Flashback

It was a casual day as every day, I was going home after playing with my friends and as I was walking an idea popped in my head, I wanted to surprise my mother (step-mother) so went to the backdoor and sneaked into the house that's when I heard a scream it was more of a moan in pleasure but for a 9-year-old kid like me it sounded like a plead for help from my mother (step-mother) so I rushed to the kitchen, and what I saw was a man embracing my mother ( step-mother) but to a kid, it was a scene where his mother was being violated.

let me tell you this. I was a mother-con, I loved my mother more than my own life, she was like a god to me, even tho she was my stepmother she also loved me. but I didn't know that love was only on the surface inside she despised me more than anything because my mother died while giving birth to me and my stepmother saw me as a curse. and even marrying my dad was only for his wealth. underneath that soft and caring nature, she hid her true self. she was a fucking whore. that I understand now but back then I cared for her like nothing else.

I couldn't think of anything, I wasn't panicking but I was rather calm and only one thing came to my mind "kill that man" I went to my dad's closet picked up his gun and rushed back to the kitchen, and entered through the door and told mother to get away.

"mother get away" shiva shouted.

"honey this isn't what it loo-"

before my mother could finish what she was saying I shot the man dead with three bullets in his chest. watching the horrifying scene she fell to her knee and screamed and her scream attracted the attention of all the neighbors.

everyone gathered around the scene of the murder, one of them called the cops, and soon after cops came and detained me who had a gun in his hands, and my mother for investigation while they were taking us to the police station my mother was mumbling something.

"he killed him, he killed him, he killed him" mumbled the mother.

after we reached the station we were investigated and my mother testified that the man was there asking her for help with some advice and I suddenly came out of nowhere and killed him.

what a bitch. if my father was there at that time maybe my fate would have been different. and I wouldn't have had to spend my days in this prison cell when I hear my mother say that she was just helping him with some advice I just gave up. I mean what could have I said anyway, I didn't know what was going to happen to my father after this incident but one thing I was sure of, was that I was going to be hanged to death. because that's the sentence for murder in every country.

while watching my mother lie, my body went numb and there was a pain rising in my chest. it felt like someone was piercing my heart with thousands of needles. and all my feelings started to fade away one by one love, compassion, sadness, Fear, amusement, anxiety, joy, empathic pain, and excitement. the only thing that remained in my heart was immense hatred.

soon the day of my verdict came and to my surprise, I was only sentenced to 9 years of jail. because I was underage my punishment was light and I was given a second chance to start over after turning 18.

time was slow in prison it was boring and I had nothing to do, after a year or so our jailer changed, and new our jailer was a maniac, she was crazy, and she treated other criminals like dirt, but it was different for me even tho I was a murderer, in her eyes, I was just a cute little boy. she adored me.

"hey boy, do you know how to read and write," said the jailer

"yes, I do," said shiva in a cold voice.

"well aren't you a smart one reading and writing at your age, impressive"

"well I am a born genius"

the jailer laughed at my statement.

"hahahahahahahah, yes you are"

"ill give you books to read, to cure your boredom. how bout it, kid"

"sure, ill at least have something to distract myself with."

few days passed and she gave me some books.

damn, I knew she was crazy, but to this point. every book is about brainwashing, human analysis, how to break people mentally, and other mental issues. every book was related to the brain, human phycology, and human behavior.

it wasn't as boring as I had thought it would be, actually, it was quite interesting and slowly I became obsessed with those kinds of books.

my jail mates always told me stories about their experiences in the outside world and how the outside world was cruel and unforgiving.

time passed by and no one came to visit me in the jail. and finally the day I get out of this hell hole arrived.