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There is No Epic Loot Here, Only Puns (Dungeon)

Delta was a teacher who traded her name away for a chance. Now reincarnated as a dungeon core, Delta strives to survive and thrive without becoming a death trap that kills everything, including human beings, like other dungeons. She filled her dungeons with jokes, friendly monsters that could turn deadly if you decided to be violent, mushrooms, more jokes, funny traps, riddles, and most importantly, puns! Her dungeon is also located near the town of Durance, an ordinary-looking town that is actually filled with retired legends of both the famous and infamous kind. In a broken world that is slowly falling apart, watch as Delta repairs it by creating smiles instead of killing! Original Work’s Synopsis: She became a dungeon core. Everything pointed Delta to murdering her way to success. People were just mana farms, right? No, that was wrong. Delta refused. Then everything became odd. *IMPORTANT NOTE* This is not my work but another author’s. I just found this novel unique, fascinating, and splendid. I had a perpetual smile and often laughed while reading this novel. It needs more recognition, so I decided to edit it for any mistakes and post it here on WebNovel. The author does post on RR and a forum website called Space Battle, so check it out if you’re interested. If you're actually spending time reading this note of mine, then I hope you had an enjoyable time reading the novel. If you really enjoyed the novel and would like to support the author (Not Me!111!1!!!), I’m also gonna include his Patreon and PayPal link. Author's Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=3031332 Author's PayPal: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/ConnerStewart

H3R0Y · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
49 Chs

[4] The Piggy in the Middle

Delta didn't have to wait long for Hob and Gob.

They announced themselves with a screech and an oink as they barrelled into the dungeon.

Delta's mouth dropped open as they carried a rather large pig into the tunnel, the animal squirming and squealing just as loudly as the goblins.

"Mans!" Hob warned. Gob just screamed as the pig bit him.

Fran stood with a sharp look and rushed off towards the entrance, turning the corner in the new tunnel.

Gob threw the pig down, and Delta closed her eyes for the next part but soon felt Mana flow toward her.

It was plump and calm. Delta enjoyed the feeling. This feeling was much better than-

She gagged, and her sight shot open as Hob dropped the dreaded mushrooms all over the dungeon floor. Delta bent over and felt winded as the vile taste of mushrooms overwhelmed her senses.

"Man!" Gob shouted again, and Delta tried to inhale as she watched her Mana number grow.

From a measly six all the way to twenty.

The pig just gave her fifteen Mana in a single pop. The remaining mushrooms pushed past her limit and struggled to reach a number beyond her max.

Twenty-five.

Then, it began to trickle down as the excess Mana seemed to leak away.

That was enough for her new monster if she hurried! Delta stumbled to her feet and to the first bend in her dungeon. She picked a spot close to the wall as the three goblins made warning noises at the person approaching the dungeon entrance.

Delta focused.

"Mushroom Spitter!" She ordered, and she saw her orb pulse once. Then, from the ground, a cap appeared. It grew rapidly until Delta was staring at a mushroom almost as big as a child and firmly anchored in the ground. Then the living fungus wriggled, and the stalk split apart horizontally to reveal a big toothy maw filled with some vicious green liquid. She would later deny having squealed in fright in any way, shape, or form.

It gurgled at the dungeon as it blinked its two beady glowing eyes. It seemed to send some mental 'I live to serve' feeling at her before it focused intently on the corner where her goblins seemed to roar.

Delta ordered them all back, curious to see what her new mushroom could do.

The grey flesh and dark cap made it blend well into the dungeon. It was then that Delta finally noticed that her dungeon was almost pitch black beyond the first turn. Didn't Dungeons have eternal torches or glow bugs?

Did she see in some… UV or night vision? Mana vision?

Mushy, she deemed him, wriggled as the goblins ran past, understanding them as 'Dungeon,' letting them pass, albeit with a sense of annoyance to him.

Delta knew, just knew, if one of them had bumped into it, it would have chomped down with a vengeance. It didn't seem to really like anything other than its damp wall.

"Blasted goblins! Just get back here and give me back my pig!" A man shouted, his voice more angry than afraid. He turned the corner, and Delta blinked as the man held a small… gun?

Delta came closer, nervous, but the man didn't seem to sense her. The 'gun' was a stone device held in two hands, a small red crystal plugged into the handle, and the wide muzzle of the gun had an almost cartoonish iron sight.

