Now I wouldn't say I'm the biggest Pokémon fan on the planet but I did play every game till Sun and Moon, I also watched the anime till Ash somehow lost with that busted Greninja of his. There are certainly worse worlds for me to end up in randomly after a night out.
Now you might be wondering why am I not freaking out? Well it's pretty simple, I can't be asked to give enough of a fuck at this point.
"Oi you orange otter, you want some berries?" I asked the Buizel that seemed like a deer caught in some headlights.
"Bui Bui" it seemed to motion to throw over the berries, which I did without caring much.
It seemed to enjoy the berries plenty enough to drop its guard completely and waltz right up to me, the otter is either innocent or retarded and I can't tell which yet.
"Bui Bui Buizel" the now decidedly retarded otter started flexing in front me as though it seemed to promise protecting me for my offerings. I rolled my eyes at its antics and looked around the lake.
The lake seemed to be a safe haven for the smaller Pokémon, I noticed multiple Lotads, Marils and Goldeen playing around in the water rather peacefully. That was until 3 Poliwags decided to crash the party and start slapping the living shit out of anything they saw. All the Pokémon of the lake started crying out towards Buizel, it seemed it was the protector of the lake.
Buizel seemed absolutely outraged as it saw this and started blasting water guns at all three of them, though they didn't seem to give two shit about the water guns. They instead sent their own water guns right back at Buizel sending him flying into a tree behind us, thank god they ignored me, nope never mind.
They were sending water guns right at me now and I was dodging like it was dodge ball class all over again, I am not about to get caught lacking with dodging ever again. Not after how Brad snipped my balls into oblivion that day...
The Poliwags got annoyed with me dodging everything they sent my way and so decide to go back to abusing the other Pokémon of the lake, classic bully mentality right there, guess Pokémon and humans aren't that different after all.
While all this is happening Buizel just stared at me dodging like a god with an awe-struck expression, has this retarded ass otter never dodged in its life? Holy shit don't tell me that's actually true...
Buizel like the brave retard it is starts shooting water guns at the Poliwags again, all while they are just chilling on the Lotads. They slap the Lotads occasionally to speed them up, these guys are truly advanced at the art of bullying.
"You retarded ass otter, they have Water Absorb so stop using water gun." I said clearly disappointed with how brain dead this Buizel was.
Buizel looked back at me confused as fuck, this is gonna be a regular thing isn't it?
I pull out the Pokédex from my bag and focus the lens onto Buizel.
"Buizel, the Sea Weasel Pokemon. Buizel is a Water Type, It has a flotation sac that is like an inflatable collar. It floats on water with its head out. Gender: Male, Height: 2'04 - Attacks: Sonic boom, Water Gun, Pursuit, Quick Attack, Aqua Ring." informed the Pokedex.
Well color me surprised, first of all apparently he is a weasel? Nah I'm gonna stick with the otter. Secondly he's got Aqua Ring, I ain't seen no Buizel with that move.
"Okay then you retarded otter, use Sonic Boom." I said to Buizel, who happily accepted my command and sent two powerful Sonic Booms right into the Poliwag gang. They get launched right into the sky and Buizel continues the combo with two more Sonic Booms.
The Poliwag gang gets yeeted into the sky and blast off eerily similar to team rocket, something tells me I'm gonna see those 3 fuckers again someday. Meanwhile Buizel started flexing again as all the Pokémon of the lake start praising his heroics, it seems the little otter has a hero complex. Regardless of his complex one thing was undeniable, this Buizel had some incredible battle instincts. They way he hit that combo was spectacular.
This little orange otter may be a retard but he was one strong ass retard, having him as my starter would definitely be a huge step forward for me. I gotta accept that I am in this world, and I'm gonna thrive in this world.
As I was monologuing within my mind Buizel started worshipping me and so did every other Pokémon present at the lake, these opportunities are just falling right into my hands I swear.
"Buizel you are strong but you are dumb." I said blunt as a brick, all the Pokemon stared at Buizel for his reaction. He just nodded as though he was taking notes from his master.
"If you come with me I will make you the strongest Pokémon to ever exist." I said channeling my inner cult leader. Buizel seemed to be touched and grabbed my legs with tears in his eyes, brainwashing a retard was seriously way too easy.
With that set and done I chucked a pokeball and Buizel after he said his goodbyes to the Pokémon of the lake. Never did I ever think I would be catching a Pokemon but here I am, catching my starter.
My starter may be a retarded orange otter, but he was mine and he was going to dominate the world along side me.
I started to walk out towards the walking path visible from the lake, hopefully I can get to either Pewter City or Viridian City within the day. I'm gonna need to start preparing to take out Brock, thank god the otter is a water type.
"Let's take over the world Buizel." I said outloud to which Buizel's ball shook with excitement.