Chapter 17

"YEEOOOOOOW!"

"Oh, I am sorry, Jounin-san! I will fix that for you..." Kasashin, my rule 63 clone, apologized by patting the thigh. It wouldn't be so bad...if it wasn't for his state. At this point, any slight touch would be a pain for Mr. Baki.

"OW OW! J...just get out of here, you crazy girl..."

"Hmph. How rude!" My clone kicked Baki in the jewel, and turned around as she grabbed her soccer ball. I reappeared to Baki who used his leg to caress his balls (yes he was that desperate) and asked, "24 hours have passed. I think you should start spilling out,"

"W...won't...won't betray my village..."

"If you start to speak, then we will spare some of your fellow shinobi. It's the Sound that are really creepy and lacks of moral, you know?"

"Screw you!"

"Ah, so you need another slap of reality on the fact that so many things were wrong, including your Kage's economy strategy. Fine then! Have it your way!"

I prepared my next greatest torture:

Team 7, surreal style.

"What the hell is this? You're forcing me to watch a cartoon?"

"Yup," I said as I forced his eyelids to open permanently until I close them.

What proceeded was just a simple reenact of the daily live of Team 7's members...except, I changed the texture of the world with Baki's faces.

"What in the name of Jashin and every fucked up cult is this hell? Everything have the texture of me! Gah! I can't believe it! You make me fear my own face!"

"If you keep the truth from me, I will make sure that you will want to rip your own face after this,"

"B...B...Bring it..."

I sighed when Baki showed his stubbornness, so I decided to up the ante.

With the power of Kung-Fu.

"FIST OF THE RAMEN FOX! I will defeat you, and become your team member, Hatake Kakashi!" Swarms of foxes made of ramen suddenly surrounded my mostly unchanged clone, aside from the afro.

"By the power of porn, I shall bring your salad!"

"No! Not the salad! I cannot betray the ramen, not when I have to...pass their own test!" 'Naruto' proclaimed, as he turned into a jar of anthropomorphic fishcakes, chanting 'test test test' like a mad clown in a pimped out unicycle, his ramen foxed turned into crossdressing Naruto as cheerleaders, and they applied bad make-up at that.

"STOP! STOP! I WILL TELL YOU EVERYTHING! JUST STOP THE DAMN HALLUCINATION! The one-wheel bike, the horror, the horror..."

"Okay, okay," I stopped the genjutsu right in transition, before I showed him graphics of where we found Suna and Oto's bases. Man, out of all thing, the unicycle was the one that scared him? "Now, these are the area where we found your shinobi. Anywhere else?"

"The underground! We found old bases of your village, south of the farm area! More sterile than hospital, there's absolutely nothing and no one there, but it did the job as hiding place. We use them for our backup ninja and storing our equipment for the second wave attack,"

"I see," Danzo. I hope you didn't deliberately unsealed these places..." Meet any cripple in the way?"

"No. But one of the Oto-nin was weirdly familiar with them, even unsealed some of them,"

So Orochimaru borrowed it from Danzo, with his permission or not. "Thank you for the help. As a prize, there won't be any mental damage that will succumb you into permanent coma,"

"Oh, thank god!"

"But to keep you down for the rest of the invasion, the pain in the groin will be left intact,"

"FUCK ME!"

"YYYYYYEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW!"

"And the deed is done," I said as Baki fell over, mouth started to foaming.

"Commander's down! Turn the signal-aaagh!"

Unfortunately, our ANBU didn't manage to stop the signal, but at least we incapacitated many Suna-nin that scrambled around after I defeated their Jounin. However, it made the message got mixed, so hopefully the attack won't be as coordinated.

"YOSH KAKASHI! SHALL WE USE THIS OPPORTUNITY TO TEST WHO'S STRONGER?" Said Gai as he kicked a guy to a wall, created a human sized hole in the process.

"Yeah. Kill or incapacitate every single shinobi around the civilian area. I will carry the civilians to the safe place. We can use Fourth Gate, but I think I will refrain since I need to keep our citizen's neck safe,"

"YOSH!" The Green Beast transformed in instant and started to wreck every enemy in the area. For me, I had to carry civilians here to safety room. But first, I need to call Sakura first.

