32. We Aren't All Alone In The Dark

Yet once we face our fears and turn to each other for help, night time isn't so scary because we realize we aren't all alone in the dark.

-Meredith Grey

"Dr. Moore." She raised her head from where she was finishing off a chart and saw Tom smiling at her jokingly. "How was your visit?"

"It was good," the brunette replied, flushing at the thought of how much although fantastic, inappropriate sex they had had during her stay. It was her second day back after working the overnight shift for the N.I.C.U. "How were your days off?"

"Eh." he shrugged with a smile. "Spent time with Ella and the others. Whose service you on?"

"Ortho; Dr. Olivier. You're on plastics?"

"Yep. With Austen," he groaned. "I so wanted peds this week." He sighed and she gave him a sympathetic smile. "Well, we better go before Bakely's on our ass." Agreeing, she began stacking the charts how the ortho attending liked it and began walking to the first room on the list. When she approached, she heard an angry conversation not in English but in another language she didn't understand.

"Dr. Moore, you're early." She looked forward and saw the man she was waiting for. Dr. Olivier was a doctor around fifty years with salt-and-pepper hair and keen blue eyes. His accent always set him apart from the other staff. That fantastic French accent. "Are they arguing again?" he asked with a sigh.

"Excuse me?" She followed him in and it broke the arguing. In the bed was a man, an angry expression upon his face that was echoed in the standing man's. Offering the chart to the attending, she tried to figure out their relationship as Dr. Olivier turned to her expectantly. "Carlos Sanchez, sixty-four, in for a hip and knee replacement after complaining of severe pain on his left leg." She reported, having memorized all of them to impress the attending. Dr. Olivier nodded, opening the binder.

"Fernando, you may stay if you wish to."

"I was just leaving," the standing man snapped, shoving past the doctors and storming out of the room. Carlos Sanchez stared after him, a tinge of sadness in his gaze.

"Mr. Sanchez," Emily prompted softly, causing the man to look at him. Dr. Olivier's lips quirked downwards and she couldn't help but stare out the door where his brother no longer stood. "Do you have any other family we could call?" she asked, returning to the patient. Mr. Sanchez shook his head and a mask of sympathy schooled her features. Something about 'Fernando' felt off to her but she ignored it as Dr. Olivier told her to prep him for surgery.

.

Tom picked up a fry from her tray and she scrunched up her nose at him, scowling. "I'm not blind."

"But you're nice," he retorted as Ella sat down beside the brunet. "Hey, Els," he greeted warmly, pecking the woman on the mouth before returning to his own lunch. "Where's Davin? Aren't you on that-"

"Penis case?" the blonde supplied, stabbing her lettuce with her fork. Emily snorted, picking up an apple slice. "He's running labs but I seriously need to get away from the testosterone. You're my only hope, Em!" she said dramatically, leaning towards the brunette and away from her boyfriend who reeled back in mock-offense.

"I'm sure Tom can ward off the hormones. He's very feminine," the brunette snorted, chuckling. Soon, another man came over to the table, settling in the chair between Tom and Emily. "Hey, Matt."

"Hi." He flushed a trademark red at her greeting. "How's your day going?" Cracking open the cup of yogurt, she shrugged. "Oh." He sounded slightly disappointed as Ella made a crack remark, making his skin redden even more.

"Leave him alone, Ella," Emily chastised playfully and the blond man flashed her a grateful glance. "Hey." She leaned forward, remembering that the blonde had been on ortho the week before. "You know about Mr. Sanchez?"

"The man needing a hip replacement?" She nodded, "Yeah, I admitted him on my last day. Olivier wanted to take a look at it; why?"

"His brother-"

"Fernando?" all of them chorused and she blinked repeatedly.

"We all know him," Matthew added, a strange look on his face.

"What?"

"He's a recovering addict. We all treated him at least once," Tom explained, "Relapsed too many times to count. It's almost ritual." She frowned thoughtfully. Ella made a face and she turned around to see a ginger man, his blue eyes glimmering at them. "Welcome to the cult."

"Glad to be here," Davin retorted, settling his tray down. "Labs should be up in an hour, they'll page you," he informed Ella who grumbled with a roll of her eyes. "You see a penis often enough. More than enough," he corrected with a pointed look at Tom. The brunet smirked as Davin settled down beside Matthew. "How's the newbie doing?"

