Ep. 69 - Luminous, Dragon Girl, Slime... Girl?

Great, so I finally understood what is beyond God. An entire fucking Heaven. Like, in ancient cosmology and Christian literature, Empyrean Heaven was the highest heaven and the dwelling place of God. That is probably incredibly wrong or extremely paraphrased, but I am basically a thing now, not a being. Ah, forget it, it's a cool title, so who gives a fuck.

Oh, a little detail I may have missed is that since we continuously destroyed and rebuilt the world these past days, we have all become Demon Lords and surpassed it. We are certified Demon Empyreans now, which brought about another evolution for all of us. I am now the 'Original Demon Empyrean of Original Knowledge'. Ugh, it's getting too long.

Now then, I haven't paid much attention to Luminous with all of this 'Evolution Fuckfest' that has been going on, so it is time I have a nice chat with her.

I was seated on my throne as always with an interesting novel I found in this world. 'I should totally go to the Narutoverse and get a copy of the Icha Icha series. Oh, and the cool eyes. I don't actually need them, but it's free real-estate, so why not.'

I had called Luminous so that I could have a chat with her, so I just had to wait. Oh, I had Merlin nestled in my arms. She liked staying there since she completed her evolution. It made my wives jealous, but I am a very benevolent Empyrean and spread my love to everyone; that seemed to placate them. Good, because I think that Merlin became a Yandere and is trying very hard not to kill all the women that surround me. On that note, I left a clone with my not-so-adorable apprentice, so I don't have to worry about her.

At any rate, Luminous arrived and I created a seat for her.

"Sit down, Luminous. Tell me, are you having any difficulty in your job? Inconveniences?"

"No, Master. No inconveniences whatsoever. Maybe just the fact that this Tower is a maze to navigate, but that is not a problem."

"Good good. Any questions? I am a benevolent person, so I will answer anything."

"Why me explicitly? Amethyst has shown me your powers and you all could easily create the perfect maid, someone more powerful and beautiful than me…"

"Oh, that. Pretty simple. I enjoy changing people. My first wife, Weiss, was the 'ice princess' when I first met her. What do you think about her now?"

"Uhm… A very open and gentle person?"

"Fair enough. That's only with us, but yes. Amethyst was also an orphan without a home in another world. I saved her and she became my assistant and apprentice. Well, forget the apprentice part because she did everything by herself and she acts more like a maid than an assistant, but it's fine. Jaune was weak as fuck, no offense intended. Everyone in the original gang helped him out and look at him now. Blake was another antisocial girl… Basically, I want you because you are not the perfect maid." I said, turned a page of my novel, then continued. "Oh, and don't worry about the beautiful part. You are already good enough and becoming a Goddess and an Empyrean later will definitely boost your charm."

"I see- Wait! Becoming a Goddess?! As in like you guys?!" she said, basically jumping out of the chair.

"Yes, like us. All of the people that come with us need to be powerful. Think of it as an incentive to work hard for a lot of time…"

"Exactly how many years will I have to work for you?" she asked, hoping that it would only be a few centuries or millennia at most. It would be worth it if she could actually become a Goddess. She had no idea what Empyrean meant.

"Oh, about for… Eternity? Yeah, that seems reasonable. After all, from the moment I met you, the concept of death doesn't apply to you anymore. Welcome to eternity, Luminous Valentine."

"Fu- Ahem! Thank you, Master." she said with a bow. Oh, I enjoyed giving her hope then shattering it.

We were currently at Sol 38. Why am I calling them Sol? Because I recently checked the knowledge I got from the Fate universe and there was this movie about a guy getting stranded on Mars… It was pretty good, I liked it. They have my approval stamp.

Anyway, back to Sol 38. Everyone was an Empyrean now and our Spirits were stronger than ever. Me and Ais also integrated with Diana and Ariel, but that wasn't very important.

Today, an interesting little girl came by. Let me tell you how it went.

So, I was minding my own business aka reading a novel and resolving to quickly go to the Narutoverse while stopping time here. I was also cuddling with Merlin, who is much more touchy feely than my other wives. Well, Freya is too, but Merlin gets the trophy on that front.

Then, all of a sudden, some idiot attacks my tower. Seriously? You see a floating country that is literally defying gravity and you attack it? You want to die then.