The girl was hounded by several perverts from Otogakure when I arrived there. The creep kept saying about her nice thighs and butt. I almost called them for their pedophilia act, but I noticed the fire seal, which immediately consumed them when they stepped into the line. Disregarded their agony, I punched them in the neck so hard their neck broke at instant, and while it did not always meant death, it meant pain, for people who will spend the last 72 hours of their life as quadriplegic. Their last hope was a neutral or kind medic, and even then their career as bad ninja already over.

"Good job, Sakura! I knew the genjutsu training will help. Now, we need to wake Naruto,"

"Sensei, what are you on? Of course Naruto able to dispel it, even Haku...Naruto, wake up! How could you get asleep with this massive but weak genjutsu?"

"Ouch!" Man, she should have know that Naruto really fell behind in Genjutsu... "Oh, come on, Sakura-chan..."

"Okay, guys. I have to secure this stadium first, so I need you guys to do this alone. All of you, including Haku, go and help Sasuke in catching up with Gaara. Grab two more people, preferably Shikamaru and a Jounin. But if they are busy, then get Ino instead. However, two of you need to be placed somewhere distant since you can't attract too much attention from the soldiers,"

"Ah! Modified three platoon with one substitution and one tracker. Right, Sensei?"

"That's right, Sakura. Now go, and recruit your people,"

"Yes, Sensei!" Naruto and Sakura saluted as they started the plan by gaining people.

"Uh, does this means I am a ninja now?"

"Yes, Haku. Sorry that your enlistment was done in this chaos,"

"I do not mind. Actually, it's fitting our work as agent in the world of chaos, so if anything, I'm flattered," Man, Haku was too humble for this world.

"Okay, so while Sakura and Naruto went to wake Shikamaru and the other, meet your tracker for today," I summoned my smaller dog. "Say hello to Pakkun?"

"What the hell are we up to now, Kakashi?"

"Invasion. Now excuse me, but I have a Hokage to be saved. " I said as I went to the Kage seats. Man, sometimes I didn't understand my dog. He got scarred against Orochimaru, and in war all he said was a reminder to Haku that he wasn't cute?

"Hatake-san! We can't enter the barrier. We tried to use our clone, and the barrier immediately incinerated them,"

"I know. This is the 427th jutsu that I copied. Have you tried to make a new entrance from the ground?"

"Look at that hole from Tiger's attempt to break through!" I glanced at where they pointed, and immediately frowned. The jutsu have been modified to cover any new hole from the ground, which meant that absolutely no one could help our Hokage. Unless...

"Stand back, guys. I think I have a way to save Sandaime-sama with my new jutsu,"

Hmm. If there's a twist of fate, anyone who got the Kamui will be awaken in Obito's portal-world, and by even a lesser chance, somehow survived. But who will be lucky and not evil enough to get out of the pedophile's lair...

Of course, the flute girl could get it. At least Tayuya hated her teammates, actually knew how to compliment someone's skill, and had her own moral codes, so it might be a break for her.

With that, I released my Kamui, tried my best to engulfed her whole without severing any limb.

"WHAT THE FU-" The job was done, the girl's trapped, and the barrier soon will weaken and-

Damn it. I forgot Ukon could replace her position as the fourth man in the barrier. I decided to use it once more, but Hokage-sama stopped me before I could.

"Kakashi, let this old man have his fight with his student. Use your energy to save everybody else. I know that energy depleted a third of your chakra. One more, and we might be losing you today instead of me,"

I begrudgingly nodded, hoped that the old man won't have to die here.

"So Orochimaru, before we fight..."

"Just for your information, sensei, that was my last tears for you."

"That's not it. It's just...why do you have two left legs now? I can't recall any advantage from having that kind of physical abnormality."

The previously confident Sannin now became furious, he barely able to get his anger in check. "GRRR! That moron Kakashi severed my leg with the same jutsu that he used to terminate my royal bodyguard! And because his friend managed to land a lucky hit to Kabuto, by the time he fully recovered, he had barely enough time to just cloned my left leg as replacement! Once I am done with you, he will pay!" He then pulled a sketch of an adolescent boy, looked similar with him, except with blue hair and even more dashing appearance. "Me and my sweet, little child...yes...he will pay..."

"...Okay, is this the part where Jiraiya said all your wrongdoings had been an elaborate long prank, and proceeded to ask me to marry you with someone you brought while he desperately asked Tsunade to do the same?"

"...I think you really get old, sensei, because it's all real."

