thirteen

I never spoke a word about Naoki to Nozomi, nor to anyone, for that matter. And I believed that was only for the best. After approximately one month of shutting himself away, Nozomi finally abandoned his life as a recluse and went back to school-and of course, I was ready to meet him halfway, claiming the privilege of leading him there by the wrist. His complexion had grown visibly paler, physical strength no doubt still less than either of us desired. But it was okay. Even if he collapsed one day, my legs could be strong enough for the both of us.

I was happy. Nozomi had chosen this out of his own free will. No one else had tried to persuade or guilt-trip him into returning. It was all him. For whatever reason this idea had struck him, the idea that maybe living in solitude forever wasn't such a good idea, I felt immensely grateful for it. This was one step closer to finding his cure.

He still wasn't speaking, though, and to be completely honest there was a part of me that feared I would never hear his voice again. Even if that did happen…I told myself…I could never let him forget the sound of mine.

"You came back just in time for the summer festival, Nozomi," I chimed, beaming regardless of the fact his gaze was on the ground. "Summer vacation starts soon, and every year there's this place near the river where people set up booths to sell food and whatnot; we should go, Nozomi. There are fireworks. I want to see them with you. Don't worry, they're bright enough. You shouldn't have a problem seeing them."

I gave his wrist a gentle squeeze, proceeding to quietly and tenderly lead him into the school building and straight to our classroom. Several of our classmates gasped softly at the sight of Nozomi, and spontaneously they burst into conversation concerning his sudden return to school. A few of the girls seemed to be teetering back and forth mentally as though silently trying to decide whether or not to approach him. In the end, no one did.

No one, that is, except Tomoru.

"You ain't lookin' so great, pal."

The ginger basketball jock approached both Nozomi and I, his arm akimbo, head tilted and one eyebrow quirked. The fact that his eyes were fixed on the blonde boy shocked me, and I actually stepped back for a moment to ensure I wasn't misinterpreting the direction or purpose of that gaze. Surely enough, I hadn't misinterpreted anything, but, presuming that I were trying to escape, Tomoru extended his arm and took hold of my shirt.

"Not so fast, Fire Truck, we have to do this now," he stated firmly, and if I weren't mistaken, I believed to have sensed a hint of offense in his tone.

"T-Tomoru, what're you talking about?"

"Atsushi made plans to do this on the day of the festival, but just in case I can't make it, I wanted to be properly introduced to your special friend."

Nozomi's expression tightened, fists curling and uncurling as his mind reviewed the pros and cons of making eye contact with another human. This wasn't the first time perplexity had taking his being into captivity, but this instance was a bit…different. I simply wished I knew why.

"You're Nozomi, right? Nozomi Sena. The partially blind student everyone gossips about." An audible sigh left Tomoru's mouth after he'd voiced that rhetorical question, brow furrowing for a moment in an open display of exasperation. "Personally, I'm real sorry 'bout them. Should've warned you a lot sooner; not everyone around here's as angelically friendly as Asahi. He's one of a kind, ya know? I hope you're treating him well."

He finally looked at Tomoru-Nozomi, with his eyes opened to their full capacity, jaw slightly dropped, had urged himself to meet the taller boy's gaze, and from his seemingly feeble position in his seat, Nozomi appeared to be trapped in the shadow Tomoru so mindfully casted. But I couldn't sense fear. Not even for a second. The quivering of his lips implicitly hinted at a desire to voice a question of his own, but a switch must have been flipped in his head, bringing back to his attention the fact that he wished not to speak. It was controversial, and undoubtedly unpleasant for him as well.

"It took a lot of guts for me to come over here, I won't lie…" Tomoru let out another tremendous breath, an exaggerated one, clearly, and he cracked a smile for some odd reason. "I'm not as amiable as Asahi, either. Or articulate, for that matter. That is, sometimes it's difficult for me to find the right words, and I'm not…very good at cheering people up, but ya know…in my defense that's something that requires a lotta skill. Mental skill, I mean. Asahi's mentally strong-w-well, I mean he's good at keeping steady…for other people. What I'm saying is…that he's…"

Tomoru turned his face toward the ground, noticeably embarrassed.

"…Asahi is the best kind of person to have around if you, yourself, aren't mentally strong. I speak from experience."

And so my mind's gears turned slowly once again, freezing entirely every now and then just to see if I were paying attention. Tomoru's heartfelt words had struck a cord in me. He was never so straightforward. Typically, in such a situation, Tomoru behaved much more…ambiguously. Because he meant what he said when he claimed to lack articulation. But he always meant well-his actions proved this. However, this time he had somehow managed to convey the truest part of that inner Rubric's cube he called a brain.

And I was undeniably moved.

I still remember thinking at that moment, what greater compliment could one possibly receive? But then I started focusing on the latter part of his message-specifically, his claim to have spoken from experience. For a second, my heart became disturbed in its previously peaceful resting place, and my perspective of Tomoru was drastically altered. All this time, I wondered, had Tomoru been hiding something? Never before had he spoken to me about anything close to the subject of 'mental strength,' but perhaps…all along he had actually been quite similar to Nozomi. Until now, that thought had never crossed my mind.

Tomoru had once upon a time saved me from a life of depression. I never would have imagined I'd have been able to return the favor, even if in but a subtle way.

Now he was carrying on the legacy, reaching out to another crying soul in hopes of sharing the love that had already been spread so far. He, who knew next to naught about this boy save the sprinkling of contemplative whispers from fellow classmates, he, who on most occasions would not hesitate to flaunt any and all of his positive qualities and accomplishments, desired to set himself at the lowest possible standing, placing me on a pedestal instead…

Academically, sure, Tomoru lacked somewhat. By this point I was well aware of that. But today was the first day on which I discovered his knowledge lay on a much more admirable field.

"He chose you…Nozomi…" Tomoru spoke softly, taking a step back as though preparing to leave us. "Take advantage of that."

I wasn't given the chance to say anything to him, but I soon realized that it were probably better if I didn't anyway. I think Tomoru had intended for me to dwell on his words, but without uttering a single thing more to him on the matter. That was his way of coming out of hiding, as well as showing forth his gratitude.

Because of what he said to Nozomi that day, I became even more motivated to see this through to the end. To spread the love, to show him comfort, to prove my devotion, to ensure the continuality of my presence, to witness a miracle that only time could mold.