Chapter 16 - Alabasta Pt 2

I panted heavily as I chased after Luffy's dust trail, doing my level best to keep up with him. Still, despite my best efforts, my 'best', improved as it was, wasn't anywhere near good enough to keep up with as ridiculous a powerhouse as Luffy. It was all I could do to stay in sight of his dust-trail, and dodging around the citizenry and odd marine wandering around wasn't helping matters in the least.

At least I wasn't all that alone on my chase, so to speak.

"CROSS!" Nami howled from Soundbite's mouth. "What the hell do you mean by Marines!? And why the hell didn't you tell us that Mr. 3 was here!?"

"Oh yeah, his ship's near the Merry..." I huffed to myself before refocusing. "And in reverse order, I didn't tell you about Mr. 3 because he's not relevant. He's nowhere near Nanohana at the moment, so you don't need to worry about hiding your faces, and Crocodile's going to jump the gun and take care of him before he can raise any hell for us, so don't worry about the Wax-man. And as for the Marines, well..." I couldn't help but grin eagerly. "Well, even before I opened my mouth Smoker wanted Luffy's head as a matter of pride!"

"And now?" Nami groaned wearily, obviously dreading the answer.

"If there was a chance in hell he'd ever leave us be before, there sure as heck ain't one now!"

"... you are a raging son of a bitch, you know that?"

"And proud of it!" I cackled eagerly. "Now, hurry up and load up on supplies, the desert's going to be hell on earth as it is. Oh, and before I forget, Sanji!" A glance at Soundbite prompted him to shift his expression and voice.

"Yeah, Cross?"

"You're in charge of getting clothes for everyone. Make sure you go with your instincts, got it? The fate of Alabasta might very well depend on it!"

Sanji, and by proxy Soundbite, blinked in confusion. "Um... alright? If you say so, Cross."

"Great! Now then..." I trailed off slowly as I became aware of a rather crucial fact: I'd lost Luffy's trail. "Where the hell is my captain!?"

SMASH-SMASH-SMASH-KA-KRASH!

I blinked in surprise at the trio of explosions that rang out from the alleyway to my next, explosions that were swiftly followed up by a rather impressive cloud of dust and debris.

"I'm GONNA say thattaway," Soundbite deadpanned.

"I'm inclined to agree with you..." I muttered as I made my way towards the devastation. Gingerly peeking my head into said alleyway, I noted the neat holes shattered into the walls.

"Christ on a pikestaff, Luffy," I muttered, not even wanting to consider how much force that required. "Are you a human, a monster, or some freak force of nature!?"

"D: all of the above!" my gastropodal companion snickered.

I started to nod in agreement before tensing furiously as I ran that sentence over in my head. "...That makes way too much sense..." I groaned to myself.

"Gimme a freaking break…"

I flinched back as a wave of heat washed over me, followed swiftly by a very familiar grumbling pirate. Geez, Ace looked steamed, and yes, that pun was intended because the way the air was shimmering around him made that expression all-too-literal.

"Smashing me through several buildings, what kind of world-class idiot would do something like that!?" the Whitebeard Second Division Commander growled to himself.

"Ah, excuse me?" I piped up hastily as I hurried to catch up with him. "Did you just say 'world-class idiot'?"

Ace paused in the last hole, presumably seeing Luffy. I was more preoccupied by the sound of a lighter flicking behind me, which turning around revealed to be Smoker standing in the previous hole, lighting his cigars and looking damn intimidating in the process. I sighed as I realized what was about to happen.

"Oh, this is gonna suck…"

Sure enough, just as Ace began a "Hey, Luffy!", I felt a hand clamp down on my face with all the force of a hydraulic press before slamming me head-first into the hardwood floor.

Did it say bad things about the past few weeks that an impact that should have, by all rights, split my head like an egg only hurt a little more than a common bump?

Yes.

By god yes.

After a few moments of lying dazed on the ground, I slowly managed to work myself up into a sitting position, rubbing piteously at the goose-egg that was growing on my skull. "Owie..." I whimpered.

"Hey Cr'ss!" Luffy called up from behind me, his words thoroughly muffled by the excess of food in his mouth. "Why does th's guy seem so fam'liar?"

"Captain Smoker, the Marine from Loguetown," I informed him blearily as I gingerly poked at the swollen flesh on my skull. God damn that stung! "I'd say we're a bit out of his jurisdiction, but then again we are on World Government soil, so that point is moot."

"Oh, okay."

"Urgh... ow..."

Some groaning next to me prompted me to glance at Ace, who was slowly working himself up with a pained expression.

"Last time I let my Haki slip, even in Paradise..." he growled to himself before focusing on me. "Hey, you. You know my brother?"

"Uh-huh," I nodded before holding my hand out to him. "Jeremiah Cross, third mate, comms officer and tactician of the Strawhat Pirates. Luffy's my captain."

Ace was about to respond...

"AHHH!" Luffy hollered fearfully, no doubt spraying half-chewed food all over Smoker as his neurons finally fired. "TH'T SMOKEY GUY! WE GOTTA RUN, CROSS!"

When he was interrupted by Luffy's hand grabbing onto my shoulder.

I could feel the blood drain out of my face. "Oh no..."

"HERE WE GO AGAIN!" Soundbite hollered as he snapped back into his shell.

And just like that, Luffy's arm went taut, yanking me through the air.

"AAAA-oh, hi Smoker!-AAAAAAAH!" I hollered as I was snapped back against Luffy, the moron dragging me along as he ran at what had to be over a dozen miles per hour.

"Crapcrapcrapcrap, gotta run, gotta run, gotta run!" Luffy chanted frantically as he dashed through the streets.

I opened my mouth to say something... and promptly gurgled in horror when Smoker barreled out of the ruined restaurant, a veritable volcano of rage as he charged towards us. "Run faster! Run faster!"

"RUNNING FASTER!" Luffy concurred frantically.

"TASHIGI!" Smoker suddenly roared. "IT'S STRAWHAT AND CROSS! STOP THEM, NOW!"

I twisted my head around in order to glance over my shoulder and paled as I caught sight of Officer Tashigi falling into a ready stance. "RUN SOME OTHER WAY!"

"RIGHT!" Luffy nodded in agreement, snapping his arm out as Tashigi slashed at him and whipping us up the side of a building, finally coming to a momentary halt on the roof before continuing. "That was close! How you doing, Cross?"

"My arm feels like it's about to be twisted out of its socket, my legs aren't in much better condition, and I think I'm going to either vomit, pass out, mutiny, or some unholy combination of all three," I gurgled miserably as the world spun around me. "But apart from that? I'm greeeeat."

"Somebody STOP THE world, I wanna get off..." Soundbite moaned blearily.

"So you're okay then! That's good!" Luffy laughed happily.

I threw an acrid glare his way. "Do you only listen to every other word I say or something!?"

Before Luffy could respond, he was interrupted by the far too familiar sound of smoke billowing behind us. "WHITE SNAKE!" Smoker roared, flinging his nimbus-like limb out at us.

"OHSHIT!" I yelped, jerking my legs out of reach of the snapping white 'jaws' just in time. Holy shit that was close! Credit where it was due, Smoker was admirably persistent! Well, if he wasn't chasing me and my captain.

"What are you doing here, Strawhat? What's your goal!?" Smoker roared at us.

I dared to allow myself a faux-hurt expression. "Why, Captain, is it so unbelievable that we missed you so much that we sought you out simply for the pleasure of your company?"

"Huh? Really?" Luffy blinked at me in confusion. "I thought we were here so that we could kick Crocodile's ass?"

I shrugged helplessly. "Well that too, but honestly I consider that to be more a civic duty than a goal."