"Newbie's doing fine," Matthew said, chewing on his sandwich.

"Not you, Matt."

"I wasn't talking about me." Emily smiled at the banter, reminiscent of her friends back in Seattle. Matthew huffed, green eyes narrowed at his best friend who shrugged.

"Newbie's doing fine," she echoed Matthew. "Don't have to be so tart all the time," she sniffed in a faux-haughty manner as Ella snorted, removing the water bottle from her lips as she began rubbing the bridge of her nose.

"Water went up my nose," she said with a cough, swallowing. Tom immediately began rubbing his girlfriend's back, unsure of what to do. Emily sent an apologetic look her way as Davin rolled his eyes.

"Yes I do. It's my defining characteristic," the ginger replied as her pager went off. Emily looked at the device near her hip to see Dr. Olivier paging her.

"I've gotta go. Don't die," she said with a pointed finger to Ella who was calming down. Matthew chuckled quietly as she picked up her tray. "It'd be a humiliating way to go."

.

"What happened?"

"We've got a situation," the French surgeon sighed, "walk with me." They began striding down the hall quickly, brushing past nurses and orderlies. They went into an elevator as finally, the blue-eyed man turning to his student. "It appears Fernando has gotten into trouble."

"Fernando," she repeated. "Mr. Sanchez's brother. What happened?" Grabbing a trauma gown, he passed her one before snapping on a pair of latex gloves. She shoved her arms through it hastily before barely managing to grab a pair of gloves as well as she followed after the attending. He ran into the E.R., diving into the bustling crowd and into trauma room three. Emily followed after him, eyes widening at the sight on the table. The man on the table didn't even look at all like the man earlier that morning.

Skin was burned away on his neck, face and chest. They all oozed blood as E.R. staff bustled around the man, hooking him up to monitors. Coming closer, she raked her gaze over the body, freezing when she spotted the legs. They were obviously amputated by a trained doctor and would heal for a prosthetic easily.

"Driving while high. Slammed right into another car with a kid in it," a man explained with disgust and she looked over her shoulder to see her brother wheeling in a small girl, crying for her dad. Feeling any sympathy evaporate into the air, she read the x-rays taken on the screen. Clavicle fracture and damage to the left radius and ulna. His fingers have extensive damage. I'd fix them by ex vivo, she mused, trying not to touch the scarred skin. Finally, another doctor came into the room, face wet with sweat.

"The mom's in critical condition. We need an ortho consult on her," Taylor reported to Olivier who nodded. "Somehow, this bastard didn't receive any spinal damage. He just lost his legs." So that's who did it. At Emily's confused look, he answered, "I was there on the scene. He was trapped between the cars."

"Can you handle the bone repairs, Moore?" Dr. Olivier asked. Momentarily stunned, she blinked. It would be the first time she operated without any assistance from the attending. It was a pause before she found her voice and when she blinked again, he was gone. Taylor had answered for her as they raised the rails.

"Let's get him to the O.R. people!" the trauma surgeon yelled and she kicked open the door, pulling along the bed. Holding the elevator, she waited until they were all in before taking out the scrub cap she kept in her back pocket. Tying her hair up, she glanced at Taylor. His blond hair was tucked underneath his own scrub cap - one with x-ray pictures of broken bones on a black background, tiny white inscriptions explaining what each picture was. "Ready for this?"

"Hopefully." With a weak smile, she held onto the rails tighter as the elevator doors opened. Swallowing, she surged onward.

.

When Emily sat down in the chair normally Dr. Olivier sat, aligned with Fernando Sanchez's body, she felt awkward. The other surgeons, older residents and attendings, seemed to be watching her like hawks but the calm presence of Taylor took the edge off.

"Okay. Scalpel." The blade was pressed firmly into her hand and she opened up the arm to see the mess of bones. Glancing at the other arm, she tried to estimate in her head how long it'd take. She had to align the shards of bone so they repaired properly and even then, the risk of infection was high.

She could do this. That's why she was here. To learn to take the lead. She had seen Dr. Olivier do this before. She could do this. I can do this. I can do this. I can do this. The surgery began.