Delta goggled at it, trying to understand what she was looking at. The crystal glowed orange, and Delta tried to see inside, but the man moved through her. As the man drew too close, Mushy did what Delta guessed was what Mushy would do in any circumstance.

It lashed forward and took a chunk out of the man's leg. Delta blanched at the sight of the man's wounds, but the man screamed and fired the device in his hands.

The end erupted into a gout of fire that consumed Mushy. The mushroom screeched and then promptly melted.

"Mushy!" Delta screamed, feeling the awareness of the monster fade as it was killed. The man gasped and tried to pull himself up the wall, gun pointed down.

Delta knew logically that the man had every right to defend himself and to get revenge on his pig. It was only fair.

But Delta also felt that a farmer with a boomstick was unfair. Very unfreaking fair.

"Fran, Hob, Gob!" Delta yelled, and the goblins rushed out. She closed her eyes, not enjoying the unfairness of the situation, on her side or the man's.

Mana flowed, but Delta ignored it. This… this was not how she wanted things to go. This wasn't how she wanted things to go at all.

To survive, she needed Mana and DP. To get them, she needed time and resources.

Delta either needed to kill or gather resources. Mushrooms came guilt-free.

She would make the goblins understand… she didn't want to kill anyone who didn't…

This wasn't fair. She shouldn't have to make moral codes for monsters and try to live with the result.

"Goblins… don't steal from the mans again. Just… bring me things from the forest. Things that don't belong to humans..." She begged, and the goblins seemed to shuffle as they listened to the air.

"No want piggies?" Hob asked quietly.

"Not man's piggies." Delta agreed gently. Her Mana had sky-rocketed from eleven to thirty-two due to the farmer's demise. The gun on the ground was also dissolving quickly.

This wasn't a normal world of farmers and knights… that thing reeked of technology.

She created a new Mushy on the same spot. The thing shivered as if still upset at the previous Mushy's death. Delta was sure they were different mushroom monsters. They had different markings on their cap.

The man had been worth twenty-one Mana. More than her max total. With her new Mushy, the result dwindled back down to nineteen.

The gun finished breaking apart, the crystal the last thing to go.

Her Mana shot to 69, and Delta blinked as a little box appeared.

---

Torches have been added to the Construction Menu due to fire element.

Goblin Campfire has been added to the Construction Menu due to fire element.

Flame Bout Grap (Weak) added to Construction Menu due to fire element.

---

Delta wanted to squirm and look, but the Mana was already beginning to dip lower.

She returned to the main core room and fired another hallway tunnel to the north, the earth quickly giving way to the space. Moving to the end, she created a room. It crumbled into an almost perfect shape, but she was still nineteen Mana up.

Delta moved back to her first bend and threw down a pitfall trap. It left her with 14 over, and after a moment's thought, she created another Mushy in her core room, bringing the total Mana to twenty-one.

The last of the Mana held on, and she blinked, not sure why it wasn't fading. Opening the menu, she felt her surprise rise as her max total Mana was now twenty-five.

When… how did it grow? Delta knew she had exactly twenty Mana before she began to spend. She built a hallway as she did before, another Mushy after the second bend in the entrance tunnel, and… a room.

Delta eyed the new room, the deepest part of her dungeon now. It felt like she was less crushed as if her mind had more space to stretch itself.

A room added five more Mana to her maximum pool. That was interesting, a lovely little discovery.

Delta closed her eyes and sent a small prayer for the farmer. His death was helping her, and she needed to ease the bubbling guilt rising, even if the way he charged into a cave after a pair of goblins was Darwin awards-level stupid.

"Thanks…" She added lamely, not particularly religious but still hoping it helped.

She eyed the furthest room as the two goblins left for the forest.

It would be better to have her core there than in the middle of the dunge-

---

Would you like to move your core? Cost 10 DP.

---

Delta stared for a moment and then clicked yes without a word.

One day, she would finish a monologue without having handy notifications to solve her problems. She paid the price, choking as she saw she had 82 DP.

The core rumbled and flashed, the earth altar holding it breaking apart.

The Orb floated gently up the tunnel, and then, with another groan, the earth rose and gripped the core tightly.

Just like that, she had a new core room, with another room to defend her! Delta snorted. Soon, she would be good enough to be called a tutorial dungeon…

With some grumbling, she moved back to the old core room and saw a Mushy was still skulking in the shadows.

Delta hummed.

It'd be a shame to have this whole room dedicated to one Mushy, and there was that… lair thing she could buy.

