Cap16:)

I paused, still halfway through setting up the tent. For some reason, there had been a sack of raw sunflower seeds hidden in the tent bag. I would have attributed it to Ino, being from a family of florists, except that normal people just didn't store sunflower seeds in tent bags.

I looked up at Kakashi-sensei, who gave me a completely innocent look back.

"…Did I say that out loud?"

"Did you say what out loud?"

"Being brilliant and being insane." Still staring at the sunflower seeds, I shrugged and tossed them over to the roadside.

"What about it?"

"Why did you suddenly give me a definition out of the blue? Did I ask for it?"

He turned his head to the side. "No?"

"…So why did you suddenly give me a definition out of the blue?"

"I wasn't aware that you needed a reason to suddenly give people a definition out of the blue."

That was a regular conversation.

…Aaand this is why I don't start arguments with him.

"Want to play a game of chess?"

"No. One, we don't have a board, and two, you cheat." And three, I doubted he even knew all the rules. The last – and only – time I tried, he had tried to get away with turning his rooks upside-down while insisting that a deck of cards was necessary to play the game. In his words, since people in real life rarely followed the rules, it was incentive for him to do the same in board games. Which, I supposed was true enough, but all the same, I didn't think it was possible to suddenly summon a rain of flaming rocks into the middle of a battlefield in real life.

Then again, that sounded exactly like the sort of stupid thing he'd do for shits and giggles.

"One, I do not cheat, and two, flaming rocks are the stupidest and most inefficient way ever to kill someone."

"I didn't say anything about flaming rocks."

"You were thinking it, though."

I frowned. "How'd you know?"

"So you really were thinking about flaming rocks?" He grinned. "I was just guessing, but thanks for confirming it."

I groaned.

"One game, Shikamaru. And I promise not to cheat."

"We don't even have a board."

"We don't need a board to play," he said, smiling. "Pawn to e4."

"Pawn to e5. Didn't you want me to practice the new ninjutsu you taught me?" I asked, shoving the last tent pole into place.

"It's called multitasking, Shikamaru. I know you can play games like this in your sleep," he said, flipping open his book. "Knight to f3."

"Knight to c6," I said, and started summoning rock pikes from the dirt. I was an Earth type, which suited me well, since it was the best element to form shadows with. Ino, on the other hand, was a fire type – surprisingly, or maybe not – and Naruto was a wind type. Kakashi-sensei himself was a lightning type, although he could manipulate any other element except wind.

We verbally sparred back and forth for a few more minutes, until Kakashi-sensei snapped his book shut and jumped down from his branch. "Checkmate."

I frowned. "You cheated."

"Did not."

"Yes you did," I deadpanned, tracing our moves backwards. Your second-to-last move used a knight from f6. That wasn't a knight. That was my rook."

"Oh, did I? Well, too bad. You should have called me out on it the very moment I did it." He started walking around my earth pikes, kicking them to test their strength. They didn't break; I knew they would not. The first time he had taught me this technique a week ago, I could only compact the earth enough to create a crumbly mess. I had practiced it every day since then.

"I would have beaten you if you hadn't done that," I pointed out. "I was one move away from checkmate."

"Well, then, that's a very good reason for me not to fight fair, isn't it?" he asked.

"Like I said: cheater."

"Shinobi," he corrected.

I glared at him. He looked back at me pseudo-innocently, with his one visible eye.

"That only works if you're five," I told him.

"Actually, I was born on a leap year, so technically, I'm six," he retorted.

"No you weren't. You were born on September 15th."

"September 15th on a leap year."

"That's not how it works…oh, never mind. I know better than to get into an argument with you, sensei."

"That wasn't an argument. We were having a friendly conversation."

I declined to answer, and simply kept molding my stone pikes until Ino and Naruto came back and took their share of dealing with our incorrigible teacher. Rock was much more unyielding than shadows, but the principle was the same. Theoretically, with a bit more practice, I could be making walls and domes with the earth, too, from this very same set of hand seals. Of course, there were probably easier and more efficient methods available, just by memorizing a slightly different set of seals, but it was nice, knowing that I could.

The trip to Suna lasted without much incident, other than Kakashi-sensei's regular behavior – which I think was erratic enough that the gods took pity on us and decided to leave the normal problems for later. For once, Kakashi-sensei didn't chide Ino on trying to keep what semblance of her magazine-model behavior she had left. Though she had no time to apply makeup or brush her hair out in the field, she hadthought ahead far enough to bring along sunscreen and face scarves for the rest of us. It didn't change the fact that the harsh climate of Suna was way different from Konoha's milder weather, but at least it made the transition easier.

Our mission was simple on paper – we were to escort a merchant to Tanyu, the capital of Hi no Kuni, guard him for a week while he did his trading, and then escort him back. Not the standard Capture and Interrogation thing that our team was built for, but it was still important that we familiarized ourselves with various mission types anyway. Come to think of it, that was probably why Kakashi-sensei purposefully made all of our D-ranks way more difficult than they should have been.

In reality, though, the general attitude in Suna was just as welcoming as its weather – that is to say, not very. Though it could hardly be attributed solely to the unfriendly nature of the people. After all, since we had arrived at the gate, Kakashi-sensei had done nothing but cause trouble and expect us to clean it up. That had included flirting with the gate guard there in an attempt to get out of paying the entrance fee and almost succeeding until a man that was either her brother or boyfriend came back out and tried to kill him for it, only for the woman to slap him for being rude to a guest, and that had just erupted into a massive brawl.

From the looks of things they were still cleaning up, and one or two people would be facing some demerits after that particular incident.

Kakashi-sensei, on the other hand, had gotten away scot-free. I think he still hadn't paid the entrance fee, either.

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