Merlin didn't want to get up, but I tickled her a bit and she conceded. Heh, law of tickles. We teleported behind the assisted suicide candidate and were a little surprised to see a little girl. Another one.

"Oi, little girl! What the hell are you doing?" Merlin asked. She's pissed that a runt interrupted her peaceful time.

Said runt turned around and had a smile on her face.

"I am calling out the owner of the Tower! I want to fight with them!"

"Are you stupid or just too young to understand that they are on another level compared to you?" my Spirit asked. She doesn't like the kid at all.

"Hey! I am a real Demon Lord, you know?! I am super strong!"

"And yet my Tower wasn't affected at all by your attack. That was your Drago Buster, right? Hit me with a Drago Nova or whatever other powerful attack you can manage. I won't even put up my defences." I said and ended the integration with Merlin.

Her eyes shined for a second then she charged up a Drago Nova. She was using that thing, 'Stardust'. Pretty nice, better than magicules. My 'God's Heart' will love it. She finished charging up almost instantly, though it felt like a million years to me. Just too OP.

The annihilation ray/space-collapsing shining light/localized supernova thing hit me. Well, it hit a millimeter from my finger, where it accumulated into a ping-pong sized ball. Hm… Milim was pushing all her energy into this bad boy of a death beam. Guess she either wants me to take her seriously or she wants to play a little the big bois. Her face while trying to kill me is adorable, so I will forgive her attack.

When she was done with her Drago Nova, I was just standing there with a ping-pong ball in my hand.

"So… Should I give it back to you or can I keep it?" I asked. "On second thought, I will keep it." and I chomped on the ball of energy. Tasted like stars, don't ask me what that means. At any rate, my heart started pumping out very ungodly amounts of 'Stardust', stunning the already stunned Milim.

"So, kid. What should I do with you?"

"Uhm… Let me go?" she said, trying to act cute.

"Nope. To become a maid you go. Don't worry, Luminous is my maid as well and she can tell you that the work is not hard at all. You might actually like it." I said and teleported her to the Tower, a place from where she shall never escape… That makes it sound like kidnapping, which this basically is. Now that I think about it, didn't I also kidnap/blackmail Luminous? Nah, must be my imagination.

"Yep, totally your imagination Master! Those two are war prisoners!" said Merlin.

She's totally right and I don't want to have any second or third opinion otherwise I will lose two cute maids. That's a big no-no.

Like so, my current group consists of: me, my five/six wives (depends if you count Merlin as one, but I sure do), my original six friends from RWBY, two extra Goddesses, a cute daughter and her mother, a cute apprentice, a cute magical cat, a cool dragon, a sexy maid, two new junior maids, several Spirits… Quite good, I need more familiars for my friends. Let's see��� Seven could be the seven Primordial Demons. Great start, just need 11 more. Well, the six True Dragons could be good as well. One is dead, but that can be fixed. Maybe fusing them into one existence and gifting it to my apprentice would be good. I can then make copies of the original True Dragons and have them become familiars. Good, 5 more needed. Maybe an adult Ramiris, then the others can wait a bit.

Well, would you look at that? Four months spent spooking the shit out of people and eliminating pests that strayed too far from the planet's surface.

My dear apprentice has finally succeeded in making a great cultivation technique with the additions of the Magicules and 'Stardust'. My own insights and corrections allowed her to create the perfect technique for herself: the 'Fuck You Heavens Technique' allows her to change into a Servant in essence, as if she became a Pseudo-Servant like Mash. That eliminated most of her problems in regards to talent and such. It also gives her a custom magic heart like those I made through rituals, so she can sustain herself and her techniques. It also uses my own concept of 'why work when energy gathers by itself?' and created accumulation points throughout her body for all the energies we have encountered so far. Oh, a self-updating status as well since Excelia is mixed into the energies she is going to be introducing to her body.

Pretty good, so I fixed a couple of problems and had her start cultivating. She is still very slow, but Ai An reached Divine Origin Realm in these months and also reached Legend rank in terms of soul. I am satisfied with her progress.

Luminous and Milim have been introduced to cultivation as well, and have already become 'Origin Goddess of Primordial Vampirism' and 'Origin Goddess of Primordial Wrath' respectively. They have also become Soul Deities several times over. I gifted them a Servant/Spirit. Milim got Edmond Dantès, obviously crazily strengthened and already a Divine Spirit, though I did give him a cultivation technique so he could become stronger. Luminous chose Yu Mei-ren, I did the same as with all other Servants. Cool.