"Can I move the mushroom?" She asked, and the little box appeared.

---

Moving stationary monsters costs 1 Mana and takes 10 minutes. Would you like to move the Mushroom Spitter?

---

It asked just as she guessed. Delta felt smart and crouched down to stare with some interest as the mushroom glowered, as it was slowly transported into the hallways by what looked like a magic plant pot of all things.

Delta began to flick through the menus after a minute. Magic was cool, but a slowly fading mushroom being carried down the hall was not as great as it seemed.

The things she could outright buy….

---

Mana: 20/25.

Regen: 1 per day.

Construction:

 - Corridor (50 ft): 10 Mana.

 - Room (10L x 15W): 20 Mana.

 - Torches: 1 Mana per torch.

 - Goblin Campfire: 5 Mana.

-------------------------

Monsters:

 - Goblins(Chosen beginner monster): 10 Mana.

 - Mushroom Spitters: 13 Mana.

---------------

Traps:

 - Low-grade pitfall: 5 Mana.

--------------

---

Then there were the things she still needed to purchase with DP.

---

Dungeon points: 72

-------------------

Construction Purchase:

 - Lair: 20 DP (one per level).

 - Next Level - Locked.

 - Boss room: 40 DP (one per level).

Monster Purchase:

 - Common Bat: 5 DP.

 - Common Spider: 5 DP.

Trap Purchase:

 - Sticky Floor Panel: 10 DP.

 - Weak Tripwire: 5 DP.

 - Falling Rock (Weak): 10 DP.

 - Flame Gout trap: 8 DP.

---

Delta saw the evolution menu was unlocked, but she decided to hold off on temptation as the Mushy was finally moved.

She flicked through the menu and tapped 'Lair.' A map opened up in front of her, and the only empty room flashed for confirmation. Shrugging, Delta tapped it, and the surrounding room shifted as the earth rose and the walls bulged slightly. Tiny hay-filled alcoves formed, and a single stone hut, small enough for a dog or a crawling goblin formed.

Delta grinned as she saw the changes she had brought with a single push of a button. The Lair seemed to be a resting spot for humanoid monsters, the alcoves suggesting a place to snooze between battles.

Shrugging, Delta added the fire goblin fire pit, and a box appeared.

---

Would you like to make the Lair into a goblin camp? Bonus healing to Goblins!

---

Delta hit confirm the room changed to have empty racks of meat. The alcoves were replaced with small tribal huts, and a decent-sized fire roared to life in the center, lighting the room up as it crackled with merry purpose. Fran appeared and began to praise her.

Delta waved it off, feeling a blush coming to her ghostly face.

Fran sat down, warming his hands by the fire.

Delta smiled at his delighted face. She opened the menu and browsed through the upgraded menu.

---

Upgrades Menu.

Total DP: 52.

Total Mana: 15

Construction:

 - Upgrade entrance into simple entrance hall: 10 DP or 20 Mana.

 - Upgrade dungeon dirt walls into wood-reinforced dirt walls: 10 DP.

 - Upgrade simple wooden torches into stone sconces: 10 DP.

Traps:

 - Upgrade pitfall into Deep pitfall. (10-foot drop that makes it hard to get out): 15 DP.

Monsters:

 - Goblins: Evolve into Goblin Thug or Goblin Archer or Goblin Apprentice. (5 Mana and 2 DP price per goblin).

 - Mushroom Spitters: Greater Mushroom or Myconid. (10 Mana each).

 - Rare monster evolutions: Fran(Goblin) can evolve into a boss due to "Pig Mount" absorbed. Unable to begin process due to lack of Boss room.

---

Delta turned slowly back to the humming Fran.

Boss… monster?

Delta looked over the construction menu and saw the list did indeed allow for a boss room… she just didn't give it much thought.

In hindsight, it was rather obvious.

But why did Fran need a pig to become a boss?

---

[Insert Dungeon Map Here]

This is not my work but another author’s. I just found this novel unique, fascinating, and splendid. I had a perpetual smile and often laughed while reading this novel. It needs more recognition, so I decided to edit it for any mistakes and post it here on WebNovel. The author does post on RR and a forum website called Space Battle, so check it out if you’re interested. If you're actually spending time reading this note of mine, then I hope you had an enjoyable time reading the novel. If you really enjoyed the novel and would like to support the author (Not Me!111!1!!!), I’m also gonna include his Patreon and PayPal link.

Author's Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=3031332

Author's PayPal: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/ConnerStewart

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