That managed to bring Smoker up short, though he swiftly rallied and redoubled his attempts to recapture us. "What business does a wet-nosed rookie like you have with someone like Crocodile!?"

Intoxicated by the sound of my blood pounding in my ears, I barked out a laugh before jabbing a finger at the Marine. "Easy: we're doing the founding premise of your job for you! Honestly, considering how we're doing this as a favor for the kingdom's heir apparent, I think we might have even more right to be here then you!"

"Hair detergent?" Luffy tilted his head as he looked over his shoulder at me. "I thought that we were doing this for Viv-ACK!"

"HOLY-!"

CRASH!

That was all we managed to get out after Luffy mistimed one of his steps and fell into one of the gaps between the buildings whose rooftops we'd been crossing over.

"Whoops..." Luffy chuckled dizzily.

My opinion on what had just occurred was... conflicted. On the one hand, I'd just fallen from a three-story height and not only had I lived, but I was ninety-five percent positive that I hadn't broken anything from the fall.

That was badass.

On the other hand... the general sensation my body was sending to my brain could be summarized as ooooooowwww.

That... was not so badass.

"Luffy..." I ground out. "By any chance... have you ever heard the phrase... look before you leap?"

"Mmm... nope! Never! Why, is it important?"

"...no, it just explains so much about you... still, at least today can't get much worse."

"CROSS!" Soundbite barked in Nami's voice before he shifted to his own annoyed expression. "You had to say it."

I shrugged slightly, wincing at the ache it caused. "Honestly, I was mostly trying to just move things along. Anyways, what is it Nami?"

"Cross..." our navigator snarled venomously. "We were calmly doing our shopping in peace and quiet, minding our own business, until someone," I could all but taste the poison she put into the word. "Whipped the battleship-load of marines in port into a goddamn frenzy. What the hell did you morons do!?"

"In my defence, I plead innocence by act of Luffy," I deadpanned.

"...alright, fair enough. So what the hell do we do now? Sneak back to the Merry or something?"

"That would be a viable solution..." I conceded before shaking my head with a sigh. "Save that Captain Smoker followed us all the way here from the East Blue and he's going to keep following us, most likely all the way to the shores of Raftel. So really, what do you think the chances are that mere 'sneaking' will help us elude him?"

"Then what's your brilliant strategy for escape?"

"K.I.S.S.: Keep It Simple, Stupid. Sometimes the simplest solution is the most effective. It's why people still use hammers, after all."

"And the simplest solution would be...?"

I winced slightly as I worked my neck back and forth, popping out a few unpleasant kinks. "Get ready to run."

"...I wish that didn't make so much sense."

"You and me both," I sighed wearily.

"Uhhh... Cross?"

"Yeah Luffy?"

"Can we go now? Hiding is boring."

"Yeah, sure thing. Just, do you think you could drag me by somewhere else, please? My shoulder still hurts."

"Oh yeah, sure thing! Hey, Soundbite, which way's everyone else?"

"Thattaway!" Soundbite crowed as he jabbed his eyestalks down the street.

"Perfect!" Luffy whooped as he jumped to his feet. "Come on, Cross, let's go!"

"Aye aye Cap-ACK!" I squawked in panic as Luffy grabbed onto me again, thankfully not by my shoulder. Sadly, the new spot wasn't all the much better. "Nononono Luffy wai-!"

"YAHOO! FORWARDS!" Luffy roared as he barreled out of the alleyway, dragging me behind him by my ankle.

Once again, my opinion of this state of affairs was rather split.

The upside of the situation was that by being dragged by Luffy, I didn't have to push a hundred-and-ten percent from my legs in order to keep up with his insane speed, and thus I wasn't slowing him down.

The downside, of course, was that in my current position, sand was being blown straight into my ass with all the power of an industrial-grade snowblower. Hence, I was a bit... uncomfortable.

I huffed heavily as I crossed my arms, staring up at the sky contemplatively. "I am conflicted..." I mused to myself.

My conflict was brought to an end on account of my head suddenly bouncing off of a buried rock in the street, causing my everything to become pain.

-o-

"Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey Cross. Cross. Cross. Hey. Hey."

"Mmmrgrgh..." I groaned as I slowly came awake, cracking my eyelids open... and becoming aware of the fact that Luffy was poking me in the face.

"Are you sure he's still alive, Luffy?" I heard Ace ask from somewhere out of my field of vision.

"Yeah, I'm sure!" Luffy grinned. "Cross isn't a weakling! Well, he's kind of a weakling, but he's been getting better... kind of? It's confusing."

"NO, YOU'RE JUST a moron!" Soundbite cackled.

Deciding that enough was enough, I announced my return to the realm of the waking by shifting around... and promptly hissing in pain, wincing as I dug my hand under the back of my head. God damn it, was the universe trying to put a hole in the back of my skull!?"

"Oh hey, Cross, you woke up!" Luffy cheered enthusiastically. "How you feeling?"

I... will confess, I'm not entirely sure what happened at that moment. Maybe I had heatstroke from the not inconsiderate amount of sun I'd been exposed to, maybe my temper finally hit a breaking point, or maybe I just went temporarily insane.

In the end, the 'why' didn't matter.

THWACK! "MMPH!"

What did matter was that my fist somehow ended up literally elbow-deep in Luffy's face.

I blinked in surprise as I processed what had just happened before yanking my arm experimentally. I could feel the sweatdrop weighing on my head as my limb stayed stuck fast in my captain's head.

I shot a sheepish grin at Ace. "Ah... Luffy's skull is a bit thicker than I thought. Little help?"

Ace stared at me in shock for a second longer before throwing his head back and laughing his ass off. "HAHAHAHA! Oh man, you really are Luffy's crewmate! Only he'd be crazy enough to recruit someone like you!"

"Yeah yeah, I'm a crazy son of a bitch worthy of the Grand Line, that's both a compliment and an insult. Now help me before Luffy asphyxiates! God knows that he didn't get enough air at birth as is..."

"Nah, I know for a fact Luffy chewed on the bars of his crib as a kid," Ace said with a grin.

A grin I matched. "Lead paint?"

"He swears up and down that it tasted like chocolate."

"'ut it 'id!" Luffy muffled out.

"HOOHOOHOOHAHAHAHEEHEEHEE!" Soundbite cackled madly.

"But, ah, seriously though." I planted my foot on Luffy's shoulder and tugged, distending his face a bit but nowhere near enough. "Get. Me-!"

In a flare of flame, Ace was behind Luffy, grabbing the nape of his neck and yanking back, hard. Thankfully, the force was more than enough to release his face's grip on my arm with a very satisfying POP!

"Thanks," I said, shaking my hand out in order to try and get some feeling back. "I was afraid we'd have to resort to our first mate's brand of back-alley surgery. I don't know about you, but I like having two hands, thanks."

"That's… Roronoa Zoro, right?" Ace replied, still grinning. "Good choice there, Luffy."

"He's been training me, so my bruises and I sorely beg to differ!" I jabbed my finger up pointedly.

"Heh, yeah, Zoro and everyone else on my crew is pretty great!" Luffy snickered as he rubbed a finger beneath his nose. He then clapped Ace on his shoulder. "I know I already said it, but it's really great to see you again, Ace! I've missed you a whole lot!" His face then twisted up in confusion. "But what the heck are you doing in Alabasta anyways? Cross told me that your new captain Whitestache-!"

"Beard!" Ace and I corrected with different degrees of heat.

"Whitebeard is on the other side of the world! How come you're so far away?"

That question caused me to freeze up furiously.

"ZEHAHAHAHA! WITH THIS POWER, I WILL BECOME THE KING OF THE PIRATES! ZEHAHAHA!"

