To Have Purpose

The two went to sleep so I found peace. Took a foldable chair to the roof of my apartment. Sat and just stared at the skies of Pacifica. Up above Pacifica you would find a space station that has been expanding enough to produce a large shadow. On the moon was a base where various individuals from different countries. The international moon base. This giant lump on the moon that even folks from below could see.

A salty wind came from the direction of Eastbrooks. Not far from where I was sitting On the horizons you could see the outline of the buildings of High-Gardens and Coleman with the mountain of Elesia towering over everything else. On the left of the mountain was a bald forest. Even in the dark you could see the sand reflecting the bald patches.

I was about to relax fully when I heard the hatch's ladder make a sound. Audrey carried her laptop and a spare foldable chair and folded it next to me. It made me wonder what she was up to.

"Thought you'd be working?"

She put her laptops aside and stretched her limbs. Audrey's a beautiful and fit woman. She has this tomboyish demeanor that makes her charming. Not to mention that the tough girl act is quite something to behold.

"What are you staring at?"

"Just thinking whether I should continue allowing this."

"Not that you have continuous work. It seems like your employer isn't so demanding compared to mine."

"It's not everyday that they deliver the madams to other people."

"I will not pretend that I find their work 'acceptable'."

"Sure, I'm not hoping for that. Just know that they are decent people. They are not criminals, just doing what they can to put food in their bellies, like everyone."

"You are strange, Nik. I'm not a narcissist. But even I can say that I have decent looks. So either you're not that attracted to us. You are heartbroken or you prefer men. So what is it?"

"I actually don't mind you three. I have a few male friends here. Hell, I wonder about what."

"You just like hanging out with pretty women?"

"Somehow I keep running to women and that's that. ANyway, not that it bothers me. I'm not that retarded and having a policewoman as a friends really keeps the naughty-fucking-me rather tamed."

Audrey chuckled.

"So it's now my fault that you are being nice? I'm not going to arrest you."

"Audrey, you shouldn't say that while having eyes that look like that."

A sharp look on her face. I almost wanted to point it out.

"Besides, I'm not really looking for anyone right now," I added. "I'm mostly just wandering. Mind lost on whatever I should do. Surviving isn't living, you know? If you aim at nothing then obviously you can't hit anything. You got that shit sometimes?"

"I do. Before I became an officer at least," she leaned her elbows on her thighs. Her eyes staring at the city. "It isn't a sob story, Nik. I just saw an old grandma get hit by one of the thugs of this city. Thought that it wasn't cool. It wasn't righteous for anyone to do that. I cannot allow it. I hated it. Why would anyone do that? It was a rather simple thought. I then studied criminology and graduated with enough merits to inherit a strong suit and protect the weak."

"Sounds like you were on this career path."

"What about you? You did finish that course of yours. Why are you not pursuing it?"

I shrugged my shoulders and then threw my hands as if I didn't understand why I wasn't pursuing that work any longer.

"It doesn't probably pay as much as I'd like it to pay me. I mean I earned enough to live and be fed well. But that's it. I don't really have much to do here other than drink and eat and do my work."

"What about your family?"

"I have none, Miss."

I found my shoulders sagging. For some reason there was an image that resurfaced in my mind. It was a library. And next to me was this lovely woman who was studying hard. I had this feeling of wanting to protect her. But then another image came. She just said things that I didn't want to remember or want to remember. I mean it's probably this body's memory that held a lot of meaning to him.

"None, really? Your face doesn't look like it has none."

"It's the usual heartbreak, Miss."

"Oh, you actually have a broken heart. Doesn't look like it."

She accused me. Nonetheless I could only shake my head.

"I have a stony face so it's hard to sometimes show it."

"Right, you always look like you have face paralysis. Didn't think that you'd be like that. What a surprise that you haven't found anyone to patch that hole up."

"Why would I patch a hole when I can just let it heal?"

"Whatever you say."

She leaned back and stared at the tower of Goro. It was once a tower that symbolized the power and progress of this city. Now it burns like a torch, signaling the start of a new era. The tower's surrounded with choppers and aerial vehicles. Each of them trying to keep the tower from totally burning down.

"Must be quite a mess."

"It is. Truthfully, I'd rather be worrying about that tower right now."

"Your superior didn't allow you?"

"They already have folks watching the tower."

Although I know what happened because of the spyware that I planted into their systems. I still asked her.

"Whatever happened? Haven't heard of it from the news."

"It's complicated."

"I can see that. I mean what kind of folks would assault a tower like that? Not someone who you could fuck with, easily."

