War is Coming

"Damn, how did Malaria do it?" The astounded passer-by student couldn't help but wonder. That cloth should've been rolled around her upper body, under the kimono no less.

"How did he get the enemy's underwear in the middle of battle?" One drooling male thought of the possibilities if he learned such a skill.

"He did it so handily without being discovered. He must be a pervert!" The Yamanaka girl couldn't help but flush red. What if he did it to her, what should she do?

"That's too degenerate! I'll report him to the Uchiha Police!" Tenten's mother also flushed red, she couldn't figure out if she would resist under such deft hands.

"That's right! Let's accuse and disclose Malaria together!" The Senju clansman was doing his best to remain on the side of justice. In reality though, he wanted to learn how Malaria did it.

"Beat up monster Malaria! Beat up monster Malaria!" The chorus began once again, with everyone wishing detrimental treatment to Malaria's wellbeing.

Malaria chuckled and thought, 'I think that is enough. There are about two hundred students here right now, plus the instructors.'

"It's business time now. Goddess Hyuuga Hikari's original chest cloth is to be live-auctioned!" Malaria waved the cloth in front of the male students and clearly sensed that they were breathing more sprightly after cathcing a whiff of his mosquito repellent.

The males gazes were turning more and more passionate. Hikari clenched her fists and held back her fury. She had seen brazen people before, but she had never seen someone as outrageous as Malaria.

Everyone in the audience seethed after Malaria's proclamation.

"Malaria, you are still daring to insult my Goddess!" Hiashi stomped his feet in anger, his Byakugan almost turning into a Sharingan from pure malice.

"Malaria, you are too strong compared to me, but I won't allow you to defame Goddess Hikari anymore. I'll pay you 100,000 Ryo to end this farce." The passer-by couldn't keep his mouth shut after thinking about what that cloth represents.

"Me aswell. I have to save Goddess Hikari from any more debasement. I'll pay you 200,000 Ryo." The drooling male puffed out his chest in righteous indignation.

"You've both been fooled by Malaria. I can't let this happen. I'll pay 500,000 Ryo for you to recognize the real maliciousness of Malaria!" Hiashi couldn't hold back anymore, he had to obtain that precious possession.

"Stop talking hogwash. Goddess Hikari's original chest cloth is mine. I'll pay 1,000,000 Ryo!" Hyuuga Hizashi, Hiashi's twin brother made an appearance. Just to spite his brother, he's going to purchase and keep it for himself.

"You're good, bro…" Hiashi couldn't help but feel embarrassed, thinking his brother came to help him purchase his beloveds chest cloth. Siblings truly are the closest of kin.

Eventually, a monstrously rich guy got the original chest cloth with 10,000,000 Ryo. But the guy's face turned frosty after he got the 'chest'-cloth; the label for how it should be washed as a table cloth wasn't torn off yet. Was it really the original Hikari cloth?

Most male students were relieved that the cloth wasn't their Goddess' original possession. They took great pleasure at the rich guy, another one of Malaria's many victims.

In the meantime, the students had to admit that Malaria was a genius merchant. He had sold a piece of tablecloth for ten million ryo. That was incredible!

However, something was not right. If it wasn't Hyuuga Hikari's chest cloth, where and how did Malaria get it? Everyone noticed Hikari's expression, she must be wearing the same kind of cloth. And what's with the delightful smell?

"Malaria is a scoundrel and a complete life hazard!" The Yamanaka girl wouldn't let up on her anger of being hoodwinked by Malaria every step of the way.

"That's right! He carried a chest cloth with him! Who could do that other than a freak?" Tenten's mother was still blushing red, even though she was mildly disappointed that his fingers weren't as magical as she imagined.

"Everyone noticed Goddess Hikari's expression. She must be wearing the same kind of cloth, but how did Malaria find out?" The Senju clansman pointed out the heart of the matter.

"Are you suggesting that Malaria has been spying on her on his free time?" Hiashi couldn't help but activate his Byakugan and stare the Senju-member dead in the eye.

"He certainly did last night. How else could he know what type of chest cloth Goddess Hikari is wearing today?" the man defended his case.

Hyuuga Hikari glanced at Malaria warily. She agreed with the idea that Malaria must've been spying on her when she was dressing herself, or he couldn't have known what chest cloth she was wearing right now.

"I give up this spar!" Hikari raised the seal of reconcilation. She had lost both of her chakra-kunai, and Malaria had that uncountably large mosquito swarm in his sleeves. There was no pointing in persevering.

Minato couldn't help but sigh. Malaria remained undefeated until the end, but atleast they have figured out his full strength. "Winner: Malaria!" he proclaimed to the audience.

"How much 'pink-mix' did he give to the examiner this time?" A spiteful 5th year student spat.

"Are you kidding me? A pervert like him made it through without a proper beating?" One of the girls couldn't help but clench her fists in exasperation. How useless are her fellow schoolmates!?

"I can see people talking about the Konoha Ninja Academy with disdain in the near future." A civillian who has a lot of familial ties with different merchants in the Land of Fire commented.

"Malaria never fought any match properly. He only kept on using his sleazy tricks like a disgusting salesman outside a brothel." Hiashi couldn't help but sneer in disdain. Had he gone up there, he would show Malaria the might of 64-palms!

"Malaria bribed the first examiner, maybe even the second one too. He can win however he fights in the assessment." The Uchiha little beauty felt disillusioned by everything that happened during this event.

"As a matter of fact, I don't think Malaria is all that weak. It's impossible to dodge a flying chakra-infused kunai with just tricks." The passer-by that had a positive feeling about Malaria commented.