I shuddered heavily at the thought before waving my hand frantically. "Ah, before you answer that, mind if I say something?"

The brothers looked at me in confusion. "Uh... sure thing Cross, what is it?" Luffy tilted his head inquiringly.

Upon gaining the attention I'd been seeking, I promptly froze up. I knew that this day was gonna come eventually, but damn if it being here didn't make it any easier. Nevertheless... it wasn't like I had any other choices. Not saying this would be just as bad as if I'd never said anything at all. Best to get it over with.

I bit my lip hesitantly before poking my fingers together sheepishly. "I... look, Luffy, what I'm about to say... chances are you're going to want to punch my head off my shoulders for it. And... you'd be well within your rights to do so. The both of you. Just... fair warning, alright?"

Luffy frowned in concern. "Cross, does this have anything to do with 'that'?"

I winced guiltily. "It's... it's a part of 'that' that I didn't tell. That I couldn't tell you until now, when Ace was around. I'm really sorry I didn't, but I swear I had my reasons. Good reasons, not like last time. Alright?"

Luffy pursed his lips in thought for a moment before nodding solemnly. "Okay then. What is it?"

Ace, for his part, was looking at us like we were both crazy. "Uh... what are you talking about? What's 'that'? And Cross, what could you possibly-?"

"Over ten years ago, you and Luffy had a third brother named Sabo."

Ace's voice died in his throat as he stared at me as though I'd just grown a second head. Before he could say anything, however, I forged on.

"When you met him, he made himself out to be a street rat like you, but the truth was that he was an ex-noble, emphasis on the word ex because for those who can't conform, life as a noble is hell, so he got the hell out of dodge. Despite not being related by blood, all three of you were just as close, closer even. However, after the noble's plan to immolate Gray Terminal and everyone living within, Sabo decided to flee Goa Kingdom and set out on his own to be a pirate. Sadly, he left on the same day a World Noble arrived at the Kingdom. The Noble fired upon and destroyed his ship for the dual crimes of flying a pirate flag... and because Sabo cut off the Noble's ship with his own."

If I'd grown a second head before, I might as well have turned into Blackbeard then and there the way Ace was looking at me.

"How...?" he started to grind out before I cut him off with a raised hand.

"That part..." I said slowly, glancing at my captain, who'd angled his hat over his eyes. "Was the part that Luffy knew I knew. But what I'm about to say... this is the first he'll hear of it." That got Luffy's attention, if the eye he was looking at me with was anything to go by.

The temperature slowly started to crank up as Ace took a step towards me, angling himself so that he was standing in front of Luffy. "What are you talking about?" he asked menacingly.

I swallowed heavily, clenching my eyes shut along with every other muscle my body had available. This... was going to hurt.

"Sabo is alive."

SLAM!

"GRK!" I wheezed out around the iron-hard grip that had grabbed my throat and rammed me into the nearest wall available. Spots danced in my vision, but it was hard to tell whether they were from the minor concussion I was no-doubt starting to develop or from the flaming fingertips hovering mere inches from my face.

"Mother!" Soundbite yelped as he snapped back within his shell.

"I'm-not-lying-I'm-not-lying-I'm-not-lying-oh-dear-god-don't-kill-me-I'm-not-lying!" I babbled desperately, fighting to maintain what little control over my bladder I could manage. Honestly, I'd probably be laughing my ass off if doing so didn't guarantee a swift and fiery death by pissed-off-brother.

"Yeah, I bet," Ace growled viciously, the air around him starting to very visibly shimmer. "It's a shame, I actually thought you were a decent guy. Second time I've been wrong. Only this time, you're not getting away."

"Ace!" I dimly heard Luffy shout. "Let go of my Commie!"

"Luffy, you can't actually believe this shit, right?" Ace snarled. "Even you're not that gullible."

"Did anyone… find a… bo-ARGH?" I managed to wheeze out before Ace squeezed my windpipe shut.

"Don't you fucking dare imply that!" he snapped. "He was blown to fucking bits! There was nothing-!"

"Ace, ENOUGH!"

"Luffy-!"

"Cross already lied to me once and he hated every second of it! He wouldn't do it again! I trust him!"

"But-! He's talking about Sabo!"

"He hasn't been wrong before, and I trust him! Now let him go... or else."

Throughout this exchange darkness had been slowly creeping up the edges of my vision. I was just about to black out when Ace's grip loosened just enough to let me gasp in a trickle of air.

"Talk fast."

"World Nobles can't shoot worth shit," I squeaked out, fighting to keep my increasingly muddled thoughts straight. "The bastard hit Sabo's boat, but he didn't hit Sabo. The reason no body was found was that there was no body. He was rescued."

"By who?" Luffy asked hastily.

"The same people... who rescued the people of Gray Terminal... before they burned," I gasped out. "Dragon... Dragon and his Revolutionaries. Dragon rescued him, they nursed him back to health-!"

"Sabo would have come back if he was still alive!" Ace barked viciously.

"He didn't remember you- literally!" I tacked on swiftly as the Fire-Man's fingers flared. "He didn't get out unscathed, he had amnesia, has amnesia. The-the only reason he knows his own name is that it was sewn into the lining of his hat! Everything before getting blasted was a blank!"

"Then why didn't they just take him back to Goa, huh? Why take him along!?"

I shook my head miserably. "Sabo's love for you was strong, but his hatred of Goa was stronger! Every fiber of his being screamed at him to not go back to Goa, and the Revolutionaries accepted! They took him with them! H-he's still with them, he's Dragon's chief-of-staff, he's alive, I swear it!"

Ace stared at me unreadably for a moment before finally releasing me and stepping back, allowing me to slump against the wall as I hacked and coughed miserably, massaging my bruised and burnt throat all the while.

"T-thank y-!"

"Say it again."

I blinked in confusion as I looked up at him. "Wha-?"

And just like that, the words died in my throat... no, no that's not right. It wasn't anywhere near that simple. My breathing stopped, my heart stilled, my soul withered... it wasn't just my words that died... I died. For a brief, brief moment... it was indescribable, really.

Where to start...

The sun, I guess, would be a good place.

Imagine it: a nuclear ball of flaming gas and plasma, massive and hot beyond all reason, beyond all sanity, all imagination. Imagine all that fire and heat and light and power...

Then imagine you, a meager, puny, insignificant person, infinitesimally small on the cosmic scale... were standing in front of it.

Just... try and conceive of it: an absolute nothing like you... standing up against the might and power... of a fact. An absolute goddamn fact of the cosmos.

Staring at Ace, at that moment... that was exactly what it felt like. Absolutely, legitimately what I felt like.

"Say. It. Again," he stated.

As shivers wracked every inch of my body, I became aware of the fact that at some point or another I'd fallen to my knees. Then I realized that I was crying. Then I realized that Soundbite was lying K.O. on my shoulder, foam bubbling furiously out of his shivering shell. Finally... I managed to force myself to speak.

"I swear," I breathed. "I swear to god, I swear to the devil, I swear on my friends, I swear on my friendship with Luffy, I swear to you. Sabo is alive and well. I did not, would not lie."

And just like that it was over, allowing me to collapse forward on all fours. I dry-heaved repeatedly as I grappled with my entrails.

Holy fuck. Welp, it was fucking official: Conqueror's Haki. Never again. Once was equivalent to a religious fucking experience, and Ace wasn't anywhere near the worst this world had to offer!

Then again, I'd gotten a close-range blast directed specifically at me. A more general burst was probably not as bad.

… Now I kinda wonder what that would feel like.

... I might have something of a problem.

"He's alive..."

"Huh?" I blinked at Ace in confusion.

