Chapter 2. Emotions

The next day John had asked to go the the park, not to play but rather to experiment with his music and emotions. His mother was a bit worried about his insistence to go alone, but figured that the reason is that it would be embarrassing for his mum to be there with his friends.

After reaching the middle of the park john sat under a tree and sat down, book on his lap. listening to the music only he could hear, its gentle sway was somewhat different and something he would like to make a note of in his journal.

After John had sat down and focused, he started thinking of a memory. Just like before the music picked up and became jumpy, humming along to the music. John feels like it would be a lot of fun to play this on his cello.

Weightless-ness overtakes him and he feels part of the air. John stood up while still playing through the same memory, currently he was using the excitement of the roller-coaster he went on last weekend. If he were to open his eyes he would see around him the grass growing upwards and the tree stretching its branches just a little further.

but the excitement only lasts a moment, as once the memory of the roller-coaster has reached the top of its climb the excitement disappears it is replaced with feelings of thrill and nervousness. The music changes once again, it speeds up like the end of a virtuosic concerto. the grass around john is pushed as if a helicopter is hovering above it, book pages flapping and the tree sways with the 'wind', but once again he does not witness this.

John tries to keep humming along to the music but it has sped up so much, and changes so rapidly, he cant keep up and in his desperation to continue the feeling of being connected to the air, he gets frustrated and angry at his inability to sing along. The music twists and writhes under the new emotion turning into, not music, but a cacophony of sound. The screeching of violins and slamming of piano keys hammers upon his brain, until he can hold onto the feeling no longer. snapping his eyes open and releasing all his emotion in front of him, he witnesses the power of his music first-hand as Infront of him as he sees trees in the distance being knocked down by an invisible shockwave.

In a panic john takes his book and runs in the opposite direction of the trees until he can find a park bench a far distance from the incident. When he sits down he opens his book and, with shaking hands, starts to write:

Journal #4

I don't know what's going on can somebody please explain. I don't know what to write down, I was feeling angry that even after practising music for so long I couldn't keep up, it didn't seem that hard either, it just surprised me that it changed so suddenly and I could never get a grip on it after falling behind.

I think I need to be wary what I think of and do. Also its weird that the music was different when sitting next to th-

"Johnathan!"

he's broken out of his writing by his mother shouting for him in desperation. looking in the direction of the noise he sees his mother frantically running and looking for him. he calls out to her and they make eye contact.

"oh thank god!" she says hugging john after catching up to him

"I was worried that the trees falling over may have hurt you" she says with relief

"don't worry mum, I was on the bench the whole time." he lies

"I'm taking you home young man"

After arriving home john head straight up to his room put his journal underneath his pillow and laid down ignoring the low droning of the music which is changing a bit more active than normal though he pays it no mind. all he wants to do is nap but the boring music that normally lullaby's him to sleep has turned ominous in his mind.

Some time later at the breakfast table john asks his dad if emotions can be controlled as hoping to sort out his musical problem as his previous attempts had failed.

"emotions cannot be controlled, only managed, though the important part isn't about what you're feeling but instead what you do with that emotion not to say what you're feeling isn't important just lesser so" his dad says

john's face pales at the fact that is power may never be controlled. his dad noticed this and says

"see your already losing control to fear, you need to manage it. although you may be afraid, for whatever reason, you must face whatever is effecting you unless you want to become a slave to whatever's worrying you, and the way you do that is first realise what exactly the problem your afraid of is and secondly make a plan to fix it."

john pauses and thinks for a second 'isn't that what I've been doing al this time with my journal? ill have to write in it again' his dad interrupts his thoughts with another idea though.

"you could try meditation, I've heard that it helps calm people though I personally have never done it before."

"what is meditation?" john asks, he had heard of it before but only in passing and didn't truly know what it was.

"Truthfully I don't fully know what it is either but, from what I gather, its sitting down and thinking about your actions and thoughts in the past until your mind is at peace. some people use scented candles and the sound of running water to help them, though I don't know if that's truly necessary."

John nods absentmindedly.

Johns dad set of to work and john went to school though he didn't pay much attention to class, and instead about what his dad had said.