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The Rebellious Nun and the Witty Taoist

"The Rebellious Nun and the Witty Taoist" spins a tale of martial arts, mischief, and the occasional fish fry in the world of Jianghu.  Mei Lin, once a spirited nun known for sneaking smokes instead of meditating, finds herself entangled in the intrigues of the Black Moon Sect following her audacious escape from the confines of the White Lotus Temple. Rising as the Scarlet Shadow, the Evil Sect leader's cunning strategist and rumored paramour, she becomes both a figure of awe and consternation for her old friend, Zhang Wei. Meanwhile, Zhang Wei, now a senior Taoist elder tasked with maintaining discipline in the Azure Cloud sect, faces his greatest challenge yet: dealing with Mei Lin, his former partner-in-mischief turned shadowy operative, who is brought in by his sect's overzealous disciples following the death of the Evil Tyrant, Jiang Hei.  Mei Lin's capture has thrust Zhang Wei into a quagmire of sect politics and his own conflicting emotions. Their reunion, a decade in the making, unfolds with dry humor and razor-sharp banter as they skillfully dance around truths buried beneath layers of deception and unspoken yearning. Amidst Jianghu’s descent into chaos under the new leadership of the Black Moon Sect, Mei Lin and Zhang Wei must untangle their intricate history. With new insights emerging that blur Zhang Wei’s understanding of where righteousness ends and wickedness begins, they confront the daunting task of redefining their roles in a world teetering on the edge of moral ambiguity.  With their trademark dry wit and undeniable chemistry, they navigate a shifting landscape where alliances are as fickle as the wind, and where laughter serves as their shield against the perils of honor and ambition.

PirateSasha · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
16 Chs

Flashback: The Stream (1)

The sun hung low in the sky, casting a warm, golden hue over the secluded glade where the forest opened up to reveal a small, bubbling stream. The gentle murmur of the water created a soothing symphony, harmonizing with the rustle of leaves in the soft breeze. Dappled sunlight filtered through the canopy of trees, painting the ground with intricate patterns of light and shadow. This hidden sanctuary, far from the prying eyes of their respective sects, yet not far from either of them had become a cherished meeting place for Zhang Wei and Mei Lin.

Zhang Wei arrived first, his steps cautious and deliberate as he navigated the familiar path. His heart raced with anticipation, a mix of excitement and the ever-present anxiety of being discovered. He scanned the surroundings, his keen eyes ensuring their solitude. Satisfied that he was alone, he allowed himself a moment of relaxation, leaning against a sturdy oak and breathing in the fresh, earthy scent of the forest.

He rolled up his sleeves, picking up a stick, walking towards the stream. He first sharpened the tip, then held it as a spear, using spiritual energy as the bait to catch the fish. The exercise required precision but Zhang Wei made it look effortless.

 

He had caught enough fish and had just started to gut them when a slight rustle announced the arrival of Mei Lin. She moved with the grace of a dancer, her presence as light and ethereal as a whisper. 

Her eyes sparkled with warmth as she caught sight of Zhang Wei, her lips curving into a radiant smile. She executed an exaggerated curtsy, her movements exaggerated and theatrical. "Honorable Scholar Zhang," she said in a mock-serious tone, "I hope your wisdom has not dulled your sense of adventure."

Zhang Wei looked up, caught off guard for a moment before a grin spread across his face. He stood and performed a deep, elaborate bow, sweeping his arm out with a flourish. "Esteemed Priestess Mei," he responded, matching her playful tone, "your mischievous spirit seems to be as vibrant as ever."

They both straightened up, their eyes meeting with a shared understanding that these moments were rare and precious. 

With the teasing formalities dispensed, Mei Lin moved to the stream's edge, the spot where so many of their memories had been forged. With a very unladylike action, Mei Lin removed her veil, throwing it to the side. She sat on a large rock, her legs swinging back and forth as she watched him clean fish with a playful smile.

Mei Lin shielded her face from the sun, leaning slightly forward as if examining him critically. "I heard you were caught napping during meditation. I didn't realize enlightenment could be so exhausting."

Inwardly Zhang Wei cursed his Shidi who made his little blunder the talk of the town that even this little deity from the White Lotus Temple was aware of. But towards Mei Lin, he simply chuckled, shaking his head. "Only because someone kept me up late with tales of her escapades. Your stories are more riveting than any dream."

Mei Lin's eyes sparkled with amusement. "Ah, so it's my fault now? Perhaps I should stop sharing my adventures with you. Then you might actually stay awake during your meditations."

"Perish the thought!" Zhang Wei exclaimed, pretending to be horrified. "Without your stories, my life would be dreadfully dull. Besides, how else would I keep my mind sharp enough to outwit you?"

