"Leah.... Leah" I heard at full volume, the voice of my mother as I tried opening my eyes, blinking multiple times still trying to adjust to the light coming into the room from the windows. "Oh no it's morning already and I woke up late again, Mom is so gonna give me an ear full *sigh*. Why the hell do I sleep so much, whyyy!!" I thought as I scolded myself ,while roughly grabbing and fondling with my hair.
"You have really got to stop acting so irresponsible, I mean you are almost 18", Mother said as she shifted the curtains to a side so as to let light fill the dark room.
"Good morning mummy, how was your night?", I said as I got up to stretch before stepping out of bed to wash up. "Good morning young lady , my night was fine" , mum replied with an angry look on her face, not bothering to ask how my night was, well, not like I really cared.
"I really don't know what you'll be like when you finally become married", mom said whilst still in my room sorting my clothes out, the reason? I didn't know.
It took me a while to process what I was gonna say to her, as our last argument which occurred as a result of me saying, "I didn't wanna get married" caused days of hostility between the both of us.
I have had this phobia for marriage after a few relationships I have had. The longest I have had was for about 5 or 6 months I guess, and I know you all want to know why. Well, it's simply because I fell out of love, I guess I'm just not cut out for romantic relationships. I have also lost many friendship bonds due to the fact that i.... Now that I think about it, I just don't know. I see marriage as nothing but an upsetting bondage, no matter how many couples I see celebrate their anniversary year after year .
So I simply replied her as carefully as possible after much thinking, trying to avoid any arguments. "Well, when I finally get married [which is not gonna be happening in this lifetime, I thought to myself] , I'll try my best to be much more responsible" and mom replied with the words I never thought I would feel guilty for after hearing.
"How happy would I be seeing you walking down the grand aisle in a magnificently gorgeous white flowing dress, and your husband in a black tuxedo matching his handsome face, It would make I and your dad the happiest people in the world" I didn't realize that I had stopped brushing.
It took me a while to snap out of my daze as i hurriedly replied her like someone who had almost committed a crime but got walked in on by an unexpected guest and had to cook up some lie fast so as not to get discovered.
"yeah , I would be happy on that day as well... with my husband... and i.... walking down the aisle and all.... It sure would be the hap... happiest day of our lives" I said as I rinsed my mouth and proceeded to take my bath as I looked so nasty. "I wish i could really love someone who truly reciprocated my love for him, but who can i actually come to love wholeheartedly without falling out of love with" I thought to myself as I entered the bath tub.
As I was about to get into the tub, a scene of the dream I had last night which I thought I had forgotten flashed through my mind. The face of the most gorgeous and unearthly beautiful being I have ever seen, he was nothing like I had encountered before.