The Second Division Commander was supporting himself against one of the walls, visibly fighting to stay upright. Honestly, if the joyous expression on his face was anything to go by, I couldn't find any fault with him.

"He's alive... Our brother's alive!" he repeated to himself rapturously, tears of joy streaming down his face.

It was a true testament to Ace's will that as fast as he broke down, he managed to pulled himself back together. This was especially fortuitous on account of how he was able to hastily tackle Luffy and force his mouth shut, keeping him from literally bouncing out of the alley in his ecstasy.

"Quiet you idiot, do you want the Marines to hear you!?" he hissed frantically.

"Or Baroque Works for that matter, the town is crawling with Billions!" I added. I grinned at the bemused look Ace shot me. "We're going up against Baroque Works, a top-secret criminal organization sowing unrest and anarchy in the kingdom."

Ace rolled his eyes with a sigh. "I should have figured. Who's the boss? Anyone I know?"

"IT'S GONNA BE LUFFY vs. CROCODILE!" Soundbite whooped. "Kickass TO THE MAX!"

That got an impressed look out of Ace. "Barely even... what, a month?"

"Mmm-hmm!" Luffy mumbled out with a nod.

"Barely even a month and you already managed to piss off a Warlord. I don't know if that's a world record or a testament to your lucky stupidity."

"Eh, a little of column A, a little of column B, in my opinion," I waved my hand side to side.

"HA! Fair point!" Ace barked in agreement before looking down at Luffy. "Now then. I'm going to let your mouth go. Do you promise to not shout loud enough that they'll hear you back home on Dawn Island?"

"Mm-hmm!" my captain nodded.

"He's lying through his teeth, of course," I deadpanned.

"Of course..." Ace sighed in agreement. "Alright, one, two-!" He removed his hand from Luffy's mouth-

"HE'S ALI-grk!"

And promptly squeezed Luffy's throat halfway shut. "Lower. The volume!"

"He's alive!" Luffy choked out, sounding for all the world like a dying squeaky toy.

"Yes, he's alive!" I concurred wearily. "Now all we need to do is stay alive so that you can live to see him. Sound good?"

Luffy blinked as he processed that before nodding reluctantly in agreement. He then tilted his head at me in confusion. "Why didn't you tell me, Cross?"

Ace let go of Luffy as he looked at me. "That's... a good point. Why didn't you tell Luffy this earlier?"

I gave the pro-pirate a flat look as I pointed at the still-stinging burn-fingermarks on my throat. "Because if Luffy came up to you saying how I said Sabo was still alive, you'd have thought me some kind of con man trying to prey on the memory of your brother. After that, well..."

"BURN, BABY, BURN!"

"Precisely," I nodded solemnly as I pointed at Soundbite.

Ace had the decency to adopt a sheepish look as he averted his eyes from me. "Ah... well... I... I'm not that bad..."

"Nah, it's actually a good reason," Luffy nodded in agreement. "You'd totally do that."

"My thoughts exactly," I concurred.

"PRETTY predictable!" Soundbite tacked on.

"Alright, alright, shut it, you jokers!" Ace huffed in embarrassment. "Anyways, shouldn't we be trying to get back to your ship? I'm assuming you know where it is," He directed the question at me.

"Outskirts of town, hidden in the outcroppings. Should be easy enough to find. Come on." I waved for them to follow me as I started to walk down the alleyway in the direction Soundbite jerked his eyestalks.

We calmly made our way through the back-alleys of Nanohana, doing our best to stick to the shadows and avoid the main streets. All the while, Ace and Luffy chatted animatedly as they caught up with each other. For the most part, I just stayed quiet and let them be. After all, this was between them, I had no right to intrude. Overall, it was shaping up to be a rather calm winding down of events...

Until Soundbite discretely bit me on the shoulder. "Lotta guys WITH GUNS and swords coming our way. Not marines," he hissed.

I clicked my tongue in annoyance. Billions. Damn it, and if Soundbite IDed them by their weapons, then that meant that there were doubtless more watching us without weapons, ducking Soundbite's notice. Well, at least I couldn't complain about things being boring, could I?

"Hey, Cross."

"Hm? Yeah Ace?" I glanced over my shoulder at the New Worlder.

"Not that I don't appreciate what you've told us, but, well..." Ace spread his arms with a shrug. "How the heck did you know everything you knew? I can accuse you all I want, but... there's just no way in hell you're from Goa, or Gray Terminal, or Dawn Island... in fact, I don't think you're from the East Blue, period. And I'm guessing from the way you were unconscious you don't have a Devil Fruit, so... how could you know about Sabo's existence in the first place?"

I hesitated as I considered whether or not to tell him then - I was going to tell him either way, it was just a question of when - before focusing on a pair of items ahead of me. I grinned eagerly as I jogged up to them. "I'll tell you what, Ace! I'll tell you how I know what I know once we get to the Merry, and some extra..." I spun around and held out two four-foot-long lengths of pipe to the brothers. "And in return, you guys show me how two-thirds of the Gray Terminal brothers get things done. Deal?"

Ace and Luffy blinked at me in confusion for a second... before visibly putting themselves into relaxed positions as I purposefully glanced at the rooftops.

"Sounds fair to me," Ace shrugged as he took one of the pipes, giving it a contemplative swing. "What about you, Luffy?"

"Weeell, it has been awhile..." Luffy mused as he weighed the pipe in his hand. "I mean, I can hit a lot harder than this, you know?"

"What's wrong, little brother? Afraid you might be rusty after so long?" Ace teased.

"Heck no!" Luffy huffed indignantly. "I can kick anyone's ass any way any day! I'll kick the asses of the Baroque bastards trying to sneak up on us no problem!"

The air seemed to freeze around us as Luffy spoke those words.

Finally, Ace and I directed flat glares at him. "You moron," we chorused, each of us facepalming.

And just like that, things went straight to pot as a half-dozen Billions jumped down, brandishing daggers, swords, and other sharp things. One of the Billions was even sporting spiked boots, of all things!

"No Devil Fruit abilities, okay, Luffy? We want to give these guys at least a sporting chance," Ace drawled nonchalantly as the Baroque Works agents fell.

"Sure!" Luffy said, grinning. "Wanna see who can take down the most?"

"You're on."

"Uh, guys?" I said nervously as the agents fell closer and closer.

I needn't have worried. With a mighty shout of "FORE!", Ace and Luffy swung their pipes, each of them hitting three agents and sending them flying over the buildings hemming us in.

"Who's next?" Ace taunted, tapping the pipe on his shoulder. The cocky grin on his face didn't diminish in the least as another pack of agents filled the ends of the alleyways, aiming pistols and muskets, with some sort of sword-armed leader in the back.

"Meet you there, Luffy?" Ace grinned.

"Sure!" Luffy replied, grabbing me by the waist and slinging me over his shoulder.

I sighed at the manhandling, but at this point I was pretty resigned to the fact. "Just remember that I'm not bulletproof, okay?"

"Gotcha!" And with that, we were off.

Clearly, the agents had not been expecting their prey to have the audacity to actually attack them, because they just stared blankly as Luffy planted his sandal in the face of their leader and drove his head into the ground with a sickening crack. Behind me I could hear a similar, yet different crack that sounded suspiciously like a musket impacting a skull.

Sadly, the paralysis only lasted for a second before the agents whirled and aimed their guns back at us.

"They took out Billy!" one of them cried - actually cried, tears streaming down his cheeks and everything. "Get 'em!"

Too bad for them Luffy was already crouched right in the middle of their formation. A fact which was not terribly comforting as Luffy shifted his grip on me to a two-handed one.