"Of course. Sorry, but things got a little crazy sometimes in this village," Hokage-sama said, tried to not bother with how much Orochimaru missed the point that he was the one who brought insanity here.

There. That's the last of them. One of the last Uzumaki, Karin.

"Hmm...Naru and Sasu..."

Well that was interesting. Kurama's chakra boost made Naruto a ladies man for some reasons.

Oh dear. Now I knew what happened in that censored scene. He just popped that legendary Uzumaki boner, didn't he?

"Ah, so here's where the sleeping audience at, waiting for their grim reaper to show and rip their hearts out."

"Yes it is, Mr. Evil."

"Now, as we going to off your pathetic vill-" I stopped him with a punch to the nose, caused it to bleed. "My nose! You hit me in the nose!"

"Duh. I am pissed by this invasion. Why should I play nice with you when you just spilled how vile you are? And you must be stupid enough to gloat in front of Hatake Kakashi. Did you know that I already made five plans to kill every single terrorist that want to spill innocent blood in this stadium?" Well, that was half the truth. Actually, I spent a whole week to came up with all of them; I just implied that I already made them on the spot to boast.

"You...It doesn't even matter if you killed me. All of my comrades will finish the villagers in other rooms," I didn't need to gave a response to that one. All I needed to prove him wrong was the painful agony of one of his friend. "What the hell was that? Aya?!"

"You are really stupid if you think that we haven't install security to stop intruders. Right now the seal in all those rooms must have...fried two ninja, incinerate three, and caused massive sensory discomfort for the other five that made them an easy target to my fellow shinobi. Also, just in case, my biggest dogs are roaming those corridor, waiting for a signal," sounds of someone being ripped apart was heard not far from us. "Aand he's gone."

That made something snapped into him, just like what I wanted. "I'm gonna kill you now!"

I didn't even bothered to defeat him with any jutsu, just my taijutsu alone was enough to separate the head from his body. I wanted to make sure that death rates were low, but frankly this man was just a psychopathic scum.

"Hey, Kakashi! Can you come here?"

"Tenzo?" I called back. I just wanted to reach him to destroy the bases first, but he got me first.

"Please, Kakashi-sempai. I am more comfortable with my new codename."

"Okay, Yamato. I was just teasing you. Now, what's this that you want from me? We have a village to be protected from invaders. Not to mention that I just got info about where they store their backup ninja and equipment for second wave attack."

"If you help me, then we can do that at the same time too!" Yamato reassured me, his eyes got shiny again, like when I introduced advanced architecture to him. This either meant something good, or something real bad.

"Okay, I am interested,"

"I need your help to unleash my greatest weapon and art that will save this village! The rolling stadium!"

A little beat happened, and my clone happened to poofed out just at the right time to show its, uh...potential. And sadly, I could see how he's right. Yeah, better to think of that rather than Naruto's boner. "Uh...how's it going to work again?"

"I just need someone to run in the treadmill, another guy to use the static bike, and one more person to monitor the area behind us. Leave me to deal with the rest of its mechanism."

"Okay, okay. I'll go grab Anko and Gai to do the rest of it."

"Now. For the inevitable final touch..."

"Tobirama, do you know any way to deny Edo Tensei?" Hashirama asked as Orochimaru started to walk forward to plant the special seal to control his brain. The pale Sannin managed to lock his sensei with his snakes, but only minutes after the Hokage kicked the two coffins way out of his reach. All it did made the two dead Hokages regained their actual personality, as Hashirama became much more...talkative after a minute or so.

"I died before I even managed to give the finishing touch to the jutsu, brother. You may try to break through with sheer will, however. It might be similar with how you tamed the Kyuubi."

"But our power have been cut to only a quarter, and that mad man have improved your jutsu!" Hashirama whined, but only got a shrug from Tobirama. "Well then, here goes nothing. HRRRRGH!" The man tried to escape his fate...and ended up making a raspberry-like noise. "Oh, god! I am supposed to be a zombie, and somehow I fart louder than I ever was. This is embarrassing..."

"Was Senju Hashirama always like this, Sensei?"

"The man's a goofball, I admit," Hiruzen confirmed.

Hashirama tried to admonished his predecessor and his creepy pupil, but he noticed that he moved his arms in indignation despite the control. "Hey, I managed to get out! Ha! You won't get me, creepy pale-AAAGH! Curse you and your own powerful will!"

