Little 101

(Trigger warning: Trauma and abuse)

"I....what....what does being a caregiver entail?" I ask without even thinking.

~~~~~~~Marcus's POV~~~~~~~

I'm a little taken aback by Ethan's sudden question. He wants to know about caregiving?

"You....you want to know about it?" I ask as he starts to blush.

"I-I-I mean....if I'm gonna be rooming with you all semester I might as well get to know you and your..... hobbies" he says, making me chuckle.

"Well....A caregiver, as the title implies, takes care of people while they're regressed. So, say someone.... we'll use you for an example if that's alright?" I ask, making him blush but nod. "Okay so say you regress to about.....three. Three year olds aren't able to do much for themselves. They need someone to cook for them, usually help clean them up when they get messy, or if they're still in diapers, someone to change them. That's essentially what a caregiver does, what any parent would do for their child."

"B-but for...a full grown adult? Isn't that a little....weird? Like why would you enjoy treating an adult like a child and doing everything for them?" He asks, looking at me inquisitively.

"It's....hard to explain really. I've just always loved caring for others. I used to babysit when I was younger and really enjoyed taking care of children" I said with him looking at me intently as I talked. "Then as I got older I learned about the age regression community through my cousins who are also caregivers. They introduced me to a whole world of people who've been hurt throughout their lives and need someone to help them heal. I guess.... I guess it makes me feel like I'm needed in a way?"

He blinked for a moment as he seemed to internally try and comprehend everything I'd just said.

"So...do you just like... adopt an adult to take care of?" He asked, making me chuckle.

"I mean, in a way, yeah. Some will care for their significant other, like for example my cousin who takes care of her boyfriend. Others will take care of a little solely as if they're their child and that's their entire relationship" I say as he nods.

"I don't fully understand it, but it sounds kinda nice. I....I never really had the best childhood growing up. Dad....never really cared all that much, especially with the whole diaper thing" he said, his words making my heart hurt.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, but I'm curious...why exactly are you in diapers? Were you in an accident or..." I ask, trying to be as gentle as possible with my question.

"I....I was born with a defect....I never developed any nerves going to my bladder. Mom and dad tried and tried to potty train me to no avail until finally they took me to the doctor where they figured out I COULDN'T be potty trained" he said while I looked at him sympathetically.

"I'm sorry, that must have been hard growing up with" I said as I moved over to his bed, resting a hand on his shoulder.

"Y-yeah... Most....most kids would stop playing with me the second they found out I had to wear diapers. They'd say they "don't wanna play with a big baby" and just make fun of me or ignore me all together" he said as he started to tear up a little.

"And...you said your dad wasn't thrilled about the diapers?" I asked, possibly pushing a little much but wanted to know what he meant.

"Y-yeah. At first he....he was sad that his son would never be normal but as the years went on he became more.... hateful about it. He'd....he'd scream at me asking why I couldn't be more normal. He'd constantly complain about how much my diapers were costing him and....and...." he started to trail off as he clutched his stomach.

"Hey hey hey, it's alright. I'm sorry I....I shouldn't have pushed you into remembering that" I said, half understanding where that was going with him clutching his stomach in an almost defensive manner.

"Mom....Mom finally got tired of the way he treated me and we left. We moved towns after they divorced and I moved to a new school. I tried making friends by that point, but I was too.... awkward and then Mike....after that everyone treated me awfully. They'd laugh and call me a "diaper baby" and..... you're.... you're the first person that's ever actually been....nice to me...." he said, making my heart break for him.

"Ethan I'm so, so sorry you had to go through all of that for something you have no control over. They're all a bunch of mea-....a bunch of jerks that didn't deserve to know you" I said as I pulled him into a side hug.

"I-I....can I be honest?" He asks, to which I nodded.

"Of course" I said as I looked at him, hanging on every word.

"When you woke me up....I'd been dreaming about.... about what my life would have been like if I'd had a dad that actually....loved me that's why...." he said, stopping short of finishing his sentence.

"That's why you accidentally called me dad?" I asked, only getting a shy nod from him. "Hey I get it, it's nothing to be embarrassed about. I honestly didn't mind it. Honestly I... I've kinda dreamed of having a little one day that'd call me that and...."

I stop, contemplating something. I couldn't possibly ask him, could I? I mean he's only just learned what age regression is. I doubt he'd ever go for it, but still...

"Hey Ethan.... would you maybe....wanna try regression?" I ask, holding my breath as soon as the words left my mouth.