"Luffy…" I said with mounting dread. "What are you-"

"Cross, go as rigid as you can," Luffy said softly, the shit-eating grin on his face not wavering a bit.

I felt the blood drain from my face. "Captain, don't you fucking-!"

My inner ears declared a revolution as Luffy swung me around like a goddamn polearm, my head slamming into the thankfully soft gut of one Billion as my feet hit the… well, somewhere in the torso. Then Luffy shifted his grip to my feet and slammed my shoulder blades into something once, twice, three times!

"Well, that went well," Luffy remarked as he carefully placed me down on the ground.

"Yeah, sure…" I mumbled as I wobbled around, trying to get my equilibrium. A task not helped by the massive bruise I just knew was spreading across my back and the pounding headache trying to turn my brain into mush. "Just use me as a ragdoll, it's not like I'm human, it's not like I have soft squishy bits that break when you hit things with them. It's not like-!"

"Five-THIRTY!" Soundbite barked.

Acting on instinct, I whipped my right forearm up and behind my shoulder, taking great satisfaction at the sound of snapping cartilage that rang out. I then proceeded to drop my arm down and jam my armored elbow into the bastard's gut. I topped it all off by spinning around and snapping my baton out in one motion, using the momentum to give the bastard what I hoped was a very impressive concussion.

I grumbled darkly as I collapsed my weapon and slid it back into its place in my jacket. "Damn Baroque jackass, thinking that and Strawhat could count as an easy target. Next in line for a number agent? Bull-fucking-shit! And those guys you hit me with are mine too, jackass!" The last bit I directed at Luffy.

"Aww, but Cross-!" Luffy began to whine.

"You got a dozen, let me have some measure of pride!"

"Aww, let your third mate have some credit, Luffy!" Ace laughed as he walked back up to us, happily spinning his pipe at his side. "After all, a dozen or sixteen, it doesn't matter: it's nothing when compared to my twenty!"

Both Luffy and I deflated as we stared flatly at Ace.

"He's really good at making someone feel insignificant, isn't he?" I asked flatly.

"You haven't seen anything yet," Luffy groaned. He then grinned as he hefted his pipe eagerly. "Still, either way, thanks a lot for suggesting this, Cross! It's been awhile since I used a pipe, I forgot just how fun it is!"

"Yeah, same here!" Ace laughed nostalgically. "Guess it goes to show that sometimes you need to get back to the basics!"

"Hey, if you've got a skill, best to use it instead of forget it, right?" I shrugged with a grin. "Well, anyways, if that's the last of them-"

"HEY! YOU! Yes, you, you bastards!" came a voice from up the street. We all turned our heads to see another pack of Billions, these ones manning a pretty large cannon. "You're going down, for my promotion, my comrades, and my promotion!"

"Christ on a pikestaff, how many of these guys does that sand bastard have?" I groaned.

"The Millions are 1800 strong, while the Billions are 200 strong," Soundbite recited in Vivi's voice.

"Oh, right..." I groaned wearily. "Well, where do you think he got all these guys, then? Thugs-R-Us?"

"Funny you should mention that, that's the name of a bar back in the outskirts of Goa!" Ace commented. "Great atmosphere, but the clientele's a bit-"

"STOP IGNORING US, DAMMIT!" the lead Billion finally yelled, pulling the string trigger and firing the cannon straight at Ace, Luffy and I being largely out of the line of fire.

"So, does he forfeit his points if he turns into fire?" I asked Luffy.

"I say yes," Luffy replied.

"Don't count your winnings just yet," Ace countered, still smirking. "I've got something I wanna try."

Holding up his arms, Ace caught the cannonball, letting his arms carry the ball to his chest.

And then he was promptly blown back a few dozen feet into a stack of barrels by the momentum transfer.

"Ow," Ace groaned as he hauled himself out of the pile. "Damn it, how does Gramps do that?!"

"HAHAHAHAHA!" I cackled eagerly, doubling over and slapping my knee. "Oh my god that was priceless!"

"Huh?" Luffy blinked in confusion as he looked at Ace. "What're you guys talking about?"

I fought to get my laughter under control as I pointed at Ace. "H-he was trying to act like Garp and catch the cannonball! But he failed miserably! HAHAHA!"

"Ooooh..." Luffy nodded slowly in understanding.. before falling on his back and roaring. "HAHAHAHAHAAAAA! THAT'S HILARIOUS! HAHAH-ERK!"

Both Luffy and I froze as a wave of heat and presence swept over us.

"I suggest you all start running. Now," Ace snarled viciously.

Luffy and I glanced at one another for a moment... before taking to our heels and bolting out of the alleyway, leaving the paralyzed cannon-wielding Billions where they were standing.

If the screams of agony that followed us was any indication, they didn't manage to escape ground zero.

"So, to confirm, where before mentioning his daddy issues would get me a beating, now they'll get me charbroiled?" I panted desperately.

"Looks like it!" Luffy nodded in agreement. "Now less talking, more running!"

And so we ran, tearing through the backstreets of Nanohana as we made our way back to our friends.

-o-

"So. Luffy."

"Eeyup," Luffy nodded in acknowledgment.

"Cross."

"Yo," I drawled, flashing a peace sign.

"Soundbite."

"DAT'S MY NAME, don't wear it out," Soundbite deadpanned.

"Ace, right?"

"Milady," Ace tipped his hat respectfully.

"So!" Vivi clapped her hands together with a sense of finality. "You all got separated from us in the confusion and had to make your way back to the Merry, which you successfully accomplished, right?"

"Yup."

"Uh-huh!"

"Right."

"That is correct."

"And you had to fight your way past a rather… sizable force of Billions, correct?"

"A little over... what, sixty by the end of it, all told? Maybe more? Either way, Baroque Works has lost the cream of its crop below the Agents," I summarized.

"Mmhmm, I see..." Vivi nodded solemnly. "And you also had more than a few clashes with the Marines, correct?"

"They kept running into us, so we had to kick their asses, yeah," Luffy nodded.

"I see, I see..." Vivi nodded anew. "All this, I understand perfectly well. It all makes sense, it's perfectly logical... I just have one question for you four."

She jabbed a finger off the side of the Merry at the inferno that was still raging in the heart of Nanohana. "WHY THE HELL IS THE CITY ON FIRE!?"

Luffy and I pointed at Ace, a motion Soundbite mimicked with his eyestalk. "He did it," we chorused without remorse.

"Guilty as charged, my temper kind of got the better of me. Sorry?" Ace chuckled sheepishly.

If the way the rest of the crew facepalmed and Vivi's scarlet face steadily darkened to purple, that apology was neither the appropriate answer, nor was it appreciated.

Still, as it was, we were already ten feet deep. Why not burrow in deeper?

"If it's any consolation..." I spoke up tentatively. "There is a bright side. Besides the flames, I mean."

At that moment, I became acutely aware of just how 'royal' Vivi was. After all, only someone with a lot of perrsonal authority at her fingertips could successfully make someone flinch by merely looking at them. "What. Bright side?" she ground out.

"Weeell..." I shrugged carelessly. "Now when Mr.2 and the Mr. 1 team burn the city to the ground, they'll cause a lot less damage? Because, you know, the fire already did most of the-!"

THWACK!

"-GAH!" I cried out as my head snapped back from the blow. I hastily pinched my nose shut as I felt a hot liquid run down my chin. "Son ob a-! You know, for a bacivist, you've god a mean punch! Also, for fug's sake, why is everyone going bor my head today?!"

"Is there anything else you'd care to mention about Baroque Works' plans?" Vivi hissed irately.

I froze for a moment before glancing up at her. "Bomb cabable of ebiscerating all ob Alubarna hidden in da Sand-Sand Clan's headquarters?"

