Chapter 12

My J.R is avoiding me. It's quite evident in the way he refused to glance in my direction, and in the way he only makes sure to pass wherever I'm not.

He's been like that since yesterday when I left him at his locker. I had planned on locating him during supper and trying to come to the root of the issue, but he had skipped supper.

Which made me wonder whether it was something I did. Whether it was something I said. As far as I can see, everything was going on well between us so far. But then I'm not surprised, he has been hesitant and weary about spending time with me since the moment he arrived here. And he even told me so himself. 

But I'm quite persistent when I want to be..and right now, I really want to be. 

I don't believe I've ever enjoyed anyone's company as much as I enjoy his. And there's little to enjoy when you've spent almost your entire life in a boarding school. So I make a habit of holding onto whatever thrills me. And my sweet Jerald thrills me like nothing before him ever has.

There's only one period left before the classes are done for today. We both have literature, and as he has been doing since yesterday, he walks in and sits as far from me as I deem possible. Then throughout the lesson he has his eyes on the teacher, on the window, on the books on his locker...he has his eyes fixed on anything that isn't me.

After class I stood up when he did and followed him out, he seemed to be in quite a rush to get to his locker, where he would stuff his books then go to the library, or back to his quarters.

He sensed me following him but didn't stop until he got to his locker.

" I'm not sure but something tells me I'm being ignored. "

He placed his books inside and locked the locker, then he turned to face me. His expression a mask of seriousness.

" You admire frank remarks, do you not? " He asked and I gave him a nod.

" That's true, "

" Okay, then I'll try my best to put this as plainly as I can...." he flicked his eyes across mine, then he lowered them to the floor and seemed to be deep in thought.

" I think it would be wise if we stay out of each other's way from now on, "

" Really ?" 

" Really, " he affirmed.

He sounded as if he was trying to convince himself more than he was trying to convince me.

" And the reason for this decision is? "

" One that I believe you're well aware of."

Students were walking all around us, laughing and chatting loudly. Glad that the lessons were finally over. I had swimming practice in fifteen minutes but I would be glad to get there late if it meant completing this conversation.

" I have no clue where this was leading, but I can't let it get there, " 

He sounded sorry as he told me that. 

" Because of what, exactly?"

His answer was slow to come, I watched as he held the lovely watch around his wrist, then he ran a hand through his hair and looked up at me.

" Culture, " he said , " Following through with this would be against my culture. "

And with that he walked away. And I didn't have it in me to stop him, or to ask for some sort of explanation. Because from the second I saw him, I had known that he would probably be held down by who he was. 

But I wasn't planning on giving up. I went to swimming practice while devising it all in my head. I had to make him let go of his fears and his restrictions...there was no denying the natural chemistry that we had. 

So that evening, after I had showered and changed, I went over to his quarters and knocked, he opened up the door after what amounted to five minutes. I would have given up and left but I didn't. I knew he was in there.

He stood below the door frame and gave me this look that said, ' we talked about this ' . And I simply shook my head and asked whether we could talk for a few minutes. He looked back into his room then he stepped to the side and let me pass through. 

" You're a rather insistent person, "

" It's one of my many flaws. "

He gestured to the seat next to his window and I shook my head. I preferred to stand, and it appeared so did he.

" I admire your loyalty to your culture, " I said and he narrowed his green gaze at me.

" And I admire that you walked all the way here in an attempt to make me rethink that loyalty. "

" You're wrong. I'm not here for that, " 

He walked over to the desk on one of the walls and leaned against it. 

" Then what are you here for? "

I leisurely walked around the room, running my hand over his things, wondering how his entire room could be so filled with his scent after only three days in it.

" I want us to talk, like the mature and direct individuals that we are. "

" Isn't that what we're doing? '

" Tonight at the spot I took you to yesterday. Immediately after supper. "

He shook his head, then said he didn't think that was such a good idea. 

" Don't worry, I promise not to do anything you find uncomfortable. " I assured him. He locked his fingers together on his laps and turned to the side.

" Okay. " He gave in.