't want your binky? - I sighed. - Do you want my finger again?

I tried to put my finger in her mouth, but the baby just moved her head to get rid of the intruder in her mouth.

I looked at the clock and my saga with Bianca had been going on for over an hour and my exhausted body and my sleep deprived mind was running out of ideas and dealing with it alone was a lot more tiring, so I just put a big coat over my pajamas and grabbed Bianca's bag before leaving the house and heading to the car.

The baby cried all the way to the station, and I just hoped my wife was lying down and not on some fire call.

I wrapped Bianca in the blanket before pulling her off her seat and walked into the station with her bag over my shoulder. I knocked on the door a few times before Jack - who was in reception almost dozing - turned towards me and opened the door.

-What are you doing here? Did something happen? - He was quick to ask.

-Please tell me Maya is here? - I asked, the desperation was evident in my voice and Bianca continued to cry, there weren't so many screams, but the tears were still running down her little face.

-She's in her bunk. - He said. - Is the baby okay?

-I think there's a little tooth coming, nothing I do calms her down and I have a total of two hours of sleep because she spent all night irritated and I didn't know why. - I spoke back to the guy who was walking with me towards Maya's office.

-Do you want me to get Maya? - Jack asked.

-No, I'm going inside. - I replied, turning the knob.

As soon as I walked into Maya's office and closed the door behind me, I saw my wife opening the door to her bunk and frowning at me.

-Carina? What are you doing here? It's the middle of the night! Why is Bianca crying? - She asked a million questions at the same time, and I was just too tired to answer them all now.

-She’s teething. She doesn't stop crying. - I spoke extending my arm and my wife took the baby, taking Bianca to her chest, to her comfortable position and I could have sworn the baby calmed down a little.

-Mommy is here! Mommy is here, princess! - Bianca sniffled rubbing her face against Maya's chest, but the crying didn't completely stop. - What should we do?

-I don’t know. - I moaned rubbing my eyes to try to stay more awake. - I got home and she was uncomfortable and irritable all night, I managed to put her to sleep at 10 and at midnight she woke up. She's sleepy, I'm sleepy, I don't have answers now Maya.

-Sorry, sorry. - Maya said walking from side to side with the baby, who continued to cry. - It's just that if you, the baby expert, doesn't have an answer, I probably won't have one. All I can do is walk around with her in my lap and hope she calms down... Did you try to breastfeed her?

-She's biting my boob now that her gums are itching. - I replied sighing and feeling the beginning of a headache.

Even in the dim light I could see the wet trail on Bianca's face, and I'd never felt so helpless.

-Maybe hot milk in a bottle? - Maya suggested.

-Perhaps. - I nodded slightly. - Do you want to give her to me?

-No, get in the bunk and lie down for a while, I'll get the bottle and the formula from the Safe Surrender. - Maya said and I sighed nodding.

I saw my wife come out of her office with the baby still whimpering trapped in her lap and wrapped in a blanket. I walked into Maya's bunk and kicked off my shoes before flopping onto the bed, closing my eyes immediately and feeling sleep quickly approach.

My rest didn't last long, soon I felt someone shaking me and Bianca's crying returned to my reality.

-She hates formula. - Maya spoke and when I opened my eyes, I realized she wasn't exaggerating. There was formula all over Maya's shirt, her face and neck were dripping with white liquid, and Bianca continued to cry in her lap.

-Oh, Piccolina, come here. - I held out my hands and even though I was tired the thing that upset me the most was to see the baby crying so much. I kissed her cheek a few times before laying her down on the bed in front of me between my legs.

Bianca rolled over and braced herself on my leg, so she was on her knees on the bed, crying heavily, her head thrown back as the tears flowed. Maya took off her dirty shirt and wiped her face and neck with the still dry part.

I took off the coat and shirt I was wearing before pulling my breast out and putting it in Bianca's mouth. The baby began to suck hard, and we breathed a sigh of relief as we heard the baby's crying cease.

-I think she's a little warm. - I said running my hand over the baby's head.

-I'll get the thermometer. - Maya said, finishing buttoning a new shirt.

Bianca rubbed her eye with the backs of her hand and then reached out her palm to my face, resting her little fingers on my cheek as she stared at me.

-I'm sorry you're not feeling well, piccolina. - I whispered to the baby, touching her cheek with my forefinger. A tear trickled down towards my breast and seeing her crying made me want to cry too.

Maya returned with the thermometer, and we found out that Bianca really was feverish, but nothing too serious.

-Ouch! Bia... Don't bite, please! - I asked when I felt the pinch. The baby rubbed her gums against my breast, and I closed my eyes due to the pain. I tucked my finger into the corner of her mouth so I could gently part her gums and took the nipple out of her mouth.

-Let me stay with her for a while. - Maya reached out and took the baby.

I couldn't help but notice how tired she looked too.

-I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come. - I spoke softly now embarrassed for not having thought about how exhausted Maya must be due to the intense hours of work. - I got overwhelmed with all the crying.