Taylor's constant friendly talk helped ease the passing of time as she informed them that she was going to expose his clavicle. As she did so, somebody bumped into her and the body jostled. Sending a glare to the person who bumped into her, some arrogant third-year, she began to scour for damage. The monitors began to beep and she raked her gaze up to watch his pressure drop before her eyes.

"What the hell?" She dug her fingers in, following the line of the bone until it touched something pulsating, warm. "Someone page cardio."

"What happened?" Taylor asked, raising his hands to scoot over. Across from Emily, he grabbed suction and tried to clear the flooding field as she asked for a clamp.

"The clavicle punctured the heart." Tools were wordlessly placed into her hands and she tried to fix the hole, unable to see. "I need better visualisation."

"Lap pads, come on." The blond stuffed it into the cavity as she heard the door swoosh open.

"What happened?"

"Clavicle punctured the heart. We need to remove it before he bleeds out." The cardio attending nodded, taking Taylor's place to see where she was at. "What do I do?"

"Okay. You're going to listen to me step-by-step. One mistake, this patient is dead. Got it?" She nodded, not taking her eyes off the heart as it continued to pump blood. With every pulse, more blood gushed out. The beeping rung in her ears and she could barely hear the cardio attending's instructions. Still, her hands operated on their own as they carefully removed the bone fragment, stitching the hole closed. Vitals stabilized.

She straightened up and sighed, the tension leaving her body.

When she walked out of that surgery six hours later, the patient alive and stable, she never saw that resident again.

.

As soon as she was out of surgery, she saw Dr. Olivier coming out of another. He ripped off his scrub cap, revealing his frustrated scowl. "Did he live?" he asked pointedly and she nodded. "Fuck."

"I'm assuming the mom didn't," she said and he was quiet. "What now?"

"Now, we tell Carlos what his bastard of a brother did." Nodding grimly, she followed her mentor into the elevator and up to the ortho wing where Carlos Sanchez was being prepared for surgery. Before he went in, Dr. Olivier looked over at her, blue eyes sharp. She stared steadily back before looking away.

"You're an amazing surgeon," he told her grudgingly and she looked up, startled. She didn't think so. "I was paged when the clavicle punctured the aorta." Really? I didn't hear it. She thought dazedly as he offered a small smile.

"Sir?"

"You had it. You're good under pressure. You think quick and you think ahead." She didn't know where he was going with this. "You flew solo today, even when things did not go as planned. And I'm… proud." He nodded once, resuming his hard front and going into the room. Sighing, she rested her head against the wall and closed her eyes. It was so worth it being here.

.

Time passed and she wondered if it she were living in a different world. Seattle seemed like years away and she felt every part of her ache. Everything was so deep-down-to-her-bones tired.

"I miss you. I miss you so much because I am horny and alone and I hate you. You're my best friend and normally I'd have things to talk about with you, and I do. But it's so much easier when I can see you."

"Hey, Emily. We have to scrub in." She turned off her phone and tried to stop the aching in her heart as she turned on the sink. Tom came in beside her. He tied on his mask, stepping on the pedal to turn on the sink. "Who was that?"

"Mark." He hummed with an easy smile. "I miss him."

"I don't think it can be easy, being away from the one you love," Tom said and she smiled. Beginning to scrub in, she glanced at the brunet. "Wanna go out for drinks later with the gang?"

"I don't want to ruin the fun," she said and he snorted.

"You won't. You're one of us." At this, Emily felt the smile dig hard into her cheeks. "Come for drinks after work. I'm not taking no for an answer," he warned, raising his hands and drying them with a towel. Heading into the O.R., he winked at her through the glass and she chuckled. A warmth spread down to her toes as she turned off the sink, walking into the O.R. Inside, Noah and Dr. Olivier were already preparing for surgery. Tom smiled at her from behind his mask and she grinned, knowing.

"Drinks later," he whispered, leaning over the kid and she snickered, drawing back. Noah sent them an amused look before holding out a hand.

"Ten blade."

.

"You know what, maybe I could get used to this," Mark said and she groaned quietly, squeezing her eyes tighter. "Remember this? Before I moved to Seattle? I would stay on the phone all night just to hear you sleep."