"Seriously, First Hokage? You think a weakling can use this jutsu?" Orochimaru said as he strengthened his lock on the deceased Kage's body.

"Well, Mito somehow managed to taught it on a beggar..."

That made everyone around the area cursed the insanity of Uzumaki's clan. "No wonder almost everyone teamed up to destroy Uzukiogakure..."

"While I still grieve over my inability to save more than like dozens of them or so, I can't deny that even compared to us, their demeanor were...unsettling."

"And one of them's near. I knew that red-haired girl is Uzumaki," Hiruzen hid the fact that he was glad Orochimaru still didn't suspect Naruto as real Uzumaki. He was glad that Minato, while not from any clan, actually capable of creating a new one had he made enough children considering how he somehow altered the hair of Uzumaki. "Soon as I finished my business here, I'll go to their ruin and-"

Orochimaru stopped his rambling when a shadow appeared behind him. Feared that someone have infiltrated his barrier, he turned around, only to notice the stadium started to enclose itself.

"The stadium's closing on us," Hiruzen noticed what's happening. Unknown to anyone else but him one of his smaller monkey summon was cutting his and Enma's snakes while silencing it at the same time.

"Must be a security measure against us. Hn. No matter. As soon as I control the first two Hokages, this village will burn to the ground, and I shall control it above the ashes."

"Uh, you do realize that we're nowhere near as powerful as we should be, right?"

"Yes. At this state, none of us would be able to defeat Hiruzen alone. Are you certain you can make us destroy this village to the ground?"

Orochimaru got ticked off as his plans getting scrutinized by the dead Hokages. His smug expression changed into an upset one. "I am confident enough that I can fight off four-tails with my own strength. And after I am done with this old fool, I will replace the talisman with another talisman that have command to destroy everything in this village. Also, I have improved your jutsu, Tobirama. You may nowhere near as strong as your prime, but you can beat most Jounin here."

"How about the other powerful clans?"

"Yeah. I bet Hatake's best member can-"

"DON'T REMIND ME OF THAT FOOL!" The smug Sannin finally snapped; Kakashi Hatake became his sore point despite the still big difference in power.

"HA! I knew you're not that strong enough-AAAGH!"

"Mock me once more, and I'll use my mind to more than lock your body on the spot!" The Snake Sannin warned the First Hokage as he about to jammed his talisman to his brother. He did not even care for the sneak pole attack from the old Sarutobi; he had enough speed to both jammed the kunai and dodged the attack after.

And their world turned upside down. Specifically, the stadium turned 90 degrees at such instant speed, it shocked Orochimaru who ended up taking the pole attack after all. He had no choice but to use his talisman's kunai to save himself from falling.

The two dead Hokages, still unable to do anything on their own, fell into the barrier below them. Orochimaru ordered his bodyguards to change the barriers into impenetrable one, but it was too late; the Hokages fell into the new ground, and the forbidden jutsu ensured that the damage they took from passing the barrier was just a flesh wound.

"While I am glad this is happening to us, I still unable to comprehend what's actually happening," Said Tobirama who began to regenerate his body.

"I think we just see the greatest infrastructure engineering feat! And my wood DNA turned out to be passed into someone!" Hashirama said with a glee. He had been wondering why the wood release did not even passed into his brother. Turned out everything was well in the world. "Anyway, at least the creepy pale man can't reach us no more. And since he still hadn't jammed the seals into our skull, the only thing he could do is to keep his control on us to prevent us to move freely and actually thwarted whatever he wanted."

Tobirama nodded in agreement. He did a double take, and ended up moved his left arm to test it. "I just moved my arm. Seems like his control have been lessening on us. Range's still a problem in this jutsu. Or at least, being burned in that barrier did something to our control."

"Finally, a lovely news in this fiasco!"

"Former Hokages! Uh, are you okay? And which side are you on?" Some ANBU asked them while the rest make a stance in case they turned to be hostile.

"Yes, we're fine. And before you asked, Orochimaru brought us back to life. Don't worry, we're out of his control now,"

"In that case, we have to escape this stadium. Our ANBU leader told us to get any of our ninja to run away from this place ASAP," The ANBU motioned to the two dead Hokages to follow them, leaving the fuming Sannin with his four bodyguards and an old teacher of his. None of them hearing about a wish for a good luck to the current Hokage, almost as if he would suffer in the scheme.