Vivi's eye twitched furiously for a moment until she let out a tired sigh and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Remind me why you're not telling us these pertinent things until we ask again?"

"Begause- Ergh, one second..." I pinched my unclogged nostril shut and blew a wad of blood and mucus out the other. "Ah, that's much better. Anyways, it's because A. Luffy would get pissed if I blabbed, and B. things worked out fine when they happened without my involvement. If I can make some things better, fine, but as for the rest, my personal opinion is thus: Laissez les bon temps rouler."

"Normal people don't consider rebellions 'good times', Cross," Vivi groaned as she massaged her aching temples.

"For the record, just how much has your presence changed already?" Sanji put in.

"Mmm, let's see..." I started counting off on my fingers. "I got Bartolomeo to go out to sea at least two years early, I've been talking shit with Smoker, that's gotta be doing something, I kept Luffy from snapping off Merry's main mast, I kicked Whiskey Peak off early, the Little Garden Affair was, well, the Little Garden Affair, and I took Nami's place at Death's doorstep." I glanced at Soundbite. "Am I forgetting anything?"

The snail rolled his eyes with a sigh. "Besides the obvious? No, you got it all."

Ace whistled in awe. "Okay, I'll be the first to admit: that's impressive. I'd think you were me!"

"Thank you!"

"So, moving on?" I queried innocently.

"Just..." Vivi held her hand up with a sigh. "Are you not mentioning anything else, Cross?"

"Why? It's not like my actions will slowly and irreversibly change everything I know," I snarked, before freezing and facepalming as I processed what I'd just said. "Okay, in my defense, I've taken a lot of blows to the head today." I held my position for a moment as I thought things over before looking Vivi dead in the eye.

"No, I am not neglecting to mention anything else," I calmly lied through my teeth. "Now, can I go and clean the blood off my... everything? Seriously, I've got at least a liter on me that isn't mine and a pint that is."

Vivi sighed in relief and nodded, waving her hand for me to go.

The second I was behind her back, I shot a look at Nami and Zoro. If the stares I got back were anything to go by, they understood perfectly that we needed to talk later.

And they weren't the only ones I had to talk to. Once I was sure the trapdoor to the guys' room was shut, I tapped my ear. "Ace, and keep it quiet." A moment's wait and I heard the whine. "Get away from everyone when you can and meet me down here, quietly. We need to talk."

It was a true testament to Ace's skills and abilities as a Logia when, ten minutes later, a stream of fire slid through the Going Merry's planks and into the room, swiftly solidifying into a familiar corporeal form.

I glanced up at the planks contemplatively before whistling in awe. "Goddamn, and not even so much as a scorch mark. It's official: while the overconfident idiots might die young, true-blue New World-grade Logia are terrifying."

"Thanks for the compliment," Ace nodded gratefully. "Now then, you wanted to talk?"

I winced and started scratching the back of my head uncomfortably. "Yeah... listen, Ace... fair warning: you're going to want to turn me into a briquet just as much as before, and with just as much reason. But this time... I am begging you to hear me out."

Ace stared at me silently for a second before tilting his hat down solemnly. "That bad?"

"Perhaps even worse."

The Division Commander was silent for a moment before nodding. "I'm a mature adult, I can take it. Hit me."

"Right, right..." I pursed my lips before sighing and speaking. "Alright, I'll make this short and sweet: you need to either seriously rethink your strategy for dealing with Blackbeard or abandon this crusade flat out, because if you don't, then I guarantee you that you, Whitebeard, and the Whitebeard Pirates as a crew will die."

Ace visibly flinched, the temperature of the room spiking as he visibly fought against his entire being in an attempt to keep from jumping across the room and doing something unspeakable to me. He fumed silently for a moment before glaring darkly at me. "Talk fast."

I sighed in immense relief before hastily collecting my thoughts and dredging up the argument I'd come up with. "Marshall D. Teach might seem like a fat bastard, and he really is one, but the truth of the matter is that he's a fat bastard who is leaps and bounds above your weight class. He's a genius tactician capable of utilizing grand strategy and... I think game theory? Point is, his mind is as vicious as his powers, and the Dark Dark fruit is terrifying enough as it is. If you try and take him on in a straight fight, you will get your ass handed to you."

Ace opened his mouth, to say something, but I swiftly held my hand up. I then slowly pointed at my left eye. "He scarred Shanks," I stated firmly. "Before he got his Devil Fruit. Before Shanks lost his freaking arm. Whether it was before or after Shanks became an Emperor, I don't know, and in the end it doesn't matter. To this day, Shanks is wary of him. He's even going to go to Whitebeard, with a gift, in order to get him to order you back. Whitebeard will refuse... and that will be a fatal mistake."

Ace swallowed heavily as he mulled what I said over. "How... how will him killing me do anything but bring the Whitebeards down on his head?"

I bowed my head solemnly. "Because he won't kill you. He'll hand you over to the Marines so as to become a Warlord. He becomes a Warlord, he gains access to Impel Down. He gains access to Impel Down, he gains access to a meat market of the vilest, evillest, most down and out monstrous specimens of humanity this world has to offer. He'll have access... to the perfect members of his crew.

"Do you see what I'm saying here? The Marines will try and execute you. They will effectively declare war on Whitebeard, and he will respond with gusto. That fight will rock the world to its core, to its very foundation. It will be known as the War of the Best, and it will change the very face of this planet. All because Blackbeard wanted a recruitment drive. Do you really think that you can deal with someone like that alone and come out on top? That anybody can!?"

Mercifully, Ace's expression showed the appropriate amount of fear. Unfortunately, however, he also had a glint of stubborn, stupid, braindead pride and duty in his eyes that made me curse furiously.

"Son of a-! Goddamnit man, you died in Luffy's fucking arms!"

That got a jolt out of him. "No no no, you can't let him get close to that kind of a shitshow, you need to stop him-!"

"Stop him!?" I demanded, flinging my arms out wide. "For the love of god, Impel Down couldn't stop him, the full force of the fucking Marines couldn't stop him, nothing stopped him from getting to you, from rescuing you! He fought as long and hard as he could until you were home-fucking-free! What the hell do you think I could do to stop that!?"

Ace made to respond, then hesitated. "Wait... if we were really home free, then how-?"

"You were killed by the exact same thing that's driving you headfirst to death now!" I snarled as I jabbed him in the chest. "Lethal amounts of fucking bullshit pride! You couldn't stand listening to Akainu badmouth Whitebeard, you couldn't suck it up for ten fucking seconds and you died because of it!"

The Flame-man's face screwed up in anger. "Hey, Whitebeard-!"

"Yes, Edward Newgate is practically a living saint, I know that, you know that, a majority of the freaking New World knows that!" I spat. "And the words of an arrogant, vile blowhard of a volcano will never, ever do anything to change that! And because you couldn't accept that, because you had so little faith in your captain, your father..." I snarled directly in Ace's face. "You died. In Luffy's. Arms. He blacked out and went on a grief-stricken rampage for almost a day! Sabo read about it in a newspaper, remembered everything, and went into a coma for three!"

Ace opened his mouth-

FWOOSH!

-and I reduced it to a cloud of flames as I whiffed my hand through it. It didn't hurt him, but at least it shut him up.

"Luffy blamed himself," I hissed irately, so far past the point of calm at this point. "He fucking blamed himself. He questioned himself. He said he was weak. He questioned... how someone as weak as him... could ever be King of the Pirates."

That did it. I could see it in Ace's eyes: the hurt, the shock, the misery... I hadn't managed to kill the flame of vengeance, no, I had no illusions of that... but at least now there was a seed of doubt in his determination, one that he couldn't ignore.