"Outwit me?" Mei Lin laughed, a musical sound that filled the clearing. "You must be dreaming again, Scholar Zhang. No one outwits a Priestess of my caliber."

Zhang Wei's grin widened. "Oh, is that so? Then perhaps we should have a contest of wits right now. What do you say, Priestess Mei?"

"Very well," Mei Lin said, stepping closer and crossing her arms. "Let's see if your words are as sharp as your fishing skills."

Their playful exchange continued, each teasing the other about their respective sects and duties, their words laced with affection and camaraderie. 

"Tell me, Honorable Scholar, how does one stay awake during those endless lectures on the ancient texts?" Mei Lin asked, her tone light and teasing.

"It's a secret known only to the most dedicated of scholars," Zhang Wei replied with a mock-serious expression. "But I suppose I could share it with you, if you promise to keep it a secret."

Mei Lin leaned in, her eyes wide with feigned curiosity. "I promise. What is the secret?"

Zhang Wei leaned in closer as if to whisper, then suddenly pulled back and winked. "It's simple, really. Just imagine the lecturer in their underwear."

Mei Lin burst into laughter, shaking her head. "You're terrible, Zhang Wei. Truly terrible."

"But it works," Zhang Wei said with a grin. "And it makes the time pass much quicker."

"Well, I'll have to try that during my next ritual," Mei Lin said, still laughing. "Though I doubt the stuffy Sister Gui would make a good sight."

"Probably not," Zhang Wei agreed, thinking of the shriveled plum-like face of Senior Nun Gui. "But I bet it would make for an interesting story."

Mei Lin wasn't any help but she had this bad habit of throwing jabs while watching Zhang Wei work. 

"Are you sure you know what you're doing, Master Fisherman?" Mei Lin teased, her tone light and mischievous. "That fish looks like it might be planning an escape."

Zhang Wei looked up, feigning offense. "I'll have you know, Priestess, that this is a highly refined skill. Only the finest chefs in the land can prepare fish as well as I do."

Mei Lin giggled, her laughter a sweet melody that mingled with the sounds of the forest. "Oh really? Because the last time you tried, I think you nearly set the entire stream on fire. Do you remember?"

"Ah, but that was purely intentional," Zhang Wei retorted with a grin. "I was merely testing your reflexes. And if I recall correctly, you handled the situation with remarkable grace."

"Remarkable grace, you say?" Mei Lin raised an eyebrow, clearly enjoying their playful exchange. "I seem to remember flailing about like a startled deer."

"Details, details," Zhang Wei waved his hand dismissively. "The point is, we're still here, and no streams were permanently harmed in the process."

Mei Lin leaned forward, her eyes sparkling with mock seriousness. "Well, if you're such an expert, maybe you should let me try next time. I promise not to set anything on fire. Probably."

Zhang Wei chuckled as he set the cleaned fish on a flat stone, reaching for his makeshift skewers. "I'd like to see that. But for now, why don't you tell me one of your famous stories while I work my culinary magic?"

"Oh I don't know if you've heard…" Mei Lin began, her eyes sparkling with amusement as she recounted the incident involving the clumsy recruit in her sect. "The poor recruit tripped over her own robes and sent the whole training hall into chaos. It was like watching a comedy unfold before my eyes."

Zhang Wei chuckled, shaking his head in amusement. "Ah, the trials of training novices. At least she didn't mistake a goat for a student. Elder Mun still hasn't lived that one down."

Mei Lin laughed heartily, her laughter mingling with the gentle sounds of the flowing stream. "A goat? How on earth did that happen?"

Zhang Wei leaned back on his elbows, pausing making fish skewers, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Well, you see, it was during the annual sect gathering. Elder Mun was so engrossed in lecturing his disciples that he mistook a wandering goat for one of them. He even tried to give it instructions before realizing his mistake."

Mei Lin doubled over with laughter, clutching her stomach. "Oh, Zhang Wei, that is priceless! You cannot outwit me, but surely miracles like a goat outwitting Elder Mun to be accepted as a disciple still happen."

"Kind of like how I'm outwitting this fish?" Zhang Wei quipped, turning the skewer with a flourish.

"Exactly like that," Mei Lin replied, her tone teasing. "Except the goat wasn't in danger of getting splinters from a fishbone."

"Ah, but splinters can be deadly in the right circumstances," Zhang Wei shot back, grinning. "You never know when a tiny inconvenience might become a great peril."

Finishing readying the skewers, under the dappled shade of overhanging branches, Zhang Wei  set up a small firepit using rocks gathered from the stream's edge. He meticulously arranged twigs and dry leaves, coaxing a small flame to life with deft movements. Mei Lin sat nearby, her chin propped up on her hand as she watched him work with no desire to move or help.

An amused smile playing on her lips. He glanced over at her and raised an eyebrow, knowing her disease was rearing its head again. This heartless woman, not only did she not help, she also had to keep jabs was coming his way.