-Don't apologize, we're in this together, aren't we? - She smiled at me, and I managed to smile back.

I got back dressed and Maya let Bianca keep her finger in her mouth as I pulled out my cell phone and began researching ways to ease the baby's sore gums.

-Freeze a damp cloth. - I said getting up from the bed. - I'll do it, I'll be right back.

I left the office with a baby washcloth from Bianca in one hand and I wet it before placing it in the freezer upstairs. I leaned against the counter and being away from the baby made me anxious and at the same time allowed the tiredness to become more present.

-What are you doing here? - Travis asked and I jumped, startling me with his voice.

-Bianca is teething, I couldn't calm her down, so I thought the best option was to make Maya share mother’s duties during the night with me. - I spoke and sighed. - Which makes me sound extremely selfish and like a bad mother.

-Of course not, Carina! You are an OBGYN, not a pediatrician. You don't have to know how to handle everything related to the baby... It's okay to need Maya once in a while. - Travis said, rubbing his eyes. - Believe me, she likes it when you need her help.

-I'm the doctor, I should handle these things better. I pinched the bridge of my nose and sighed for the umpteenth time. - I only had two hours of sleep tonight, I was on duty last night, I'm tired. I love my baby, but motherhood is tiring.

-You're doing well, both of you. - Travis said and grabbed a glass of water. - But don't be too hard on yourself, babies are resistant, and you need to allow yourself not to be perfect all the time. Bia will be fine.

-Thanks, Travis. - I gave the fireman a tired smile before he left the kitchen.

I waited a few more minutes and ran back to Maya's office, listening to my wife talking to the softly whimpering baby.

-Here it is. - I said, handing the frozen cloth to Maya.

-Okay, open your mouth princess. - Maya asked, the baby took the cloth quickly to the middle of the gums and seemed to feel relieved with the temperature. - Looks like it's working.

-Thank God! - I sighed in relief. - I'll put another compress to freeze.

I grabbed another rag and went to the kitchen floor before wetting it and putting it in the freezer. When I went back downstairs, Maya had the baby lying on her chest, she was lying on the bed, leaning against the wall and with her eyes closed.

-Lie down with us, let's try to get some sleep. - Maya said and I nodded quickly even though I knew she wasn't seeing me.

I lay down next to my girls and put my hand on Bianca's back as I turned to my side, I made little circles on her back and the cool towel in the baby's mouth was easing her pain - I knew this because her eyes were about to close.

-Sorry I came here, but thanks for being on my team. You are the best wife and the best mother. - I whispered kissing Maya's face.

-I try. -She joked and held out her arm so I could lie on her shoulder. - I love you both.

-We love you.

…

I was in the kitchen preparing Bianca's first baby food, she had just turned 6 months old, and it was time to start the food introduction. There was a pumpkin puree and shredded chicken on a child's plate and cooking for the two women in my life was one of my greatest pleasures.

There was children's music playing through the house as Maya danced with Bianca on her lap bouncing around and making the baby laugh and I never thought I would see Captain Maya Bishop doing something like that, but for Captain Maya Deluca-Bishop this was her everyday life.

-The food is ready! - I spoke in a singsong tone and Maya turned off the music, coming to the table.

-It takes a lot of energy to be a mommy. – Maya complained playfully, lifting the baby into the air, and moving her like she was an airplane eliciting more giggles from the little blonde.

-Okay, okay! Time to stop playing and eat! - I spoke pointing to Bianca's highchair and Maya whispered something in the child's ear before putting her in her chair.

I took Bianca's little dish and spooned a generous amount of pumpkin puree into her spoon and the baby moved her little legs in excitement seeing the spoon coming towards her.

-Wait, wait! - Maya spoke and I stopped in the middle of the action, turning to her if she understood the reason for the interruption. She was fiddling with something on her cell phone. - Okay, go! Bianca's first nearly solid food!

I rolled my eyes and chuckled softly before putting the spoon into Bianca's toothless mouth - there was actually one tooth - and the baby quickly swallowed the food.

-Did you like it? Is it delicious? - I asked making a baby voice. - Here comes the train! Choo-Choo! Open your mouth, Bia!

The baby opened her mouth easily and received the second spoonful, I passed the spoon through the corner of her mouth to clean the excess food that had soiled her and Maya continued taking pictures and videos.

-Here, let me take the pictures now! - I said handing the spoon to Maya.

-Look at all this nutritious food, princess! - The blonde spoke collecting the food in the spoon and I laughed starting to record the video, capturing the faces of my favorite blondes. - You need to eat to get strong and be able to grow.

-Maybe you should stick to the train. - I joked and Maya glared at me before rolling her eyes.

-Babies are people too, Carina! - She spoke again her most iconic phrase and I just pointed to Bianca, who was clapping her little hands on the table in her highchair. - Here comes the train!

-Don't forget the "Choo-Choo!" - I joked and Maya rolled her eyes.