Now, why am I skipping to exactly four months after Milim came to see me? Oh, that's easy. Somehow, a certain individual with high Karma managed to get reincarnated in this world. Can you guess who it is? I will give you a hint: it starts with an 's' and finishes with 'lime'. Well, you got it. The one, the only, the slime girl arrived! Oh, before you just start shouting 'It's genderless and identifies as a man', fuck you. I am a Go- Correction, I am an Empyrean, do I fucking care about genders? Hell no! If I say it's a girl, no one will say anything.

Anyway, I kinda wanted to see this new arrival, in particular because Shizue should be soon arriving. Ren is very interested in the girl, just from knowing of her with Omniscience. Actually, he's been stalking her a little. He fell in love at first sight, for real. It's uncharacteristic for him and Nora knows, so she accepted the new addition wholeheartedly. Ren actually got Leon Cromwell and tortured him in a time-accelerated room. He spent a grand total of 4537298 years before getting tired of it. He then eliminated the existence that was Leon Cromwell.

At any rate, me and Ren went to Veldora's cave and found this little slime. He was trying to escape, how cute.

"Stop escaping, Slime. Do it, and you might not die." said Ren. Apparently, his fusion with Mysterious Heroine X is affecting him to become more cold and ruthless. Oh well, he doesn't seem to mind and can perfectly control his state of mind, so nothing wrong here.

The guy was thinking: 'Oh, God! How the hell do I communicate with these guys now?! Are they even guys? The one with the armor is obviously a man, but I really can't tell with the other one. He looks too ripped and flat to be a woman… Yeah, man.'

"Congratulations, you guessed our genders! Want a prize?" I said.

'You can read my mind?'

"Of course we can, lowly being. We are not Empyreans for nothing. We have come here to meet you. You have an unnaturally high amount of Karma. Not to say that you did anything particularly great. It means you are lucky." said Ren

'Oh, I thought I did something big and didn't even know it. WAIT! Empyreans?! What the hell is that supposed to mean?!'

"Gods, the kind that can create an existence like you whenever. And, boy. We have met kids that didn't even grow facial hair that had to shoulder the weight of all humanity. Do you think you did something as great?" I said. At this point, middle-aged is nothing but a child to me.

'Kid?! I'm almost 40-'

"And we are several googols old. Who wins?"

'Tch, fine! Wait, I am missing the point here. Why would two Gods want to meet me, of all people?'

"Simple. You will end up doing great things to this world, while I want to plunge it into global conflict for entertainment. You seem like a fun guy, so we wanted to meet you. Also, you will soon meet a woman, Shizue Izawa. We will meet again then. For now, take this. It will help you." I said, throwing a ball full of magicules and 'Stardust' for him to feast on. It's equal to about 1000 Veldora's, so I will have no qualms taking him when I want to.

"Slime… Do anything to Shizue and you will regret not dying." said Ren, very ominously.

We teleported back to the Tower and were greeted by the gang.

"So? How is this future slime girl?" asked Blake

"Quite interesting. His Karma is really unnaturally high. He will be an interesting piece to manipulate in our little World War game." said Ren with a sadistic smile. He doesn't like the slime girl.

Actually, you know what? I won't touch his gender mentally, but I'll make him look decidedly female. I'll give him some 'Mega Milk' size knockers. I am talking 'doujin Artoria' size. Heh, I really want to see whether he can stay sane. I will also make a copy of Veldora to leave with him. A copy with an unnatural attraction to him…

"Master, don't forget to make 'monster size' the Veldora copy!" Merlin said.

"Oh, how could I forget about it in my nefarious plans?! Thank you, my dear Merlin."

"What are you planning now?" asked Jaune, with a smirk on his face.

"You know how I wanted to make 'him' turn into a 'her' mentally? I won't change his mentality. However, I will give him huge knockers and leave him with a 'monster size' dragon friend with an unnatural attraction for him. I want to see whether he can maintain his 'straight' thoughts."

"Ooh, that's fucked up… But I'm in! Call me when the 'show' starts, I'll bring the popcorn!" he said

"I will bring the drinks!" said Ren

"And I will bring the 3D glasses!" said Sun

"Perverts!" said every woman within an astronomical unit from us.