"It's Corporation matter. You know how many of them fund the existing government. They are cunning enough to make use of the legal loopholes to make the local government obey them. I mean what can we do?"

"I really thought you'd be clamoring justice and what is right and wrong. Is this immoral or something like that."

"I would if I had the power. I'm old enough to know that sincere righteousness without power is just pathetic. To enforce peace you must have the strong arm to do it."

I clapped my arms.

"It's a good thing that you aren't so clueless, Miss!"

"What do you even know of me?"

"Nothing at all."

I don't know much about Audrey. I don't even remember much of the folks here. I guess Jisoo and Mr. Takemura really were the few folks that I could remember fondly.

"That can't be true."

"I hope so."

When I answered like that. Audrey stared at me with this hint of dissatisfaction before placing that dissatisfaction away. Was she thinking how lost I am? Or could she be just asking why I was such a bitch?

She played with her hair. She lifted her eyes to look at the tower once more.

"Pacifica is a nice city."

"We keep saying that, don't we?"

"That we do. Pacifica if you look at its exterior appearance. It's a city you could tell that you just want to run away from. Run and never look back at this piece of shit of a city. But the interior of Pacifica held its own beauty."

"I can see it."

Despite it all. This city has its town charm. I understand that well. Even this body of mine could have left this city, but this city had a hold of him. Personally, as someone who was holding on to this body, I wanted to leave. At the same time it was begging me to stay here. I couldn't refuse it. And perhaps because it was hoping for that longing again. A wish that might come true.

Thing is that I don't remember it easily. Even if I do remember. What was the point of staying or chasing after someone who'd throw you away so easily with fragile promises backing her words?

Wait for me.

Please be patient.

I'm afraid that even if her words were true.

The body that longed for that was already gone.

What was left was me.

Some fucker who awoke to this body before he drowned.

Audrey didn't answer. She stared at the tower as if she was making use of this comfortable time to relax. Then she stood up while cracking her neck.

"I should return to duty."

"You have a graveyard shift?"

"We all do. Besides, I'm not usually forced to have breaks. These two are so troublesome, always making excuses to make me hang out with them."

"Please, we know that you like them bothering you. Don't be such a tsundere, Miss."

"When did you become like Milana? It's not like that. Okay, fine, why would I hang out with my friends If I don't like them in the first place? Tsk, you should be happy, having to get to have three of us visiting you."

"I lost sleep. There's a lot of noise and I'm forced to be polite. And my furniture smells of beer now and women's perfume."

"If you hated it. Just say so."

"Nance won't have it. Besides, she's not bad. And you might know this, but she drove me around when I had no car. If she wasn't good to me, I guess my life would have been far harder. So I kinda owe her for that. Not to mention she got me a good ride."

"Well, then you have nothing to complain about. It's not like you treat us like women, you bastard."

"I mean… not that I'm trying to offend. But you act more macho than me, Audrey. Shit, the way you sound, look, and even behave makes me think that you are quite manly."

"Oh, so that's it. You think of us as men then?"

"Not really. Seriously, what is so wrong with trying to be friendly?"

"Nothing wrong with that. Fine, just make sure that you don't touch them or stare at them too much."

"I'm not a goddamn creep."

"I know. I wouldn't even dare to leave them here. Besides, even if you do dare to try. I'd kill you."

She said as if it was a matter of fact. Geez, this woman really doesn't mess around when it comes to protecting her friends. Her tone and expression was clouded with this sincere viciousness.

Ah, she really is a law-woman.

Audrey left as she said that. I stayed on the rooftop till morning when Nance texted me that she and Milana will have to go. They were suffering from a hangover. I scanned my living room after going down. It was a mess. Bottles everywhere and they even left their undergarments on the side as if it was a bother to keep them on.

Nance, who was listlessly walking around, took her bra and then looked at me. "Want a sniff??" She then took another lacy bra. "Or do you prefer hers?"

I found my face cringing at that. She laughed then held her head. Milana, who saw her underwear in the hands of Nance, took it from her. She hurried to the bathroom. Nance asked me to turn around and I could hear her clothes rustling. Honestly, I should be asking the same damn thing about them. Do you folks even see as a man as well?

The two didn't want to take a bath here so I offered to give him a ride. I drove them to Nance's apartment. Milana seems to have clothes in her apartment.

"Thanks big brother!"

The two of them left as I gawked at them. It looks like they look at me as if I was their older brother for some dumb reason. Then is Audrey their big sister? For some reason, I felt fine with it. Better than being treated like their damn servant.

I was about to go home when the Solomons called me. This time they want me to escort someone, and it was a request that I cannot refuse according to our agreement.