"That's it! Tenzo just made the list of my sworn enemy!"

"I guess he deserved a raise, after all. And I won't deny him his hobby to do architecture and-"

Hiruzed did not have enough time to finish his sentence, as the cutting edge infrastructure decided to unleash its full potential at the moment. It spun at a very high speed, like a rolling ball from one of Akimichi's jutsu. His pale pupil ended up being bounced between the now solid wall, ensured pain even for the man who had his body modified to become softer. Even for Hokage who managed to hold into the ground with his monkey pole, thanks to preparation time from accidentally heard the whining of some ANBU that unfortunately got the spinning stadium first, the ridiculously high rotation made the old Kage still suffered from the velocity of the stadium. As if it wasn't even bad enough, the thing bounced like crazy, and soon it left its foundation to wreck anyone poor enough to face it head-on.

For the first time in the decade, Orochimaru and his teacher agreed on one topic.

"CURSE YOU HATAKE KAKASHIIII! CURSE YOU TENZO!"

"EVEN IF I KNOW THIS IS YAMATO'S FAULT, I WILL SOMEHOW PUNISH YOU TOO, HATAKEEE!"

Somehow, I felt like I need to punch Yamato for no reason.

"Wind attacks from 7 o'clock!" Anko shouted, and a wood shield popped out before another block of wood slammed the ninja responsible for the attack. " Three Sound Ninja from three o'clock!" The stadium used one of the seal to change its direction and ended up slamming its whole body into the three enemies and crushed them. "God damn, you're real good at this, Yamato! I can almost kiss you just for making this mecha!"

Indeed, it was a benefit to us. Most of the formation by the invaders ended up being abruptly broken by our appearance, as most of them either ran away in fear or wondered what the fuck happened anymore. Somehow the other village defenders were not too shocked when they saw the gigantic ball rolling to help them, which meant that Yamato have at least told them that there was a new and insane defensive mechanism in Konoha. That, or they have anticipated Yamato's brand new insanity.

"Nah, you're belong to Sempai. But where's the Kazekage's kids run to, man?"

"They must be running to one of their secret infirmary. If he didn't turn into One-Tail already, that is."

"One Tail? Oooh, that's basically a WMD treaty betrayal. Kuna really need to explain all of this. Especially when it's all about lacks of jobs," Yamato blubbered out the facts to everyone.

"So this is all about missions from Wind Country that got outsourced to us? Man, this is stupid. They should be negotiating it to their Daimyo, not starting a war! I mean, how much does the ration alone cost for doing this crap?"

"YOSH! I once counted the cost for one S-Rank garrison mission with 10% of our military force, and it's easily exceed our regular expense for 5 months. Their only way to gain profit from this village, is by pillaging our saving and more!" My overtly enthusiastic friend made his estimation.

"And even then, if they're really in dire state, they would run out of money with this attack, and probably massively indebted with Otogakure. I agree that this is not a smart invasion by any means. I'd bet that the Kazekage's almost certainly would be replaced due to this event."

"That's true. Oh, wait. I think I see something. Turn around, Anko!"

"YOSH!"

In one corner, we saw a Sand Ninja tried to protect our civilians from his fellow ninjas. Huh. Weird view. But regardless, we poked the assaulter on their back, and when they turned around to see what's the big idea that tapped their back, they saw just how big the idea was.

After we swatted away the attackers like bugs, uncaring if they turned into red paste or just knocked out comically, unexpectedly the Suna Nin bowed in front of us.

"We're sorry that you have to experience this attack. I can assure to that I am no longer your enemy here."

"So you're not the bad guy? Funny. Hokage-sama said we have to avoid dealing critical blows to Sand-nin unless they use one of their wind cutter technique, but it's clear who want to attack first, and who greedily want to take over other village."

"The original plan was to do military blockade against this village and use Gaara-sama as extra threat until you all agree to stop accepting mission from our Daimyo and more, but Sound's leader managed to convince Raisa-sama that they need to cripple you with direct attack instead. But even within the new plans agreement, they're still going too far. This is a war over economy dispute, not total annihilation!" The man finished his explanation with a bit of anger. The guy really looked angry. Seemed like some of the soldiers only followed the war due to their honor, despite the nonsensical nature of the plan.

"How about your fellow ninja that use the wind cutter technique? These are some really deadly technique, sir."