-Choo-Choo! - She said taking the spoon through the air to Bianca's mouth.

I finished the recording and asked Maya to finish feeding the baby while I organized our lunch. Occasionally I would look over my shoulder when I saw that Maya had gone back to talking to Bianca as if she were an adult, not saying anything, just laughing and letting my wife do what she felt good doing.

I went into the living room and started to collect Bianca's toys that were strewn across the rug and tucked them into a bucket before I heard a loud noise and a few giggles. I walked back to the table and found my wife covered in pumpkin puree, Bianca's whole face was dirty and orange as the baby reached up to her mouth trying to feed herself.

-I turn my back for 2 seconds and you two make this mess? - I pretended annoyance putting both hands on my hips.

-I read that it is important to let the baby have contact with their own food. - Maya spoke embarrassed, blushing, but smiling at the baby who babbled and stuck her hand once more in the plate of food, getting dirtier in the process.

-That's after making sure she's fed enough. - I explained and disdained with my head laughing at the scene.

-Aah! - Bianca reached out to Maya, there was some food between her fingers and Maya gently received Bianca's hand in her mouth.

-Why thank you! - Maya told the baby and Bianca laughed.

I let the two of them have their fun, and after all the food was gone, Maya took the baby to bathe with her. I cleaned up the mess with a smile on my face and happy to be able to be living such amazing days with the two of them.

It was good to see how Maya was getting better and getting over Dean's death day after day, little by little, and how Bianca was being instrumental in this process. Our lives had completely changed since Bianca arrived, but now I saw how we were never complete without her.

-Okay, now you're completely clean and smelling amazing! It's much better to bathe you now that you're 6 months old, princess! - I heard Maya talking from the bathroom and I couldn't resist, I went after the sound.

Maya was already inside Bianca's room, placing the baby on the diaper changer and drying the baby's body while she remained just wrapped in the towel.

-Do you need help? - I spoke from the doorway.

-No need. - She replied smiling at me before turning her attention to the baby.

I watched Maya put the diaper on the baby and begin to apply moisturizer all over the baby's body.

-Your belly smells so good! - Maya spoke before sniffing and kissing the baby's belly, who took advantage of the proximity to grab Maya's hair and let out a laugh. - Ouch! Let go of my hair, little one!

I walked over to the two of them, laughing along with Bianca, and helped my wife get rid of the baby's quick little fingers. Bianca smiled at me and faked a cough.

-Someone is learning to get attention! - I joked passing my index finger over the baby's thin and almost non-existent eyebrow.

-Oh, is that what this is? - Maya asked before starting to put the onesie on Bianca. - The other day she coughed like that a few times but stopped when I picked her up from the crib. I should’ve noticed something was wrong with that cough!

-She's fooling you. - I nudged Maya with my elbow and my wife laughed. - How about pigtails? We can try this today, I think we have enough hair for that, right piccolina?

I sat the baby down and handed the brush to Maya, who just stared at me.

-What?

-You will learn how to make pigtails today. - I said with a shrug. - Start by dividing her hair into two parts.

I talked the hairstyle step-by-step, helped by handing her the elastics and after a few minutes - with Bianca starting to complain about sitting with just a toy as a distraction for so long - she was ready.

-Look at this! - I said clapping my hands. - You did it, Bambina!

-I really did it! - Maya smiled at the baby, pinching Bianca's cheeks between her thumb and forefinger. - You look pretty cute, princess!

-See? It's all a matter of practice! - I said smiling to my wife and got a smile back.

-Da-da! - Bianca said, throwing the toy car that was in her hand on the floor.

-I'll get the teddy bear and stay with Bianca; you should get dressed. - I kissed Maya's cheek before picking up the baby and cradling her on my hip.

In the living room I took the teddy bear dressed as a fireman and handed it to Bianca - who was quite happy to have her favorite toy in her hands - before sitting down with her on the floor. She was so grown up, sitting by herself and laughing showing the world her full one tooth, and my heart clenched not understanding how 6 months had passed so quickly, and at the same time, almost wanting the years to fly by so I could see very soon every new milestone in my baby's life.

-A penny for your thoughts? - Maya said sitting beside me, Bianca squealed and showed Maya a toy that was in her hand before immediately taking it to her mouth. - We need to start cleaning these toys more often, she puts everything in her mouth.

-It's important to strengthen her immunity. - I shrugged.

-What were you thinking? Before I sat down, I mean. - The blonde laid her head on my shoulder, and I turned my face to kiss the top of her head.

-Just about how she's grown up. - I spoke softly. - I don't know if I want the days to pass quickly or slowly...

-Slowly. - Maya just said. - I want to enjoy every second around you two.

-Me too. - I whispered and gave Maya one more kiss before picking up the baby after a yawn. I laid Bianca on my arm and Maya sniffed the baby's head a few times causing Bianca to smile and being there, with both of them, was my idea of perfection.