"Which is kinda creepy now that you say it like that," she mumbled and he lowered his voice when she yawned. Tom was sleeping on the top bunk in the on-call room after a midnight trauma case resulting in an unexpected surgery after their thirty-six hour shift. Letting go of her phone, she placed it on the bed and turned so her mouth was near the speaker.

"Shut up. It was very romantic."

'You were in love with Addison back then," she sang and he groaned. "But I agree. Very romantic."

"Yeah, so when Derek filled the whole bedroom with rose petals and a huge stuffed bear and candles, is that romantic?"

"Why would he do that?"

"He's planning to propose to Grey." Her eye shot open and she barely contained her voice as she tried to get her mouth to work. Sitting up, she grasped her phone and managed to ramble, stringing a few words into an incoherent sentence before saying one that was just understandable.

"He is? That's fantastic!"

"Except I wasn't supposed to tell you so lie back down because I know you're sitting up. You need to sleep." Lying back down with a pout, she put her phone next to her mouth once more. "Would you like that kind of thing? Rose petals, and bouquets…"

He trailed off and she prompted, "And?"

"And a proposal. Eventually. Not now," he rambled and she chuckled quietly. "We just got together, and all."

"Mark, I want your proposal and the rose petals and the bouquets," she murmured. "I want everything with you. "

"When do you think your next visit will be?" he asked and she tried to run her schedule through her head. Flopping onto her stomach, she smirked. She had a perfect slot starting in a few hours and it lasted an entire seven days, if she skipped the two sim days she had booked earlier. So she had some breathing room if she wanted to return later than what was booked. Was it worth it?

Obviously. She could sneak down again. The thought made her more awake than she had been in hours.

"Next week, maybe?" she lied. "Maybe the week after. I have to study up on these surgeries and I wanna catch up on my sim time. You know they have these big labs that simulate actual cases. It's amazing." He laughed over the other end.

"Yes, I know." He waited for a response and when only soft breathing replied, he sighed. "Goodnight, jailbait." There was no response yet he didn't hang up. He just wanted to hear her and pretend she was still with him.

.

Throwing together a quick duffel bag full of clothes, she told her brother where she was going, kissed her nephews goodbye and hugged her sister-in-law. "See you. Text you when I land safe," she promised and boarded the first plane to Seattle. Landing six hours later, she felt excitement spark in her veins as she told the taxi to drive to Mark's apartment. Letting herself in using the spare key, she dumped her duffel bag and immediately felt her stomach grumble in protest. There was a faint smell of Chinese takeout? Something of the sort, and Emily hadn't eaten since she'd gotten on the plane.

Still, she didn't crave Chinese as much as she craved a burger. Taking a quick shower and brushing her teeth, she changed into a pair of clean clothes and tossed her hair up into a ponytail before heading out. Descending down the steps, she exited the building and walked the short way to Joe's down the street.

"Joe, what can I do for a burg - Oh." Stopping short, she felt herself burn up as the people in the bar turned to look at her. "Hi. Addison? Hey!" Another man walked up and she felt her smile grow. "Derek!"

"Emily - I haven't even seen you around." The redhead stood up and they embraced awkwardly. "Are you - are you looking for Mark?"

"Is he around?" she asked, confused. "I just got off a plane so I - I didn't know he was here?" Addison pulled back and Emily smiled slightly. "I work at Mass Gen now."

"Yeah. Her brother invited her to work in Boston," Derek supplied and Addison arched her eyebrows. Derek grasped her arm, an easy smile on his face. "Yeah. She's a big shot. Oh, this is Naomi and Sam, old friends." The two at the bar waved their hands. "This is Emily Moore."

"You're Noah's sister?" the man, Sam, exclaimed and Emily narrowed her eyes, heading for the bar as Joe leaned forward.

"Burger?"

"Yes, please," she sighed, sitting on a stool. Leaning forward, she fiddled with the basket that held bar nuts as Addison and Derek sat at a table nearby.

"So you're Noah Moore's little sister?"

"Every time. It's a head turner, every time," Emily sighed as a burger was placed before her, hot and fresh and smelling absolutely scrumptious. Squirting ketchup over her fries, she reached for the pepper when someone tugged her off the stool. Yelping, she grasped the arms and felt the familiar leather smooth under her palms. She knew only one man who wore a black leather jacket and the smell of aftershave that accompanied this new person made her sure. "Mark! Let me down!"