"Oh, these are the people who pushed Yondaime to accept the invasion plan. I already lost respect for them, but it seems they're really thirsty for blood for almost no reason except grudge, which was silly since the one that have legitimate beef is our puppet users, and the only one who joined this invasion is one of our Kage's son. You can fight them with more prejudice."

"Thank you for clarifying what truly happened. Is there any battalion where we can be guaranteed that they won't pursue the innocents?" Yamato asked.

"East part of Konoha won't be troubled by us, but even then they still get those Sound Ninjas that you need to worry about. However, you'd better pick the West part first. Our soldiers coalition is at the biggest there, and their leaders are power hungry enough," The man explained to us. I guess Baki didn't know about this opinion split.

"Thank you again, sir. We advise you to retreat to your base until everything's done. That is, if you don't mind if we steamrolled Suna's army here and there."

"We deserved it for our greed. Just...don't attack anyone who surrender themselves willingly. Oh, is there any Hatake clan in this village left?" He asked before he left us.

"Yo. We're still kicking, although I've been keeping distance from them for years, and I am still busy with my genin to make any amends," I said.

"Then you're lucky. As I said, our puppet users still haven't forgive Hakumo for killed some of their best puppet masters. Had their anger still blazing like Amaterasu, they might joined this war."

"Maa, maa. So that's why I have been blacklisted from doing any mission with Suna nins even before I did anything," I took a note.

"Indeed. Anyway, take well all of you. I hope neither of us suffer massive damage from this."

"It's too late to say that," Anko grimaced at the several destroyed buildings around us. But the man already ran away.

Well the guy didn't lie.

West flank was infested with not just Sound's vermints, but also Orochimaru's pest snakes as well.

"DAMN IT! I CAN'T MOVE!" The Sound-nin shouted, and he with his friends could only screamed in fear after he noticed several long shadow entrapped them. We crushed the attackers with no problem at all, leaving several flat enemies in our way.

Soon we arrived in the site between the titans; Gamaken was fighting several snakes around his size. What a coincidence that we arrived just when his sword broke. We could give him a hand-

"Excuse me."

"What are you doing-WOAH!"

"I am sorry, sir..." The giant toad as he slammed the rolling stadium into the head of one of the snake, killed it in instant.

"Ha! Nice initiative there, froggy! Oh, here let me help you with that," Yamato launched three wood stakes into the three-headed snake, pinned them down before Gamaken used the stakes to do further damage.

"Can I ask you to change into a more traditional weapon form? I broke my sword in this fight, and I am not well-trained in using ball as weapons."

"How about this?" Yamato used his wood release to create a long grip handle, while several wood spikes appeared around the ball. Basically, Yamato turned us into combat mace.

"I hope it'll do..."

Gamaken started his attack by swing the mace into one of the python. Said snake avoided the attack, but Yamato fixed the outcome by extended one of the stake, resulted in the snake got impaled anyway. Gamaken finished it off by repeatedly slammed the mace and the snake into the ground, and he finished it off with a front-flip to avoid a lounging rattlesnake and did the final slam to the python.

The gigantic swordmaster in training then faced three other snake, one of it was the recovering rattlesnake. The toad exploited the still dazed snake by throwing all his weight to the snake, and the attack resulted in the death of the snake. But the other snake took the window of opportunity to attack the toad; Gamaken's right leg ended up being constricted by one of the gigantic boa, and its companion, a red snake, ready to give its poison to the gigantic amphibian.

Before we could do anything help the red toad, a flying object landed its fist into the lunging snake, made it flying into the mountain. We all used the distraction to spin the stadium of doom, ripped the boa apart before Gamaken finished it off with a mace slam. Many of the human enemies ended up being arrested or running away after seeing us finished the biggest snakes in five minutes or so.

"Seems like that help have arrived..." Gamaken said before he dropped us without a care.

"Watch it, Gamaken! We still have other business to attend here," said my girlfriend after we landed ungracefully.

"I am sorry for my clumsiness, sir...whoever you are."

"How many times do I have to tell you you're a fine fighter, Gamaken? It's just your day off time when you become... Well, what do we have here. A stadium that somehow walked out of its foundation. Is this what you have been working on, Yamato?" Jiraiya asked, he was already in his Sage Mode, with two old toads in his shoulders to regulate his Sage Mode.

"That young man who can use wood release? Ah, so this is one of the few good result from those meddling by that fool Danzo."