"So what? He's still a scoundrel and a monster." The Yamanaka girl felt depressed about all of this.

"That's right! Beat up the monster Malaria for the purity of Konoha Ninja Academy!" The Uchiha little beauty tried to reignite her passion and anger with another slogan.

"Stop yelling. The assessment is already over, all he really needs to learn in the Academy is how to mould chakra, and he'll graduate in an instant." The Senju clansman glanced at her and gave his final comment.

"All right, I'll stop…" The Uchiha girl turned even more depressed. Nobody cares about her feelings anyway.

—

"Hey, Hyuuga Hikari, do you still want your chakra-kunai or not?" Malaria danced the throwing daggers over his two hands like a magician and smiled.

Hikari stopped and glanced back at him. "Are you magnamious enough to give them back to me free of charge?"

Malaria smiled. "I have a little kink: I take two, and only two things from beautiful ladies."

Furrowing her brow, Hikari asked curiously, "And what would those two be?"

Malaria reached out to Hikari and whispered in a voice only they could hear, "Their bodies and their hearts."

Then, he put the two chakra-kunais back in Hikari's hand and strode out of the arena with confidence. Adjusting his basque, tightening the scarf and correcting his glasses - he must say that was a cool delivery.

Hikari trembled dispassionately. What did Malaria mean with that? Body and heart? Was he going to take hers? She was already locked in with Hyuuga clan wether she likes it or not.

—

In the instructors area, Suzuki Yamaha, the first year's teacher, felt a strong migraine coming along, because Malaria had been fooling around instead of taking the assessment seriously.

He also took advantage of other people at any chance he got, utterly unlike the style of the Aburame clan. Just thinking about what he'll do once he learns chakra moulding sends a shiver down his spine.

Meanwhile, Danzo was rounding up the results of todays assessment with a focus on Malaria. He didn't find many candidates for his Root among the examinee's this year.

"Danzo-sama, you saw how strong Malaria was last night and got to compare him at the assessment. He's not on the same level as his peers." The Root Anbu made a comment, he felt like Malaria was quite the anomaly.

"I believe that the boy will suffer from his overconfidence. The Third Shinobi War has only just recently begun, it will be a good chance to temper him on the battlefield." Danzo replied.

Considering how inconsiderate Malaria is to his fellow villagers, and the irresponsibility he shows for his actions, Malaria would probably lose his life in the coming times.

Thinking about that, Danzo sent out a message to the Hokage that he would be leaving to the front-lines to prepare the intelligence gathering squads for the upcoming conflicts. The war is about to begin for real.

At this moment, Suzuki Yamaha had to get on stage and announce an important matter about the upcoming war, "According to the news from the border, Hokage-sama has declared that the Third Shinobi War has begun. Soon, you might have to graduate ahead of time and I hope you can cooperate with eachother on the battlefield in these trying times."

Then Suzuki Yamaha left in a hurry, not giving the students any chances to ask him about bribery in the forms of aphrodisiacs. However, Malaria rushed over to him and asked in a low voice, "Teacher Yamaha, how did the drugs work out for you?"

Suzuki Yamaha's face darkened like the bottom of a pot. This little bastard was definitely doing this on purpose. Some students even managed to overhear the mention of drugs.

Remembering the rumors, they were now convinced that the first year's teacher Suzuki Yamaha really did accept 'gifts' from Malaria! Throwing out the questions about the war from their heads, they rallied up.

"Everyone, Yamaha-sensei did accept Malaria's drugs!" Someone shouted out over the audience.

The whole training ground simmered, and the students began surrounding the poor Suzuki Yamaha in the middle. He tried doing the handseals for the Hiding Like a Mole Technique, but someone slapped away one of his hands.

"Sensei, do you deserve the Hokage's trust!?" Enraged, the students were clamouring for justice.

"Yamaha-sensei, you have to explain yourself today. Did you commit bribery? Did you… Use that drug?" With great disgust and apathy, all the little girls in the student body looked at him with dead eyes.

"We can't watch the Konoha Ninja Academy be destroyed by the likes of you!" Finally, the Uchiha little beauty found her spirit and started another slogan.

"That's right. We're proud of being students at the Konoha Ninja Academy! We don't want to be ashamed of it because of you!" Suzuki Yamaha's face started the sequence of events the Aburame elder went through once before.

His face went from white straight to purple. Before the transformation could continue to the green variant, Malaria shrilled in the crowd; "Look! There are tubes in sensei's pocket!"

All the students whispered and stared at Yamaha-sensei's pocket. "To prove your innocence, S-e-n-s-e-i, please show us the tubes."

"Please do it quickly, S-e-n-s-e-i, or we will do it for you." Looking at the malevolent little demons that crowded every cardinal direction, Suzuki Yamaha could only comply.

"Look! It's really the 'pink-mix'!" Yamaha stared at the two bottles in his hand in disbelief. The world was spinning, the earth dancing and the sky was falling. 'That devil planted them on me when he ran up to whisper that nonsense.' He realized he was set up from the very beginning!

"We've got evidence. What do you have to say for yourself, S-E-N-S-E-I-I-I…" Suzuki Yamaha couldn't hear the continuation as he blacked out by frothing at the mouth. His face was twisted like a raisin with the color of a pear.

Dismayed, the students were unsure about what to do with this situation. The sensei truly didn't look like 'that' kind of person. In just a moment, Malaria's shrill cry sounded again but from further away; "Let's send him to the police station!"

"Where is Malaria? Where did he go?" The students looked around to find some answers to all of this. "Capture Malaria! He can't run away! If anyone should be arrested, it should be him!"