She was spun around and was crushed in a hug. Her arms looped around his neck and one hand buried in his hair, tugging him down. Their lips met deeply and her eyes closed as he pushed her back until she was leaning against the bar counter. One hand cupped her face as he pulled back to breathe.

"I missed you," she murmured and he kissed her again, softer this time. The ground solidified under their feet and he laughed shakily.

"And you lied to me. I wasn't expecting you," he whispered, raking his fingers over her scalp. "I would have prepared something. Looked better. You know, bouquets and teddy bears and-"

"If you proposed to me now, I would say yes" she sang teasingly and he groaned, forehead against hers. "You can get me bouquets and teddy bears and a ring later," she added quietly, wide smile fading to a softer one. Her cheeks ached and the comfort flooded her veins. His arms were her blanket of security.

"Wait, what?" Sam made them turn away from each other to see the other four still in the room. "Since when did Mark have a functional relationship?"

"I'm coming to grips with it myself," Derek said as his pager blared. "Damn. Addie, we have to go. It's Jen." Emily sent a confused look at Mark who shook his head. Not now.

"I'm still hungry," she reminded when the two surgeons left. Mark chuckled, sitting next to her at the bar as she dug into her burger. Leaning on his arm, he stared at her eating and she eyed him. "Do I have something on my face?" He reached to brush back drying wispy hair from her face. His fingers curled against her face as Sam and Naomi, on the other side of Emily, whispered to each other.

"No." His blue eyes glowed softly and she leaned over to kiss him. "I've missed you." She smiled against his lips, kissing him again.

"I've missed you, too."

.

Walking up to the main nurse's station near the staircase, Emily pulled her hair out from under her hoodie and fidgeted with her phone. Lexie passed by, engrossed in her chart, and Emily smiled in greeting when the younger surgeon glanced up to make sure she didn't bump into anyone.

"Hey, Emily," she said before continuing on. Emily turned to try and find Mark when he appeared before her, coffee cups in his hands. Extending one to her, she smiled. Behind him, she saw Addison's and Callie's offended expressions and then frowned playfully.

"Hi. Weird seeing you here," she joked and he sighed helplessly, beaming down at her. There was a prominent red mark along her neck and he kissed that spot as she sipped her coffee, rolling her eyes.

"It's impressive that you can even walk after the last two days." Wrinkling her nose, she lowered her voice in her response.

"Well, it's tradition where we christen everything," she said and he chuckled, kissing her forehead. Looping an arm around his neck, she pecked his lips thrice before pulling back and sipping her coffee. "And we better finish before my flight tonight."

"You have work tomorrow?"

"I don't have work at all this week. I have sim time and it's like a study week to prepare for a spinal osteomyelitis surgery." He arched an eyebrow in surprise.

"I've done a few in my time. I could be your study buddy."

She laughed and pecked his cheek, pulling away. "Sounds like a great plan. Tonight, then?" Kissing her mouth, he nodded.

"It's a date."

.

"Alex!" she called and he turned to her, face lighting up with pleasant surprise.

"Em! Hey." He engulfed her in a hug and she smiled into his neck, squeezing tight. "You've been busy."

"Busting my ass," she agreed as they began walking to the elevators. They entered and the smile never left her face. "How's life here?"

"Eh. Whatever." Rolling her eyes playfully, she stepped onto the elevator with Alex and jabbed the button for the floor with the cafeteria. "Wanna catch lunch with Mer and Iz?"

"Yeah. Sure." The doors opened and she walked the path she'd walked a hundred times, spotting the long line and two blondes sitting at a table. With a skip in her step, she headed over and surprised them with hugs before sitting down. It was just like weeks ago when she was stealing fries from Meredith's plate or sharing a drink with Izzie. Except it was very different.

She could see it in their eyes. There was something different. There were secrets that they hid. And Emily wondered what they were, and why they needed to be hidden between family.

.

Mark approached Derek on the catwalk, scratching his head and pulling his ear. Emily always said that's what he did when he was nervous. Shoving his hands in his pockets, he took a deep breath and stood an appropriate distance away.

"I need your help. To plan something 'cause I want to find a way to propose. And I know it's only been a few months but I want to plan ahead because I know she's it and I want her, you know? She's the first person I look for in a room, which, to be honest, sounds disgusting and cliché." Derek was quiet for a moment, blue eyes a storm as they gazed over the hospital. Those words, Rob Harmon's words echoed in his head.