"Yeah, Ma. That one," The other elder toad said.

"That's right, Jiraiya-sama. It is the creation of mine, with help from Kakashi, Anko and Gai to operate it."

"YOSH! I WILL GIVE EVERYTHING I HAVE TO OPERATE IT! AND IF I CAN'T DO IT, THEN WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?!" Gai screamed, not noticing the loudspeaker that Yamato have installed in the room.

"I and Anko are not absent, I can assure you."

"Listen, can you go to my other student? I tried to summon Gamabunta, but he's currently occupied. I'm afraid the idiot summoned the boss toad, and if his mood's really low..."

"Then Gamabunta will crush him

We were rushing to the battlefield when two dead Hokages approached us.

"Hey, is my bloodline successor really there?"

"First Hokage?"

"Yup. In flesh! One of my sorrow was that none of my clan have that Wood Release, but it turned out that we do have one user. This means that you can finally make wood babies and-"

"Thank you, sir. But I'm not a Senju member. I was...a lab rat," my friend explained with a tinge of sadness.

"Oh. So it's really an unsustainable mutation," The man said, obviously saddened by this revelation. None of us decided to say that the only true Senju left now's possibly at her menopause.

This was one of the few times when I really hoped for an illegal experiment. Just for the Senju's sake.

All of us then wordlessly decided to join the center of the fight.

Where we arrived, things did not looked good. Sasuke and Sakura looked exhausted, Haku and my little dog looked like they've exhausted all their idea, and Gamabunta actually struggled against One-Tail. Seemed like Shukaku the Raccoon was stronger than the original series.

"Damn it!" Naruto screamed as he was thrown out of his ride by the sand.

"Whoa! So this is the masterpiece from that weirdo Yamato? It's actually kinda cool."

"I'm not weird, kid," Yamato retorted, irritated by the remark. Hate to say it, but my students were right, friend.

"You made a spinning stadium and somehow turned it into our defensive system. Of course you're-Kabuto? Eh, what are you doing here?"

Oh no. Naruto, get away from there!

"Same thing that Master Orochimaru have attempted for years. To take over an Uchiha," Kabuto said, showed his color to Naruto and friends.

He got bitten by my dog for his trouble, and ended up having to dodge the senbons from Haku.

I used the emergency backdoor and descended into the battleground to save everyone from the trouble that was Kabuto. And it did; his eyes throwing daggers at me, just after Haku dodged one of his sharp weapon. It was obvious that he was consumed by anger for a moment, and that was enough to take his attention away from murdering the kids.

"Sensei! Is Kabuto a traitor?"

"Yes, Naruto. And he's mine, so just worry about Gaara there," Naruto nodded and began to ran to his giant summon again. "You're really unable to help, Haku?"

"Actually, I just checked with our prisoner Temari and Kankuro. We can force Ichibi to return to Gaara. But I can't use senbon because it will just make him fall asleep even worse."

"Actually, Naruto maybe still need your speed to hit Gaara in case he's unable to do so." Haku slapped his head and decided to join the fight. I turned around to face that freak Kabuto. "So you come back for more..."

"Hn. You should've take a note about how lucky you are in our confrontation before. And for your information, my spine have fully recovered," Kabuto boasted to me.

"Maa, I thought all you creeps have taken that soft body modification. Why don't you have it?"

"A price to minimize risk in my mission as a spy since I cannot take the risk of having monthly check-ups with a non-mole doctor. But after all of this finished, I will take that modification to serve Lord Orochimaru better."

Before I said something regarding that, a certain dead Kage stood besides me. "Need a help? My brother can help the young Uzumaki there by himself."

"Thank you, sir. And if it turned out that Gai can't power up the stadium-"

"FOURTH GATE! YOOOSH!" soon I sensed that drastic energy rise, enough to be mistaken as someone readied for ninjutsu. As it turned out, Gai with Fourth Gate unleashed had enough speed to doubled his job to recover what was lost by my absence just fine.

"Well, seems like Orochimaru's underling needed that well-deserved beating after all! Ready to go, Senju-san?"

"For Konoha."

"For Kono-"

"Is that a voice of that blasted Hatake-DAMN IT, SENSEI! Can't you see I'm busy monologuing over my worst enemies? It's hard enough where your world spin like crazy!"

Man, I hope the Old Man can hold his stomach.

"BLEERGH!"

Oh, never mind.