"Remember, Zhang Wei," Mei Lin chimed in, her voice tinged with playful sarcasm, "fish is meant to be eaten, not turned to ash."

Zhang Wei feigned offense, placing a hand over his heart dramatically. "Your faith in my cooking skills is overwhelming, Mei Lin. Just wait and see."

"Don't forget to season it properly," she remarked, pointing dramatically at the fish as if conducting a cooking lesson.

Zhang Wei chuckled as he sprinkled a pinch of salt over the fish. "Of course, Priestess Mei. A scholar must know the art of seasoning as well as the art of debate." He paused, "Unlike a certain someone who mistook salt for sugar."

Mei Lin laughed, a melodic sound that echoed softly in the serene surroundings. "Ah, but can you handle the heat of the fire, Scholar Zhang? Cooking is not just about knowledge; it requires skill and finesse."

Zhang Wei grinned, turning the skewered fish over the flames with practiced ease. "You doubt my abilities, Priestess Mei? I'll have you know that I am not only a scholar but also a master fish roaster."

Mei Lin leaned back on her elbows, watching him with playful skepticism. "Well, we shall see about that, Zhang Wei."

As the fish sizzled over the fire, the air filled with the tantalizing aroma of cooking fish. Zhang Wei's attention was focused on ensuring the fish cooked evenly, occasionally adjusting the skewers and checking for readiness.

Mei Lin leaned closer, her eyes bright with amusement. "I must admit, Zhang Wei, you handle a fish with far more grace than I expected."

Zhang Wei grinned, a touch of pride in his voice. "I told you, Mei Lin. Never underestimate a scholar's practical skills."

Mei Lin smirked, continuing. "But don't think this means I'm not going to keep an eye on your doctrines."

Zhang Wei smirked. "Oh, please do, Priestess Mei. I'll make sure to provide you with plenty of examples of how flexible those doctrines can be."

Mei Lin laughed. "Flexible, huh? Is that what you call it? More like convenient excuses for breaking the rules."

Zhang Wei raised an eyebrow. "And what about you? Aren't you waiting eagerly to eat fish? Seems like you're bending a few rules yourself."

Mei Lin waved her hand dismissively. "Details, details. I can always claim I'm expanding my culinary knowledge. After all, how can I counsel others if I don't know what they're giving up?"

Zhang Wei chuckled. "Now who's making convenient excuses? You know, Mei Lin, you might have missed your calling as a philosopher."

Mei Lin grinned. "Oh, I can philosophize with the best of them. Here's one: if a scholar falls asleep during meditation and no one is there to see it, did he really fall asleep?"

Zhang Wei wanted to wring his Shidi's neck again. That idiot had done it this time, even the old women in the village did not spread gossip as quickly and efficiently as him. And then there was Mei Lin , who would make sure to bring up him napping during mediation in a hundred different ways, never letting Zhang Wei forget it. Zhang Wei internally swore to never let them both meet, ever.

Zhang Wei laughed, shaking his head. "A classic conundrum. But if you're the one telling the tale, I'm sure the scholar was wide awake and deeply enlightened." Zhang Wei didn't realise it, but his double standards of treating Mei Lin and his Shidi would shock his martial brothers, if only they knew.

Mei Lin shook her head, eyes twinkling. "Enlightened, perhaps, but still prone to napping. Just like a certain someone we both know."

Zhang Wei pretended to be affronted. "Hey, those naps are essential for my intellectual stamina. You wouldn't want me to run out of witty banter, would you?"

Mei Lin leaned back, looking thoughtful. "I suppose not. Who else would keep me entertained with such ridiculous justifications?"

Zhang Wei grinned. "Ridiculous or not, they seem to be working. You're still here, aren't you?"

Mei Lin rolled her eyes, but her smile betrayed her amusement. "For now. But don't think you can get away with everything. I have my limits, you know."

Zhang Wei nodded solemnly. "Of course, Priestess Mei. I wouldn't dream of testing those limits." He paused, grinning, correcting himself, "Not too much."

Mei Lin chuckled. "Good. Because the next time you try to pass off some wild story as a philosophical insight, I might just dunk you in the stream."

Zhang Wei raised his hands in mock surrender. "Point taken. But if you do, make sure to wait until after the meal. I'd hate to lose such a good cook to hypothermia."

Mei Lin shook her head, laughing. "Always thinking ahead, aren't you?"

Zhang Wei winked. "A good scholar must always be prepared."

Zhang Wei’s attempt at cooking fish: a lesson in perseverance and the art of not setting the forest on fire. Caution: Results may vary.

These young fools, really. Sometimes I wonder if I should have named this book “The Escapades of the Fake Taoist and the Fake Nun” instead.

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