"You killed her. You're a murderer. A murderer. Where's my wife? I want my wife. I want my wife…"

"And the first thought every morning, before I even realize I'm awake, is 'Where is she?' you know? You ever feel that with Meredith or is that just me being codependent?"

Derek's eyes closed. The volcano within him erupted and he pushed off the rail, staring at the surgeon before him. As the magma stuck to his insides, heat coiling in his gut, he reeled back a fist and swung. Mark cradled his cheek, turning at the force and walking back towards his friend.

"I didn't deserve that! What was that for?"

Derek answered with another punch.

.

Emily looked up when she heard the sound of grunting and fighting.

No. No way.

Other staff were looking up, curious and confused as she ran through the halls. Exclaiming 'excuse me's and 'pardon's she took the stairs two at a time and landed on the floor of the catwalk. Already, a crowd was forming and she clenched her jaw. She could hear the sounds of a struggle, the sound of fist meeting cheek and she tried to peer over the taller shoulders of staff.

Pushing through the crowd, she didn't bother with pleasantries as the scene was revealed before her. Mark beating the shit out of Derek as Hunt stormed up to him and began to pull her boyfriend off his best friend. Running forward, she ran to Hunt as he wrenched him away from Derek. Meredith ran past her, taking Derek and walking away as Mark collapsed to a knee.

"Hey, hey." Blood dripped from his split lip which he wiped away. Staring after Derek, she spotted Mark's shoe scattered carelessly across the tile of the catwalk. Alex kicked it towards her and she blinked gratefully to him as he went to go to Addison behind her. Mark sat down and she helped him put on his shoe. Groaning, he pushed himself up before checking his nose to see if it was bleeding. He sniffed painfully, face scrunching up.

He leaned against the rail and Hunt patted him on the back as she scanned his injuries. His hand looked battered. Nothing too serious, she hoped, regarding the hand. Mark Sloan wasn't Mark Sloan without surgery. A cut sliced near his eyebrow, bruises and cuts smattered across his face. One especially violently red colored his split lip.

She wrapped an arm around his abdomen, helping him limp away to an exam room. Callie spotted them and followed them, a flurry of questions pelting them as she opened the door and ordered him to sit down.

"What happened?" asked the ortho resident.

"He got into a fight."

"Why?"

Emily didn't have an answer for that. "What did you do?" she whispered instead as he sunk into his seat, groaning. She aided him in taking off his lab coat while Callie got an ice pack and bandages. "I wanted you to stay out of trouble." Emily went to a drawer and took out a brace, taking off the ice pack. "Thanks, Callie. We're good here."

"Sorry I couldn't keep him out of trouble." Emily shrugged half-heartedly.

"Next time." Callie smiled and left them alone as Emily ripped off the straps, sliding it onto his injured arm. His knuckles were already turning purplish, skin split.

"What did you do?" asked Emily again as she velcroed it tight. Quickly determining it as not broken but swollen and perhaps sprained, she knew he'd have to stay off for a few days. She placed the ice pack on his knuckles, taking his other hand and making sure he held it in place. He winced and she told him to stay still.

"I was talking about man stuff," he said and she narrowed his eyes. "He threw the first punch." Cleaning out the blood, she pecked his forehead when he winced every time she swabbed out blood. As she went for the butterfly strips, he pulled his head back. She rolled her eyes, glowering at him. "I can do it."

"No, you can't. Your hand is injured and I know how to make sure that you'll come out looking even better." He smirked but it disappeared when it pulled on his lip. Pulling his head towards her again, she taped his cuts shut before placing an extra patch over the three butterfly strips. The bruise on his cheek was blooming red and white and she sighed. "I love you."

"Good." She smiled wistfully, tilting his chin up and kissing the corner of his mouth. "Sorry."

"Don't apologize to me. Apologize to Derek."

"What? He threw the first punch!" She gave him a flat expression and he sighed. "I love you, too." She ran a hand through his hair and his blue eyes turned up to her as she stepped between his legs. His chin rested on her chest, eyes wide and round and she smiled helplessly. He was like a lost puppy and her heart was so full for him.