Ace was deathly silent for what felt like an eternity before looking at me with a mix of emotions. "I can't let Blackbeard go free," he stated, though this time it was more with resignation than conviction.

I resisted the urge to punch him again in favor of sighing in relief at what progress we'd made. "And honestly, that's fine by me. I want that bastard as dead as you do. Just... all I'm asking is that you go in neither halfcocked... nor alone. Call in the rest of the Whitebeards, find Sabo in the Revolutionaries and ask Dragon for help, swing by Fishman Island and talk to Jinbei, call in favors from Big Mom, Kaidou, Shanks, hell, call Garp for backup if you need to, just get some freaking help! If you fight alone, then you're screwed. If you fight with someone at your side..." I spread my arms helplessly. "I can't guarantee victory, not against him... but I can at least say with confidence that you stand a chance. Get me?"

Ace contemplated things for a second before nodding slowly. "Whitey Bay and Squardo are both maneuvering on this side of the Red Line, raiding trade ships heading to Mariejois." He grimaced uncomfortably. "It'll take awhile for them to backtrack this far into Paradise, Blackbeard's trail could grow cold..."

I hid my wince at Squardo's name within a disgusted sneer. "Believe me, the trail Teach leaves behind is a mile wide and scorched to hell and back. You won't miss it anytime soon. And if you really want to be sure, I can give you the island he'll probably be at by the time you get everyone together."

Ace's eyebrows shot up in shock. "That... would definitely help, yeah."

I nodded in agreement and started racking my brain. "It's, ah... ah geeze, it was a minor location, not that important, um... it had an old-western style to it, wooden buildings and whatnot, the people were wearing cowboy hats and ponchos, I think. I... think it was named like a fruit?"

"Banaro Island?" Ace asked slowly.

I snapped my fingers in triumph. "That's the one! He'll be there when- well, no unnecessary spoilers, captain's orders, but suffice to say that when Luffy's bounty skyrockets - a second time, anyways - Blackbeard will be on Banaro Island. That's where you can find him and the other monsters following him."

Ace's grin became truly vicious.

"Hey, hey!" I jabbed my finger up firmly. "No going after him until after Whitey and Squardo are with you, Ace. If you face him alone, I guarantee you that your days on this planet will be numbered. Understand?" I didn't wait for him to respond. "Swear to me on your pride as a Whitebeard Pirate that you won't go after him alone, Ace."

"Hey, I-!"

"Swear it!" I demanded.

Ace grimaced painfully for a moment before nodding solemnly. "I... I swear on my pride that I won't go after Blackbeard alone. Happy?"

I nodded and smiled contentedly. "Very much so. Now, let's rejoin everyone else on deck, shall we? Oh, and please, use the ladder. I know your control is impressive, but this is still a wooden ship."

Ace nodded in agreement and promptly scaled the ladder.

The second he pushed the hatch open, I snapped my fingers. "Amp." And there was the whine. "Hey Luffy, just FYI, if Ace tries to fight Blackbeard alone, then I can guarantee you that he's gonna die!" I cocked an eyebrow at the betrayed look Ace shot me. "What? I never swore jack shit, and if I lie to my crew then it's for a reason I've guaranteed is a good one. Your dumbass macho pride sure as hell doesn't count."

"Oh you son of a-!" Before Ace could finish his sentence, Luffy grabbed him by his shoulders and yanked him out.

I chuckled as I listened to Luffy wail and rage furiously up above. Ahh, brotherly love. Too bad my only sibling was a snot-nosed shit who I far from missed, but eh, that was neither here nor there.

I blinked as a thought struck me. "HEY, ACE!" I called up. "IF YOU'VE GOT TIME, THINK YOU COULD LEAVE US SOME INSTRUCTIONS ON A HAKI TRAINING REGIMEN? OH, AND I MEAN ALL THREE! LUFFY'S GOT THAT ONE TOO!"

Maybe it was wishful thinking, but I was pretty certain that the string of curses Ace shot at me was an affirmative.

I shot a satisfied grin at Soundbite. "I think that went pretty damn well, all things considered. You?"

"We ain't COOKIN' WITH EVIL GAS in our own skins. I'LL TAKE IT!" Soundbite nodded in agreement.

"In-deed, my friend, in-deed," I nodded back, a relaxed grin on my face. "Today... is a good day."

-o-

"YOU GRAVEL-MUNCHING SALT-HUFFING MARINE-LOVING RAT-BASTARD!" I roared furiously at Ace's form as it departed into the sunset. That fucking asshat had just fucking screwed me, and after all I'd done for him too!"

"I don't see what you're so upset about, Cross," Zoro mused as he stood next to me, looking over the paper Ace had spent a full five minutes poring over, one I had really pinned a lot of hopes on. "These instructions make sense to me."

I shot a vicious glare at the swordsman. To be specific, I tried to immolate the paper he was holding with both my mind and my eyes. "Oh yeah, they're spot on, alright!" I growled as I snatched the paper out of his hands. "Color of Observation," I tore the paper in two. "Listen really hard! Color of Armament," I tore it into quarters. "Concentrate willpower really hard! Conqueror's fucking spirit!?" I jabbed the paper at Soundbite, allowing him to shred it into fragments. "'HELL IF I KNOW, I'VE ALWAYS JUST GONE WITH MY FUCKING GUT!' RAAAAAAGH!"

"So I take it you're angry," Zoro summarized flatly.

I opened my mouth to shout more... then clicked it shut as I heard a sound that was a lot like barking coming from the coastline we were anchored to. I grinned viciously as I wheeled around, tore across the deck and leapt overboard at the first dugong I caught sight of. "HELLO GUILT-FREE TARGET!" I roared.

As was to be expected, I got my ass kicked, hard. But, in my defense, I'm fairly certain that lasting three minutes against a species that has the words 'kung fu' as part of their name is at least remotely decent. The way the dugong was shaking his head and nursing a few bruises of his own was pretty gratifying, though.

I winced slightly as I peeled myself off the rocks before shooting a savage grin at the animal. "Not bad... best two out of three?"

The dugong blinked at me in surprise before shooting back a grin of his own. "Bring it on, fu!" he huffed in a halfway stereotypical Chinese accent.

I shot a look at Soundbite. "That's racist." If the way he laughed was anything to go by, then he couldn't give an absolute damn.

However, before we could truly get back into a brawl, the dugong's attention was diverted by more pressing matters. More specifically, by Luffy pummeling another dugong into the ground with a single blow.

"Holy crap, he just took down the chief, fu!" the dugong I'd just fought breathed in awe.

"He must be an amazing warrior, fu!"

"We must learn from him, jutsu!"

"The hell happened to the 'fu'!?" I wondered, more to myself than anyone else.

"Please teach us, master, fu!" a crowd of dugongs asked Luffy as they bowed before him.

"Oh god..." Vivi groaned miserably as she slapped her hand to her face.

"Don't worry, I've got this," I reassured her before stepping in front of Luffy and addressing the animals. "Honorable kung-fu dugongs! While on any other day there would be no issue with Luffy training you all in how to fight, I am afraid that now is not the time! We have urgent business in Yuba, which is situated in the center of the desert! You're all hardy, of that I have no doubt, but not even you can pretend to fare well against the ravages of the sands, can you?"

The dugongs milled about uneasily as they talked amongst themselves.

"Besides," I went on with a shrug. "The fact of the matter is that you wouldn't get much use out of training with Luffy anyway. His fighting style is dependent upon his Devil Fruit, and his strength is a product of his lifestyle! If you truly want to become stronger, then it's my opinion that you'll need to see about leaving where you feel most safe and venturing out into uncharted waters. Quite literally!" I jabbed my thumb at the Going Merry. "Personally, I suggest a skull and crossbones. That would all but guarantee you a slew of challenges the likes of which you've never even dreamt of."

