There Is Hope

The question hit Mira like a punch.

Did she know?

In an instant, the memories of her life from another time filled her mind. The hopelessness she felt when the whole school isolated her, when her mother died without having a chance to say goodbye to her, when she realize that her so called best friend was a fake, when her marriage fell apart and there was nothing she could do, when she was standing in that cliff in that rainy night... All of it came back to her.

Does she know the feeling of hopelessness? Of course she knows.

She also had been in that position once, ready to let go and end everything. But she didn't. Holding a razor blade in the bathroom, she was so heart-broken and desperate to be free from the pain that she was ready to cut her own wrists, but then she saw herself in the mirror.

The woman in the mirror looked so pitiful and desperate. Tear-stricken face, her wet hair clinging to her damp bare skin, the woman in the mirror begged to be freed.

Seeing her pitiful reflection, amidst the pain and desperation, Mira felt something new.

Defiance. Anger.

She felt defiant towards her own fate. The world already took too much from her, must she also give her life too? Once she did that, she would become truly a loser who lost everything.

After that, she never tried to take her own life again, until that last moment in the cliff.

"So? Are you really going to kill yourself?" She quietly said, her gentle voice being carried by the gentle wind.

Hannah sensed the difference in Mira's voice. So carefully, she turned around to face Mira, her hands tightly grasping the rooftop railings. One wrong move, and she might fall to her death. They were both faintly aware of the crowd on the ground with someone saying something using a megaphone.

Mira looked into Hannah's eyes.

"Do you think that if you kill yourself, the people who have wronged you will feel regret? That somehow, if you kill yourself, you would be able to have your revenge? Let me tell you this then. You're wrong."

Hannah's hand shook but she didn't say anything. Mira continued.

"Sure, they might feel something when you die, but after a few days, they will forget you. Wouldn't that be infuriating? You died because of them, but after your death you wont be even remembered for too long. They will move on with their life, with no regards of what happened to you. They will think that whatever happened to you is completely unrelated to them."

"What do you know?" Hannah cried.

"Of course I know. I've been there once too so I know how you feel. I know how it feels to be isolated from the rest and be criticized for something I didn't do. But hear me okay? You think that its the end for you, but its not. Just like it wasn't for me."

Mira just realized it, but the words she'd been saying is not only for Hannah, but also for herself. In Hannah, she saw herself from the past. Mira wished that there was also someone who could say the same words to her back then, but she was all alone. A tear fell from her eyes but she wiped it.

Hannah's cold expression started to change. Before she knew it, tears were already streaming down to her face. "It hurts." She sobbed. "It really hurts. They all think in being dramatic, that Im over-acting but it really hurts. I felt like dying everyday."

Depression is no joke. People say that its just depressed people being dramatic, and that if they would just change their mindset, they would no longer be depressed but it doesn't work like that. You cant just stop being depressed because you wanted to. If all those inspirational tips, advices and inspirational books work like magic, there would no longer be depressed people in the world.

Mira knew that from experience so she told Hannah. "I know. I know it hurts and its okay to acknowledge that you're not okay. But you cant run away like this. You mustn't quit like this."

While talking, Mira was taking step by step towards Hannah.

Hannah was sobbing now. She quickly said the words that no one bothered to listen to.

"It wasn't really me. I really didn't do that. Im not the one in the video. But they di-didn't listen to me. Th-they kept pointing on me saying words.. But i really didn't do it. It wasn't really me..."

Seeing Hannah cry her heart out, Mira's heart broke for her. It wasn't even a whole day yet, but Hannah already collapsed from all the criticism and harsh words pointed at her.

"I know. I believe you. Kang Jun thinks that its not you too."

Upon hearing Kang Jun's name, Hannah raised her head.

Mira saw the opportunity. She continued to talk using Kang Jun's name while discreetly taking another step. There were only 3 feet distance between them.

"That's right. When the teacher announced that we're free, Kang Jun and another of my friends went to look for you to comfort you. You see? There are people who cares about you." Mira pressed on.

Hannah cried harder when she heard this.

"So dont do this okay? Even if you feel hopeless today, it doesn't mean that tomorrow would also be hopeless."

Mira took another step and held out her hand.

Hannah stared at Mira's outstretched hand for a minute while crying. Another minute had passed before she moved.

One of her hand let go of the railings to reach Mira's outstretched hand, her body shifting so she could reach.

That's when things went wrong.