"I'm going to take you home, and you're going to rest that hand. If not for the fact that if you don't, it could cause permanent damage and potentially ruin your hand, then for me." He nodded, head stretching up and she ran her fingers down his face to his neck. "Promise?"

He kissed her slowly and her eyes closed as he whispered, "Promise."

.

Emily frowned dolefully as she hitched her duffel bag higher up on her shoulder. Three extra days she had stayed and now she had to go back if she wanted to catch up on her sim time. With her notes in hand, she tried to focus on the words before her to study for the surgery but she found it difficult when she was leaving home.

"Hey, jailbait."

Looking up, she reached out a hand and smiled immediately upon seeing her boyfriend. As soon as her fingers wrapped around his hand, he flinched away.

"Hand!" His leg even rose from the strength of his reaction and she laughed despite herself.

"Sorry!"

He blew air through his mouth, shaking out his hand gingerly and she placed a feather soft kiss on his tender knuckles, grasping his wrists firmly. Mark's soft eyes landed on hers and he sighed.

"You've got to go."

"I've got to go," she affirmed and he sighed heavily, head drooping. "Worst time, too. Derek's being filed a lawsuit and your hand…"

"And Callie and her lesbian problems which I now have to deal with alone," he added. She frowned half-heartedly at how he refused to deal with how his best friend was suffering. "It's okay. Everything will work out."

"Whatever you say." She adjusted her duffel bag and his eyes flickered down to where she fiddled with the string of the YSL coat. "I probably won't be able to get out for a while. You'll call me, right?"

"I will."

"Goodbye kiss?" she asked weakly and he nodded, pressing their foreheads together. Sharing one, two, four, six kisses, she pulled away and held his uninjured hand. "Talk to Callie. And Derek. Please talk to Derek."

He didn't answer.

"Mark, I'm asking for anything. A nod, a response. He is your best friend." When it was clear he wouldn't say anything, react at all besides look at her, she gave up and sighed in defeat. Pulling her hand away, she began to turn away.

"Em, wait-"

"I'll call when I land."

.

"Em, hey,"

"Noah, what's up?" she asked with a tired smile. Ella waved at her excitedly from the entrance of the hospital. Emily sent her a smile that said 'wait' and turned to her brother.

"Em, we're going for drinks!" Davin exclaimed as he walked past with Matthew.

"I know, just wait!" she replied as Noah let out his own amused greetings. "What's up?"

"I was gonna ask you to babysit the boys." He said sheepishly and she rolled her eyes with a groan. "Seriously, I didn't expect you to have plans."

"Because I have no friends?" she asked sarcastically and he nodded. Pushing his shoulder playfully, the brunette acquiesced. "I'll be home by whatever. What time do you need me by?" He informed that it was by ten. "That's five hours away," she complained playfully.

"It's still enough time for dinner," he soothed, patting her head.

She pouted. "Where are you going anyway? You're going with Theresa right?"

He flushed, nudging her towards the entrance where all her friends were talking excitedly about their day. Getting the idea, she laughed and continued onward towards her friends. They greeted her as they walked towards the bar near the hospital. As they talked and laughed, she couldn't help but feel out of place because of what lingered in her mind. She counted how many missed calls from Mark dotted her phone history, not because she was ignoring him but because of what she was doing.

Tom frowned at her when she fell behind. The brunet asked silently with his eyes for her to explain.

"Stuff happened in Seattle," she said quietly and he wrapped her in a quick side hug.

"You and the mister doing okay?"

"Fine. It's not him." He nodded and his arm fell away. He tugged her ahead to catch up with their friends but she couldn't bring herself to smile.

.

"Please, call Derek. He's outside, out in the wilderness and out in the cold. Just… call. Ask Noah too, if that'll help. We need him back in civilization. Thanks, Em. Really."

Emily ended Meredith's voicemail, dialing a number she hadn't dialed in a long while.

"Derek, I get up in the morning and I worry. I wonder who's taking care of you in the woods. I know Jen died. I know you fought Mark to take out his anger and he didn't know. But you are supposed to be Derek Shepherd. And Derek Shepherd doesn't quit. So please, call Meredith. Or, call me back. I need to know you're okay. Bye."

A/N: Edited - October 13, 2018

Next: There are things distance does to people.