More murmuring from the dugongs, though this sounded a lot more positive than before.

I grinned eagerly at the discussion I was hearing, and not even the exasperated stare Nami was giving me was doing much to dampen my mood. "Seriously?" she asked in a deadpan. "The guys told me about Bartolomeo; what is it with you and trying to make people pirates?"

I shrugged with a chuckle. "Hey, in my honest opinion, the more people who oppose the World Government even tangentially, the better. 'Sides..." I frowned slightly. "This isn't just pleasure, it's business: a long-term investment. With or without the War of the Best, the world is still winding up. Big players are bracing themselves, weapons are getting primed and readied... end of the day, a storm is coming in the long run, and the more people we have on our side, the better. And if Bartolomeo or these guys can make it," I nodded at the dugongs. "Then they'll be invaluable in the future."

Nami hummed contemplatively as she looked the animals over. "It's a hell of a gamble."

"Yeah, but if it's not high-stakes then it's not fun. Now, if you'll excuse me..." I cleared my throat and regained the dugong's attention. "Now then, if you still want some form of instruction or training, I can gladly give it to you!" I pointed at our ship. "That vessel is the Going Merry! She's very important to us, and we would greatly appreciate it if you were to take care of her for us. If at all possible, I'd request that you tow her up the Sandora River and guard her from all trespassers who might seek to do her harm! Agreed?"

Another brief moment of conference, followed by the dugongs pumping their fists with a cheer of "AYE-AYE, FU!"

And that was that. The rest of the crew worked on removing our supplies from the Merry while the dugongs got ready to start towing.

Once I was sure that no one was looking, I tapped one of them on their shoulder and bent down next to it discreetly. "If a man wearing women's clothes comes looking for the Merry, let him on board. He'll say he's a friend and he won't be lying. Got it?"

The dugong nodded in acknowledgement. "I'll spread the word, fu."

I nodded gratefully at him before wandering over to the rest of the crew. "So!" I grinned as I clapped my hands. "Shall we go?"

"Yeah!" Luffy started to nod before stiffening. "Ah! No, wait, I almost forgot something!"

We rolled our eyes in exasperation as Luffy jumped back onto the Merry, rummaging around for something before finally jumping off, a giant grin plastered on his face. "Okay, now we can go!"

Everyone else stared at the prize Luffy had affixed to his back while I merely grinned in acknowledgement. "Back to the most basic of the basics, huh?"

Luffy chuckled as he reaffirmed his grip on the pipe he had slung across his back. "Yup! I forgot how much fun it was to use before, so I don't want to forget again, you know?"

"Fair enough!" I nodded in agreement.

"Well, if that's everything..." Vivi turned and started walking into the desert. "It's best we get started. It's a long ways to Yuba."

And so we started our trek, marching through the sands and heat.

I made sure to slow my pace enough that I trailed at the back of our little caravan. I didn't have to wait long before Nami and Zoro joined me in turn.

"What didn't you tell Vivi, Cross?" Nami asked me under her breath.

I shook my head solemnly. "Vivi expects to find a thriving oasis and over six hundred thousand rebels who she can talk down." I sighed heavily. "What awaits us is a dried out husk of a town and one stubborn old man."

Zoro grunted darkly. "And where would the rebels be now?"

"Katorea. A small trading town north of Nanohana."

"What!?" Nami hissed incredulously as she grabbed my shoulder. "Why didn't you tell her!?"

"Because Vivi thinks that Crocodile's plan is merely a venomous snake whose head she can cut off when in reality it's anything but," I shot back. "The truth is that Crocodile's spent years developing and growing a full-blown hydra. We cut off the head, two more will pop up in its place, ready to bite us in our asses. Sure, Vivi could easily talk down Kohza, but that wouldn't do any good. There are Baroque Works soldiers in the rebels and the royal army alike, so even if we got either side to roll over and unconditionally surrender, those sleeper agents would just open fire and start everything up again.

"If we really, really want this whole mess to end, then there's only one viable option. One possible way to well and truly kill a hydra: burn the stumps, stab the heart, grind its core to dust."

"Or, in other words," Nami said slowly, looking like she'd bit into a lemon. "Luffy's plan is the right one."

"Kick Crocodile's ass and dismantle his organization," Zoro summarized flatly.

"Not even that complicated," I shrugged. "Crocodile's arrogant as all hell. He doesn't think it's possible for him to lose and he's structured Baroque Works in such a manner. We take him down, everything else will grind to a halt without him. It's that easy."

"But Vivi won't accept it because people will get hurt..." Nami stated as she stared at her friend's back.

"Because we'll get hurt, Nami, no need to sugarcoat it," I corrected her. "And frankly, that's not her call. We've come this far, and we'll go as far as we need to to see this done."

Zoro nodded in agreement before giving me a sidelong glance. "Vivi won't be happy, you know."

I shook my head with a flat tsk. "If her anger is the price of a thousand thousand lives, then I'm more than willing to pay it."

"Fair enough," Zoro shrugged.

"I suppose..." Nami sighed. "In the end, I guess it's your mess... still, I do have one question."

"Hm?" I glanced at her curiously.

Nami gave me a flat glare as she held up the edge of her coat and displayed a rather... form fitting outfit, if I did say so myself.

"HUBBA HUBBA!" Soundbite whooped eagerly.

"Personally, I think you're more an autumn than... what is that, a winter? But eh, it looks good either way," I grinned cheekily.

Nami snarled darkly as she let her robes drop. "What the hell were you thinking when you all but told Sanji to specifically get these outfits!?"

My grin widened a few molars. "I appreciate Alabasta's rich culture?" THWACK! "Agh, bitch!" I winced and clutched my throbbing arm. "Why are you so annoyed anyways!? You didn't mind that much in the story!"

"And if it was just Sanji being Sanji, I wouldn't mind!" Nami snarled. "But now that you're involved in this, it's a whole different paradigm! Now talk!" She brandished her fist menacingly.

"Alright, alright, geeze!" I held my hands up in surrender. "If you really must know..." I drew myself up and gave her the most solemn look I could manage. "The outfits you and Vivi are wearing? They are directly intertwined with the fate of Alabasta. Should you not wear them, then all is lost."

Nami blinked in surprise before looking down at herself contemplatively. "Well... alright. If you say so."

And with that, she accelerated slightly and got back into the midst of our group.

I held my solemn expression for all of ten seconds before allowing myself to grin like a madman.

"That outfit isn't important at all, is it," Zoro grunted.

"Oh, it is, it is!" I hastily reassured him. "Just..." My grin widened further. "Not for the reasons she thinks."

Zoro and Soundbite chuckled in amusement.

"I don't know why I expected anything less, Cross."

"She gon' keel YOU, boi!"

"Ah, but what a way to go..."

"Gaaaah, it's hoooot!"

We were drawn out of our conversation by Luffy letting out a piteous whine.

"How much longer is it gonna be until we get there?"

"I'm afraid it's going to be a while, Luffy," Vivi stated with a sigh. "All we can do is keep going forwards."

"Take heart, captain!" I reassured Luffy as I jogged up to him and patted him on his shoulder, staring out into the desert. "It's going to be long and hard, but none can deny the truth: we're on the last leg of our journey. At this point, nothing can stop us now."

Luffy was silent for a moment as he contemplated that. As he stared out into the vastness. Stared into the future, stared at the war to come. The struggle that lay before us.

"...but it's still going to be long and hot, huh?"

"As though god were punishing us from on high."

"Awwww..."